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Writing something I'll never read again is something I never do—I never saw the point in writing anything if it wasn't important information that could be reused. But here I am, with a belief that's the exact opposite of my initial thinking.
And I doubt you'll find this piece of paper, Parrot. If you do, I'll honestly be surprised, though I'm sure—I can't even muster the expression.
Honestly.
There are so many things I could regret about what I've done in the past. So, I want to make sure my future self doesn't feel disappointed at least.
It's just that every disappointment I have will always be related to you, Parrot. Kind of stupid, right? I know.
I can't think of anything I've done in the past that disappointed me without it being related to you.
You're special to me, Parrot.
And I'm just a parasite to you.
I feel like I'm nothing but a burden and completely useless by your side—I can only hang on to the rope you hold for those around you. I don't know what would happen if you let go of that rope; I might even fall.
Beyond all the failures you've committed. I know you feel disappointed and sad for failing to save the people you care about, but you have to understand, Parrot.
You've tried so hard to save those people, even sacrificing yourself in return.
I can't lie, but I'm actually angry when I try to do the same to save you, and you try so hard to stop me.
And I know that, over time, if you continue doing this, you'll only destroy yourself and those around you. I also know that I'm not the right person to help you with this—maybe in the future you'll find someone who can still be by your side no matter what.
Someone who will continue to step forward to protect you, because of how special you are to them.
At first, I thought that person was me. That I was someone who could keep you safe, but in the end, I just locked you in a cage, preventing you from doing what you wanted and stripping you of your freedom.
I wasn't protecting you from the start.
When I imprisoned you, I was initially amused by how hard you tried to break free from Paragon.
I thought you were a lost cause.
Because no matter how hard you tried to use various tricks to deceive me, you would ultimately fail. It was impossible for you to surrender and change into what I wanted under my control; you were stubborn.
Because I thought I knew you, Parrot.
But I was wrong.
The reality that, I really didn't know you that well.
You made me realize that you were unpredictable from the start. In truth, there's nothing I can truly predict, because living beings have always lived in a world full of contradictions.
You are not a lost cause. It's just that I was wrong to put you in that category from the start, because if I put you in every phrase I thought of—it would never end.
From the start, you were you.
Someone I've known all my life at unstable smp. Someone I consider my best friend, someone who walks by my side through every problem and who we can be sure will be resolved.
Parrot, you are a great person—and will be a hero to some. And I hope you realize that—not everyone wants to be saved, but thank you for everything you've done for me. It's made me understand the meaning of friendship itself from you.
Believe in yourself, Parrot. No matter what the future holds, stay strong and keep moving forward. Because I know you will, that's one thing I've never been wrong about you.
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