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They say it's a virtue to not let good love slip away. It's been about a year… maybe two since you last thought about him. Y’know? That friendly neighbourhood spiderman everyone talks about, well he was yours. You’re not really sure what happened between you and Peter. Looking back on it, you were both perfect, you spent so much time together, made so many memories; like that time you were strolling through central park and that bird decided to chase him down, you would think his spidey senses would help him out a bit but you were sorely mistaken. It's funny to reminisce, funny knowing that Peter probably doesn’t even give you a single thought anymore. You let him slip through your fingers and now you’re laid staring at the ceiling of your one bedroom apartment in Queens.
You stretch your arms out towards the sky and yawn as the sun creeps in through the bedroom window. Wincing at the bright orb outside as the bags under my eyes twitch. you haven’t had a good night's sleep in so long you have forgotten what it's like. You’ve never been much of a morning person anyways. Lazily, you drag yourself out of bed to make your way along the thin dusty corridor towards the bathroom. You stare at yourself in the mirror. “Wow i’m a mess” you say with a self-deprecating chuckle before taking toothpaste and a toothbrush to your mouth to start off the day feeling somewhat clean. As you’re standing staring at the mirror, you get flashbacks of a time there were two of us in this bathroom, brushing our teeth whilst listening to our favourite songs, sorting each other's hair and cringing at the nerdy jokes Peter used to say. God you miss him.
But it was for the best… that's what he said at least, and you didn’t want to be the anchor on his boat of success… so you let him go. As you finish off your bathroom routine you shift yourself into the kitchen to make some toast and put on the news in the living room, and of course, there was a robbery at the nearby bank this morning. you listen to the news as you butter your almost burnt toast. Then you hear his name- well his hero name; Spiderman. you sigh before digging into your toast, obviously he was there, why wouldn’t he be?
After devouring the nutritional breakfast you decided you should get out of this apartment for once, putting on comfy summer clothes in preparation for the heat of the outside world. You look at your reflection in the mirror, mustering a small smile of encouragement before stepping out into the busy world.
You took the train to Manhattan so you could walk through Central Park. It was one of your favourite places before you and Peter split up. As you walk through the park you take a deep breath of the somehow clean air in Manhattan and watch as the morning runners do their daily route, and the children playing in the park. ‘It must be a weekend’ - You thought to yourself. You lost track of the days weeks ago, every day just blurs into one when you stay hurled up in your one bedroom apartment, especially when you work from home.
You stop to take everything in, to sit on a bench with your emotions all welled up from the recent years. The way the world keeps turning whilst you’re stuck in the past, left behind with regret and clinging onto the memories of Peter. you hold your head low as a Gust of wind suddenly bursts past.
You raise your head to see a familiar figure facing you a couple steps away on the grass, They were standing staring at you, his puppy-like eyes speaking sympathy to yours. “y/n…” That all too familiar voice called your name as he took a step closer to you. You knew who it was, it was Peter. You wanted to be buried alive knowing he was here and you were simply a mess.
“Go away” You mustered weakly through the sickness in your stomach.
Peter looked at you with a shocked expression, The boy he once loved so dearly looked ruined, a shell of his former self. Initially he wanted to just walk past and ignore you, but he couldn’t just leave you like that, it wasn’t right.
“Please… y/n” Peter takes another hesitant step towards you, he worries that any sudden movements could break the boy in front of him, y/n looked so fragile, like a porcelain doll that could break at any moment. All he wanted to do was be there for him, despite how he ended things.
“Just go!” A yell came from y/n which startled Peter, he never realised how much hurt he caused the other boy. ‘Is that tears?’ Peter thought to himself, after the past two years Peter thought y/n would’ve moved on, found another guy who would spend more time with him, who would put in the effort to be there for him like he couldn’t.
He was silent, unsure of what to say. He wanted to apologise for how he left things with him. “I-... I’m sorry…” This was all he could muster awkwardly, in his mind he thought it was pathetic, pathetic that all he could muster was a simple i’m sorry.
He gripped onto the straps of his backpack as if it were his last lifeline before doing as the other boy demanded, he started to walk away. You halt Peter, gripping onto the back of his backpack as he walks away. “Wait…” you spoke with conflict in your voice, you were just telling him to leave and now you’re standing behind him with your eyes glued to the ground in hopes for some answers.
Peter turned around to face you, though you couldn’t see the guilty expression on his face. “Why’d you do it?” You asked through gritted teeth, you figured your last hope for why Peter broke up for you was a good one, that he had a valid reason for your separation. You looked up into his eyes awaiting an answer.
Peter’s mouth opened, Though nothing came out as he tried to come up with the right words to say. “I wanted you to be safe-...” He spoke with an almost timid tone to it. “Safe?! What do you mean safe! Is that all?!” You couldn’t restrain the frustration from leaving you as your hands formed into fists which lightly hammer his chest.
“I didn’t know what was going to happen okay!” he yelled in return, unlike his usual self. You looked at him almost shocked yourself, wondering what he meant, but you knew he was going to tell you. “I thought- I thought I wasn’t going to make it y/n… I thought I was going to die and- and I didn’t want you to live with that okay? Are you happy now?” His tone gradually softened from his yell as he explained himself.
He began to further explain that the night after they broke up, there was a massive fight with some sort of villain he used to talk to about some green named guy, you’d always forget his name. He knew this was going to happen… and he didn’t want you to worry.
“I- I begged you to explain yourself back then… I begged that we could work it out, I thought I did something wrong Peter-” You spoke defeatedly, you loved him, you loved him so much and the break up was so sudden. You thought he had found someone else, moved on to bigger, better things that you couldn’t be a part of.
“I know y/n” He spoke guilty as he bit his lower lip. He knew he messed up, especially waiting until now of all times to explain himself. “So why now… why now and not earlier?” you speak up, wondering why he decided to tell you today, and not after he survived the night after his little sacrificial escapade.
Peter stood there, brushing his fingers through his hair trying to form the right words in his head. “Because I wasn’t strong enough… I hurt you in more ways than I realised… So I distanced myself thinking I ruined the one thing I only wanted- -I didn’t know what to do y/n” He was honest, honest through the tense air, his tensed shoulders, even his tensed jaw. He was expecting aggression, some sort of anger to leave y/n. But instead you just hug him.
Hugging Peter left him flinched and a little confused. “You idiot” you speak through his shoulder which you burrowed your head in. Peter hesitantly wrapped his arms around your neck. “I’m sorry” This was all he could muster, knowing that y/n chose to handle this softly rather than with conflict reminded Peter why he loved him so dearly. It was refreshing, the opposite of his rough-housing lifestyle of a hero job.
“Do you think we can start over?” Peter asked coyishly as he looked into y/n’s eyes. You take a moment to think about it, starting over was going to be tough for you.
“You’ll have to regain my trust but- -I guess we can give this a second chance” You rubbed the side of your neck as Peter took your free hand with that dorky but grateful grin on his face that you remember you loved so much.
“Really!?” Peter spoke as if there was no nonchalant bone in his body, practically jumping at the opportunity to right his mistakes. “If that's the case I'm taking you to get pizza.” He spoke happily with a flirtatious tone, already jumping the gun. “Is this a date Mr.Parker?” you ask as a laugh leaves you. You were then dragged along beside Peter.
“Maybe!” Peter spoke happily.
And now you’re rebuilding your trust, rebuilding that love you once had one pizza slice at a time.