Chapter Text
Your name is Econ. It is an UNSEASONABLY COLD July day. Your BEDROOM WINDOW is open to let some air in, and your 12 FANS are cranked. Arguably even more cranked would be your MACHINES AND MACHINATIONS, which brings us to your variety of INTERESTS. A rad dude like you is sure to have plenty. You have a penchant for creating HORRIFIC MACHINES with your MIXING GEARS and OTHER TOOLS. You like to rave about INVENTORS NO ONE'S EVER HEARD OF BUT YOU. You collect WEIRD DEAD THINGS PRESERVED IN VARIOUS WAYS. You are an AMATEUR WRITER and operate your own MAKESHIFT WRITING STUDIO. You maintain a number of UNIRONICALLY ANNOYING ASS BLOGS, WEBSITES, AND SOCIAL NETWORKING PROFILES. And if the inspiration strikes, you won't hesitate to drop some. . . . .HORRIFIC HOMUNCULI on a hoe and REPRESENT. You proudly FUCKING SUCK.
What will you do?
> Econ: Look at yourself for once.
...no...OH YOU MEAN LOOK IN THE MIRROR...you finally look in the mirror....you look exactly like your brother did as a kid....just. like. HIM....you look at your shirt....its a disc. a melting disc...you look at your glasses....they’re metal and clear metal. their glowing. they don’t melt. not yet. not ever....your hair is like your big bros....you’ve never understood why he wears useless ass sunglasses. like their not even cool pointy anime shades.
> Econ: Find apple juice of the frozen Variety.
You are not hungry or thirsty so will NOT waste perfectly good substance for a GAG. plus your out and gotta melt your brothers swords so you can steal more frozen apple juice from the freezer. God your life sucks. anyway
> Econ: Go inform your bestest bro about the Discovery
fucking who?
> Econ: Go ask worstest bro about any and all possible Friends
Bold of you to assume your brother will listen to you...fucking EVER...but if you insist. You go to your brother...in his room....god your fucked. “Hay......Hay, bro......” he barely looks at you. “what” he finally turns to you “do you want” you clear your throat “Well....Uhhh...I have realized that i have....No friends....Could you help?” he throws a paper at you then flips you off...you leave and go to your room...’oileaterEaterofoil [OE]’...sounds weird.....your gonna talk to him.
> Econ: Message Them
you do- what fucking app uses this naming format? you go to newgrounds
‘Hello Helloooo HELLOOOOOO!!!!!! Its me! Does anyone know what app uses THIS naming format?’
you get a reply...the usernames from Pesterchum....fucking PESTERCHUM...christ. the oldest app known to the fuckin’ internet
> Econ: set up a account
you do the basic’s and think of a username...’overheatedClockwork’...fuuuck yeah. you press enter.....man that was....easy.