Chapter Text
It was a dark, dingy day. A mass of deep grey clouds pooled overhead the school, making for a particularly dim setting. Wind howled harshly, sharp blades of air cutting through the atmosphere. Atop the roof of the school sat a young figure, tightly clutching a slightly rusty pair of scissors in their hand. They were sobbing – quietly, as to not draw the attention of anyone who may intrude – but it was undoubtedly difficult to suppress their anguish to such a low volume. Heavy, pained breaths would separate each sob, and their eyes struggled to focus on the unsightly streaks of crimson tearing through their now limp arm.
“Why do I keep doing this… Well… Other than-...”
Eventually, they would have to make a move from their solitude on the rooftop to go on the trek to retrieve a first aid kit (without being spotted, of course – nobody could know what they had done to themselves) but that could wait. For now, they would simply live in their lonely thoughts of regret and sorrow, topped with an unhealthy dose of... Gender dysphoria.
But this state of solitude would soon be broken at the sound of the rooftop door unlatching, followed by an unfamiliar figure stepping through it. The student’s hands hastily positioned themselves over his mouth, guarding his breaths and sobs from being detected by the unexpected visitor. The visitor was another student – another boy, sporting short blond hair which faded to a peachy pink at its tips. His eyes, although they somewhat lacked that lively spark you’d hope to see in a young boy’s eyes, still shone a dazzling orange in spite of this. A flicker of sun peaked through the clouds and illuminated his face, causing him to appear even more radiant than he already was. His very appearance mirrored that of a star shining bright amongst the intense darkness of the night.
Despite his general wariness of strangers, the injured boy was immediately captivated by the visitor. He couldn’t give a reason why if asked. Perhaps it was that inherent radiance about the boy? It only made sense: such brightness would be naturally appealing to someone who had spent so long forced to hide away in the shadows, like a moth to a candlelight.
It didn’t take long for their eyes to meet, causing an audibly terrified breath to slip. The concern on the other boy’s face was evident immediately, and he didn’t waste any time in beelining for his distressed schoolmate’s side.
“Whatever happened, it’s okay. Let me, uhm… Help you. Take care of this.” The boy’s voice was kept to a gentle, low tone, portraying a kindness which the other was not well acquainted with anywhere other than home. He wasn’t entirely sure what to make of it.
“Should I really place such intimate trust in someone I’ve never met before…? He doesn’t appear to have bad intentions, however…”
Following a few lengthy seconds’ hesitation, he gave in and unconcealed the tragic state of his arm, instead tightly crossing his uninjured arm across his chest. The stranger crouches down to inspect the damage, furrowing his eyebrows at the sorry sight. His thumb ever-so-delicately rubs against one of the cuts, causing the other to flinch slightly at the small sting it makes, but he strangely found himself soothed by the gesture nonetheless. He really is not used to such tenderness being directed his way, huh.
“Ah, sorry, I didn’t mean to—”
“… No, it’s fine.” Damnit, his voice came out way too high pitched then.
The other boy lets out an exhale before getting back up onto his feet. “Wait right there, I’m going to get a first aid kit. I won’t be long, I promise!”
“Ah… He’s gone already.”
Things were back to being lonely. At least, until the boy made his return with the first aid kit, which could take a while: the nearest first aid room wasn’t exactly close by. Ultimately, though, it was a relief that the injured boy had been spared of the trip in such a state. It would not have been easy to avoid confrontation of any sort, which… Well, he didn’t want to think about all the connotations that come with such an encounter. Perhaps he should avoid letting his mind wander down that route. It hadn’t happened, so there was no reason to stress about it. Instead, he turned his attention to the fact someone was actually taking care of him – a complete stranger, at that. Someone who didn’t know him. Someone who didn’t know the kind of person he was.
“Why is he helping me…? What’s in it for him?”
“Would he still do this if he knew I was-…?”
“Why did he come to the rooftop in the first place?”
“I wonder what his life is like… Why were his eyes dimmed for a moment…? No, I shouldn’t pry into things like that…”
“I still don’t know if I should even be trusting him so much… He’s got to have an ulterior motive to be helping someone like me.”
“… Ah, I’m doing it again. I’ve really got to stop myself from overthinking everything, huh.”
There was that awful high-pitched voice he hated so much again. God, he should just stop talking. Preferably forever.
...
Staying true to his word, the boy did indeed make a quick return (at least, as quick as it could’ve been), quite clearly out of breath from running there and back. Not that he paid any mind to his breathless state. In the blink of an eye, he was back by his schoolmate’s side and already working on cleaning the numerous wounds scattered across his arm.
“Sorry if this stings. But…” The boy’s eyes flicker over to the rusty scissors now left discarded on the rooftop floor. “… It needs to be done, or you could easily get an infection. Especially considering you used those.”
It did indeed sting. The injured boy hated that sensation, and failed to prevent himself from flinching a few times. But he too knew it was a necessary pain. “It’s what I get for doing this to myself, I guess.” Shut up, thoughts.
As if sensing his peer’s inner turmoil, the other boy speaks up in an apparent attempt to lighten the mood somewhat. “… So! What’s your name?”
“…”
“… Kamishiro.” He hesitated for a moment. “Um… Rui.”
“Nice to meet you, Kamishiro! I’m Tenma Tsukasa.” Rui couldn’t help but notice that the cheerful tone of Tsukasa’s voice felt a little forced "How come?"
Silence fell upon the two once more, broken only by Rui’s strained breaths of pain at that sharp stinging sensation that flared up at every rub of disinfectant. It hurt. It hurt so much. He was very much regretting his prior actions now, but it was too late to change anything. He knew he would harbour these regrets, and yet he did it anyway. All for that short flicker of relief he’d get from each-
“… There! Disinfecting done. I’m going to bandage these up now.”
“… Okay.”
Thank goodness, it was over. Sort of. The sting still lingered, as if it was taunting Rui, remarking about how much of an idiot he was for doing this.
It wasn’t too long before the bandaging was done too. Tsukasa takes a step back with a sizeable grin on his face, admiring his handiwork. “All done! How is it? Not too tight or anything?”
Rui looks down at the bandages now decorating his arm. He twists his arm back and forth ever so carefully, checking for tightness and comfort. “… It’s… Fine.” A slight pause. “… Thank you.”
“It’s no problem! I just couldn’t do nothing upon seeing one of my peers in such a sorry state.”
“Hm…”
Once again, it grew silent. Neither of the boys seemed to know what to do, or say. Rui’s gaze falls down to his slightly grazed knees, and he fidgets with the hem of his skirt as he combats the army of thoughts swirling around his head. He still didn’t entirely know what to make of what had just transpired. Had he made a new friend? “No, don’t be so foolish. It never turns out that well.” But still, the closeness he felt with Tsukasa was undeniable. It had been such an intimate moment, to let him tend to his self-inflicted scars like that. In part, Rui couldn’t help feeling regretful of letting his guard down in such a way, but at the same time…
It was so nice. To have someone looking out for you. To have someone be kind to you. To have someone take care of you.
Perhaps… He wasn’t truly alone anymore.