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The smell came up to Shen Qingqiu’s nose, the most awful of stenches that he has smelled in ages.
He wrinkles his nose, the disgusting scent of earth and blood and of wet mud tickling him. It is an awful stench. Shen Qingqiu has no words to describe it other than if he smells it for more than a few heartbeats, he feels as though he’d vomit out all the substances in his stomach. He glances over at Luo Binghe, wondering if he had caught onto the smell.
His husband’s face is perfectly still, relaxed brows and lips pressed together, although not in a smile or frown. His expression is one worthy of a statue, expected of the protagonist. If anybody else had been looking at him, they wouldn’t have noticed anything amiss, except Shen Qingqiu did. He’d taken years of practice to notice when his husband felt certain emotions though they weren’t open on his face like a book.
Luo Binghe’s eyebrows were pushed in just slightly at the feeling of irritation and one of his eyes was twitching so subtly that Shen Qingqiu himself isn’t sure if he’s imagining it.
The scent is biting and it seems to only grow stronger until Shen Qingqiu can’t take it anymore.
“Binghe, are you smelling that?” He asks, flicking the fan around in his hand.
At the sound of his voice, Luo Binghe’s expression shifts, “Yes, do you want me to check it out? It smells awful.”
Shen Qingqiu nods his head, he agrees on that point. There’s just no way to describe the awful scent other than someone clearly needed to bathe or it had to be some monster but considering the lack of screaming in the peak, Shen Qingqiu guesses that it must be the former.
Luo Binghe heaves himself up from his spot, walking over to the entrance of the Bamboo House and when he opens the doors to check it out, he takes one step then two and stops. From his spot, Shen Qingqiu is left mystified when Luo Binghe has a confused expression on his face. The other turns around to look at him, mildly concerned.
“Liu-shishu.”
Shen Qingqiu is left lost.
“Are you saying the smell is your Shishu?” That couldn’t be right.
Luo Binghe nods. Shen Qingqiu sighs, if Luo Binghe said it smelled like him then it is him. The most he can do is hope that Liu Qingge is already planning on bathing himself but why the hell was the smell reaching his peak?
After a moment’s hesitation he gives Luo Binghe a command, “Get your Shishu, we’re giving him a bath.”
Such things were how they ended up in this situation. Shen Qingqiu sitting by the wooden tub, passing Luo Binghe anything he needed. Liu Qingge is sitting in the tub on Luo Binghe’s lap, his hair soaking wet and clinging to his face. The expression on his face is mystified as though he still hadn’t processed the fact that he is currently being washed and dried.
The entire plot of getting him actually in the tub was a whole other story. The stench had been so awful, that the second Shen Qingqiu spoke, Luo Binghe had run off to obey him despite Shen Qingqiu having not finished his sentence. He stood there stunned, wondering if Luo Binghe had processed anything he had said. A moment later, he had come back, carrying Liu Qingge as though he were Simba from The Lion King. The other had been struggling way too much so the scene only made him laugh.
He genuinely tried not to, but he just couldn’t.
Unfortunately, at that moment the stench had become far stronger once Liu Qingge was inside the Bamboo House and Shen Qingqiu’s laughter had turned into a coughing fit. He told Luo Binghe to get a tub and fill it with water and when he had said so, Luo Binghe dropped Liu Qingge on the ground and once again slipped away.
Shen Qingqiu was sure that Liu Qingge hadn’t processed any of it, which was how they were able to grab him, take off his robes and chuck him in the tub.
“What’s the point of this?” Liu Qingge asks, dragging Shen Qingqiu out of his thoughts.
Shen Qingqiu looks up, “Well, it’s beca—”
“You smell.” Luo Binghe cuts in. Shen Qingqiu frowns, he nearly scolds Luo Binghe but he really doesn’t want to bother him when he’s being so compliant for once.
“I don’t.” Liu Qingge retorts.
Luo Binghe scoffs, running soapy hands through the other’s hair, “You smell so bad I could sense it from here.”
“That’s because you’re a demon, your senses are probably way stronger.” Hearing this, Shen Qingqiu almost feels bad for him because how could he not smell himself? Even Shen Qingqiu could smell him and he was sure his senses were on average—for a cultivator that is.
“Shidi, I could smell you too.” Shen Qingqiu cuts in.
Liu Qingge looks at him, “Are you sure you’re not making that up?”
With that, Luo Binghe frowns and a second later, Liu Qingge’s head is dunked into the water.
“BINGHE.” Shen Qingqiu yelps, he immediately yanks his disciple’s hands off of Liu Qingge, glaring at him, “Don’t do that!”
Liu Qingge pulls his head out of the water, coughing out what had entered his mouth at that moment. He shoots a glare at Luo Binghe and pulls himself up out of the water.
“I’m leaving.” He declares.
Shen Qingqiu shoots a stare at Luo Binghe. Seeing the annoyance in his expression, Luo Binghe immediately wraps his arms around Liu Qingge and pulls him back down into the water. Liu Qingge tries to struggle free, but he only fails miserably in Luo Binghe’s iron grip.
“Shishu, this disciple apologizes for being mean.” He says slowly, his voice sounding overly dramatic and pitiful.
“You’re not even my disciple!” Liu Qingge exclaims, irritated.
Luo Binghe blinks innocently as though he hadn’t heard that at all. Instead, he holds out a hand for Shen Qingqiu to hand him some more soap. Shen Qingqiu passes it over and Luo Binghe uses it as he begins scrubbing at Liu QIngge’s back.
One thing that Shen Qingqiu realized he missed from the real world was the tools for hygiene. He could only watch listlessly as he remembers that he doesn’t have any access to shampoo or conditioner. Liu Qingge finally gives in and lets Luo Binghe clean him without having to have one arm wrapped around him to stop him from spilling water around. Already, Liu Qingge smelled a thousand times better than he had before.
“What’d you even do to get so–?” Shen Qingqiu asks, the last part implied.
“Stumbled into a muddy ditch and fell into a swamp.” He explains.
“Right. That explains the earthy smell but you also smelled like blood, why’s that?” For a moment, Liu Qingge looks confused. He tucks his knees in closer, leaning forward so Luo Binghe can get a better angle when wiping him clean.
“I think that was the pack of beasts—but it could’ve also been the plant monster. It had this giant mouth, well it looked like one and I think it had a reddish-pink inside and there were also these green spikes poking out of its ends so it looked like a cage when closed.” Liu Qingge explains, “I also fought this giant butterfly-like creature but it escaped so that might’ve been it or it could be the dog creature. It had these stripes and this weird shaped tail that ended in a point.”
Hearing Liu Qingge explain the different beasts he fought in just that period of time, it makes sense he would have the scent of blood on him. Somehow, Shen Qingqiu gets the sinking sensation that the plant monster was just Airplane rewriting the Venus Flytrap and the other, he had a suspicion that it was the Tasmanian Wolf.
How lazy.
“Was it basically any of the creatures you fought then?” Shen Qingqiu asks although he knows what Liu Qingge’s answer would be.
“Could be.” Liu Qingge responds, “It’d be their blood on me if anything.”
“You didn’t have any blood on you or on your robes.” Shen Qingqiu retorts.
“I don’t know then.” Liu Qingge answers.
“Shizun, can you pass me the bucket?” Luo Binghe asks. Stopping in his conversation, Shen Qingqiu grabs the bucket—when it got there, he didn’t know—and passes it over to Luo Binghe. He takes it and dips the bucket in the tub until it fills up with water.
“Close your eyes Shishu.” Luo Binghe warns.
“Huh?” Liu Qingge tries to turn and look at him but the bucket of water spills on top of him, flooding his soapy—when did Luo Binghe apply soap?—hair with dripping water. Liu Qingge blinks away the water, rubbing his eyes clean.
“What the hell?!” He hisses, shaking the water out of his hair. Shen Qingqiu quickly ducks to avoid getting splashed by the flying droplets, “What the hell did you do that for?”
Luo Binghe frowns, “I gave you a warning to close your eyes.”
“You didn’t tell me what for!” He protests. Shen Qingqiu exchanges a glance with Luo Binghe. He’s beginning to grow increasingly worried because logically, if someone is washing your hair and has a bucket of water and tells you to close your eyes, what do you do? Close your eyes. Although, it seems as though that logic has defied Liu Qingge and he had not thought to do that.
Shen Qingqiu sighs.
He glances at the tub. It isn’t the largest thing he’s seen but he’s pretty sure that he’d be able to fit into it if he wanted to even with the other two in it.
“Binghe, should I help?” He says, making a motion at the tub.
Luo Binghe’s eyes light up, “Go ahead.” Shen Qingqiu nods, unraveling his robes. They slide off him, falling to the ground and leaving him bare. Liu Qingge glances at him, clearly lost.
“What are you doing?” He asks.
“Helping.” Shen Qingqiu answers, stepping into the tub, “You don’t seem to understand how taking a bath works.”
“Who takes baths? You just brush yourself with water and that’s that.” Shen Qingqiu now standing in the tub nearly slips when he hears this. He drops to the bottom of the tub laughing, Liu Qingge looks even more confused and Luo Binghe just looks disgusted at hearing what Liu Qingge said.
“You brush yourself with water?!” Shen Qingqiu questions while laughing.
“Who doesn’t?” Liu Qingge counters.
“Shishu, people actually take baths.” Luo Binghe explains.
“Why? That’s so time consuming.” Liu Qingge retorts.
“That’s why I’m helping,” Shen Qingqiu adds, “If we let you continue walking around smelling like that, then nobody will want to be around you.”
Liu Qingge scowls but he doesn’t say anything more. Being satisfied with this, Shen Qingqiu crawls over till he’s almost touching Liu Qingge’s face with his own. He reaches over to pull the man’s hair to one side, brushing gently till the hair was wet and dripping altogether. Capturing the hand between his hands, he scrunches the water out of it, letting it drip back into the tub.
“Will you let us teach you then?” Shen Qingqiu asks, his voice teasing.
“Fine.”
That’s good enough for him.