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Bakugos in his room at 7 pm a bit early for his bed time. Most people in the dorms are still up and having fun but tonight Bakugo doesn't want to hang out. He lied and said that he had a migraine.
He opens his drawer and in it is a whittling knife that that his parents gave to him for his birthday when he said he wanted to take up whittling.
Bakugo pulls up his sleeve and stares for a moment, then he works up the courage to slice. At first nothing appears but then the red comes. Little red dots like pretty constellations appear.
"Shit that's deep" he mutters under his breath.
In a fixated craze he rapidly starts slicing up his arm as hard as he can. Blood drips onto the floor. He's only done cat scratches aka the dermis layer.
"Oh God I'm gonna be sick" he whimpers out
The great Bakugo? Whimpering on his damn floor like a whimp? He feels pathetic.
This is the deepest he's ever gone before as hes new to cutting himself.
And then.. Thats when his heart stops.
Someone knocks on the door.
"Hey Bro?"
Damn it it's kirishima.
"D-dont come in here!" he shouts as he tried to stop the bleeding with a rag. "I'm indecent!"
"Oh sorry bro, I was just wondering how the migraine was doing, I brought you some medicine!"
Stupid shitty hair and his kindness
"I don't need damn medicine leave me alone! "
"But Bakugo you know it'll only get worse if you-"
"FINE. Just leave it at the door I'll get it later."
"Alright! I hope you feel better soon!"
Bakugo hears Kirishima's footsteps slowly disappear. That was a close one.
"Now onto this bleeding problem.."
He grabs his first aid kit pulling out gauze. He presses it against the deepest wound, hissing when it stings to much.
After a few minutes as he resists the urge to look at the wound. Once the bleeding finally stops he runs to the bathroom. Running the cuts under warm water gently washing away any remnant blood. He gently dries the wounds and bandages them all carefully.
"This is going to be hell to hide"
The next day Bakugo is walking with Kirishima to the movie theater to see human earthworm two (something of course Kirishima would want to go watch) When suddenly Kirishima grabs bakugo's arm to show him something. He immediately flinches and rips his arm away in pain which freaks Kirishima out.
"Whats wrong man? I was just trying to show you the cool sign." Kirishima says worried.
"I'm fine I just got a... uhm a cramp" Bakugo stumbles out which is unusual for him
"Whatever you say man" Kirishima says worridly
When the reach the movie theater the don't talk about the incident any longer.
During the movie Kirishima intertwines his fingers with Bakugo's which they can't both help but blush. Bakugo squeezes Kirishima's hand tightly.
"Look at the pretty birch tree Bakugo." Kirishima whispers to him
After the movie the go into their respective dorms.
3 weeks pass and the cuts are all healed up, but if you rub on his skin faint white lines will appear.
He decides to switch to cutting up his thighs as to not let anyone find out he's cutting.
One night Bakugo alone in his room, Kirishima and Deku left his room earlier after playing Minecraft together.
Bakugo can't help but feel a wave of cold dread wash over him. The urges are coming back even stronger. But.. Hes scared? Bakugo and scared don't fit right in the same sentence. Hes able to fight anyone, scream and yell, and hes confident as hell but he can't handle a little cut?
Bakugo scrolls on his phone, he has a secret TikTok account just for sad angsty stuff to get him in the mood.
One post reads
"How I feel because I truly believe that nobody really likes having me around"
Another reads
"Do I need to commit to prove I'm genuinely struggling?"
Another shows a beautiful birch tree. Covered in it's black stripes symbolizing cutting yourself with Mitski playing in the background, Bakugo loved Mitski. How could such a beautiful tree symbolize something so horrid, so depressing?
The last one he scrolls on reads
"My dad didn't directly hit me as a child but I think the fact that I was scared of being hit anytime he was angry tells a lot about my childhood."
Bakugo could almost laugh at that post, his dad was a perfect dad, hed never raise his voice at Bakugo and people out there have it so much worse than him and hes sitting here on the ground in his room trying to get himself confident enough to cut. How pathetic, theres no reason for Bakugo to be this sad to cut himself.
Bakugo sighs and switches to YouTube, he turns on his angsty playlist which is mostly Mitski, he pulls on his headphones, her voice blasting in his ears.
This time during this cut session he goes pretty deep on his thighs, hitting styros. As he cuts it goes from white to red, blood drips down his thighs as he stares at those angry red lines.
Eventually he ends up cleaning the wounds with a rag, water, and bandaids.
Weeks pass and the cycle continues almost every night he cuts his thighs to show those lines like a birch tree.
But one day everything changes. He had a fight with his mom over the phone arguing about something utterly stupid and that was Bakugo breaking point.
He grabs that whittling knife and slices harder than he ever had before on his poor thighs hitting the hypodermis. Slicing over and over and over again.
Bakugo stares at the cuts with dullness in his eyes, he'd never cut this deep before but for some reason tonight he isnt nervous anymore.
Then suddenly Kirishima walks into his room with a Boquet of orange roses, Bakugo loved orange roses.
Kirishima let's out a blood curdling scream which makes Bakugo sick to his stomach he feels horrible that he made his sweet Kirishima scream like that.
Kirishima drops the roses and jumps on Bakugo wrestling with him to let go of the knife. Kirishima's hands get cut in the process which freaks Bakugo out even more. He needs to stop Kirishima from getting hurt more, this is all his fault.
Bakugo uses all of his strength to shove Kirishima off of him. Bakugo has enough time from kirishima's shock to grab the knife again.
In one swoop he slices his throat and collapses to the ground
"KATSUKI" Kirishima screams as he rushes to Bakugo pulling him into his lap.
"Please don't leave me!" Kirishima sobs out, tears dripping onto Bakugo's face.
"I'm sorry I'm sorry please don't cry over me.." Bakugo mutters out
Bakugo and Kirishima stand under a beautiful birch tree together.
"You know birch trees remind me of us" Kirishima says happily
"Hah? Why the hell do you say that??"
"Well they always come in at least pairs just like us right!" Kirishima shouts excitedly and wraps his arms around Bakugo.
"Whatever you say weirdo" Bakugo grumbles out with a smile
"We'll be together forever right!"
"Of course shitty hair I'm not leaving you to go do somethin stupid"
Bakugo's body falls limp in kirishima's arms.
Kirishima's beautiful birch tree has fallen..
