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When their Master forces them to part once again, Hailou says goodbye to Haixia.
"She won't let anything happen to you, so just... just be careful and wait for me. I'll come back for you the moment she looks away, I promise. I love you."
Hailou's voice is heavy with sorrow, but his lips still curve into a gentle smile as he leans toward Haixia. The older man catches him by the nape of his neck and pulls their lips together.
"Behave yourself. Don't give Master a hard time," Haixia scolds softly.
Never, in all his life, had he been able to stay angry with Hailou. No matter how foolish the things his beloved did, all Haixia ever felt was worry and fear for his safety.
And now...
Now that they had to part, even if it would only be for a few days, he worried. He worried so very much.
But Hailou would be with Master. She would not allow him to die a meaningless death, would she?
"It's only a few days. You won't die from missing me. I'll be safe. You don't need to worry..." he promised, tightening his fingers at the back of Hailou's neck.
He feared the day their farewell would have to be final.
He didn't want to say goodbye to Hailou.
A slight frown appeared on Hailou's face as he sank to his knees before Haixia's wheelchair. His arms slipped gently around the other man's waist, and he pressed his cheek sweetly against his stomach.
Hailou inhaled deeply, filling his lungs with Haixia's scent—the only scent that had ever meant safety to him.
The warm sweetness of medicinal herbs and a faint trace of hawthorn immediately filled his senses.
But beneath it...
Beneath that familiar scent, he detected something else.
Medicine.
Blood.
Hailou gave no sign that he had noticed anything wrong. He merely let out a low, quiet whine, like an unhappy puppy.
Haixia sighed softly, one hand immediately finding its way into Hailou's hair, stroking through the dark strands with soothing motions.
There were so many things he wished he could do for Hailou.
But with his broken body, all of them remained forever beyond his reach.
He wanted to be able to carry him to bed.
He wanted to take care of him.
He wanted to stand at his side and protect him no matter what.
But until he could manage even three steps without support...
He would never be able to do any of those things.
Hailou ran too fast and flew too high for Haixia to ever catch up.
Moments like this—when Hailou slowed down and stayed beside him—filled Haixia's heart with longing and grief.
Because Hailou had never forgotten him.
Never abandoned him.
Never continued forward with his natural lightness, leaving behind all the sorrows and burdens of the world.
Hailou always came back.
Always.
He remembered Haixia's limitations. He adjusted himself to them without complaint.
And that hurt.
The fact that his beloved boy had been forced to become a man because of him.
Haixia hated his shattered, ruined body.
But he loved Hailou too much to leave him behind.
Wasn't this their own personal hell?
Haixia had loved Hailou with his whole heart from the very first day.
From the moment he saw him as a skinny child in torn, filthy clothes, when Master brought him home.
Even then, before he had words for the feeling, he had known he wanted to stay close to Hailou.
He wanted to care for him.
And that was exactly what he had done.
For years.
For decades.
But now Haixia knew.
His time was running out.
And when his life finally came to an end...
What would happen to Hailou then?
Who would take care of him?
Haixia couldn't tell him the truth.
He couldn't bring himself to confess that his life was nearing its end.
He couldn't say a final goodbye.
So instead, he wrapped his arms around him and repeated the same words he had whispered hundreds of times within the small world they shared.
"I love you."
And without hesitation, Hailou answered with those same words.
Was there any crueler feeling than knowing you were going to break his heart?
Haixia could not imagine one.