Work Text:
Jihoon had wandered into the garden looking for fresh air after escaping the lively party. A party that he sneaked into himself to gather intel nonetheless. The mask had been helpful, making him blend in without the Park family noticing his presence.
The Han family was curious on why the Park family would suddenly hold a party and decided to send Jihoon and a few guards to infiltrate and gather information.
Jihoon sighed as he walked along the path. In the end, he’d just be nothing but a pawn for his family’s struggle for power against the Parks. The course of his life was already determined the moment he was brought into this world.
At least, that’s what he thought until he saw a young man sitting alone, staring into the open sea. He sat next to the young man, both of them still wearing their mask.
“Fresh air?” Jihoon started the small talk.
The young man nodded before continuing to gaze into the distance.
The man looked familiar, but Jihoon couldn’t pin point why he does. His frame looked delicate, much like a girl if not for his attire and short hair. “Why are you out here alone? Don’t you have a partner or something?”
“No, and I sure hope my parents don’t manage to find me one by the end of that party.”
Then something clicked in Jihoon’s brain.
“You’re Park Hanjin, aren’t you?” Jihoon’s body suddenly tensed up as he realized. The man sitting next to him is an enemy, but he couldn’t let him know about his own identity.
He never fought with Hanjin, only his two brothers. He heard about the rumors, that Hanjin is the black sheep of his family that refused to uphold the family's honor. But he still knew that the Park family can't be good news.
“Is it that obvious?” Hanjin laughed bitterly. He takes off his own mask before breathing a sigh of relief. “You know, you’re not that good at hiding your identity either, Han Jihoon-ssi.” His hand moved to try and take off Jihoon’s mask, but gets immediately swatted away.
“Just pretend I’m not here,” his voice was stern, “unless you plan on telling the guards how we intruded your family’s party.” His gaze was sharp as he stared at Hanjin.
“I won’t, don’t worry about that.” Hanjin smiled as he looked away, continuing to stare into the horizon. “There’s so many beautiful things out there, don’t you think? The star, the sea. I think it would be nice if there’s more peace between our families.”
For once, Jihoon had to agree. He had grown tired of the war and bloodshed happening. Something about Hanjin was pulling him closer, but he wasn’t sure what.
“My family is hoping to gain one of the minister’s trust,” Hanjin spoke in a lower, more commanding voice. “If they succeed, then most likely they’ll set me up with their daughter and use that connection to get rid of your family.”
Jihoon was slightly taken aback by Hanjin’s demeanor. He was so calm just seconds ago, and now he’s speaking with such a serious tone. “And you’re telling me this, why…?”
“Because I hope your family can fail the plan for me,” Hanjin continued. “It’d be beneficial to your family, and me.” He gave a small smirk before softening his expression and looked up at the stars.
Jihoon scoffed, “As if I’d help you.”
This was all the answer he needed. This was what he came to this waste of time party for. Yet, he can’t help but continue to talk to Hanjin, as if he was under some sort of spell. He was mesmerized with how beautiful the moonlight bathed Hanjin’s figure. He finally found someone he felt like shared his thoughts. They talked into the night, and only stopped once they heard some sort of movement coming near them.
Hanjin quickly put on his mask before standing up and excusing himself.
“Um, sir! Are we ready to head back now? Who were you talking with?” one of the guards that came with him asked. He tried to figure out the person who was talking to their young master, but Jihoon immediately stopped them.
“No one important,” Jihoon spoke as he looked at Hanjin slowly disappearing into the garden. “The Parks are planning to gain a minister’s trust via this party to crush our family’s power to dust. We must inform my parents.”
All the men immediately tensed up when they heard the information. They all quickly decided to head back and inform the family about this news.
Jihoon glanced back, hoping to see Hanjin once more before leaving. He was unsure why, but he felt a twinge of sadness when he saw no one behind him.
“Hanjin, do you believe in past lives?” Jihoon asked curiously. He looked up from his phone to meet Hanjin’s eyes.
The sunlight filtered in through the window, casting a nice ray of light that bounced off the white walls. The beeping of the heart monitor was a constant noise that accompanied them both. It was a nice private room that Hanjin’s parents had paid for after hearing he fainted.
Hanjin giggled as he took another bite out of his spoon. “What are you reading anyways?” he asked while trying to take a peak at Jihoon’s phone.
“It just feels like, we’ve known each other for so long now,” Jihoon shyly answered, his head went back down to look at his phone. “Like we knew each other even before we met, you know?”
“But we’ve known each other for five years now? I think that’s pretty long considering we’re now in college,” Hanjin giggled. He slowly lifted up a bowl and drank the vegetable soup given to him.
“…I wish you can come back to class," Jihoon sighed. He turns off his phone to look at Hanjin. His skin was pale and he looked as if he’d get knocked down if a gust of wind blew too hard. The tubes running out of Hanjin’s left hand was constantly flowing with fluid. “Everyone misses you.”
“I miss everyone too…” Hanjin laughed bitterly. His eyes had a tinge of sadness in it. Hanjin places the empty bowl on the table before he asked Jihoon to help move it away.
No one really expected that the bright, always smiling Hanjin, would suddenly collapse in the middle of class after coughing up blood. The doctor said that a non cancerous tumor had grown in his lungs and that's what caused the internal bleeding. they were fortunate enough to have caught it early on.
“The doctor said they need to monitor me for another week to make sure the tumor could be safely removed,” Hanjin gave a soft smile to Jihoon. “Send me the notes okay? I’ll try to be back before finals.”
“Yeah, just focus on getting healthier first.”
“Please, I’ll do anything! Don’t take him away from me, please—I’m begging you!”
The dark ghostly figure turned around, holding a glowing white orb in his hands. His gaze stone cold, staring down Jihoon.
Jihoon holds Hanjin’s body closer, tears streamed down his face as he stares at his blood stained trembling hands. Hanjin’s smile is still beautiful despite the blood and dried tears on his cheeks.
“I’ll pay, any price. Whatever it takes. Please give him back, it’s not his fault…” Jihoon looks up meeting the reaper’s eyes. “Take my life instead if you have to!”
The dark figure shook his head slowly before he took a step forward.
“I’m afraid he is punished to forever wander the earth and die with regret in his heart,” the reaper solemnly explained.
Jihoon’s body went cold once he heard the words ‘punished forever’. He hugged Hanjin's body harder, hoping that Hanjin can just wake up if he shared his body heat.
“no no no please—” Jihoon’s voice was frantic. “His family drove him to make this decision, you can’t punish him for that!” his voice was louder, angrier. He stared at the figure with a sharp glare. He couldn’t accept the fact that Hanjin had died because of him. Died choosing Jihoon over his own life.
“Can I meet him again someday?” Jihoon spoke as he looked back at Hanjin's face, his expression became softer. “Can i meet him after hundreds of years, and still be with him even if he has to die.” Tears started pouring out of his eyes once again, clutching Hanjin's hands. “I want to be there with him, so I can say goodbye.”
“I can’t guarantee that if you die before your determined date,” the reaper spoke. His voice was monotone and void of any feeling, but Jihoon felt grateful as he heard those words.
“Then wait for me, Hanjin. I’ll see you again one day.”
“Jihoon-ah, stop looking so sad,” Hanjin pulled on Jihoon's left hand and clasped their hands together. It was warm and soft. Jihoon places his right hand on top of Hanjin's. “What’s wrong?”
“I had a dream that you died. It scared me so much, I didn't know what to do when I woke up…” Jihoon's eyes were filled with unexplainable sadness. He knew it wasn't real, the scene was far too horrific and foreign to be real. But something in his heart felt like it was real. “You were so cold… I genuinely thought I was holding an actual dead person before I woke up,” Jihoon forced out a laugh.
“Well the doctors said I'd be losing a part of my lungs, but it should be fine,” Hanjin chuckled trying to ease the tension with morbid humor. “I won't die, I'm gonna graduate with all of you, okay? Just wait for me.”
“Yeah, get well soon, Hanjinnie.”
“Jihoon-ah. Let's run away.”
Jihoon's eyes widen in surprise. He looks at Hanjin, still staring off into the distant sea. The way an orange glow bathed Hanjin was mesmerizing to him. He was beautiful.
“What about your family? Or that minister’s daughter?” Jihoon asked. “Our families aren't necessarily friends, you know. They hate each other.” His voice was small. He knew that they were already breaking so many rules just to be together like this.
“What about them?” Hanjin spoke, not intending on giving a care in the world about what happens to those people. “It's just gonna be you and me together.” He reached out to hold Jihoon's hand that's resting on the balcony. They stood there, watching the rest of the sunset in silence.
Hanjin suddenly moved closer to Jihoon. As Jihoon looked over to Hanjin, he was suddenly kissed on the lips. Jihoon stood there surprised as he melt into the kiss. The both of them held each other until Hanjin pulled away and giggled.
“I love you, Jihoon.”
“I love you too, Hanjin.”
The both of them folded origami cranes in silence. The only noise accompanying them is the beeping monitor that never ceased to stop and the busy noise from nurses moving outside the room.
“Jihoon, I'm a bit scared for tomorrow,” Hanjin laughed nervously. His hands trembled just a little as he folded the paper cranes he suggested they do. He had been the one convincing Jihoon to not worry just a few days ago, yet now he's the one afraid. “They said it might take at least 3 months before I can be discharged.”
Jihoon nodded without saying a word. He didn't know what he could even say to ease the situation. He's not the one who's going to be cut open on an operating table, so he felt like he couldn't necessarily offer any words of advice.
“Jihoon, have you kissed anyone before?”
The question caught Jihoon off guard. He looks up at Hanjin who's still looking intently at the origami as his hand moved to fold the wings.
“My parents and sister, I guess… why?” Jihoon answered jokingly. “I never kissed anyone before honestly.”
“Can you give me a kiss then?” Hanjin smiled as he looked at Jihoon.
The younger's ears turned pinkish as he heard the request. His hands stopped working on the paper as he looked at Hanjin who is laughing while watching Jihoon looking so embarrassed.
“I-it's supposed to be from someone special! You can't just ask random people to kiss you!” Jihoon's tone unconsciously went up an octave.
“Well I think you're really special to me. I think I really like you Jihoon-ah,” Hanjin giggled as he rested his head on the wall behind him, still looking at Jihoon.
Jihoon was at a lost for words. He didn't expect Hanjin to say ‘I like you’ so suddenly. He had started to feel like he developed something a bit more than just friends with Hanjin, but the way Hanjin just announced it like that was still surprising. He stuttered trying to think of a response as his ears and cheeks turned redder every second.
“I-I like you too… But that was so out of nowhere…” He hid his face in his hands, feeling his whole face burning up from the sudden confession.
“Can I get just a quick kiss then?” Hanjin spoke with a cute tone as he tries to pry off Jihoon's fingers from his face. He giggled as Jihoon squealed in embarrassment trying to process the barrage of information that he just received from Hanjin.
“Fine…” Jihoon mumbled as he gathered the courage. He stood up and leaned in closer to Hanjin. His heart was pounding so hard he felt it would burst out of his chest. He closed his eyes and gave a quick peck on Hanjin’s lips before melting to the floor in embarrassment, squealing like a dying animal in the process.
Hanjin sat there in complete shock, but the way his heart monitor beeped faster alerted the nurse in charge of him as she bursts through the door. She looks at Jihoon on the floor mumbling nonsense and at Hanjin just cupping his face getting warmer, still looking dazed.
“Excuse me, did something happen?” she asked with confusion.
“Oh, umm.. No, our other friend just did something really stupid and we found out via text. Don’t worry about us.”
The nurse gave a concerned look before going over to check Hanjin’s monitor and medicine. After making sure nothing was out of the ordinary, she excused herself and went back to continue her duty. She also reminded Jihoon that visiting hours are almost over and to head back home before closing the door.
Jihoon crawled back to his chair and stared down at his feet, face still flushed and giggling like a maniac every few seconds. “So, like… Are we, boyfriends now or something?” he asked sheepishly.
Hanjin giggled before leaning his body as close as he could to Jihoon. “Sure, if you wanna call it that.”
Jihoon’s face turned red again within seconds and he goes back to covering his face with his hands as he continues to laugh.
“STOP! YOU’RE HURTING HIM!” Hanjin screamed as his body was forcefully pulled back. He struggled to let go of his brother’s grip, but he felt as if his bones were getting crushed the more he tried to pull away. “LEAVE HIM OUT OF THIS, IT WAS MY IDEA!”
His brother yanked Hanjin’s hand harder as he spoke, “He corrupted you. Now look at you, desperately protecting him,” he scowled with face full of disgust.
“Those Han dogs should have kept their own kind under wraps,” his second brother chimed in. He pushed his foot down on Jihoon’s head as if forcing Jihoon to bow to him before giving him a swift kick on the head. He and the guards laughed as Jihoon spat a mouthful of blood and could only accept the beating. His torso was black and blue from the kicks directed at his chest, and his head was pounding after the kick. “This is their so called ‘strongest fighter’? Someone who goes down so easily just because he’s in love with our brother?”
“STO—PMMH!” A hand flew to cover his mouth, stopping him from screaming. His hands desperately tried to claw off his brother’s hands. His head was locked in place, forcing him to watch as his brother kept punching and kicking Jihoon’s body. Tears started forming as watches Jihoon being held down and not fighting back.
“You like him so much? Then go look at him being beaten up because of you before saying goodbye.”
Hanjin’s hand went down to his belt and pulled out a small dagger he had hidden on himself. He quickly slashed his brother’s arm and broke free from the hold. As his brother fell down clutching his arm and screaming, he ran as fast as he could to Jihoon.
His other brother hearing the scream immediately, turned around and pointed his sword at Jihoon. “Take another step, and I’ll kill him right here, right now,” he threatened. He smirked as he saw Hanjin immediately stopping.
Jihoon coughed out another mouthful of blood as he tried to speak. “Hanjin, just forget about me,” he lifted his head, doing his best to meet Hanjin’s eyes. “Just treat me like I never existed in your life and go back to the life you should have been living.” Tears welled up in the corner of his eyes as he said those painful words.
His brother signaled the guards to let go of Jihoon’s arms.
Jihoon fell forward with a loud thud as his body collapsed from exhaustion. His knees bruised from being forced down on the ground and the rest of his body aching from being punched and kicked. His breathing was ragged, paired with his head throbbing because of the kick made it hard for him to focus on anything.
“JIHOON—” Hanjin tried stepping forward, but his brother immediately placed his sword right on top of Jihoon’s neck. He could only clutch the bloody dagger in his hand as he seethed in anger.
“You heard him, go back and forget him,” his brother mocked. Hanjin’s first brother finally came over, still clutching his bleeding arm as his heavy steps filled with anger could be heard getting closer.
Hanjin sensing the danger quickly stepped back. His eyes darted from Jihoon’s broken body, to his brothers and guards. Then he does the only thing he can think of.
He places the dagger on the side of his neck.
Both his brother’s expressions dropped, and the guards all immediately looked worried with the sudden turn of events. Jihoon’s eyes widen in fear as he saw the determination in Hanjin’s face.
“I’d rather die than go back,” Hanjin hissed. His eyes darkened as he pressed the knife deeper into his neck. Blood started beading on the knife as the skin broke, but Hanjin didn’t pull back.
“Now, Hanjin… Let’s not do anything stupid, okay?” his brother spoke as he slowly stepped forward. “Their family is our enemy, we’ve been fighting to protect our power for more than fifty years now!” He dropped his sword to the side, hoping Hanjin would accept it as a peace offering.
Hanjin instinctively took a step back, pushing the blade deeper. He winced in pain, but he doesn’t put down the dagger. “Leave us alone. We’re nothing like you animals, killing innocent people for power,” Hanjin spoke in a low voice. Blood started dripping down onto his shirt, dyeing it a crimson red.
Jihoon struggled to sit up, feeling like thousand little blades are stabbing into his body as he forced himself to look up at Hanjin. “No… please Hanjin just treat me like I never existed, please…” he begged. “Forget about me, go back to your family and just forget about me!”
Hanjin’s second brother immediately laughed, his fingers pointed at Jihoon. “See! Even he gets it!” His first brother looked at Jihoon and smiled before saying “Smart dog. Should have been smarter since the beginning.”
Hanjin’s heart started beating faster. He couldn’t accept the fact that Jihoon would let himself get beaten up and humiliated like that just to make his family happier. His grip on the dagger started to loosen as he looked at Jihoon’s pleading eyes. But his brother’s voice snapped him back to his senses.
“Let’s go back, Hanjin-ah. Everyone’s worried sick about you,” his brother spoke. His voice was gentle as if laced with honey, but Hanjin knew better than to listen to those words. “Just forget about him and live happily.”
A sudden eerie calm washed over Hanjin.
The word ‘happily’ no longer held any meaning to him at that moment. He and Jihoon will no longer live happily after this. His source of joy in this cruel and power driven world was forcefully ripped away from him. He and Jihoon will forever live as puppets under everyone’s power, and they’ll forever live miserably following everyone’s orders.
So he smiled as he looked at everyone around him, his grip on the dagger firm.
"Over my dead body.”
“Kid, it’s two in the morning. You can’t just barge in here outside of visiting hours!” The security stood firmly in front of him
“I don’t care visiting hours are over, my friend needs me right now!” Jihoon screamed as a nurse and security guard blocks his path. They both try to calm him down and prevent him from waking up the other patients as Jihoon continues to argue with them. They were only stopped when a nurse quickly ran over to them.
“Are you the guest that always visits the patient from room 512?”
It didn’t take long for the staff to realize Hanjin was in distress when his machine started beeping wildly. They opened the door to see Hanjin trying to rip out the infusion from his hands.
Two nurses try to calm him down as he heaved and sobbed uncontrollably. He had immediately called Jihoon as soon as he woke up, but all he could say in between incoherent sobs the moment Jihoon picked up was “please come” before the nurses took away his phone and started going through a list.
Jihoon stood outside the room as he watched Hanjin hyperventilate, the nurses both trying to check on his condition making sure it wasn’t some sort of sudden complications before the surgery. He pushes the door and steps inside.
“Excuse me, please wait outside—”
“NO!” Hanjin immediately screamed. “Please stay… Jihoon don’t go, please…” His heart rate immediately went down significantly, and the nurses decided to let Jihoon stay inside.
Jihoon filled out the guest form in the room as the nurses make a final check on Hanjin’s condition. He occasionally glanced at Hanjin who’s just sitting there—back against the headboard and wall—waiting for the nurses to leave. He wasn’t sure why Hanjin had suddenly called him, but the moment he heard Hanjin’s voice, he immediately ran out the door and got in the first taxi he could find.
“It seems like there’s nothing wrong, so your surgery for tomorrow should still be on schedule,” the nurse’s response was mechanic. Hanjin only nodded as he looked at his left hand. They had reattached the infusion back to his hand, and Hanjin sighs, finally looking at Jihoon.
He waited fully until the nurses left carrying Jihoon’s form before he starts tearing up.
Jihoon immediately grabs the tissue from the bedside table and slowly dabs Hanjin’s eyes, but Hanjin started crying harder instead. He forcefully pulled Jihoon into a hug, and Jihoon was taken aback with the sudden pull. He carefully wrapped his arms around Hanjin, and they stayed like that.
“I’m scared… Jihoon I’m scared… I don’t know what to do…” Hanjin whispered as he continued to cry. “I’m scared I won’t see you again after this…”
Jihoon rubbed Hanjin’s back as Hanjin buried his face deeper onto Jihoon’s body, soaking his jacket. “I’m gonna be here until the operation finishes, okay?”
Hanjin only sobbed louder as his hug tightened. “I don’t want to die, Jihoon… I don't want to lose you,” Hanjin whispered in between sobs.
Jihoon’s felt like his body became heavier as he heard those words. The image of Hanjin from his dreams dying in his arms, feeling so lifeless and cold snapped something in him.
“Don’t say that!” Jihoon immediately pulled Hanjin by the shoulders, forcing Hanjin to look him in the eye. The way Hanjin’s eyes was red and swollen, his face filled with genuine fear with tears still streaming down his face, broke something in Jihoon.
“You’re not going to die! You’re going to take that finals, you’re going to graduate with all of us, and you’re going to go out with me on a proper date after this!”
Hanjin was stunned. His eyes widened in surprise and he couldn’t help but laugh out loud when he heard the last line.
Jihoon smiled as he sees Hanjin finally laughing, smiling. A heavy feeling still sunk into his stomach, but he forces himself to smile at Hanjin before hugging him again.
“I love you, Hanjin.”
“I love you too, Jihoon.”
“Have you not embarrassed us enough?!” Jihoon’s father stepped forward, ready to slap Jihoon. His voice boomed throughout the entire room and hallway.
Jihoon braced himself to receive the slap, but his mother and a few guards immediately pulled his father back. He's still sore and aching with a few broken ribs and a badly bruised body. Another slap would amount to nothing compared to the pain in his heart.
He had the bloody dagger in his hands. He was ready to end his life and follow Hanjin, but a sudden dark figure approached him to tell him that following Hanjin would just guarantee they’ll never see each other ever again. He thought he was hallucinating from the pain.
In the end, he chose to continue living with the promise of seeing Hanjin again someday. Even if they became strangers once again, he wants to at least be next to Hanjin when he eventually drew his last breath.
But right now, he’s faced with his father cursing him out after they found out why Jihoon ended up the way he was—falling in love with the enemy’s son.
“HE’S DEAD ALREADY, WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?!” Jihoon screamed as he stood up. Everyone stood there in shock, and the room became so silent you could hear a pin drop.
His mother quickly used the moment to push his father out the door before locking it, leaving only her and Jihoon in that room. She sighed as she pulls a chair closer to her son and sat next to him. Jihoon could only sit back down slowly, the feeling of the kick on his ribs was still digging into him.
“What’s done is done. You can't turn back time and change anything anymore,” his mother comforted him.
“I wish I could have done something more…”
Hanjin slowly opens his eyes and sees Jihoon next to him, sleeping soundly with head hidden in his hands on the hospital bed. The orange sky and setting sun shined throughout the entire room and highlighted Jihoon's figure.
Hanjin smiled softly as he touched Jihoon's hair, only for his hand to phase through Jihoon's body. He felt his heart drop and reached out to touch Jihoon again, only for his hand to disappear as he made contact.
“No no no, Jihoon…” he cried as he desperately tries to hold Jihoon's hand in vain.
“You know Hanjin, there's so many things I haven't said to you…” Jihoon slowly lifted his head. Only then did Hanjin realize Jihoon had been crying the entire time.
His eyes are red and puffy, tears still streaming down as his cheeks glistened from dried tears.
“I know I told you that you won't die… I didn't believe them when they said you didn't make it,” Jihoon spoke softly as he stared at the empty bed. The room was still full of flowers in various stages of decay and some decorations leftover from weeks ago. All of them from Hanjin's friends and family wishing him luck on the surgery. “The doctors didn't even know how your condition immediately got worst.”
“I'm still here, waiting for you, Hanjin-ah…”
Hanjin immediately got off the bed and tried to hug Jihoon, but not a single touch could land directly on Jihoon. Tears started blurring his vision.
“Jihoon…”
Every single memory from his past life came back to him. All the moments he died next to Jihoon, all the moments Jihoon grieved for him. The feeling of the dagger on his neck from his first life felt real. All the deaths he experienced over and over and the love he had for Jihoon all crashed into him.
The tears wouldn't stop, and he felt the lump in his throat starting to grow heavier. He couldn't help but call out to Jihoon, begging Jihoon to just look at him as his touch faded through Jihoon's body.
Then a sudden dark figure came closer to him.
“You…” Hanjin stood up, all his sadness burned into anger. “HOW LONG ARE YOU GOING TO CONTINUE TO TORMENT ME!?”
The figure gave no response. He stood there, unmoving.
Hanjin pressed his back onto the wall as he slid down. His hands covered his face, laughing from the absurdity of it all. He loved Jihoon so much that he caused pain in every life they lived in.
He hated that Jihoon still chased him regardless.
“No matter how hard I try, I guess my dumb decision from thousands of years ago still stand, huh?” he spoke, voice trembling. “Is loving someone really such a crime…”
“Jihoon, why… Every life. Every single time. Why would you do this to yourself,” he cried out.
“You know, Hanjin,” Jihoon suddenly spoke. Hanjin looks up to see Jihoon taking a rose from the vase next to his bed. “I'll always be here for you. Even in our next lives.”
Jihoon carefully places the flower right on the bed. He wipes his tears and smiled bitterly.
“I hope even if you die and we have to go back to being strangers once again, I hope we'll still be together until the end.”