Chapter Text
A long time ago, there was a little girl named Lucy Heartfilia. As she grew up, her parents and servants also took to calling her Lucky. Lucky Lucy Heartfilia. A blonde, beautiful heiress who was one day destined to marry a prince. A young girl who would make her family proud. Her fate was practically written in the stars.
Then one day, Lucky Lucy’s fortune vanished.
It began with her mother. Although she now understood that her mother had sacrificed herself for the future and to defeat Acnologia, as a little girl she was unable to comprehend any of it. She didn’t know about mythical dragons, nor about the dire price that magic sometimes had. Lucy didn’t know why her mother had left her, nor why her father grew so cold. She had no idea that she wasn’t truly destined to marry a prince. She was merely to be sold off to ensure the family fortune.
Shortly after Layla Heartfilia’s death, Lucky Lucy lost her nickname. When her body began to change and her features grew rounder and her hips wider, she had a new nickname, if it could be called that: Miss Lucy Heartfilia. She was never to be referred to as anything but. Not at balls, not by her teachers, nor by any probable suitors who would arrive at her door carrying arrays of roses in each arm.
That was her life until the day she ran away at age sixteen. And then she was simply Lucy.
She continued like that for weeks. And slowly, those weeks turned into months, until she had begun to outgrow the traveling clothes she would hide in the bottom of her drawer at the Heartfilia estate. That was when she had firmly decided on a new style. Short. Low-cut. Everything her dad would’ve hated. If he were to see her, he would surely comment that she could never be wed. Not that she cared. Although she lamented the shattering of her fairy tale fantasy, she would rather be single for her entire life than forced to bear an heir for a father who couldn’t care less about her desires.
Although Lucy had escaped the restraints of her life as an heiress, she still felt like there was a hole left in her chest. It was a hole that had steadily been growing since the day her mother left, and one afternoon, approximately six months after she had left her estate, she realized what that strange feeling that she had always carried around with her was.
Loneliness.
Humans weren’t meant to be alone. And yet, for her entire life, that was the only reality Lucy Heartfilia knew. She had trouble envisioning a life without the pressing weight of expectations and solitude. But she dreamed. When she would see a gaggle of teenage girls on the street, grabbing ice cream from an outdoor vendor after a particularly grueling day of afternoon lessons. When she would see a child with both their mother and father, begging to be allowed to stay up past their curfew that night. When she would see a strange pair run into each other in the street, stopping to apologize for their own clumsiness, only to stare into each other’s eyes and realize they had found just what they had been missing.
She became nomadic. Lucy never liked to stay in one place for too long, fearful that her father would send out forces to retrieve her and force her back into a life of confinement. She went from city to city, occasionally picking up trinkets and, on the rare occasion, celestial keys. It was a great way to remember her adventures, even if those adventures were alone.
Until one day, she stumbled upon the port city of Hargeon. Upon arriving in the city, she saw a portrait of a girl she adored on the cover of Sorcerer Weekly. Mirajane. A wizard of the infamous Fairy Tail guild.
Lucy ended up staying for longer than she normally did in Hargeon. To this day, she still didn’t know what compelled her to. Maybe her subconscious had known that she would have a fateful encounter that day. She couldn’t quite say.
It started slowly. When she saw his swirling mess of pink locks and his knuckles that were callused from years of hard work and fights that were far too reckless for her taste, she hadn’t expected to form a friendship with him, much less a partnership. But that was what was so compelling about Natsu. Like a moth, she followed his flame. She undoubtedly would follow it to the ends of the earth.
Lucy still didn’t know exactly when she fell in love with Natsu.
Perhaps it was when he caught her falling from Phantom Lord’s tower. Maybe it was when he saved her from Kain. Or New Oración Seis. Or the Grand Magic Games. It could’ve been when he had left to train for a year and left her alone for the first time in their entire friendship and she realized she didn’t quite know how to exist without him anymore.
Or it could’ve been there from the very start. When he, a stranger, grabbed her hand with his rough and callused ones that were softer than she ever could’ve imagined. When he introduced her to his family and even allowed her to become one of them. When he, for the first time in her sixteen years of living, showed her what a friend was.
The truth is, Lucky Lucy was never destined to fall in love with the prince. Her fate wasn’t to live in a fancy castle and bear lots of heirs. She wasn’t meant to fit in stuffy dresses and attend balls that were far too expensive and outlandish.
In every fairy tale she had ever read, the dragon was always the villain. The princess never fell for them. They were meant to be sworn enemies. Forever.
And yet, against all reason, Lucy Heartfilia had fallen in love with a dragon.
Fiery red and yellow petals fell past her lips into the waiting toilet below. Tears fell down her cheeks as an explosion of color shot from her. The petals were soft—impossibly soft, just like those hands that always grabbed hers to drag her to new adventures.
If she didn’t know that they were killing her, she would think that it was almost beautiful that her love for Natsu had manifested in such a way as to produce new life from nothing. It was magic. And her mother had always said that the source of all magic is love.
Funny. Many years ago, she would look upon those words from her mother with joy. Now she could only feel disgust.
A flash of yellow light spawned next to her. Loke was at her side in an instant. Like he had grown used to doing, he grabbed her golden hair and held it away from her face as she spasmed. Another wave of petals fell from her lips. The red petals were stained darker. Her blood coated the soft leaves and her pursed lips. She waited for a moment, expecting another attack, but it had subsided—if only temporarily.
“I’m fine, Loke,” she whispered. The spirit watched her closely, his expression completely unreadable. He dropped her hair from its makeshift ponytail, but he didn’t move his hand. Instead, he proceeded to rub the halo of her head, his thumbs rubbing against her scalp in circles.
“Tell him,” he stated—no, begged. It was a familiar sentence. She had heard it from the beginning, since he had inevitably found out about her deadly love disease when he had felt her distress call from across the celestial gate. It was he who had told her what it was.
Hanahaki Disease. The flower disease. The disease of unrequited love. She had never heard of such a thing, and Loke had apparently never seen it in all of his millennia of life. It was a trip to Porlyusica that had confirmed that the disease was real, and Lucy, in all of her ‘luckiness’, was one of the rare humans afflicted with it.
“I can’t tell him,” she shot back at him. “You know what Porlyusica said. If he rejects me, I might die. Do you want that?”
Loke looked hurt at the very suggestion. “Of course I don’t, Lucy.” He pulled her closer until she was flat against his chest. “I can’t… I just can’t…”
She knew what he wanted to say. She felt it; his emotions faintly glowed from his key and into her heart. It was a call of pain. The same call that they felt from her every day.
“He loves you, Lucy. You’re the only one that doesn’t see that.”
Lucy pulled back. She looked away from him, her bangs shielding her eyes. “Go back, Leo.”
“Lucy, I—”
“Go back. Natsu’s coming to pick me up soon. He can’t know, Loke. If he figures it out, I’ll die.”
“You’ll die either way!” he insisted, grabbing onto her arms desperately. “If there’s a chance, even a small chance… I know you don’t want the surgery, Lucy. I would never force you to do that. But I can’t stand to watch you suffer anymore.”
“Then don’t,” she whispered. “Go back, Leo.”
Loke stared at Lucy for a long moment. “I’ll be here if you need me,” he said, and then he vanished in a burst of golden light. Lucy was left alone.
Quickly, she began disposing of the stray petals on her bathroom floor. She couldn’t do much to mask the smell, but Natsu had recently begun to have the assumption that she was on a floral kick. Though that didn’t stop him from the occasional complaint about her fragrance being much too strong for his sensitive nose, or the demands that she go back to her old, regular strawberry shampoo.
No sooner had she thrown away the last of the petals than she heard the telltale opening of her bedroom window. “Lucy?” she heard echo into the empty space of her bedroom. His sandaled feet dropped onto the floor. “Are you taking a bath?”
“N-No! I’ll be right out!” Grabbing her satchel from her counter, she threw it over her shoulder and bounded out of the restroom. Natsu was waiting for her, his eyebrows drawn together as his nose twitched. Happy was on his shoulder, mindlessly chewing a small tilapia. “I’m ready!”
Natsu stared at her for a moment. “You smell.”
She blanched. Quickly, she mustered any strength she could to school her expression into one that was vaguely offended. “Hey! What the hell do you mean by that?!”
Natsu stalked closer, his gaze intense. Slowly, he leaned forward and burrowed his nose into her hair, taking a long whiff. Her heart beat against her ribcage. When he pulled back, he was wearing a deep frown. “You smell like flowers again. And blood.”
“Uh… I… I’m…”
Happy whistled, leaning close to Natsu’s ear from upon his shoulder. The exceed lowered his voice in a feigned whisper. “Hey, hey, Natsu… You’re not supposed to smell a girl during her time of the month.”
Time of the month? What? “I’m not—!” Before she could continue, she quickly slapped a hand over her own mouth. What, was she stupid? This was the perfect excuse!
“Huh?” Natsu looked skeptically at Happy. “What d’ya mean?”
“Y’know… That time every month when Lucy gets all mopey and fat.”
… Fat? Her previous tension vanished in an instant, and she shot her hands forward to pull at the edges of Happy’s lips. “I’ll pluck out your whiskers and feed them to you, cat!”
“AHHHH! Natsu, help me! Lucy’s trying to kill me!”
As Happy floundered, Natsu ignored him and lifted his own hand to his chin in a pondering fashion. He nodded in satisfaction. “Oh, your period. That makes sense. Geez, Lucy—you really need to take a shower sometime.” He scrunched his nose. “And seriously, stop using that flower perfume. You smelled much better before.”
Lucy stopped pulling at Happy’s lips. She dropped her hands and twisted them in front of her as she looked away from Natsu. “Stop smelling me, seriously… It’s weird.”
Natsu shrugged, throwing his hands behind his head. “Whatever. Ready to go to the guild? I’m rearing for a new mission.”
Chuckling, she started towards the exit of her apartment. Natsu and Happy followed. “At least let me eat breakfast first.”
“Breakfast? I smelled food in your house.”
Damn his nose.
Lucy cringed, searching for an excuse. It would almost certainly lead to Happy making fun of her weight, but… “I’m hungry again. It didn’t fill me up.”
“Wow, Lucy… You’re really fattening up!”
Before she could turn around and shake her fist at the exceed and wish him nothing but the worst, Natsu beat her to it. “Quiet, Happy.”
Happy instantly deflated. “I was just joking…”
Ignoring his companion, Natsu stared at her curiously. “Are you sure you’re okay? I know Happy’s saying you’re fat, but you actually look skinnier than normal.”
Damn this man. Despite being the biggest idiot in the guild, Natsu could be observant when he wanted to. “I’m on a new diet. That’s why I’m hungry, actually! It’s all catching up to me.”
Natsu raised a skeptical eyebrow. “Diet? What kinda diet?”
Lucy bristled. “What’s with the fifth degree?! Are we going to the guild or not?”
Natsu stared at her for a moment longer. Then, without pausing, he walked past her, his arms behind his head as he bounced. “Whatever, weirdo. Let’s get you fed.”
The walk to the guild was spent mostly in silence, which is what Lucy preferred. The idea of further talking to the man of her affections made her lungs quake, and although she could explain away her scent with floral perfumes and menstrual cycles, she doubted that even he would be able to wave away coughing up flowers.
She let her hand fall to her keys. They were warm. Comforting. All of her spirits knew what she was going through, of course. They knew that she was dying. She hadn’t mentioned it, but the first order of business that Loke had done when he went back to the Celestial World after seeing Lucy’s suffering was to tell all of the rest of the spirits what she was going through. Now whenever she summoned them on a mission, they were oddly protective of her—more so than usual, at least. If Natsu had noticed, he hadn’t said anything.
A fleeting thought of a woman with blue hair and a mermaid’s tail crossed her mind. What would she say? She’d probably call me an idiot.
She waved that thought away.
Before long, they were at the entrance of the guild hall. It wasn’t as chaotic as it normally was. Most of the guild’s loudest troublemakers were on missions, and those that were left had either chosen to sleep in or were merely enjoying their breakfast in solitude or quiet conversations.
“Hey,” Natsu’s voice grabbed her attention. “What’dya want?”
“Huh? Oh, um…” She thought about it for a moment. “Pancakes? With blueberries, please. And coffee.”
Natsu nodded, stretching his arms far above his head as he shook off the morning grogginess. Instantly, Lucy’s gaze was drawn to his one exposed bicep. It flexed, and Lucy could count out how many different muscles were in his arm alone simply by the sheer volume of them. With the sun’s harsh rays now a staple of their everyday life with the passing of spring, his skin was also tanner than usual.
She must have been staring a touch too long, for she heard the telltale and familiar sound of Happy’s snickering from atop Natsu’s shoulder. Lucy instantly shot him a glare, and Natsu turned his curious gaze to his feline companion. “What’s up, Happy?” he asked.
Happy’s paws curled over his lips. “Lucy lov—!”
“Happy, if you don’t say anything, I’ll buy you the biggest fish you want for dinner.”
The exceed stopped speaking immediately. His eyes glittered with delight, like he had achieved exactly what he set out to do. “Any fish?”
“Any fish you want. I promise.”
“Aye!”
Lucy breathed a sigh of relief. Although Natsu would likely ignore whatever Happy had to say, she didn’t want to risk anything provoking that conversation. It was bad enough being in love with her best friend who had an unhealthy co-dependence on her whilst she suffered from a debilitating love disease, but actually talking about their feelings… That was out of the question.
The man in question simply proceeded to give the pair of them an odd look before giving an imperceptible shrug and striding towards the bar counter to order breakfast.
With the two of them outside of her immediate vicinity, she instantly felt all tension vanish from her body. As she looked across the guild hall to search for a place to sit, she saw a very pregnant Levy McGarden staring at her expectantly, gesturing for her to sit across from her at her booth in the corner of the guild.
With great trepidation, she walked towards the blue-haired girl, shooting Natsu a nervous glance as he talked to Mira. “H-Hey, Levy…” she started.
“Lulu!” Levy slapped the table, determined. Her eyebrows were furrowed, her lips pursed. It was a look that Lucy had become familiar with over the years—it was the very same one that she would shoot Freed’s ruins when she would be tasked with decrypting them, or when she would solve a difficult puzzle.
Lucy winced, sitting across from her. “Levy, be careful! The babies…”
“Don’t try to get out of this, Lu! What was that?”
Lucy raised an eyebrow, genuine confusion marring her features. “That?”
“Yeah, that! You were totally just checking out Natsu! Did you finally figure out your feelings?!”
When Lucy had reached Levy’s table, she had anticipated the possibility of being cross-examined. Whether it be about her sudden sick pallor, or her weight loss, or something completely inane, such as her thoughts on the latest book that they had read for their book club. She hadn’t thought that Levy would cross-examine her about her romantic inclinations for Natsu.
“W-What do you mean?”
Levy rolled her eyes, scoffing. She had become more feisty ever since falling pregnant. “Puh-lease. I saw how you were eyeing him up over there. I thought I was watching Happy eye up some fish for a second.”
She felt a warm heat reach her cheeks. Dropping her head, she whispered shrilly, “Levy! Keep your voice down! He’s a dragon slayer!”
Levy leaned back, satisfied. Her hands landed on her belly, rubbing it pleasantly. “So I was right?”
“N-No! Just—ugh!” Lucy gripped her knees tightly. Her fingers shook. “Even if I did like Natsu like that, he doesn’t feel the same way. I-I don’t even think he’s capable of something like that.”
The other girl squinted at her. “Really? When he was younger, he and Lisanna—”
“That’s not me, okay, Levy?” Lucy’s voice rose, and she immediately quieted and looked at Natsu. He hadn’t made any indication that he had heard her. He seemed rather engrossed in his and Mira’s conversation. She lowered her voice with her next words. “That’s not me. I don’t know anything about what he and Lisanna had, but I do know that our relationship is strictly platonic.”
“Really?” Levy looked at Natsu, who was now receiving Lucy’s pancakes. He turned towards her with a wide grin, looking for all his worth like he was having the best day of his life. Lucy couldn’t help but return his smile—it was contagious. When she thinks back to the first day that she met Natsu, his smile was the first thing that came to mind. It was warm, just like the fire that would encompass his palms as he fought his foes.
Natsu bounded over to her and Levy. Upon reaching the two of them, he deposited the breakfast in front of Lucy and sat next to her, waving absently to Levy. His arm stretched across the booth behind Lucy’s back, and the pads of his fingertips grazed Lucy’s arm. She shivered, her face heating up.
“Where’s your food?” she asked.
“Eh, didn’t get anything. Wasn’t hungry.”
Lucy looked at him doubtfully. “You weren’t hungry?”
Happy chirped next to him, “Natsu’s broke!”
Natsu actually looked annoyed at Happy’s quip. “‘m not broke…” he whined, dejected. “‘Sides, you need to eat. You’re all bone.”
Her heart skipped a beat. She felt a flush come over her face, and suddenly her vision began to blur. She distantly recalled Levy giving her a look that was clearly meant to convey I told you so before she bounded out of the booth. A cough bit at her, which she painfully bit down. She simply choked out one word, “Bathroom,” before she was flying towards the nearest facility.
When she entered the bathroom, she immediately slammed it closed. She turned on the faucet, and with the sound of the water rushing in her ears she fell to her knees in front of the toilet bowl and puked. Vibrant red and yellow petals fell from her lips, stained with such a deep shade of blood that it appeared almost black.
“Ah…” she breathed. “Ah…” She rested her forehead on the toilet bowl. For a brief moment, it appeared that she was in the clear. Then she remembered. She remembered his smile as bright as the sun. She remembered his care for her—even spending his last jewel for her. She remembered every time he saved her, every time he held her, every time she’d wake up to find him in her bed…
The spasms in her lungs grew and she lurched over the toilet bowl. A pained groan erupted from her as torrents of petals fell, only growing in intensity with every second that passed. Tears streamed down her cheeks, and she wondered for a brief moment if this would finally be the attack that killed her.
Then it stopped.
She fell backwards, landing on her hands as she backed away from the crime scene. The petals were overflowing in the toilet bowl. They fluttered to the ground peacefully, as though oblivious to the havoc they caused. The thick stench of flowers hit her nostrils.
It’s funny. When she had first begun to have the attacks, out of a sense of morbid curiosity she had called Crux to get his input upon what the flowers may be. He had said they were torch lilies. Fitting, she supposed—though it was clearly the gods’ idea of a joke to make the representation of Lucy’s love for the fire dragon-slayer something called a torch lily.
She breathed harshly, loud pants filling the small bathroom as she reoriented herself with the world. That was loud. Any moment, Natsu will—
“Love rival?”
The celestial wizard froze. No… No, that’s not Natsu. That’s—
“Are you okay? Juvia was passing by the bathroom when she… she’s coming in.”
“No!” Lucy cried unwittingly. “Don’t—!”
It was too late. Juvia opened the door to the bathroom, which in her rush Lucy had foolishly forgotten to lock. She stepped into the threshold and immediately froze. Her cerulean eyes widened, her lips falling open in a round o. It was a second before Juvia found her voice, and by then the telltale sound of Natsu’s sandals hitting the wood panels of the guild hall echoed in the hallway.
Juvia instinctively began to close the door and turned to face it, slipping her own head through the crack in the doorway.
“Lucy!” she heard Natsu cry. Her heart ached. She lifted a hand to her mouth as she choked, a few stray petals falling from her lips. “Out of my way,” he growled. Juvia didn’t relent. “Goddamn it! I heard her, Juvia! I smell her! She’s in pain. Get out of my way!”
“Love rival requests privacy,” the other girl merely replied. Lucy had to hand it to Juvia—she was a terrific actress. “She does not wish to see anyone right now.”
“That’s bullshit! I need to—!”
“I’m fine, Natsu,” Lucy called, attempting to calm her shakiness. “Juvia’s helping me with something. I’m fine. I’ll be out in a few minutes.”
“Lucy…”
“C’mon, Natsu,” she heard Happy’s voice. It wasn’t as jovial as it normally was. “Lucy would tell us if something was wrong. She’s our friend.”
There was a long moment of silence. For a moment, Lucy worried that he would forgo all of their words of reassurance to tear down the door himself just to see for himself that Lucy wasn’t actively dying. But to her utmost surprise, he merely muttered, “... Okay. You better be out here in five minutes. Your food’s gettin’ cold.”
She let out a soft chuckle. “... I will.”
His retreating footsteps echoed in the hall. As soon as he was gone, Juvia slowly shut the door and locked it. She cast a glance over her shoulder to look at Lucy. Slowly, her gaze traveled to the petals piled in her lap and then to the numerous other ones surrounding her.
Juvia opened her lips. Lucy immediately raised her palm at her, her hand quivering. “Don’t,” she simply said. Juvia merely nodded, and then she went to the sink to turn off the faucet. She then reached under the cupboard to take out a trash bag and a dust pan. Juvia fell beside Lucy, and without a word, she began to sweep up the petals and deposit them into the trash bag.
“H-Hey… You don’t have to—!”
“Don’t,” Juvia parroted ruefully. She smiled at Lucy, the edges of her lips tight. “Juvia and Lucy are friends. Juvia doesn’t want to see Lucy suffer.”
Lucy fell silent. Her heartbeat slowed. Her eyes felt misty, and she slapped a hand against her lips to stifle the sob that threatened to break free.
“Juvia knows this disease. Hanahaki. The love disease. Juvia had read about it a few times before.” She frowned, looking towards the door she had just locked. “It’s Natsu, isn’t it? Lucy loves him.”
Startled at Juvia’s bold declaration, she stammered, “I… I don’t know what you—”
“It’s obvious,” Juvia murmured. “The way Lucy looks at Natsu… It is as if he is the only thing she sees.” She smiled softly, laying a hand upon Lucy’s shoulder. She pulled her forward until finally Lucy was enveloped in a hug. Despite Juvia’s magic being that she could control water, she was warm—almost as warm as Natsu. “Juvia understands. It is the same love that Juvia feels for her beloved. She is sorry… She is sorry that fate is being so cruel to you.”
A gasp escaped Lucy. Cautiously, she lifted her fingers to Juvia’s blue jacket, tugging at it. “I… I don’t…”
“Lucy… Juvia is here for you. She will help you.”
It was in that moment that something within Lucy broke. She didn’t quite know if it was the fact that her burdensome secret had finally been freed from her, or that it was Juvia that was passing along this affection toward her, or if the weight of her horrid disease had finally caught up to her. But she began to cry. She cried so hard, and yet so softly, afraid that Natsu would overhear her once again and bang on the door until it flew off the hinges.
“I’m scared,” she whispered. “I don’t want to…”
Juvia was silent, but her firm grip that suddenly grew tighter told Lucy everything she needed to know.
Lucy stayed in that bathroom for far longer than five minutes. Surprisingly, Natsu never returned to get her. When she finally arrived back at the booth, he greeted her with that same warm smile he always did, and when she slid next to him, he deposited her pancakes in front of her, insisting that he had warmed them up again in her absence.
For all of Lucy’s fascination with Natsu, she failed to notice the haunted look he threw her way as she stuffed her face full of much-needed sustenance. She didn’t notice that his posture was more rigid since her return, and she didn’t notice that he failed to wrap her in his arms again like he was wont to do.
Unfortunately, despite all of her friends’ differing opinions, she knew that Natsu didn’t think of her like that. And although it was painful, and although she’d probably die if she didn’t find a suitable cure fast enough, that frightened her less than the thought of losing him forever.
And it was as Porlyusica said. If she did confess and he rejected her love, there was a high likelihood that she would die. If she was going to die either way… She’d rather do so loving him.
Lucky Lucy had never known love growing up. She had thought that feeling that she had read about in books and fairy tales was only for a lucky few. Although she dreamt of one day finding a prince, she knew that the reality of such a fate befalling her was next to zero.
Lucy looked to her left, only to find Natsu watching her astutely. He smiled. “Are you enjoying your food?”
She swallowed down the lump in her throat. She wasn’t, really. She hadn’t really enjoyed food since the flowers had ripped out all sensation from her throat and mouth. “I am,” she lied.
Natsu's gaze softened. “I’m glad.” Softly, he took her hand in his, giving it a reassuring squeeze. And this time, as she thought back to the first time he grabbed her hand to drag her towards an unknown future, she didn’t feel the flowers.
Lucy didn’t know how much longer she’d be able to exist beside Natsu. One day, when he found her unresponsive beside a mountain of petals, he might even grow to hate her.
For the current moment, she’d enjoy her fairy tale.