Chapter Text
"Ow."
Howard rubbed his forehead as he leaned down to grab the key that had been tossed at him. That was rude, but at least he hadn't had to fight anything to get the key he needed. His cheek still hurt from where his bloody counterparts had swung at him. He'd rather do a bit of chanting any day.
As he straightened up, Howard caught a glimpse of his false reflection looking... concerned? It was gone in a blink, so Howard couldn't be sure he'd seen it correctly, but that had definitely looked like concern. Now, his false reflection just looked bored.
"Thank you," Howard said, because even if the damn thing had mocked his mother's death, she had taught him manners... Nevermind that they had left him back when Phil got accepted to work on Greatmaw. Howard suppressed a wince at the memory and continued, "I appreciate you giving me the key. That makes progression much easier for me."
Something moved in the void behind the glass. His false reflection shifted to accurately reflect him, then went back to looking bored. "It's just because there's no space back here," it scoffed. "I don't care about you or that damn puppeteer."
So, the mirror knew about his quest... Howard wasn't surprised by that. But what was that second part? "Do you dislike the Great Older One? Is there something against you that he's done?"
Instantly, tentacles writhed behind his reflected self, and it recoiled, hissing between sharp teeth. "Something?! He's the reason I'm stuck in this glass! It was just one slight, I didn't harass, but his damn cultists decided I was being too crass! I hate him, I hate them, and I hope they collapse. But..." His reflection drooped, tentacles curling around his body like a blanket. "I can't do anything about it now. I'm at an impasse."
How strange. Howard had never imagined creatures like this could hold grudges against other creatures or their worshippers.
"That's wrong," he found himself saying. "You've done something today. You gave me the key, now I'll lock him away. He'll face the same fate that he imposed onto you, and you'll have the last laugh over those cultists, too."
His reflection didn't respond for a moment, but its eyes did lose their pupils. When it finally spoke, its voice was rather monotone. "Does it really mean all that much? You'll go ahead, save humanity and such, but I'll still be stuck on this wall, forever staring at the same drab halls."
Howard thought for a minute, turning the key over in his hand. Perhaps this was a bad idea, but... "Is there any way I can get you out? I'd reckon you've served your punishment for a single flout."
It gaped at him. "That's – what?" It shook its head, then leaned closer to the glass with a disturbing expression – but it was far from the most disturbing thing Howard had seen on the island, so he didn't react. "You are a fool. A fool, a buffoon," it spat. "You're as reckless as a bull, as loony as a loon! I insulted your mother, I dug at your heart, and now you're trying to offer me some kind of fresh start?!"
It paused, and the tentacles and disturbing expression faded. What was left was the same face Howard saw in the mirror all those days he tried to convince himself that it didn't really matter that Phil wasn't responding to any of his letters. If it had needed to breathe, Howard was sure it would have been heaving.
"I don't understand," it said, in a voice rather small. "I really, truly don't get it at all."
Howard took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He wanted to explain his full feelings to his reflection, but he didn't think he'd find the right words. Sure, Howard wouldn't be forgiving it for the things it had said any time soon, but he couldn't blame the thing for expecting him to die down here, and he really didn't have a moral leg to stand on when it came to lashing out at someone who responded to rudeness with kindness. Really, "dug out his heart" was kind of an overstatement. This mirror was just a nasty jerk at worst.
The worst part was the dig at his mother's death. Howard couldn't understand the purpose of that, and admittedly, it did hurt his heart. That said, while Howard wasn't going to just forgive and forget, he could handle an asshole's taunts.
Not like it would be the first time someone had mocked him about it.
Besides, if it had truly been stuck here alone to stew in its anger for who knows how long, then Howard couldn't blame him for being a little... how should he put this... sensitive? Eager to get a rise out of someone?
Instead of saying all that, Howard just held up the key. "Don't get me wrong, I still think you're rude. But you helped me greatly, so why shouldn't I help you?"
His reflection didn't meet his eyes. In fact, it leaned forward until its head met the glass with a thunk. Briefly, Howard had the thought that it was strange to see the top of his head like this, even if most of it was covered by a replica of his hat.
After what could have been a few heartbeats or several minutes, his reflection raised his head. His jaw was clenched, and suspicion still in its eyes, but it placed a hand against its side of the mirror. He met Howard's gaze as he said, "If you want me free, then pull me through. But be warned – I will forever be part of you."
How ominous. Despite the situation, Howard snorted. "Are you trying to match the cat in being vague during a serious chat?"
"Huh?" It squinted at him for a moment, then rolled its eyes. "I suppose Knowhere is the entity of which you speak? Unlike him, if you ask, I'll try to be less oblique.
"We would share a body and mind; I'd become a permanent part of your life."
Howard leaned back with some alarm. "Are you speaking of possession?"
A shrug. "Isn't that the question? I've never determined if that word's the best fit. I'd be in your body, but you wouldn't lose it. We would take turns in control, and converse through our thoughts. I'll want some time for myself, but I won't be your boss. I may be a jerk, but I'm fair, you should know." He smirked, showing off the sharp teeth he must have regrown at some point. "And you'll have some of my powers even if we're in a row."
Some of its powers... Howard glanced at the altars and statues in the room. He'd need all the help he could get for his upcoming fight with the Great Older One, but he still hesitated. "So, you admit we might fight at times? What happens if you're upset with someone in your own mind?"
The smirk loosened until it was barely a hint of a smile. "If two beings share a life, they must cooperate. I wouldn't cause you harm even if you're someone I hate.
"Besides, if I must, I can just block you off from me. I'll make my own place in your head you can't access or see. I'll cool myself off while you do the same." He paused, looking Howard over critically. "Assuming, of course, your temper's not aflame."
Howard's shoulders hunched. Of course a being that knew how his mother died would know about his temper... "I've learned my lesson from Knowhere already. I'll do better than I have in my history."
Then, Howard stiffened, as a thought occurred to him. "But does the same apply to you? Although I don't know how you knew, you knew just how my mother died, and used that to, what, injure my pride?!" By the end of his words, he was close to shouting; it was only the threat of catching the attention of any wandering dangers that kept his volume contained.
The mirror, for a minute, reflected only himself. The being was gone.
Howard was just about to turn away when his reflection changed. Between one blink and the next, it was back to the creature, who had a tentacle winding up its arm. It wasn't making eye contact, and it didn't have a hand held to the glass anymore.
"Sorry."
That was all it said for a few heartbeats.
Howard didn't say anything, either.
Eventually, the being looked up. "That was... insensitive of me," it said, although it sounded a bit unsure. "I... don't fully understand why I said those things."
It didn't finish the rhyme.
Howard sighed, slow and heavy.
"Okay."
What else was there for him to say? If only he could drag this being to Knowhere and have that cat unravel the being before him. Maybe conversation with Knowhere would be more fun when he wasn't having his past ruthlessly picked apart.
His mirror self waited for a minute, likely to see if Howard had anything else to say. When he didn't, it shrugged. "Anything else you need to ask or affirm?"
"... Should I be searching for hidden conditions or terms? Before, you seemed rather unsure whether to join me or not, so your willingness now makes me wary of some plot."
"Nothing like that." His reflection shook its head and smiled, though the smile had no warmth to it. "There's no tricks up my sleeves. I should know better than to anger someone who could let me leave," it ended in a grumble, lightly blushing.
A dig at itself. Hm. Howard leaned his head forward, listening closely to whatever it had to say next.
"I gave you more than enough reason to leave me behind, but you still made the offer. You still tried to be kind." The being had lost its pupils again, but it sounded a little confused. Then it refocused, with eyes like a beast's. "You knew all the words to the prayer, and spoke well. You don't back down even when I yell. You asked me good questions," it continued, and Howard blinked in surprise, "searching for intel.
"And you offer me vengeance," it finished with a grin. The fangs were back, Howard noted idly. "That's much better than being stuck in this cell."
Those all seemed like pretty odd reasons to make a deal with someone, especially when put together, but maybe it made more sense to an eldritch creature. That aside, there was just one thing that bothered Howard about all this.
"You know where I'm going, you know what I'll try. Aren't you certain that I'll fail and die? Why would you want to merge together with I?"
The tentacle that had been winding up his reflection's arm had by now reached his shoulder, and reached out just enough to poke his other self's cheek.
"You don't care if you die and rot," his reflection said, parroting his earlier words. "You're going to give it all that you've got. After everything you've shown me so far, I can't help but be curious about your upcoming spar.
"Also, if I want to leave here, this may be my last chance. After tonight, it's unlikely anyone will give me a glance," it finished bluntly, tentacle disappearing with its words.
Ah, that was something to consider, wasn't it? Whether Howard succeeded or failed, he certainly doubted anyone would be coming down here any time soon... except for Phillip.
At the thought of Phillip, his heart quickened, and he furrowed his brow. His friend had been through so much already, and was counting on Howard now. Maybe Howard would fail, maybe he would die, but he had to try. To make it up to his friend. To save his friend. To save Angelique, and Clayton, and all the humans and Beast Folk up above that just wanted to live.
Making a deal with this being could increase his chances of succeeding.
But... could he be sure it was telling the truth? Maybe it would kill him as soon as he gave it his hand. Maybe it wouldn't kill him, but would possess him, forcing him to watch as the world ended and everyone suffered.
For a moment, Howard looked down at the key in his hand. He didn't have to make a deal with some unpredictable shapeshifting creature just because it claimed this was the only way to help it escape from from its jail cell. He didn't have to give up sole ownership of his body and life to someone who would mock his mother's death just because it was lonely and had been treated unfairly. He could walk away right now and face the Great Older One as himself, alone. Did he really want to do this?
Howard caught his distorted reflection in the key's shine. Unlike his mirror self, this reflection was unquestionably him, down to the bruise on his cheek.
"What do you think of Phil?" he found himself asking.
"Phil?" his other self asked, sounding a little surprised.
Howard nodded, not taking his eyes off the key. When he spoke, it was careful, each word chosen to provoke. "Did you know he's hurt and killed? Do you wish him any ill?"
A heartbeat passed. Two. Three.
"I know only and exactly what you know," his reflection eventually said. "So, yes, I know he was affected by that stone.
"I know he hates what he has done. I know he's scared of what's begun.
"I know he wanted to make the world a better place. I know grief gripped him tight and put him in a state.
"I know he grinned as he rearranged guts. I know he regrets every action and cut.
"I know that I – we – you drove him away. I know he thought he'd die today.
"I know he's an amazing, wonderful friend."
Howard raised his head.
His other self had such a soft expression that, for a moment, Howard couldn't believe it was still some eldritch creature mimicking his face. One hand was gently pressed against the glass, while the other rested over its breast, and he was looking down, away from Howard – almost the picture of a man reminiscing on an old flight of fancy.
The colorful void behind him was now pitch black. It was just his other self and the glass.
"I know that for him, you would walk to your end," his other self whispered, and finally looked up to catch Howard's gaze. "I know he's your anchor, and that you care for him deeply.
"And..." It pushed off the glass, clasping both hands behind its back as it straightened, and never once breaking eye contact with Howard. "I know exactly why that is. Because I have your memories."
Howard nodded slowly. He'd suspected that was the case, that this wasn't supernatural insight or the like. He wanted to ask many questions about how it worked, but now wasn't the time, so he kept himself to just one: "Is that a power I will have, if I make this deal with you?"
His other self snorted. "No, that's the result of the mirror, to tell the truth. Changing form is more my style, but there are other powers you could trial."
Howard stepped closer to the mirror, making up for distance lost during their conversation. Now he stood where he had during their first exchange. "Any that could help me face the Great Older One?"
"Oh, dear Howard," he said with a grin, and Howard reflected it. "I'll make sure you have fun."
The being stretched out its hand, fingers pressing against the glass. Howard mirrored him, but held back right before their hands touched.
"Do you have a name?" he asked. "Something should set us apart if so much will be the same."
The being thought for a moment, one tentacle stretching up to tap on his chin. "I've forgotten my name, since it hasn't been used," it confessed. "But... perhaps you could make for me something brand new?"
There was hope in its voice.
"... You may be rude, but you're not all bad," Howard said in a low tone just above a whisper. "I won't forgive you, but I won't stay mad. You reflect what you see, including the past, and so my emotions are now yours to recast. And even if you think me a loon –"
The being's face flushed.
"... You've still offered me a very large boon.
"You, my dear, are a puzzle with pride, a shapeshifting creature with many strange sides. You may act aloof, but I can tell you value knowledge, and if I press an issue, my words you'll acknowledge."
Howard watched the being for a moment, waiting to see if his assessment so far was correct. Its head was tilted in curiosity, and the little tentacle by its chin curled, but there came no protests.
Something itched at Howard's brain. The chanting, and then the remarks about his determination and questions... He let out a little "Aha!" as he came to the answer. "You've been setting me tests! Do you do this with all your guests?"
"I haven't had guests in a very long time," his reflection answered dryly, lips twitching like he wanted to smirk. "But you're right that I prefer a keen mind."
"So, you're someone who will push others with a challenge or two," Howard said triumphantly. "You're insightful and want someone who can keep up with you."
With that, Howard paused. He hadn't moved his hand away or towards his other self during any of that, and his arm was starting to get sore. But there was one last thing he had to say, so he pointed right at his reflection's face.
"You mimic and mock and degraded a god." Howard annunciated every word cleanly, crisply. The being's eyes were locked onto him, and neither of them moved a muscle. "You're clever and don't seem to mind being odd. Your emotions get the better of you here and there, but you soon lose your intensity, and claim to be fair. A bird in a cage, you long for your freedom, but you're a bird with a grudge, and want revenge on those scum. You'd even work with a human like me to achieve either feat, even though you expect that I'll face defeat.
"So, come on, now, dear Corvus."
Without further ado, Howard reached just a little farther, hand passing through the glass that felt like water over his skin, and took his newest ally by the hand.
"We have a Great Older One to beat."
Howard pulled him through the mirror.