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Dorcas was stirred awake from movement beneath her. She let out an unintelligible grumble tightening the hold of her arm and leg that were flung securely across Marlene in attempt to keep her pinned down. In response she heard a gentle huff of laughter. She smiled subconsciously in answer.
It was going to be a good day.
They’d fallen asleep early last night, in spite of it being a Friday (if only their younger selves could see them now). Marlene had had a busy week at work, she was never one to tire easily but it was clear this week had taken its toll. It had taken a toll on Dorcas as a result because call her a sap but she missed Marlene. Was she still seeing her every day? Yes. But Dorcas finds that point futile.
She was besotted with every form Marlene could possibly take; happy, angry, sad, hyper, bored, excited, stressed. She was there for her all week when Marlene would get home late, drop her bag at the door before falling into Dorcas’ arms and practically melting against her, most days too tired to even have one of her rants about her day. Dorcas would wrap her arms around her in the way she knew she liked to be held, stroking her hair and whispering softly to take her away from the world for a moment, bring her to a world of their own instead where Dorcas could ensure nothing bad could reach them.
But her favourite Marlene was a joyful one. The one who would talk incessantly about everything and anything with such high degrees of enthusiasm and passion Dorcas couldn’t help but be invested too. The one who danced and sang at any given moment, reaching out a hand to bring Dorcas into it too. The one who burst through the door whenever she returned with so much energy she would practically lift Dorcas off her feet when she greeted her.
They made sure not to make any plans for this Saturday so they could just have this time to exist and recharge. Evidently Marlene took that very seriously given the night before Dorcas had left her for only a few minutes to brush her teeth before bed with the intention to come back and give Marlene a massage or watch her favourite film so she could wind down. And instead was greeted with the image of Marlene already sound asleep starfished out in their bed, mouth open letting out soft snores. Dorcas was hopelessly endeared.
She smiled fondly to herself before climbing in beside her, settling in almost fully on top of Marlene, head pillowed just above her heart right where she liked it. It made her laugh at the difference in how they slept. Marlene in only her sports bra and boxers because she was a human radiator, while Dorcas had a curated collection of fluffy long sleeved pyjamas and if she was feeling extra cold fluffy socks too (which still horrified Marlene to this day). She supposes it makes sense that they work so well this way.
Equally Marlene wakes up bursting with energy while it’s a known fact that Dorcas takes a little more coaxing to get out of bed. Particularly right now when she is so content. The curtains are still closed, basking them in a soothing darkness despite it being morning, soft sounds filter in from outside providing a lulling peace, and she has her favourite person right in her grip warm and soft and lovely.
She thinks she’s won the battle for a moment when Marlene makes no further attempt to move, instead opting to run her hands with such delicacy up and down Dorcas’ back and across her thigh. But then she starts moving again, audaciously fragmenting Dorcas’ peace. Try as she did Dorcas was evidently weakened in her freshly awoken state seeing how Marlene managed to make her escape.
“Nooo” Dorcas whined, making a pathetic attempt at reeling Marlene back in.
“I’ll be back soon” Marlene soothed, balancing herself above Dorcas and dipping to place a kiss on her temple before she was off again.
She allowed the gentle sounds of life in the kitchen to soothe her back to sleep; the tap, the flicking of the kettle, the clinking of cups and plates, the light hum from Marlene as she pottered about.
The next thing she knew she was being showered with kisses all over her face. She scrunched up her face in response before giving into a chuckle as the rain of affection continued.
“You’re literally a dog” Dorcas laughed, eventually finding the energy to push herself up to meet Marlene’s eyes before placing a quick peck to her lips.
“I made breakfast” Marlene spoke, lulling her head to rest on Dorcas’ shoulder for a moment. Dorcas used to hate physical affection, found it unnecessary and awkward. But then Marlene came along with her subtle touches and clingy nature and Dorcas completely reversed her philosophy. She loved the obvious forms of affection of deep kisses and all consuming hugs, but she held just as much appreciation for the small ones. The brushing of hair out her face, the leaning against one another, a hand on her back in guidance, linked pinky fingers, legs pressed against one another. All their own language of, I’m here with you.
Marlene shuffled to the side slightly so she could bring the wooden tray down between them. Two plates of French toast, Marlene’s speciality, both dusted with cinnamon, hers drizzled with honey and blueberries, Marlene’s with Nutella and strawberries. Then two teas, a peppermint for Dorcas then a milky over sweetened horror of a tea for Marlene.
“Thank you, my love” Dorcas lifted Marlene’s hand to press a kiss to it in gratitude before tucking in. They sat in comfortable silence as they ate, the only sound drifting in from the radio Marlene had put on in the kitchen. Marlene had learnt many years ago that it was no use attempting to have a conversation with Dorcas in the mornings before she’d had a chance to fully return to consciousness.
“What’s the plan of action for today then?” Marlene asked once they’d finished breakfast.
“Nothing really. We could do with a food shop, but it’s up to you. I don’t mind if you just want me to go and get it so you can have a bit of recharge time” Dorcas answered.
“No, food shop sounds fun. I’ll come with, I’ve barely seen you this week I’m starting to forget what you look like” Marlene sighed dramatically as Dorcas scoffed at her theatrics. “And besides you can’t be trusted to get all the sweet treats if you go alone.”
Dorcas rolls her eyes knowing Marlene’s like a kid in the sweet shop whenever they go to the shops. Nearly every time there’s at least one item that gets scanned through at the till that she doesn’t remember picking up only to turn to Marlene who smiles sheepishly in faux innocence.
“If you insist” Dorcas concedes before rolling out of bed to wash up their plates.
They got ready side by side and Dorcas revelled in the feeling of it. They had slightly differing schedules and so during the week never really had the opportunity of getting ready together. Even at weekends it would be an unlikely occurrence if they had set plans. They were both notoriously late, their friend group would always wind them up about it, a few times even telling the couple a different time in an attempt to remedy it.
With Marlene it was often a combination of poor time management and mixing up the time. With Dorcas it was often her refusal to rush for any form of transport, still traumatised by running for a bus at 14 and it driving off, and her insistence she must be feeling her best physically, mentally and spiritually before she set foot out the house.
But today they had all the time in the world if they so wished it. So Dorcas carried out her extensive skincare routine, while Marlene sat on the closed toilet seat brushing her teeth, talking about what they needed from the shops throughout. Marlene leaned over her to spit out the toothpaste meeting Dorcas’ eyes in the mirror to exchange a grin. Dorcas rolled her eyes good naturally at the state of Marlene, who seemed completely oblivious to all the toothpaste still round her mouth. She wordlessly picked up a flannel, wetting it under the tap then moving to clean Marlene’s face.
Marlene’s eyes watched her softly as she traced her features with the flannel, and when she finally pulled away, Marlene leaned right in and placed a delicate kiss on her lips. They both smiled into it.
When it came to getting dressed a problem presented itself. They shared wardrobes because early on they realised they treated each other's clothes as their own anyways. And yet in a rather comical fashion as they were going through the wardrobe this time they both went to reach for the same top.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Dorcas raised an eyebrow at Marlene not dropping the top.
“I’m getting my top” Marlene countered, narrowing her eyes.
“It is not your top” it was her top.
“Yes it is. I’ve had this since before we even got together” Marlene scoffed.
Dorcas was well aware of the fact. In their early days of dating Marlene would often wear it to see her, then it would conveniently get misplaced and Dorcas would only find it after Marlene had left and so like the good girlfriend she is would keep it safe by wearing it herself. It was nothing fancy, but it was certainly something special. It was comfy and it smelt like Marlene and it reminded Dorcas of the process of falling in love.
“You’re misremembering things love” Dorcas spoke blinking in as innocent a manner she could muster.
“You’re such a menace” Marlene tutted “you know what I think you’re too used to getting your way. Today’s the day I put my foot down” she physically stomped her foot in place in emphasis.
“Really?” Dorcas prompted, leaning into Marlene's space and lowering her voice to a whisper.
“Really” Marlene assured but her gaze had dropped to Dorcas’ lips and seemed unable to be pulled away
“Hmm alright” Dorcas hummed, now only a breath away from Marlene’s lips. Entranced, Marlene closed the gap herself, bringing her hands to rest on Dorcas’ waist as she moved her lips against hers.
Dorcas let herself get lost in it for a moment. The thrum of energy dancing between them, wondering if there would ever come a time when Marlene’s touch wouldn’t set her alight in such a vivid way. She laced a hand into Marlene’s hair, causing her to gasp that way she adored. Then with her other hand she reached down to Marlene’s to grab the top out of her hand. Marlene let it go willingly, seeming to not even notice for a few more moments. When she did she huffed out a laugh against Dorcas’ lips pulling away enough to lean their foreheads together and lock eyes.
“You…” Marlene breathed.
“Me?” Dorcas replied, faux confused.
“This is manipulation you know.”
“You’re right” Dorcas nodded solemnly “I shall never attempt such a tactic ever again.”
Dorcas let out an undignified squeal as Marlene barrelled into her laughing and landing them both on the bed.
“You’re not getting it back” Dorcas spoke primly.
“I know I’m not” Marlene smiled before ducking to place another kiss to her lips.
Dorcas kept her in place wrapping her legs round her waist and arms round her neck causing the rest of Marlene’s body weight to rest comfortably on her. Marlene snuggled her head into her neck and Dorcas could feel her smile against her skin.
They stayed like that for a while. Doing nothing at all and yet having the best time. Simply existing together.
The big occasions were nice of course but sometimes Dorcas’ most precious memories were ones like these, ones where she had the chance to appreciate all the extraordinary mundanities that they were granted with. A day of completely boring tasks that were made exciting simply by the other’s company.
⟡𖦹⟡
“Nope put that back” Dorcas insisted as Marlene returned to their trolley with a tray of 12 donuts in hand.
It was the same feeble attempt at refusal Dorcas had made with the pack of cookies, the chocolate bars, the bags of sweets, the massive tray of carrot cake. But this time she’d stand her ground. Dorcas didn’t have much of a sweet tooth anyway, never really getting the craving for it besides the odd biscuit with her tea. Marlene on the other hand would eat cake for every meal if she allowed it (as if that girl needed anymore sugar). The real issue lay with the fact that Marlene would insist on buying all of these treats despite it only being the two of them that live in the house and a few days later it would start to go stale which would result in a mad rush to finish them all which almost without fail would inevitably lead to Marlene overdoing it and feeling nauseous.
“I mean it Marlene, look at the state of the trolly” Dorcas attempted sounding stern but was already being weakened by Marlene’s pleading look.
Yet when Marlene peered into the trolley contemplative, even she couldn’t deny that they were potentially overdoing it given they had about five recognisable ingredients and the rest was all sweet treats.
“Ok fine. What if I put back the cookies and swap these donuts for your favourites with the salted caramel inside. That’s my final offer” Marlene spoke mock seriously, holding out a hand for confirmation.
Dorcas rolled her eyes at her, and yet was betrayed by the endeared laugh that slipped out as she met Marlene’s hand with her own “deal.”
They carried on down the aisle, Marlene joining her as she steered gently bumping her hip into hers. Dorcas cast her a side eye before bumping it back. Before long they were in a fit of giggles, finding themselves all too funny as they tried to bump the other off the trolley. Like always they got far too wrapped up in themselves forgetting where they were and so it wasn’t until they were crashing into another trolley that they recalled the fact they were supposed to be directing it much more responsibly.
“Do my eyes deceive me!?” Marlene gasped theatrically and far too loud for public. Fortunately, however it was none other than Lily and Pandora that they had bumped into.
“Hello you, reaping havoc as always” Lily countered as they moved their trollies out the way so they could talk properly “I can’t believe she’s dragged you down with her Cas.”
“I know, I know I’ll try to do better” Dorcas joked.
Dorcas secretly adored interactions like these, the ones by chance, that seemed to be gifted from the universe just when you needed it.
She was fond of quiet and peace and time alone. But she also cherished the bonds she had in her life, sometimes missing a time when everyone seemed to live closer and be more available. A last minute message an hour in advance to pop down to the pub and most people would be there. Even holidays could be discussed a month or so in advance and it would somehow all work out.
But they were growing up. They had their own houses now, high flying jobs, some were even starting to have kids. It made her so proud to see all her loved ones growing in all these directions, achieving and learning and experiencing. And yet a small part of her, that childhood version of themselves that everyone carried around inside of them, would sometimes feel this petulant need to have everyone close again.
Marlene and Dorcas had actually met through Lily and Pandora, their respective best friends who had been together for so long now she can’t remember a time of them being anything other than LilyandPandora. It meant they always had a particularly good time together with the four of them because they all knew one another so well and inexplicably fit together so perfectly.
When they first started dating Marlene and Dorcas had treated their two friends and some kind of wise lesbian Yodas, there through it all; the first dates, first kisses, first arguments, first everything’s.
Yet between the four of them and their schedules, as well as Lily and Pandora’s tendency to vanish spontaneously to travel for a bit then come back with the most ridiculous stories, they didn’t see each other as much as they liked. So if the catch up they were gifted had to take place in the cereal aisle Dorcas would take it and be grateful.
“Dorcas!” Pandora squealed barrelling into her in a bear hug, small as she was she had always had a big presence and so Dorcas found herself completely wrapped up by her. “Have you gotten taller since the last time I saw you?” She asked genuinely, squinting in suspicion as if Dorcas was playing a trick on her.
“Given I’m 28 and haven’t grown in over a decade I’m going to say no. Who knows maybe you’ve begun to shrink” Dorcas returned.
“You little rat, don’t mutter such horrors lest you speak them into existence” Pandora scolded, looking down to her toes and turning them slightly as though checking everything was in order.
“Have you guys been to the middle aisle yet, absolute gems in there this week” Lily spoke before they began showing off their findings from their trolley. There was a board game, entirely unsurprising given the cupboard the two had in their flat that didn’t shut anymore because it was overflowing with them. A flamethrower, which highly concerned Dorcas given Pandora's brief obsession with fire that only ended with a bonfire that got out of hand. Lily assured her that it was for the use of removing weeds, gardening being much more Lily’s realm of fun, although the wicked glint in Pandora's eyes and way she showed it off didn’t work to quell all of Dorcas’ apprehension. And a bright pink air fryer.
“I thought you guys already have an air fryer” Marlene commented because of course she’d be more concerned about that than what was practically a weapon they were yielding before.
“That one looked so lonely sitting there, needed some company” Pandora explained.
“Happy wife, happy life” Lily simply shrugged in agreement.
They carried on together for a little while after that, catching up on work and new hobbies. It all felt very mature of them. That was until they expectedly moved onto the gossip portion of the conversation and Dorcas was reminded they were still their teenage selves at heart.
Except the difference now was that gossip had moved on from who had a crush on who and which friend hadn’t shown up to someone’s party, to divorce scandals and who stole someone else’s baby names.
Eventually they parted ways with a promise for a wine night to come soon and they made their way round to get the rest of their shopping before heading back home.
As they reached the car to put the shopping away Dorcas couldn’t help but smile to herself, Marlene nudged her playfully with the trolley when she saw her expression but that only made the grin spread wider. It was silly how happy such simple everyday errands made her now but she truly thought if she got stuck in a loop of a day like this it was the happiest she could ever be; slow mornings, trips to the shops bartering with Marlene over what snacks to buy, and a chat with friends. Such a lovely way to spend her time.
⟡𖦹⟡
After they returned from the shops and put away the shopping she’d turned to Marlene in their kitchen wrapping her arms round her waist and gently placing barely there kisses against her lips, pressing the last one in longer that eventually had to break when they were both smiling too much for it to count as a kiss.
“Where to now?” She murmured, eyes still closed as she leaned further into the warmth of Marlene. She liked phrasing the question this way as though they were embarking on some grand adventure.
“Would you be up for the park?” Marlene suggested gently in response and when she opened her eyes it was to Marlene’s soft smile but an observant look in her eyes. Marlene had a bit of a reputation for being impulsive and a bit scatty and while that was true it wasn’t the extensive truth of all that she was.
Whether it was for a big decision like when her and Dorcas were moving out together and she wanted to gauge her honest opinion of a place or something trivial like the ice cream flavour she’d suggested someone having she was meticulous in taking a moment to observe someone’s expression to decipher how they were feeling and what they wanted. And Dorcas just had to give her another kiss for that.
“That sounds perfect, I’ll go get my book then we can go.”
Dorcas loved Marlene in the radiance of summer. As each season passed she would swear that was her favourite version of Marlene. Her in the autumn, bathed in warm tones of reds and oranges as she’d clutch a hot coffee in her hands and do that contended wiggle after the first sip. Her in winter bundled up in a thick coat and brightly patterned scarf, nose permanently frosted red. Her in the spring pointing out all the flowers blooming and dancing in the rain.
But right now she was so certain that this just must be the best version of Marlene to exist. The way the sun made her hair appear as spun gold. The shedding of layers that allowed more of her tattooed skin to be shown. The way the sun would get in her eyes but she was constantly forgetting her sunglasses so instead any time she turned to look at Dorcas it would be with an adorable scrunch to her face as she attempted in vain to shield her eyes from the light.
Dorcas’ setup was ideal, she had her new book that Marlene had bought for her the other day after seeing good reviews for it and for when she wanted breaks from reading she had the view of Marlene shooting hoops to bless her eyes.
Dorcas had played football at school, had been rather good at it actually, but hadn’t branched out into much more than that. Once she was good at something she enjoyed channeling all her energy into it and work to ensure she was the best she could be.
Marlene had also played football at school… and netball, and basketball and had dabbled in rugby, athletics and tennis. She was one of those annoying people who took to them all very naturally. It wounded Dorcas’ competitive side and yet over the years that has been overpowered by the sheer appreciation of watching Marlene do any kind of sport.
She was just having one of her Marlene-watching breaks when the subject of her observations turned to grin back at her as though she had a sense dedicated to Dorcas’ attention.
“See something you like?” Marlene probed teasingly. Dorcas rolled her eyes at her smugness feigning returning to her book.
“Actually I was just thinking about how your technique has got sloppy” the jab only served to evoke a laugh out of Marlene, so cocky in her abilities that she wouldn’t even consider Dorcas being serious in her statement. That and the fact that Dorcas had no clue about basketball technique.
“Oh is that so” and the tone of Marlene’s voice made Dorcas look up in alarm, she already began shaking her head in refusal. “No no, since you’re the expert come show me how it’s done.”
“I’m terrible at it you know that” She huffed a sigh as Marlene stood in front of her.
“Don’t worry I find it really endearing that you miss the hoop every time” and oh that got her up in an instant. One look at Marlene’s face told her this was exactly on purpose, using Dorcas’ pride and competitive streak against her to provoke her into playing with her and yet despite knowing she was giving into exactly what Marlene wanted she couldn’t help herself.
“Bring it on then” she spoke as though gearing up for war, bending her legs and rocking side from side despite being in a maxi skirt that wasn’t exactly providing her with the best mobility.
Dorcas couldn’t deny the fact that she was having fun. Everything with Marlene was and yet each time she uncovered another activity she hated doing in most circumstances but was thrilled with when with Marlene, she couldn’t help but be pleasantly surprised.
They ran around the pitch, stealing the ball from each other, sometimes playing dirty with tickles and gentle shoves. While Dorcas didn’t have much knowledge about basketball she was certain these weren’t the correct techniques and yet neither of them cared. And when Dorcas missed yet another shot at the hoop she didn’t protest as she normally would when Marlene came and lifted her up round her thighs so she could reach the hoop better and happily accepted the victory spin and kiss she offered her after.
They rested for a little after that, sat side by side on a wooden bench that had probably been there for longer than either of them had been alive. Leaning against each other and sharing a complementary silence. That was when their eyes drifted.
There were two ladies sitting on an identical bench to theirs, side by side leaning up against one another, just on the other side of the park. They had ice creams in their hands but they kept swapping it between each other and though they couldn’t hear the words they were sharing, they could hear the carefree laughter they shared. Their hair was fully greyed and their eyes wrinkled with time but their laughter was so bright and vivid you could blink and see two much younger girls in the same place from decades passed. It becoming clear how those crows feet and smile lines had been hard earnt through years of bringing joy to one another’s life.
“That’s going to be us when we’re older. We’ll be old and wrinkly but our love will keep our souls young” Marlene hummed contentedly as though she hadn’t just said something incredibly profound in Dorcas’ mind.
She would say things like that sometimes, so casually, little promises of their future. It lit Dorcas up inside every single time.
Dorcas remembered vividly that moment she knew she intended to keep Marlene forever and give all of herself to her in return. It was nothing monumental by nature. They’d booked to go see Moulin Rouge in the theatre, Marlene had insisted that Dorcas leave it all to her.
Since they’d got together they took each other out on dates in equal measure, yet with differing approaches. Dorcas tended to ask Marlene at least a week in advance and she’d plan an itinerary so when the day arrived she didn’t have to think about anything except enjoying the time with her Marlene. Alternatively, Marlene tended to opt more of the spontaneous date. She would burst through the door insisting Dorcas came with her right now because she just had the most splendid idea or saw something she knew Dorcas would just love. Or if she did plan one in advance, she as she liked to call it would “just go with the flow” and “see where the wind took them” after they reached the vaguely allotted date spot.
Because of this when it came to bigger trips Dorcas normally took the wheel, given Marlene’s propensity to not plan things through very effectively. But not this time. Every time Dorcas made any attempt to inquire about the details or check Marlene had booked the right seats or ensured the trains were running normally that day, Marlene would instruct Dorcas “not to worry her pretty little head about it” and proudly declaring she had it “completely entirely sorted.” Of course this is the woman Dorcas would trust with her life and so she let it rest.
They got all dressed up, made the journey there, only to reach the door and be told their tickets were for a week's time. Marlene’s face had completely dropped, she’d tried to see if there was any way they could change them and was told they couldn’t as it was sold out. Of course Marlene’s usual stream of dramatics entailed.
“Are you mad at me?” Marlene had asked petulantly like a scolded child.
“No I'm not mad at you” Dorcas assured with a roll of her eyes.
“You should be mad at me” she insisted.
“Well I’m not” Dorcas offered in return, expecting to feel exasperation but instead struggling to suppress the fond smile gracing her lips.
“I’m a terrible girlfriend” Marlene sulked and through all the melodrama Dorcas saw that Marlene was genuinely beating herself up about the whole ordeal. That was the thing about Marlene, she was always so intent on those around her feeling the love she had for them. Dorcas witnessed it both first hand, but also with how she interacted with her friends and family, or even strangers. Marlene loved with her whole being and so when she felt she had not done a sufficient job it physically diminished that light she carried with her.
“You’re the best girlfriend” Dorcas spoke more firmly now. She grasped Marlene’s hands in hers and moved her head to meet Marlene’s eyes. And she meant it with every fibre of her being. It wasn’t just a way to comfort Marlene, in her mind it was a fact.
Marlene had held her gaze for a moment and Dorcas had never felt so seen. Felt Marlene reaching into her soul through their connected gaze, not with an intrusive rummage but rather a caress. She was reading the sincerity of Dorcas’ words, processing their layers and all the feeling embedded with them. Dorcas allowed her to carry out this process, without any sense of fear. She was someone who valued a sturdy emotional barrier between her and the rest of the world. Eyes were the window to the soul, but hers was always locked. Until Marlene came along with the key.
Seemingly soothed, Marlene broke out a small bashful smile. Dorcas offered her own in turn and felt a spark of energy as she visibly saw that light return to Marlene’s eyes.
“Ok, yeah, it’s fine” Marlene nodded along to herself. Then she lifted Dorcas’ hands to her mouth and placed there a reverent kiss. “This is still going to be the best night ever, I’ll make sure of it.”
That was all the information she provided her with before interlinking their hands and turning to leave.
“Where are we going?” Dorcas asked, a disbelieving laugh bubbling out of her.
“Erm, so I haven’t got that far yet. But just know we’re definitely going somewhere and you’re going to love it.”
And maybe it was irresponsible to trust another of Marlene’s whims given the so recent fallout of one of her others. But how could Dorcas not. She followed contentedly after Marlene and when she turned back to give her that grin of hers squeezing her hand excitedly Dorcas knew. Knew without paying much mind to it she had passed her heart over to Marlene and if she were to look into the palm of her own hand she would see Marlene’s heart given in an equal exchange.
This feeling of love was not new, but the feeling of belonging was. The understanding that she would go anywhere, do anything, be anyone so long as it was with Marlene.
They had had the best night that night. There were stops at random pubs that they were far too overdressed for, dancing in the middle of the street as a stranger played an instrument Dorcas didn’t even recognise, there was choosing little trinkets from a random stall they stumbled across, there was running to catch the last train and being carried bridal style when Dorcas’ heel broke.
It was the best night. But so was the night where they stayed in watching tv because Marlene had a cold. So was the night where they’d gone to Marlene’s work party and she had proudly introduced Dorcas as her girlfriend to anyone who passed. So was the night where they eventually made it to the correct Moulin Rouge show.
Oh and then there were the mornings. And the afternoons, and the evenings, and the time where the world was quiet and they seemed to exist in a space of their own. Or where the world was loud but nothing distracted them from the other. Her best moments were these moments with Marlene and that night she had realised her best moments would always include her presence.
Maybe there’d be arguments or stresses but it would never pull them apart. Dorcas was not an optimist by nature but she was an optimist for their love. And nothing fuelled that optimism more than Marlene’s little anecdotes of their shared future. Growing old used to scare her but growing old with Marlene was something to be excited about, a blessing to get to experience.
So she turned her head to press a kiss to Marlene’s forehead and returned to their shared silence where she let herself create an image of what their future could look like together.
⟡𖦹⟡
After showering off all the hard work from their game in the park, they’d taken up their resident spots in the kitchen, Dorcas in front of the hob while Marlene sat perched on the side next to her stealing bites when she thought Dorcas wasn’t looking and catching her up on work gossip she hadn’t had a chance to fill her in on yet.
Cooking was one of the things Dorcas was good at. She’d discovered it at a young age and yet had regretted it soon enough when they led to her being the designated cook for any family event.
But living with Marlene had reignited her love for it. Dorcas enjoyed trying new recipes and experimenting with flavours and while Marlene wasn’t exactly the best assistant chef with her easy distractability leading to one too many smoke alarms going off, she was a magnificent taste tester.
She was someone who would eat just about anything and so Dorcas never had to worry about which ingredients the recipe consisted of. She also would give Dorcas honest feedback while always finding a way to rain her with compliments which worked both for Dorcas’ ego and her desire to improve.
This time she was making a crispy chicken Caesar wrap, combining two of Marlene’s favourite things.
“Can you pass me the Caesar dressing please?” she asked. All the food was cooked she just needed to mix the ingredients together and toast it. She was getting to that point where surrounded by all the smells of the food she was becoming absolutely ravenous and couldn’t wait to tuck in.
“Erm babe… I don’t think we have any” Marlene spoke apprehensively after looking through the fridge and the cupboards. The tone of her voice showed she could pick up on the fact that Dorcas was on the verge of getting hangry very soon.
“Ok that’s fine I can make my own” she heaved a sigh willing herself to stay composed, she started picking out the ingredients she’d need “ok now I just need mustard.”
She turned with a hand held out waiting for Marlene to place the mustard in her hand from where she was rooting around the fridge. Until she finally turned to her empty handed with a grimace on her face.
Dorcas dropped her head back looking at the ceiling with a pout on her face. She’s always normally so good at double checking ingredients but sauces were the kind of thing they always just seemed to have so she hadn’t bothered.
She startled when there was a kiss pressed to her cheek.
“I’ll pop to the shops give me ten minutes max” Marlene spoke, already slipping her shoes on. It was enough to thaw Dorcas’ pending hangriness in an instant.
“Thanks lovely, but don’t worry I can come up with something else I’ll just save this for tomorrow or try-“ the disappointment in her voice was still seeping through despite her attempts to stop it and Marlene silenced her with a quick peck to her lips.
“Ten minutes, you can literally time me” Marlene insisted, not giving room for Dorcas to argue and she couldn’t help the smile that bloomed on her face at Marlene’s sweetness.
It was how she always was. Constant gestures that expressed her love. She knew Dorcas would feel disappointed that the recipe didn’t go how she wanted and would inevitably convince herself it tasted bad no matter whether it did or not and so she found a way to remedy that immediately. It didn’t matter that they’d already gone to the shops today or that she was settled inside not planning to leave the house again for the rest of the day. She jumped at the chance to cheer Dorcas up in any way she could.
And she did. When she came bursting through the door a surprisingly short time later, breathless after evidently taking her own set time limit seriously. Striding over to where Dorcas had taken up Marlene’s resident spot on the side and immediately unloading the bag still fighting to catch her breath.
“We’ve got a bottle of Caesar dressing, apparently from Italy itself” she gasped theatrically holding the bottle up as though trying to sell it to her, which won a laugh out of Dorcas “a bottle of mustard in this gorgeous shade of yellow” Dorcas laughed harder leaning her arms on Marlene’s shoulders “and some flowers for my preemptive compliments to the chef” she revealed the bouquet from behind her back with a flourish.
Then she was being crushed into a kiss, Dorcas wrapping her arms and legs round her and pulling her against her from where she was still sat on the side. Because what else could she do when her girlfriend was being so ridiculous and lovely.
“Well if this is how all your customers get treated I’ll have to come to this restaurant more often” Marlene giggled at her own joke when Dorcas finally released her grip on her.
“Thank you my absolute darling, angel, sweetheart” Dorcas spoke, punctuating each word with a kiss around Marlene’s face, smiling as Marlene’s cheeks flushed red.
Dorcas finished off the food in much better spirits now, while Marlene set the table, placing the bouquet at the centre. They ate together, chatting and laughing about everything and nothing, Marlene waxing lyrical about how delicious the food was.
Marlene insisted on doing all the washing and drying up as Dorcas was the one who had cooked but it had always been one of Dorcas’ favourite quiet intimacies, passing each item to one another, soft words exchanged, so she joined her at the sink.
They settled down after to watch the tv show they’d been watching together but hadn’t had much time to catch up on lately. As they did Dorcas carried on with the jewellery project she was working on, it was a necklace for Pandora with all their friend groups' birth stones on. Dorcas struggled to ever be still completely and so this was a good compromise for whenever Marlene was trying to get her to relax, as she could easily split her attention between the show and the jewellery making as it was a skill she’d managed to hone quite effectively now.
“I don’t think we’re at peak relaxation yet” Marlene tutted solemnly after another episode had finished. She was sprawled out on the sofa leaning next to Dorcas now instead of on her after accidentally knocking all the beads on the floor when a scene made her jump on the tv. Dorcas was certain they’d be finding those little beads for months after.
“I can assure you I’m very relaxed” Dorcas confirmed absentmindedly patting Marlene’s head like she was an unruly dog that needed calming.
That seemed to satiate Marlene for all of ten minutes before she could be heard heaving an overly loud sigh again.
“Marlene if you have something to say, do go on perhaps without the unnecessary theatrics” Dorcas relented with incredulity.
“Well it’s nothing really” why this woman insisted on being so difficult sometimes Dorcas did not know, and why she still somehow found it endearing she also did not know “I just thought maybe now seemed like a good time to break into the fancy skincare hamper you won at the work raffle” with this she turned to face Dorcas more or less batting her eyes at her in an attempt at persuasion.
Marlene was not into skincare in the same way that Dorcas was and yet for some reason she was obsessed with face masks. Dorcas’ side of the bathroom cabinet was filled top to bottom with a variety of toners and serums, concoctions of all sorts whilst Marlene had a single bar of soap, a face cream that claimed to be for body, hands and face (a fact that made Dorcas shiver with concern) then every other space was filled with a variety of face masks.
Dorcas had won a hamper of skincare at her works raffle and yet she couldn’t quite bring herself to crack it open yet knowing that despite spending too much on skincare, she didn’t think she could ever quite justify extending that to the luxury of the fancy brand of the hamper. So she declared she was saving it for a special occasion.
This did not however stop Marlene from leering over her shoulder on various occasions with little comments like “wow those face masks in there look really nice” and “what constitutes a special occasion anyways.” Never one for subtlety.
And today certainly wasn’t a special occasion. It was a random Saturday far from any birthdays or other holidays, they’d barely left the house more than to pop to the shops and the park, they would only be going to sleep after. And yet it felt like a special day in spite of it all.
Days like this where the love she felt was a visceral thing that wrapped around her and warmed her inside out. And so she acquiesced quite easily as she often does with Marlene and gave her the go ahead to get the face masks. She squealed in response with such fervent glee you would’ve thought she’d just been told she won the lottery.
They’d applied each others, gentle fingertips spreading the mixture across the faces they knew as well as their own. And Dorcas hated to admit it but she did feel much more relaxed now.
“I can’t believe how pretty you look even with this on” Marlene spoke absentmindedly as she connected the face mask from her cheekbone to her temple.
“You’re such a sweet talker” Dorcas laughed in response despite the fact that the earnestness of her words brought warmth to her cheeks and she had to hold herself back from a grin at risk of cracking the face mask.
“Nope just telling the truth” Marlene affirmed before gasping and shooting up out of her seat before rushing away.
Dorcas looked after her fondly and yet slightly bewildered until she returns with her Polaroid in hand. It was a gift from Mary and Lily, after recalling the one Marlene had had during their teenage years and how she bought it with her to everything until it had got lost at a festival they went to. Now every time Marlene remembered it she’d be overjoyed at the opportunity to use it. Everyone who entered their flat had had to undergo an inescapable experience of having their picture taken so Marlene could add it to her collection.
They underwent a similar ritual for them now, passing the camera back and forth and making their memories eternal.
Afterwards they washed their face masks off, side by side at their sink, helping the other with any missed spots. Marlene then suggested they brush their teeth and put on their pyjamas then in case anyone (with a pointed look at Dorcas) accidentally fell asleep while watching the film.
Dorcas scoffed at that, assuring her she would not be falling asleep on the sofa… again. But did so anyways making sure Marlene knew this was out of comfort and not because she was going to fall asleep.
They settled in against one another, socked feet intertwining as they stretched out their legs together. Marlene wrapping her arms round Dorcas as she ran a hand up and down her forearm.
If anyone was wondering what Dorcas thought of the film she would answer that the start and the end were very good, although she didn’t have much of an opinion on the middle and that was for reasons completely unrelated to any falling asleep or prolonged closed eyes.
As the end credits rolled, Dorcas turned around to snuggle further into Marlene’s neck.
“It was better than I thought it would be actually, the part when they went to space was crazy” Marlene commented as she traced a hand up and down Dorcas’ spine.
“Yeah it was” Dorcas mumbled in agreement. But then the hand on her back stilled and she began to be slightly jolted as she could feel Marlene laughing against her. She untucked herself from her neck to meet Marlene’s eyes that were shining with amusement.
“Oh shove off” she grumbled, pushing at Marlene’s shoulder, Marlene having to tighten her grip on her waist to stop Dorcas from causing herself to fall off the sofa.
“We were watching a rom com why would they be in space? I knew you’d fallen asleep” she continued laughing hysterically, a sound that was unfortunately contagious and Dorcas dropped her head in embarrassment at being caught out, to join in her laughing.
“You bully me” she accused, still vibrating with the same laughter.
“Aw I’m sorry” Marlene tutted mockingly, but turned more sincere as she began stroking up her back again and assured “we’ll rewatch it again when you’re of more present mind.”
They carried on their laughing until they found themselves pressing kisses against each other's lips, sharing their love and happiness in equal measure. Until Dorcas let out a yawn which had them both laughing again.
They finally extracted themselves from the sofa walking hand in hand to the bedroom they shared, climbing into their designated sides that didn’t really mean much when they ended up settled on top of each other anyways.
A brush to her cheek caused her to look up just as she was slipping away from consciousness and yet those eyes that stared down at her had all of her attention, always.
“I love you” Marlene spoke whistfully, and Dorcas revelled in the way that each time Marlene said those words to her it somehow sounded like a new revelation.
“I love you” she returned, sealing it with a kiss.