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When she first heard the news, she didn’t believe them. It was just unthinkable. But slowly, the words Declan was saying started to sink, her world started to fall apart. How-How was this possible? M-Monica was d-dead… She couldn’t even begin to process it.
Unable to share her pain with her companions, she quickly excused herself and ran out of the room. She hid herself in the bathroom, finally letting her tears flow. There was no way to stop them.
It had been a long time since she had felt something so strong for another person. And God, it had to be Monica, she was so nice, so strong, so perfect, so herself. She had begun to envision them together; her leaving Tony, them enjoying some literature, some TV, some wine, some good music together. She had even started writing a song to gift her, something she really hadn’t done in a very long time, now, she wouldn’t be able to.
So, she just cried. For the lost hope, for the lost love. It wrecked her even more that she couldn’t tell anyone, that no one else knew. And it was really quite awful, she couldn’t even keep something from her, a keepsake, to remember her. The memories of their time together, albeit brief, would have to suffice.
That was just the way things went, she guessed. She eventually pulled herself together and left the restroom. By the time she came back to the kitchen, most of the team had already left.
Declan told her what the plans were for going to Monica’s funeral. She definitely wanted to be there, but she didn’t know if she was strong enough.