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Bane of a Hawke's existence

Summary:

Evangeline is used to fancy high town parties. Elia is not. Enough said.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Ever since the older Hawke twins had been dubbed ‘Champion of Kirkwall’ (the honour being bestowed upon ‘Hawke’ so the sisters had their designated times to be called such) they had been getting invited to more and more parties. To keep up their little game of which is which they had decided that when it came to business in Lowtown, Elia would take the title and Eve would be the tag along sister, in Hightown the positions were reversed. That being said, Evangeline had to be the one attending most of the parties, Elia being content to slip out of them.

 

This time, however, there was no escape. Usually Evangeline would take Fenris as her partner if only to keep her grounded and a constant reminder that no she was not allowed to kill anyone, but this invite was addressed to both the Hawke twins 1.0……..by name…...a month in advance. Which meant there was no possible hope for Elia to come up with some excuse to not attend. That being said, Evangeline, Sebastian AND Fenris have spent the last month trying to teach Elia how to act at a formal event.
“Now remember you’re not to swear.” Sebastian said, one arm crossed over his chest and the other supporting his aching head.
“Not even if they say something really stupid?” Elia asked with big innocent eyes.
“No!” The three tutors chorused and Elia flinched back.
“Now, you’re with the host, he asks what you think of the wine. How do you drink it and what do you say?” Evangeline asked, handing Elia a wine glass filled with water. Elia looked at the ‘wine’ for a second before bringing the glass to her lips and for a moment all seemed well but hopes were dashed as she threw her head back and chugged the liquid. Evangeline, Sebastian and Fenris all groaned.
“S’good. Taste like rotten grapes, like everyone other wine.” Elia commented with a shrug only to earn a light smack on the head from a rolled up paper (Ander’s manifesto) from Fenris.
“That is wrong.” Fenris commented with a sigh.
“You’re supposed to sip it.” Sebastian informed, quickly demonstrating with his own glass.
“And you’re meant to comment for example.” Evangeline cleared her throat and tipped her head in an approving manner “The wine is exquisite, Comte, the sweet taste reminds something of Shiraz Cabernet, did you get it from Orlais?”
“But I don’t like wine!” Elia complained with a huff, they’d been at this since the morning and the party was tonight. “You know I prefer cider.”
Evangeline groaned in annoyance, “Then politely inform the Comte that you prefer cider over wine.”
“Ladies, if you wish to be fashionably late, you’ll have to get ready.” Sebastian pointed out, glancing at the clock.
“Maker’s breath! She’s no where near ready!” Eve cried dramatically, not that she didn’t love her sister but at a formal event, especially hosted by an Orlesian, there were a thousand ways to offend someone and start a war.
“Eve look, I know this isn’t my scene but I’ll try, I promise. Besides what’s the worst that could happen?” Elia asked, already making her way up the stairs to her room to prepare.
“You have no idea.” Eve muttered, following after, filled with worry and dread.

 

“I still hate these damn things.” Elia groaned for the third time that evening, one hand on her stomach as she tried in vain to take a deep breath.
“You and me both, but unfortunately some social conventions must be followed for these sorts of events. On the bright side you may pass out from the stupid corset cutting off your air supply and then we can go home.” Eve sighed, carefully pulling her skirts an inch from the ground as she walked, “Elia, pick up your skirt or it’ll get dirty.” Eve hinted in a whisper. Elia huffed and went to bunch her skirts up to her knees until a hiss from her sister stopped her “Only enough so they’re not dragging on the ground.”
“This is painful.” Elia groaned.

 

Fashionably late: check.

 

The pre-dinner conversation was going all right. Elia had answered questions politely and quickly with only two near slips to which she earned a pinch from her sister to correct. Evangeline was actually beginning to think they could pull this off until a horrible woman, Countess De Laci, came up to the pair.
“Why Champion!” She shrilled, gaining the attention of the girls, “I had no idea you had a sister.” Her Orlesian accent was thick and the wine glass in her hand was already starting to tip, she clearly had already had a few glasses.
“Countess De Laci.” Evangeline nodded with a smile that contained so much malice a Qunari would run in terror. “Yes, this is my sister Elia. Unfortunately she is a very busy woman and hasn’t had much of a chance to attend these functions with me.”
“A pleasure, Countess.” Elia said with a small curtsy and Eve smiled in approval.
“Well it is nice to see you attending with a more civil partner than that elf. Although from what I’ve seen this girl is barely civil.” The Countess may have lowered her voice for the last part but both Hawke girls began seething at her comment but neither had the chance to say anything before she continued speaking. “Hightown is so beautiful this time of year don’t you think?” She asked and a smirk consumed Eve’s face as she sipped her wine.
“Oh yes, lovely, quite like a rose in bloom. I’m sure your daughter would agree.” Evangeline commented from behind her glass. Countess De Laci’s eyes widened as she nearly choked on her own wine.
“Uh, yes. Excuse me Champion, Serah Hawke.” Countess De Laci quickly scurried off with a face as red as the vintage she was drinking.
“What was that all about?” Elia asked with a giggle.
“Her daughter was caught in the Blooming Rose a week ago, one must always listen to gossip. Remember, Elia, if you absolutely must put a noble in their place do so subtly with tact and style.” Eve grinned before dinner was called.

 

Pre-dinner conversation: Check

 

The moment Elia sat down she went to spread her legs for comfort but a very dangerous glare from her sister had her crossing her legs like a lady.
“Napkin in your lap and remember, outside in for cutlery.” Eve whispered without looking to her sister and Elia nodded.
“What’s the little glass for?” Elia asked, still in a whisper.
“It’s a port glass. It won’t be filled until there’s a toast to be made when it is filled don’t touch it until it is time to toast. Just pretend to sip it, it’s horrid.” Eve made a face before quickly covering it with a sneeze and Elia had to giggle.

 

Dinner going well: Check

 

Things were going well until the inevitable question was asked.
“Serah Hawke, how do you like the wine?” The Comte asked. Evangeline’s breath caught in her throat as she turned to her sister with a pleading look. Elia hummed, sipped her wine like a lady before turning to the Comte.
“I’m afraid I’m not much of a connoisseur of wine, if I’m being honest I prefer cider, but as far as wine goes this is rather pleasant.” Elia commented with an affirmative nod and had they been in a different scene both the Hawke girls would have sighed in relief at how well Elia handle that situation.
“Ah! How rude of me! Of course there are people who do not like wine. Garcon! Fetch our finest cider for Serah Hawke!” The Comte seemed genuinely concerned that Elia was not enjoying herself and the sisters flashed each other a grin, this was going wonderfully.

 

Complement the wine: Check

 

Finally it was time to say the farewells. That went by quickly as all they had to say was there was business to attend to in the morning and they needed to get some sleep (lies all of it) and they were on their way back to the Hawke Estate. Bodhan had long since gone to bed on orders that he shouldn’t wait up for them and the moment the door was closed both girls pulled out daggers. Eve sliced through the ribbons of Elia’s corset and Elia did the same with Eve’s and the girls collapsed to the foyer floor as they got some much needed air into their lungs.
“I’m so proud of you!” Eve gasped out and Elia grinned like a madman.
“Yeah, I’m pretty proud of me too.” She laughed and received an elbow to the ribs from her sister.
“You need to thank Sebastian and Fenris for their help.” Evangeline huffed.
“I know and I will.”

 

The girl’s lay in the middle of the floor in silence for a moment before Elia burst into laughter.
“Maker, you were as brutal in that ballroom as you are on the battlefield.” She giggled and Eve grinned.
“Thanks, Elia, that’s actually really high praise coming from you. And now you know what I mean when I say The Game is dangerous.” Eve joined in the giggling as they both sat up.
“I need to attend more of these things with you.” Elia laughed and Eve paled.
“First you need to learn your manners. I can’t always keep an eye on you.” Evangeline huffed before smiling a moment later and bursting into laughter again.
“Point taken.”

Notes:

Ah the shittiest of daughters, again Leafbaby must be so proud of Elia.