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Chariclo Arganthone Cupid has created the group chat ‘cupid needs help’!
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid has added Darling Charming, Faybelle Thorn, and five other users!
Faybelle Thorn
oh my hexes
i’m SO sorry
i swear ill have the money by friday
Kitty Cheshire
you are forgiven 😊
Faybelle Thorn
NOT YOU PUSSYCAT
wait you made a deal with the fairy mafia too?
Kitty Cheshire
🤷♀️🤷♀️
not that i remember, no
Faybelle Thorn
so whos the italian that added us
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
what did you just call me
MY NAME IS GREEK YOU IDIOT
Faybelle Thorn
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW
I JUST SEE SOME RANDOM ASS NAME
wait
CUPID?
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
WE WERE LITERALLY PARTNERS IN CLASS ONCE ASSHOLE
Faybelle Thorn
🤔
looking for where i cared
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
girl FUCK YOU
Faybelle Thorn
FUCK YOU TOO CHARIZARD
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
WHAT??
Cerise Hood
i cant tell if im more baffled at chariclo or arganthone
Farrah Goodfairy
The fact that Fay immediately thinks it’s the fairy mafia doesn’t baffle you? 😓
Faybelle Thorn
farrah drop the grammar or i’m making you a base next cheerhexing practice
Farrah Goodfairy
omd fine
Darling Charming
faybelle how many times have you contacted the fairy mafia…
Faybelle Thorn
idk we’re highkey friends now
they know me by name 😝
Ramona Badwolf
not a good thing
Faybelle Thorn
oh stfu you probably lead a gay biker gang cult or something
Ramona Badwolf
sometimes
wanna join?
Poppy O’Hair
this is
the weirdest group of people ever
Darling Charming
no yeah
cupid why are we here
i think this is a horrible combination of horrible people
Farrah Goodfairy
:((
Darling Charming
farrah you know you dont count
Farrah Goodfairy
:))
Darling Charming
unlike your sold to one reflection mafia obsessed cousin
Faybelle Thorn
HEY
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
great question, darling!
i have gathered you all here today
because true heart’s day is upon us!
and i need help to ask blondie out ☺️
Ramona Badwolf
?
bitch u are the literal love god
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
bitch i hope justine finds flea in your fur and breaks up with you
Ramona Badwolf
WTF
Cerise Hood
how can she break up with her when they’re not even together 😭😭
Ramona Badwolf
IM WORKING ON IT.
Cerise Hood
bitch how is staring at her working on it
Ramona Badwolf
IM WORKING ON IT…
AND YOU CANT TALK
SHES LITERALLY YOUR ROOMMATE AND STILL NOTHING
oh wait
Cerise Hood
YEAH YOU CANT USE THAT AGAINST ME BITCH
Kitty Cheshire
lol the dogs are barking at each other 😹
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
so ramona and cerise are also hopeless…
kitty! you can help since you’re with lizzie right?
Kitty Cheshire
oh
haha
um
gotta bounce!
*disappears*
Faybelle Thorn
you did not just write disappears in chat like a fucking roleplayer
Kitty Cheshire
WHATEVER mafia ceo x reader
Faybelle Thorn
STOPP
I DONT LIKE CEOS GUYS
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
what if the ceo was briar beauty?
Faybelle Thorn
HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT
Farrah Goodfairy
does everyone in this chat love yelling
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
um
because you guys are dating?
Faybelle Thorn
WHAT
WHY WOULD I EVER DATE THAT ANNOYING PRINCESS
HAHAHAH WHAT
SHES KINDA CUTE
BUT I WOULD NEVER
Poppy O’Hair
not only is she y/n shes also a tsundere
Cerise Hood
shes kinda cute but i would never uwu
Kitty Cheshire
im not a dere
tsun tsundere
briar i have a jello heart im not that mean ><
Faybelle Thorn
STOP WRITING ME INTO WATTPAD
IM CURSING ALL OF YOU
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
well okay
anyways
poppy, farrah you guys are taken right?
Poppy O’Hair
no…?
Farrah Goodfairy
nope! 😊
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
oh my zeus
BY DUCHESS AND CRYSTAL? NO?
Poppy O’Hair
duchess is wayy out of my league are you serious
Cerise Hood
are YOU serious
DUCHESS?
Poppy O’Hair
hey dont hate on my beautiful princess with a disorder
❤️ react by Kitty Cheshire
Ramona Badwolf
garfield you cant react shes not yours
🖕react by Kitty Cheshire
Kitty Cheshire
what did you just call me
Faybelle Thorn changed Kitty Cheshire’s nickname to garfield!
garfield
🙂
Farrah Goodfairy
well as for me
im too shy to make a move 😞
crystal is so 🥰
wow!
and im so 😞
Faybelle Thorn
crystal’s a bitch
Farrah Goodfairy
fay :((
Faybelle Thorn
what im trying to make you feel better
Ramona Badwolf
faybitch you CANNOT be saying that
garfield changed Faybelle Thorn’s nickname to faybitch!
faybitch
yeah im a bitch and im proud 😘
Darling Charming
im sure briar is proud too
faybitch
STOP BRINGING HER UP I DONT LIKE HER
Cerise Hood
stop bringing her up i dont like her uwu
Poppy O’Hair
yeah and ramona’s finally gonna make a move
Ramona Badwolf
ARE WE NOT GONNA SLANDER CERISE?
Poppy O’Hair
i like cerise
Cerise Hood
👩❤️💋👩
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
….
well at least i still have darling
Darling Charming
for what
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
you know
since you’re dating apple?
Darling Charming
huh
i wasnt aware of that
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
are you serious
Ramona Badwolf
arent you like her true love or something
Darling Charming
yeah?
Poppy O’Hair
and…nothing’s happened?
Darling Charming
no?
i actually dont know if she knows
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
im going to kill myself
Farrah Goodfairy
and you’re just
okay with that?
Darling Charming
as long as shes happy im happy
and i would hate for her to choose me just because of her destiny
she can figure it out at her own pace ☺️
garfield
aww how sweet
good for you!
if lizzie calls me her friend one more time im pulling an evil apple white, blocking the well of wonder, and killing everyone
Farrah Goodfairy
wouldnt you still have to be friendzoned by lizzie though since wonderlandians arent affected?
Poppy O’Hair
farrah i love you
Farrah Goodfairy
aww i love you too ^_^
garfield
oh
well shit
Ramona Badwolf
fucking dumbass
garfield
kys
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
so
i contacted all the taken girls
to give me help
and it turns out not only are all of you single
BUT ALL OF YOU SUCK?
faybitch
i prefer to swallow
Ramona Badwolf
what, briar’s glittery pink strap?
faybitch
STOPP BRINGING HER UP 🖕🖕
Cerise Hood
stop bringing her up uwu 👉👈
Farrah Goodfairy
wouldnt you need to suck first to swallow
Darling Charming
cupid let me out
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
no!
you know, i originally made this chat to get me some help
but now i find it in my ‘love goddess’ interest to help you with all your problems now!
garfield
i know a problem lizzie could help me with 🤤
Poppy O’Hair
what? the friendzoning problem?
garfield
i cant even say anything against you because you might make me bald my next haircut
Poppy O’Hair
i know
Farrah Goodfairy
does a bald kitty look like a sphinx cat
Poppy O’Hair
we can try it
@garfield
im here unlock your door
garfield
STAY AWAY FROM ME SCISSOR SISTER
faybitch changed Poppy O’Hair’s name to scissor sister!
garfield
OH MY HEXES MADDIE LET HER IN
scissor sister
maddie specifically said
oh i was wondering what kitty would look like bald too!
garfield
HELP MEE
SHES COMING TO SCISSOR ME
Farrah Goodfairy
i dont think thats how you say it
Cerise Hood
the way nobody gaf
garfield
FUCK YOU CANT MAKE A MOVE
Cerise Hood
FUCK YOU FRIENDZONED
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
ive made the most auraless groupchat ever oh my zeus
the only person saving it is darling
Darling Charming
😎
cupid needs help!
Faybelle Thorn
god chariclo’s such an unmoanable name
Chariclo Arganthone Cupid
kill yourself
