Archive of Our Own

Cassie would be getting off the school bus right around now.

It was an absurd thought to have while meteors rained down on her, but even on a different planet with a different solar day, Janet’s body knew how much time had passed at home. Even as she ushered more Edorans forward, promising safety and shelter, she pictured Cassie’s disappointed face when she wasn’t there for dinner again. The days Cassie would want to spend time with her were rapidly drawing to a close, and here was where Janet was spending another one.

She wasn’t even supposed to be here, not really. If all had gone according to plan she would be on the other side of the Stargate, waiting to receive and triage the refugees as SG1 sent them through. But shortly before beginning the evacuation, SG1 had reported a preterm baby too sick to move, and Janet had volunteered to bring her through without hesitation. The baby and her parents were safely on the other side and by all rights, Janet should have been with them. But not far behind had been a frail, elderly couple who needed considerable encouragement to pick up the pace, and behind them a young man who had suffered a broken leg with the first meteorite strikes. Jack had ordered her through the gate several times, but there always seemed to be one more patient.

Jack himself had been forced to go through when a pair of sisters in their eighties had latched onto his arms and refused to go through without him. Their fear was reasonable enough, but Jack’s consternation had been clear, as had the firm command in his voice as he had ordered them all to follow as soon as possible. Teal’c had gone shortly after, arms loaded with as many children as could cling to him, and Sam had followed to help maintain gate stability after a few meteorites clipped the edges. Janet had been steps behind when Laira, the colonel’s friend, had run up screaming for help finding her son. After a quick glance at Janet, Daniel had sprinted after Laira through the trees, leaving Janet the only SGC personnel left to supervise the evacuation.

Even as the meteors tumbled closer, shaking the ground with each strike, Janet forced herself to wait for one more Edoran, one more shaking hand grasping towards her. She could no more leave any of these people here to die than she could leave her own daughter. Though, she thought as the last meteorite struck clean through the gate and hurled her through the air, the reality of it was, she had left her daughter.

For a split-second she was weightless, then with a horrific crunch, everything went black.

By the time she heard Daniel’s voice, she couldn’t tell what time it was on Earth anymore. Her watch still worked, date and time down to the second, but when the moon rose in the Edoran sky, that was what triggered her circadian rhythm. 

It was early afternoon on Earth, Cassie would be finishing lunch, but Janet blinked with the grogginess of the early morning when Daniel burst into the little house. “Janet!”

“Daniel?” she blinked at him through a haze of pain and sleepless nights. By the time she had regained consciousness, some good citizen had dragged her out of the pile of rubble and set her on one of the few remaining beds in the village, but no one left had known how to set her bones. Janet had bitten down on a thick leather belt as a timid young woman had pulled on her ankle with as much force as her body could apply, and when her helper promptly fainted at the crunch of bone on bone, Janet had splinted it herself.

“Janet, are you okay? What happened?” Janet almost laughed at the ridiculousness of the question- she was wearing a makeshift brace for fun and the sling on her arm was for fashion. But he laid concerned, gentle hands on her face, tracing the greenish-purplish bruises, and Janet deflated. She shrugged, and winced at the jolt to her arm.

“I didn’t make it through,” she said simply.

“The Stargate?” he asked immediately, and Janet shook her head.

“Gone. Or buried, I haven’t been able to look.” She gestured to her bandages, and Daniel blanched as though he had just noticed.

“Are you all right? Do you have any other injuries?” If she did, and they were significant enough, she wouldn’t have lasted this long. Janet shook her head.

“Just a few broken bones. Where were you this whole time?” For the first time she examined his companions: Laira, who had dragged him away in the first place, her son Garen, and a young, tearful girl. They all looked stricken by the state of their village, but otherwise none the worse for wear.

“Some caves outside the village. They bore up pretty well, we’re mostly just shaken up. Janet-” He gave her a proper lookover, frowning at the state of the clothes she had been in for the last three days, the blood crusted in her hair, and her dusty bandages. “Have you been here the last three days? Has anyone helped you?”

“They’re busy.” Janet waved off his concern, absurdly self-conscious when her appearance should have been the least of her worries. It was easier than worrying over whether she would ever see Cassie again.

Daniel’s face hardened. “I’m going to get you out of here. Will you be all right for a little while if I go to check out the Stargate?”

“Please, Dr. Fraiser?” Janet blinked, then nodded. Laira gave her a tentative smile. “I think you would be more comfortable in my home. We passed it on the way, it fared far better than this one.” Janet opened her mouth to object, but Laira cut her off. “You have done so much for us, please. Let me do you this one small favor.”

“Do you think you could move?” Daniel asked, evidently having made up Janet’s mind for her. She gritted her teeth, but admitted to herself that it might be nice to sleep in a room without a hole in the ceiling.

“Not quickly,” she said, and Daniel cast a thoughtful look up and down her body. Janet flexed her foot, still in her boot that she had used to anchor her splint. She was not looking forward to removing that for the first time- as far as she was concerned, they could burn her socks.

“Garen,” Daniel said after a moment. “Give me a hand and try to keep her leg supported.” Without another word, Daniel wrapped Janet’s uninjured arm over his shoulder and hefted her into his arms. Garen was a step behind, and her leg dropped like deadweight before he caught on and grabbed it. Janet hissed and Daniel’s arms tightened around her. 

“I’m sorry!” Garen said, white-faced and terrified, and Janet couldn’t summon the energy to give either of them a glare. She laid her head on Daniel’s shoulder and let him carry her away, not caring where she ended up.

Cassie would be done with lunch by now.

The Stargate was nowhere to be found, but Daniel insisted on optimism. He wouldn’t be deterred, every morning for weeks he rose with the sun and didn’t return until well after dark, dragging Laira’s shovel behind. The resolve in his eyes didn’t fade, but tension coiled more in his shoulders every day he returned with no good news.

In the meantime, Janet relearned how to walk. She had never had a head for PT- much easier to refer to the professionals- but she dragged exercises out of years of memory and diligently worked on building back muscle and tone as her bones knit themselves back together. Laira kept her fed, and once she was strong enough, kept her occupied teaching her to feed herself. The most experienced village healers had made it to Earth, but Laira was well versed in household remedies and Janet soaked up all the knowledge she could. Anything to keep her mind busy and far away from home.

Once Laira got her strong enough to take care of herself, Janet threw all her renewed energy at taking care of Daniel. While she had recovered he had grown more haggard, dark circles growing under his eyes every day. He hadn’t agreed to take Edoran clothes for several weeks, insisting that they keep all their resources for themselves. While Janet grew accustomed to the long dresses and shawls Laira hemmed up for her, Daniel’s jacket seemed to grow three sizes as he wasted away underneath it.

By the end of the first month, when Janet could walk around for a few hours a day and make herself useful around the house, she had had enough of his moping. Laira had plied him with food for weeks, but one evening Janet slammed a plate in front of his long face and ordered him to eat up. Daniel jumped and looked up at her with wide, startled eyes, and Janet realized it was the first time in a while she had acted like his doctor.

That tone would have inspired greater stubbornness in Jack, but Daniel picked up his fork and took a few contrite bites, and Janet let out a long slow breath into a warm smile that felt stiff on her face. Daniel looked up at her and slowed mid-chew.

“What? Is it too hot?” Janet asked, poised to get him some more water, but he shook his head.

“No, it’s just-” He gestured vaguely in her direction with an unidentifiable look on his face, something between pleased and surprised and reminiscent. Janet looked down at her dress, then back up at him, confused. Daniel just smiled. “Thank you.”

Janet sat up, almost preening. “You’re welcome.” Her eyes went steely. “I expect you to finish all of that,” she said firmly. “Doctor’s orders.”

Daniel tucked back into his food with an amused gleam in his eye. “Yes, ma’am.”

They made it almost two months before their first major cultural misunderstanding, which had to be some kind of record. SG1 usually managed it within the first ten minutes.

Ignoring Laira’s insistence that they were both welcome at her home indefinitely, Daniel started to build a house for the two of them. The rest of the village was mostly rebuilt to the point everyone had roofs over their heads, and they were getting through the barns and sheds and shops as a community. 

He had discussed it with Janet first, of course, and they had agreed that they couldn’t live as visitors forever. Daniel had had no success with finding even a scrap of the gate, and much as they both wanted to believe that they would get home someday, the possibility was only growing more remote. So, Daniel drew up plans, cut lumber, made nails, and bartered for tools.

Janet wanted to help, but at Laira’s cajoling and Daniel’s flat refusal she had to admit she was nowhere near strong enough for anything on that scale. She settled for staying in Daniel’s orbit, making sure he ate and drank and rested, and occasionally collected his glasses when he dropped them off the newly-assembled roof.

Most of the work was not conducive to conversation, since hammers and saws tended to require the majority of concentration. But in the moments when Daniel was measuring, or sanding, or taking a break at Janet’s insistence, they found they had enough in common to carry a decent conversation. Janet wasn’t exactly surprised- she had known him for years as his doctor, it wasn’t as though they were strangers. But something about being the only Tau’ri in a village full of Edorans made talking to each other easier than talking to anyone else. 

Janet spent most of her time helping Laira around the house, or splinting and bandaging a growing pool of patients as the rebuilding continued. But what free time she had, she spent with Daniel. On days she couldn’t help him with the house, she found herself jittery and restless by nightfall, soothed only by the sound of his footsteps at the door. If his wide smiles and engulfing hugs were anything to go by, he felt the same. Much as she tried to ignore it, when Laira gave her sidelong glances, all Janet could do was blush.

In retrospect, they probably should have seen it coming. The Edorans were a hearty people, and they stayed that way through commitment to each other and their way of life. Naturally, they assumed that their planet of origin would have customs similar to theirs. And when one of Janet’s patients asked her casually one day how long she and Daniel had been married, his shocked expression when Janet reported that they were not even together was almost comical.

They had been welcomed, but they were still foreigners. It spread through the village like wildfire, igniting whispers and looks ranging from confused to downright judgmental. Laira apologized for her people, but agreed that they would be making life much harder for themselves if they lived alone in the house Daniel had built, just the two of them.

“Why not just get married?” Laira asked, and Janet snorted before she could stop herself. When she turned to Daniel she expected a similar reaction, but instead he looked contemplative. Janet raised her eyebrows at him, and he tilted his head with a shrug.

“Why not?”

Janet’s jaw dropped and a hundred reasons why not raced through her mind in seconds, but she just swallowed and said, “Okay.” After all, if she had to have a roommate, she would rather have Daniel than anyone else on the planet, and that had to count for something.

Edoran weddings were just different enough that Janet didn’t feel guilty about the fact that Sam and Cassie weren’t next to her, that her parents weren’t sitting in front of her. She had spent the entire day up to the ceremony helping Daniel prepare the house, but it didn’t feel like bad luck. When she washed her face, changed into a finer, delicately embroidered dress Laira had helped her make, and sat still for Naytha to weave flowers into her hair, it all felt like just another errand to run. Like they had to measure and saw and hammer to put the house together, they had to get married to live in it.

For just a moment, when Naytha pressed a handful of wildflowers into her hands with a small smile, all Janet could see was Cassie and the bottom dropped out of her stomach. She had never pictured herself getting married again, but in any other world Cassie would have been there, hopefully beaming. She couldn’t imagine marrying anyone Cassie didn’t like, but she could definitely picture the scowl if she did.

Janet consoled herself with the fact that it was a marriage of convenience more than anything else and that Cassie probably would have railed against the whole thing. What Cassie didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her, Janet thought, and forced a wide smile at Laira to hold back a hot surge of tears.

One of the few remaining village elders read from an ancient book that made Daniel’s hands twitch, and tied their hands together with a green ribbon while they vowed to cherish and protect each other for the rest of their lives. Easy enough, Janet thought, when she cherished and protected Daniel as a natural state of being. He had lit up at the sight of her, and looking up into his face as he made his vows, Janet could almost believe him. It made her heart squirm uncomfortably in her chest, and she shoved the feeling aside for later.

Later wouldn’t come until after the celebratory feast, which could have lasted a year for all that Janet remembered. The last she could recall, Payann handed her and Daniel small glasses of a substance that smelled like jet fuel and burned just as much on the way down. After that were some blurred memories of music, and people whirling around them, and Daniel’s calloused hands in hers as he fumbled along to the dance.

Golden light glowed behind her eyelids and Janet screwed up her face before she cracked her eyes open. A daisy-like flower flopped in her face, still lightly tangled in her hair. She blinked slowly, trying to remember where she was, how she got there, and what the little snuffling noises were. A pillow came into view, then a tangled bedspread, then-

“Daniel!” With a deep snort, Daniel shot up in bed, eyes flying open. He looked around blearily before he remembered to grab his glasses. Janet gaped at him, momentarily distracted by his bare chest. Not that she hadn’t seen it- she’d done chest compressions on it, for heaven’s sake- but the last few months of hard labor had toned muscles she wasn’t used to seeing.

“Good morning,” Daniel screwed up his face and rubbed his eyes, shoving his glasses up to his forehead in a move that should not have been as ridiculously attractive as it was. “What’s wrong?”

Janet sat up slightly and shivered in the unexpected chill before she looked down and snatched the blanket to her chest. “What did we do?” Daniel gave her a sidelong, sheepish glance.

“I’ll be honest, I don’t exactly remember,” he said, with far more regret than the situation warranted. He sounded as though he wanted to remember. He pulled one elbow across his chest and stretched his shoulder, then did the same on the other side and rolled his neck in a wide, slow circle. Janet suddenly was incredibly parched. “But, well-” He didn’t seem to know where to point and made an awkward swirling motion to indicate their state of undress. “I think I can guess.”

“How can you be so calm?” Janet hissed. She had a strong urge to jump out of bed and start pacing, but couldn’t see any clothes to put on, and if she took the blanket she’d be exposing Daniel.

“I mean, I hoped it would be more intentional and romantic- and that I’d remember it- but-” Janet gaped at him, and he trailed off with a frown.

“We- do you realize what we’ve done? We said this was just to be able to live together!”

“I didn’t say that.” Janet’s brain, for lack of a better term, short-circuited. She cast back through her memory and realized that no, he hadn’t, but that had been her assumption from the beginning. Daniel sat up ramrod straight and gave her an alarmed look. “Was that what you thought?”

“Yes, Daniel, that is what I thought!” She didn’t need to yell, she knew absently, but didn’t bother lowering her voice. “When Laira said we should get married and you said, and I quote, ‘Why not?’, that is what I thought!”

Daniel tried to hide it, but for a split-second his shoulders dropped and his eyebrows gathered together and he looked absolutely crestfallen. Janet refused to examine why he would look like that when he had never so much as kissed her until the village elder told him to.

“Oh.” Caught between the urges to strangle him and kiss his frown away, Janet stayed still and silent. “I see.” He shuffled to the side and plucked his pants from the day before up off the ground on his side of the bed. Janet stared as he maneuvered them on without shifting the blanket too much until he was covered up. 

“Your clothes are folded in the dresser,” he reminded her, like she hadn’t organized them herself the day before. He pushed the blanket towards her and she wrapped it as tightly around her body as she could manage. “Do you want me to, um-?” With a sigh of defeat, he covered his eyes. Janet slid off the bed and scampered to the back room without looking back.

The house had two rooms: a large front room that consisted of the kitchen, a table, and a bed, and a smaller room that shared a wall with the stove and had a sturdy little window for natural light. It was meant to be Janet’s, safer and more private, and she had assumed that a bed would shortly join the desk and dresser Daniel had set in there. Within two days he procured one from heaven knows where, and arranged it to her specifications without a word.

It was miserably awkward, nothing like she had imagined cohabitation with him would look like. Daniel was as kind and civil as she had ever seen him, bordering on bland. Every morning he thanked her for breakfast and scrubbed his dish, and left without a word or a glance in her direction. He returned in the evening, dusty and sweaty, and asked a few quiet questions about her day before heading to the pump in the back they shared with the neighbors to wash up. More than once Janet caught herself watching surreptitiously as he scrubbed his face and arms, dabbing his face with the hem of his shirt. She always shook herself with a stern reminder that he was literally the only Earth-man around, of course she was drawn to him. It didn’t mean she liked him because he was Daniel, just because he was there. That was the only reason, besides the whole living together part, that she could conceive of why he would want to marry her. She was familiar, she knew what he had lost, and he would never have to explain indoor plumbing before bemoaning the loss of it.

Sometimes, she caught him staring at her over dinner, and her mind whispered other reasons he could have had for binding himself to her before she told herself firmly to shut up. 

With just the two of them, and Daniel barely in the house as it was, it required very little upkeep. Janet still found herself at Laira’s most days for a few hours at least, despite the fact that Daniel had built a whole house so they wouldn’t impose on Laira anymore. But Laira never made her feel like a bother, on the contrary, she beamed whenever Janet made her way up the path. “You are always welcome here,” she assured her, and Janet took solace in the fact that at least someone on this planet was being completely honest with her.

Rebuilding efforts started to slow as they managed what crops they had salvaged through the growing season, but patients still made their way to Janet’s door. Some were just curious to see the newcomers’ home, and looked around like they expected flying saucers to swoop through the window. Others, like her, were among those slow to recover and were just looking for something to do. With Laira’s guidance, and Garen and Naytha’s conscripted help, Janet built up a considerable store of home remedies and plain teas, something for the most basic maladies. She studied the effects of a poultice that kept a deep, nasty wound clean and dry until it healed on its own, and mixed and matched herbs until she found a combination that soothed an anxious old woman to sleep.

As the weeks went by, twinges of pain and aching soreness in her arm and leg came less frequently, and Janet spent more and more time on her feet. There was too much to do and not enough- she filled her days but not her thoughts. Daniel noticed her increasing frenzy as the days lengthened in the heat of summer, and she often caught him frowning at her as she fluttered around the kitchen, but he didn’t say anything. 

Eventually, not even her expanding collection of herbs could keep her occupied, and she asked to tag along to the Stargate site in the evenings. Normally she wouldn’t even have bothered asking, but there was a non-zero chance he would end up having to carry her back at some point, so she courteously allowed him some input. Daniel slowly chewed and swallowed his dinner- a recipe she’d been practicing, made with fish Garen had presented to her with great pride- and didn’t answer for a long time.

“You shouldn’t wear yourself out,” was his eventual, deliberate answer. “You’re still healing.” Janet rolled her eyes, falling easily into their old banter even with far less warmth behind it.

“I need exercise,” she said with an air of finality. “And a shovel.”

“Janet-”

“Daniel.” She turned a hard look on him, mortified at a burning in her eyes she couldn’t explain. “Please.” He examined her closely, and took so long to answer her hand clenched around her fork.

“All right,” he said. “But we’ll start slow.”

Janet rolled her eyes. “Fine.”

She didn’t really let him set a time limit; whenever they worked on the Stargate site, she simply pretended not to hear him until she felt she would collapse if she shoveled one more scoop of gravel. Then she would shovel a few more, just to stick it to him, and only then allowed herself to be escorted home.

She didn’t know when she started thinking of it as home, but the first time she caught herself a pang of despair hit her squarely in the chest. Daniel had taken one look at her and bundled her away, snatching the shovel from her hand to quell her protests. She didn’t show it so plainly after that, the absolute misery that descended on her whenever she stood over the decimated Stargate site. Some part of her still had hope that drove her to push her body past its breaking point trying to get home, but a more predominant part, the part that gave her nightmares of Cassie screaming for her and nearly pressed her into the ground with the weight of her depression, chipped away at that hope. Soon all that would be left was obsession, but Janet couldn’t bring herself to care.

All Daniel had had of his wife for three years was obsession with revenge, and she didn’t see him coming apart at the seams.

She should have known it wouldn’t last, it was too good to be true. There was no version of Daniel Jackson that would allow her to run herself ragged for longer than it took him to realize she wasn’t going to stop herself. On a rare, rainy day, Daniel physically barred the door to keep her from venturing out to the site.

“You’re being absurd,” he said evenly, arms crossed and stance wide to keep her from darting around him. “You’re not going out there.”

“It’ll be fine, the rain will loosen the mud,” Janet argued, and tried to slip past only to have him grab her arm. She gave a token struggle, but found she couldn’t muster the energy for much more than that.

“Yes, and make it slippery. How about we don’t break your other leg?” Janet rolled her eyes. Her healing progress had hit a wall and he knew it, but she refused to acknowledge the truth of it. On Earth she probably would have gotten surgery, but all she could do on Edora was try to scrounge up the right vitamins and minerals for her bones to heal themselves, and walk the fine line of building strength without tearing the healing tissues apart again. “Janet.” She reluctantly met his eyes, and for the first time in a while he cautiously reached out to brush his fingers over her face.

Janet sucked in a breath and despite herself, the muscles in her back unwound. Daniel continued rubbing his thumb over her cheekbone, seemingly just to enjoy the feel of it.

“You’re working too hard,” Daniel said quietly. “I know you like to keep busy, but this can’t be healthy.”

“I need to work.” It ground its way out against her will, without her even realizing the truth of it until she said it out loud. “I have to.”

“And you do. You contribute a great deal to the community. I’m just concerned you’re overdoing it.”

“I can’t slow down, Daniel.” She jerked away from his hand, but she didn’t bolt for the door again. She stalked back into the house, arms crossed tightly over her chest. “I need- I need to move.”

“Why?” It was such a simple, complicated question, and the answer broke out of her without her permission.

“I can’t think about her.”

“About-?” Daniel cut himself off. “Cassie.” Hot tears sprang to her eyes and she ducked her head. Her watch still ticked away on Colorado time, dutifully counting off every second she had missed.

“I-” Her voice cracked. “She’s already lost- so much-” Strong arms wrapped around her from behind, and Janet turned to collapse into his chest. “I promised- I promised-”

Daniel didn’t say anything, just held her as she sobbed. When she felt like she could string two words together again, she held up her watch. “We were supposed to celebrate her birthday today. I got coverage months in advance so I- so I could have the day off.” She sniffed, and laughed once without an ounce of humor. “I guess I should have had a contingency for getting marooned on an alien planet.” 

Daniel rubbed her back until she could take a deep breath without choking on it. “What do you think she’s doing right now?”

Janet furrowed her brow in confusion, but saw no reason not to answer. It was vivid in her imagination, right down to the sun glinting off the highlights Cassie had spent a summer begging for. She wondered if she had grown them out, or if she had sweet-talked Sam into taking her back to the salon. 

“She wanted to go roller skating, so Sam probably took her. And if Colonel O’Neill was involved he took her for ice cream and probably got her way too much.” Daniel chuckled and it shook through his chest, and Janet resisted the urge to tuck closer. “And then she wanted some friends over, for pizza and a movie.” She glanced at her watch. “Probably finishing up the movie now.”

Daniel stroked her hair, and the barbed-wire coil of agony in her stomach didn’t seem quite so sharp. She let out a long breath, picturing Cassie’s happy face, surrounded by her friends.

“She’s not alone.” Daniel pulled back to look her in the face. “You didn’t leave her alone. She still has a family.” He nudged Janet’s chin and gave her a little smile. “You still have a family, too.” For the first time, when she met Daniel’s eyes, she let him see the exhaustion there, and his eyes went impossibly soft.

She felt on the verge of doing something stupid, like opening her mouth to say she loved him or to ask him to kiss her. He didn’t let the moment stretch, instead giving her shoulder a squeeze. “Listen, Payann invited us to evening supper. I think we should go.”

Janet cocked an eyebrow. “He never struck me as our biggest fan.”

Daniel shrugged. “I knew you’d break him down eventually.”

“He’s never been here, he refuses to come see me.”

“You respected his boundaries,” Daniel said, and Janet grinned. “Please?” Janet looked up at him for a long moment, and on a whim reached up and ran a finger over his eyebrow. He blinked at the contact and his fingers tightened infinitesimally around her waist.

“All right.”

Daniel grinned and, seemingly unwilling to give her the chance to change her mind, dragged her out the door as soon as possible.

‘Evening supper’ turned out to be a village-wide party, something Laira explained they liked to do at least once a season. It brought them together and strengthened their bonds through the ups and downs of planting and harvest and all the potential disasters in between. Evidently she had been begging Daniel to get Janet to come, having sensed that no one else could have shepherded Janet away from the gate site.

Following Daniel’s lead, Janet sampled every dish offered and declined only Payann’s liquor with the same vehemence and at the same moment Daniel did. Janet saw half-memories spinning behind his eyes and heat buzzed up her cheeks.

Ever the cultural enthusiast, Daniel got himself roped into almost every single dance and party game. Janet stayed to the outskirts, consenting to one dance with Laira but otherwise keeping out of the action. She laughed with everyone else when Garen stumbled blindly to Naytha, and clapped when she took off the blindfold, though she wasn’t sure what for. “What’s that game?” she half-yelled over the din, and Laira shot her a knowing grin.

“The gods led him to his true love,” she responded, and watched fondly as Naytha grabbed Garen’s hands and pulled him into a dance. Janet watched them for a moment, hoping that wherever she was, Cassie was just as happy. Then someone slipped the blindfold over Daniel’s eyes, and something went still in Janet’s chest.

It was just a silly game, she thought as Daniel groped blindly through the crowd. Girls tittered and shoved each other in and out of his path, but one of the men Daniel worked with shoved him practically into Janet’s lap. Laira snatched her drink from her hand at the last second, and Daniel and Janet grabbed each other for balance in the jostling bodies. A cheer went up in the crowd as Daniel shoved the blindfold up off his eyes. He smiled down at her, slightly confused.

“I’ll be honest, I didn’t really get the gist of this one, they just sort of threw me into it,” he said, leaning down to speak directly into her ear. “Did I win?” Janet shook her head and plucked the headband off his forehead to toss at one of the smirking workers.

“Nope. I did.”

Three months, Janet knew, could be a very long or very short time. For her fourteen year old daughter it was an eternity, the distance between summer and Christmas break, the time it took her hair to grow out of a style she didn’t like.

Looking back to their arrival, three months felt like forever ago, but other moments felt like yesterday- when she first heard his voice after three days of pain and loneliness, looking into his eyes as he promised to love her forever, their first kiss at evening supper- the first one they both remembered, anyway- and how she had whispered for him to take her home.

There was no panic when she woke up beside him now, only a glance out the window to see if they had to get up or if she could burrow into his chest a while longer. They had the domestic parts mastered- even when they weren’t speaking, they had still been considerate roommates- but other things were bright and new discoveries. The four little kisses he liked to give her before he left in the morning- eyes, nose, mouth- the way he tangled their fingers together when they walked along the river, the nonsensical words he murmured in his sleep- Janet wished paper weren’t such a hot commodity, otherwise she would have written every single moment down.

Daniel rolled over in his sleep, lazily sweeping his arm over the mattress until he found her and drew her to his side. Janet laid half on his chest, tracing little circles on his skin as she counted his breaths. She had grown to recognize the slow uptick in respirations and single deep sigh before he woke up, and it gave her a little squirm of pleasure every time she was proven right.

“That tickles,” he muttered, and Janet smiled and laid her hand flat on his chest. 

“Sorry.”

“It’s all right,” He tilted his head down and smiled to find her wide awake and watching him. “Not a terrible way to wake up.”

“Mm. I’m glad.” Daniel cupped her chin and nudged her up to kiss him, and Janet melted. Daniel smiled and rubbed his nose against hers.

“Definitely in my top three ways to wake up.”

“You have a list?” Daniel nodded, tugging her fully onto his chest. Janet laid her chin on her hands and closed her eyes as he toyed with her hair.

“It’s a work in progress,” he said conversationally, and Janet smiled.

“Care to share your findings, Doctor?”

“Well, Doctor, if you insist. But it is a physical demonstration.” A thrill ran up her spine and she fought to suppress a giggle as he trailed a hand up her back.

“Well, for the integrity of the experiment.”

“Oh, I agree.”

When they were both thoroughly awake, Janet settled back onto his chest, one leg hooked possessively over his hips. She went back to tracing nonsense into his skin, half-thinking it was everything she didn’t know how to say to him. 

He grabbed her hand and kissed it. “Any particular reason you’re marking me up like a freshman’s paper?” he asked, and she snorted. 

“I’m just thinking.” Daniel waited, and when she was not forthcoming he nudged her. 

“About?”

Janet let out a slow breath. “Sha’re.” Daniel went still, and for a second Janet braved herself to be shoved away. She wouldn’t blame him, it was a touchy subject, but it had been weighing on her since she had finally given in to letting herself be happy here. 

After a few seconds, he spread her fingers apart between his, comparing the size difference and tracing up and down between her fingers. “Not a name I expected to hear.”

Janet wrapped herself a little tighter around him, not caring how desperate she seemed. Daniel spread the hand on her back as if to hold her more securely. “What would you do if she were to walk through the Stargate right now, completely herself again?” It was horrendously unfair, and she winced preemptively before he could even react. 

He was silent for long enough her heart rate started to tick up. “Daniel?”

“I’m thinking.” After another long moment, he let out a sigh. “She’s not coming back.”

“But if she-”

“If she were to walk through the Stargate, I suppose I’d take her home, to her father and her people. Then I’d come back here, and in this world where the Stargate works, I’d take you home to Cassie.”

Janet considered, and craned her neck to look up into his face. “You’d make a great politician.” Daniel smirked, and swept her hair off her face. He looked up at the ceiling and an almost-frown settled over his features. “She’s gone.”

Janet furrowed her brow. “That doesn’t sound like you.” Daniel cocked an eyebrow, and it was so reminiscent of Teal’c Janet almost laughed. 

“What do you mean?”

“I mean… you’ve been looking for her for three years. That’s the whole reason you joined the SGC.”

“Yeah, well, as long as I was moving I didn’t have time to stop and think.” Janet shifted a little to keep her legs from going numb, and Daniel tensed to hold her head over his heart. She relaxed slowly, settling into a determinedly languid puddle around him. 

“And now you do?” Daniel stroked her arm and nodded. 

“I’ve been chasing a dream. Well, it wasn’t even that, I was chasing revenge and pretending I was chasing a dream.” Even flat on his back he managed to slump a little. “I lost her as soon as Apophis marked her out. I was never gonna get her back.” Janet shifted so she was holding him rather than sprawling on him. “Besides, even if there were some magical cure, I’m not the same man I was.” The pain in his voice spoke of the rage he had discovered he was capable of, the ability to kill and destroy that had terrified him since the first pull of a trigger. 

“Oh, I don’t know.” She traced a finger over his eyebrow, down the bridge of his nose. “I think you’re still the same guy I met three years ago. Broody, sweet, devastatingly handsome…” Daniel’s mouth ticked up at the corner. 

“‘Devastatingly handsome’?” Janet shrugged. 

“Well, if you recall, the day we met everyone else turned into cavemen, so the competition was a little rigged.” Daniel’s eyebrows shot up. 

“That seems like so long ago. Was that your first day?”

“Mm-hm.”

“Wow. Welcome to the SGC.” Janet grinned and nuzzled into his chest. “Got any more deep questions for me while I’m deprived of coffee?” He hadn’t had a cup since their MREs ran out, and Janet almost would have called it withdrawal how visceral the shock had been to his system. 

“Just two.”

“Shoot.”

“If we do find the Stargate and go home, will you keep looking for her?”

He didn’t hesitate this time. “I promised I’d bring her home. No matter what that looks like. I owe her that.” Janet burrowed into him and he held her tight. “I’d take her home, and I’d say goodbye. And then I’d come home to you.” Janet stretched up to cup his jaw and kiss him. He drew it out, long and melting, then nuzzled his nose into her hair. 

“Last question?”

“Mm-hm.” Her cheeks heated up. “If it had been someone else- Sam, or one of my nurses- that got stranded here with you instead-” She didn’t get to finish the question before he screwed up his face in disgust. 

“Sam?” Janet looked up at him incredulously. 

“You’re going to tell me you don’t think she’s beautiful?”

“I mean sure, but not- I’ve never had a sister, but the general feeling is that I don’t want anyone to lay a hand on her, but I definitely don’t want to be the one laying a hand on her.”

Janet nodded. “That’s what it’s like.”

“There, you see?” He shuddered. “Oh, you owe me for that.”

“Owe you?” He wrapped his hands around her hips and rolled them over. He gave her a deep kiss that made her unspool into the mattress, tension leaving her body one muscle at a time. 

“Oh yeah. Big time.”

Later, once the sun was high enough in the sky they really should have been out of bed, Daniel let her catch her breath and curled himself around her, pressing her back against his chest. Janet closed her eyes, pleasantly sore and ready to go back to sleep until patients started physically banging down her door. 

Daniel kissed her shoulder. “I love you.”

Janet’s eyes snapped open, and she turned in his arms to look him in the face. He smiled, a little self-deprecating, as she gaped at him with open shock. 

“Really?” Three months ago she would have hated the waver in her voice, but she couldn’t bring herself to care as Daniel swept a strand of hair off her face. “Because I- I know you don’t have a lot of options, you don’t have to-” Daniel cut her off with a searing kiss, rolling on top of her but careful to keep most of his weight on his elbows. He was everywhere, all she could see and feel, and he hovered over her with a determined scowl on his face. 

“I love you,” he said slowly. “That is why I married you. That is why I wanted to live with you.” He kissed her again, and Janet clung to his shoulders. “You’re not convenient,” he whispered into her skin, and tears sprang to her eyes and she blinked rapidly to keep them back. “You’re not my only option, I’m not ‘making the best of this.’” Janet wound a hand into his hair, still cropped short for the warm months. Daniel pressed kisses to her neck and shoulder, slipping one hand under her waist to arch her into him. 

“I love you.” He drew back to look at her, something like frustration on his face at her overwhelmed state. He brushed the tears from her eyes. “Please believe me.”

Janet’s arms tightened around him, and she nodded. “I love you, too.” A bright grin spread across his face that made him look ten years younger and months of tension rolled off his shoulders. He kissed her senseless, whispering the words against her skin until the sun was far higher in the sky.

Month four came with nausea and aching and she really should have expected it, was honestly surprised both of them hadn’t gotten more sick already. Whatever little virus made its way around the village they both tended to catch with a vengeance, but they had tolerated the food, water, and environment far better than Janet would have predicted. Especially with their allergies, though Daniel always traveled with several months’ worth of antihistamines that would hopefully get them to winter, at least. 

Daniel didn’t give her a moment’s peace, constantly searching for ways to keep her as bedbound and still as possible. Attuned to her every grimace and shift, he hovered around the house and brought her tea, food, and cold cloths she very well could have gotten herself. After a few days of his loving, determined care, Janet could barely stand the sight of him. After much convincing she would be fine, and a promise to send for him if she got worse, Daniel finally consented to go to work. He kissed her first-eyes nose mouth- and Janet became a little contrite under his gentle hands. 

“I love you,” he said, with a bit more weight than most morning goodbyes, and Janet stretched up to kiss him again. 

“I love you, too.”

True as it was, she couldn’t help the small voice inside that wondered when, exactly, he would get to experience this bug for himself. 

The nausea waxed and waned as Janet tried to go about her business, and after a few more weeks she began to suspect it wasn’t a stomach bug to which she was uniquely susceptible.

Harvest season was upon them, and the air was thick with dust and dirt as almost everyone in the village made the trek to the fields and back every day. Janet took to barring the door until Daniel deposited most of his clothes in a wash bin in the back and scrubbed himself down as thoroughly as he could. It did make her feel a little better when he smelled relatively fresh, and every night he presented himself for inspection, stripped to his skivvies, and asked if he was presentable enough to enter his home. Janet rolled her eyes and stood aside to let him in, and when he grabbed her from behind and snatched her back against his bare chest her stomach barely gave more than a twinge. 

While Daniel worked in the fields or wherever he could make himself useful, Janet, who was strong enough for household activities but definitely not enough for hard labor in the sun all day, got their little house ready for winter. Laira had assured her they had months to go, but had given her detailed instructions for food and herb storage, and general battening down of the hatches. Janet spent her days drying herbs, and ruined a few batches of tomato-esque vegetables before she got the hang of canning. Though she was busy with her own preparations as the days shortened, Laira spent days with her walking her through every step, practiced hands guiding Janet’s unsure ones. 

Janet remembered sometimes, usually with a wry grin, that six months ago she had been cutting into human beings on the regular and stitching them back together with renowned precision. Preparing vegetables wasn’t quite as enthralling, and it made the house stuffy and her stomach roll, but there was a certain satisfaction to looking down at a day’s work and knowing she had kept them fed for another week. 

Laira usually didn’t stay late with Garen trudging home the same time Daniel did, but occasionally Janet could convince her to sit down long enough for a cup of tea. She was becoming famous for her brews, as much for taste as for medicinal qualities. It was not a talent she had ever seen herself developing, but it did make her happy to watch Laira take a deep inhale of steam and relax in her chair, smiling at the first sip. 

“This is excellent,” she said, and Janet smiled as she prepared her own cup. This blend wasn’t as aromatic as others, which she had found settled better in her stomach. Whatever seasonal plant had made its way into her diet she hoped made its way out soon, because she’d had no luck isolating it. She wasn’t looking forward to going through this every harvest. 

Janet sat down for the first time in hours and let out a deep sigh. She took a tentative sip of the tea and smiled in relief when her stomach didn’t lurch. 

Laira watched her contemplatively, warming her hands on her mug. “Are you still feeling unwell?” Janet rolled her eyes and nodded, firmly over whatever was wrong with her. She could barely remember what it was like not to feel unwell. 

“Yes, I still haven’t managed to isolate whatever’s causing it. Of course, if it’s something to do with the harvest I’ll just have to wait, or if something’s blooming in the meadow.” She suppressed a yawn. 

“You’re tired, I should let you rest.” Laira took a few more sips and stood to go, despite Janet’s protests. But before she walked out the door, she turned with a vaguely embarrassed look on her face. “I know you and Daniel weren’t really living as a married couple at first,” she started, and Janet blinked at the subject change, “but I’ve seen how you’ve both changed, and I assume it’s different now?” Janet’s mind took a moment to catch up, and she flushed. Laira gave her a small, apologetic smile. “For how long? More than a few weeks?”

Janet gaped, trying to do the math as she wondered why on earth Laira wanted to know. It had been four weeks since evening supper, but of course there had been that assumed first time after their wedding they had both decided didn’t count-

Janet’s thoughts slammed to a halt, and Laira’s eyes widened in alarm as her face drained of all color. “It’s just an idea,” Laira said in a rush. “Something to consider.” Janet nodded mutely, and Laira’s face softened. She crossed back into the room to wrap an arm around Janet’s shoulders. “You won’t be alone,” she promised. When Janet still didn’t answer Laira left her to her thoughts, promising to stop by the next day. 

She wanted to tell Daniel- wanted to cry and shake him a little bit, really- but she couldn’t decide if she believed it or not. After a nearly silent dinner, Daniel bundled her into bed, convinced she was feeling worse and trying to keep it from him. 

She didn’t feel worse, exactly. Just very different. But she didn’t argue as Daniel tucked in behind her and draped an arm over her stomach. 

In the morning, before he kissed her goodbye, Janet wrapped her hands in his shirt and looked up at him, unsure of what she was feeling. “We might be here a very long time,” she said, painfully aware that he had done this all before. But on Abydos, Sha’re had been a native welcoming him into a world she knew and could help him navigate. On Edora, Janet was stumbling along just as blindly as he was. 

Daniel frowned, and slowly nodded. “Yes, we might.”

“Forever, maybe.”

“Maybe.” He laid his hands on her shoulders, scrutinizing her face. Janet let out a deep breath, unsure of the point she was trying to make. 

“I’m okay with that, if it’s with you,” she said quietly, and his eyes softened. He pressed a kiss to her forehead and she closed her eyes, arms wrapped loosely around his waist. 

“Me, too.” He kissed her eyes, her nose, her lips. “Are you all right?” Yes and no, she felt like she was on the knife’s edge of a deep precipice. But Daniel was on the edge beside her. She nodded. “Okay. I’ll see you later.”

“I love you.” 

Daniel grinned, and Janet smiled back as some of her strange mood dissipated. “I love you, too,” he said, and with one more kiss he was gone. 

Janet stood in the doorway for a moment, then turned into her empty house. She rested a hand on her stomach, and for a moment she wanted to see Cassie’s face so badly it was physically painful. Then she took a deep breath and got to work. 

When Daniel returned, freshly scrubbed before he set a foot in the door, she was waiting for him at the table. He stopped in the doorway and tilted his head. Janet curled her hands together on the table, leg bouncing. 

With slow, cautious movements, Daniel took the seat across from her and looked down at the table. She had spread their old gear over it, fatigues and radios and sidearms. Daniel pressed a button on the radio and blinked when he found it responded. “Impressive battery life,” he said lightly, and Janet quirked a nervous smile. 

“I was looking through our clothes,” she started. “I wanted to make sure we have something thick enough for the winter.”

“Uh-huh.” Daniel just frowned at her, and she bit her lip. 

“I think- if we’re going to be here, we need to be here.” Not pretending to understand yet, Daniel laid a hand on the table, palm up, and Janet grasped it in both of hers. “I’m always going to hope they’ll show up for us- but I think we need to stop waiting.”

We was generous, Daniel had integrated into the community months ago to the point he could have been a native. Besides the whole shotgun wedding business, the people treated them as one of their own. If either of them had been holding on, forcing trips to the gate site that were as unfruitful as they had been four months ago, it was Janet. 

“Are you sure?” He ducked his head to look her in the face. “We can pack this away somewhere, we don’t have to let go just yet.” Janet shook her head. 

“I can’t-” She took a deep breath, squeezing his hand. Daniel leaned forward to brush his knuckles over her cheek and she leaned into his touch, squeezing her eyes shut. 

“How about I give it to Garen?” he asked softly. “I’m sure he’d be fascinated, at least with the radios. The guns I can bury in the woods.” Fighting to keep herself together, Janet nodded. Daniel stood and rounded the table to pull her up into his arms. “Do you want me to do it now?” Janet almost choked, Cassie’s face vivid in her mind, but she nodded again. Daniel kissed her forehead. “Okay.”

Without another word he gathered their things and left, leaving her alone in their completely Edoran home. Janet buried her face in her hands, but by the time he returned, her face was dry. He pulled her into an embrace, a little sweaty again from the work of burying the guns, and just held her in silence for several moments. When Janet couldn’t stand it anymore she wrapped her arms around his neck and stretched on her tiptoes to kiss him, and by the time he hitched her off the floor and carried her to their bed, neither of them were thinking about the radios anymore.

A few days later, Janet was hanging the washing when Daniel returned from the fields. There was a pleasant breeze in the air that promised cooler temperatures overnight, and Janet thought of the blanket folded neatly on the table. Laira had pressed it into her arms the day after her visit, smiling knowingly when Janet tried to protest. “If you don’t need it now, you will soon,” she’d said with a smirk. “It was Garen’s, it kept him safe and warm through his first winter. I want you to have it.” It was a thick, sturdy little thing, an undyed tan, more concerned with function than aesthetics. It was the size of one of Janet’s shawls, but softer, and Janet had teared up at the feel of it on her fingers. 

She was ready to believe it, or at least consider it. She could have kicked herself for not thinking of it sooner, if she were her own patient she would have suggested a pregnancy test weeks ago. There was nothing like that on Edora, only the physical signs and math that lined up. And the math did line up, especially with their blank wedding night. As Daniel returned from the pump, hair glistening and face fresh, Janet smirked as she realized they could now safely assume that something had happened that night. 

“What are you smiling at?” Daniel asked, and gave her a quick peck. Janet shook her head. 

“Just thinking.” About their wedding, about the blanket on the table, about Cassie. Janet thought she would have been happy to be a big sister, as long as she got to keep her room. 

“Oh really? Me too.” Daniel leered down at her and Janet rolled her eyes, grinning. “I’m thinking you look exhausted and should probably go straight inside and lie down.”

“Hm, I am feeling a little tired-” 

“Daniel!” Their heads snapped towards the voice, Daniel with one hand halfway to her face and Janet with a laundry basket on her hip. Garen skidded into view, waving one of the radios over his head. “Daniel! Janet!” He nearly fell over at their feet. “It made noise!”

“It- what?”

“A sound came through it! Someone said your names!” Daniel and Janet stared at each other, both their faces indecipherable. Then Daniel squeezed her hand, darted inside for the shovel, and in a flash had disappeared towards the gate site. 

Janet looked at the washing fluttering in the breeze, thought of the blanket on the table and dinner on the stove. “Are you coming?” Garen asked, bouncing with excitement. 

Janet turned off the stove, handed Garen the pickaxe, and followed him down the path towards the gate site. 

When they got there Daniel was shouting on the radio between hacking away at the earth. “Janet!” he called when he saw her, waving ecstatically. “It’s Teal’c! The gate was buried, but he made it through!”

“How is that possible?” Janet asked when she got close enough. Her stomach clenched and Garen joined Daniel’s frenzied digging. 

“I have no idea.”

It had Sam written all over it, and Janet’s heart ached for just one more look at her friend. 

“Teal’c! Can you hear us? Are we in the right place?” With one more swing of the pickaxe, a gopher-sized hole opened up in the earth. Daniel cast the shovel aside and dropped to his knees. “Teal’c?”

“I am pleased to see your face, DanielJackson.” At the sound of his voice, Janet’s knees gave out. She barely felt the jolt on the rocks and dirt, she was too busy retching. 

“Janet? Oh my- you really were tired, I’m so sorry-” Daniel swept her hair off her face and when she was finished, pulled her into his arms and stroked her back. 

“Is DoctorFraiser well?” Teal’c called, and as she burst into tears Janet realized it was the first time she had heard her last name in months. She was just Janet here, no need for any further qualifiers. 

“She’s actually not feeling good, Teal’c, we should really get her home.” He meant the SGC, and she couldn’t blame him- it was the first place that came to mind for her, too. 

“Then I shall redouble my efforts.”

“Garen, run back and get help, all the help you can find- actually-” Daniel looked down at Janet, and the care in his eyes was the only part of her life that hadn’t changed in the last ten minutes. “Do you want to go home and lie down? Garen, take Janet-”

“No.” With a deep breath, Janet pushed herself out of his arms and onto her wobbly legs. “I’ll stay. At least to examine Teal’c.” A wild, overjoyed grin split Daniel’s face, and he nodded at Garen. Garen took off running, shouting the news long before anyone else could hear him. 

After settling Janet on a large, relatively flat rock, Daniel got to work picking away at the hole. They had to be careful not to dislodge the part Teal’c was anchored to, but with Daniel on one side and Teal’c on the other, they made short work of it. Teal’c handed his gear up first, then reached out a hand for Daniel to haul him up. 

The sight of him, tall and imposing and covered in dust, nearly undid Janet all over again. She made her way over to him and didn’t bother to pretend to examine him, instead just flinging herself into a hug. “I am pleased to see you as well, DoctorFraiser,” Teal’c said in his deep voice. 

“Cassie?” Janet asked, almost too quietly for him to hear. 

“CassandraFraiser misses you greatly, but she is in good health. ColonelO’Neill has looked after her.”

“Jack?” Daniel and Janet exchanged an incredulous look, and Janet stepped back. “I would have thought Sam would have-”

“SamanthaCarter has been working tirelessly to return you home,” Teal’c said, and Janet took a hitching breath. 

“Of course she has.” Daniel wrapped an arm around Janet’s shoulders and Teal’c cocked an eyebrow, but before he could say anything Garen returned with a mob of villagers. 

“We need to find the DHD,” Daniel called. “And uncover the Stargate.” He split the Edorans into groups and they set to work with gusto, cheering when Teal’c announced their friends and families were safe and well on the other side of the gate. They brought food and drink and it became a party that lasted the night. Janet did what she could, plying everyone with water and telling them to rest, until she was swaying on her feet. Daniel insisted she go home and get some sleep, and without letting her argue Laira slipped her arm through Janet’s and offered to take her. “I don’t need to be escorted,” Janet argued, but Laira just applied gentle pressure until Janet’s feet started moving. 

“I’ll see you in the morning,” Daniel promised, and kissed her once before returning to work. 

As Janet was steered away she heard Teal’c say, “I see the nature of your relationship with DoctorFraiser has changed, DanielJackson.” Daniel laughed nervously, but Janet didn’t hear his reply. 

Like she had dozens of times before, Laira started a pot of tea and fished Janet’s favorite blend out of the cupboard. Janet collapsed at the table, staring blankly at the blanket, still folded up nice and neat. The house was disturbingly unchanged- Janet felt there should be some sign of its impending emptiness. 

“You can have the herbs,” Janet said quietly as Laira set a steaming mug in front of her. “And the food, whoever needs it most. The house-” Laira covered her hand with her own. 

“All will be taken care of,” she promised, and nudged Janet’s mug closer. Janet didn’t touch it, instead rubbing a corner of the blanket between her fingers, feeling the softness of it. 

“Obviously I won’t take this,” Janet said, without letting go. “It’s Garen’s, he should have it for his own children.”

Laira shook her head. “It’s a gift. I won’t take it back.”

“Laira-”

“Janet.” Laira reached across the table and took her hand. “Take it. Please.”

“We can’t even be sure right now,” Janet said in a rush. “On Earth we can run tests, and-”

“As I have said,” Laira said with a teasing smile, “if you don’t need it now, you will soon.” Janet flushed, glaring down at her mug. 

“Everything is different on Earth,” she said, and Laira tilted her head. 

“I’ve seen how he looks at you,” she said simply. “Not everything will be different.”

By the time the villagers uncovered and erected the gate, there was no reason for Daniel and Janet not to go back right away. Their sparse belongings had been dispersed, the house and food entrusted to Laira for distribution. All they chose to take along was a bag of Janet’s favorite tea, and the green ribbon tied around Daniel’s wrist. As Teal’c dialed Earth, Laira pressed a bag into Janet’s arms, soft enough that she knew what was inside. Janet pursed her lips, but slung the bag over her shoulder. 

“Thank you for everything,” Daniel said as Laira pulled Janet into a hug. 

“There will always be a place for you here.” Laira rubbed Janet’s arms and gave her a significant look before turning to embrace Daniel.

With a familiar clanging and scraping of metal, a wormhole whooshed into existence. Teal’c pointed his GDO at the opening before he nodded at them, and Daniel and Janet stepped up to the gate together. Janet hesitated at the threshold.

“Daniel-” Before she could say another word, he cupped her cheeks and kissed her. She knew the callouses on his hands and the stubble on his jaw, and wondered if they would stay that way or if he would reintegrate so thoroughly she wouldn’t recognize him.

“I love you,” Daniel murmured, and that was familiar, too. Janet’s heart flipped. “Ready?” Mutely, Janet nodded.

Together, they stepped through the gate.

Her first impression once the wormhole fizzled out behind them- Teal’c would remain until the displaced Edorans returned, to supervise the gate- was that the embarkation room seemed much darker than she remembered. She didn’t have time to notice anything else before she was almost knocked clean off her feet.

“Janet!” Sam clung to her, and at the sound of her voice something cracked in Janet’s chest she’d been keeping under tight wraps. She hugged Sam back just as fiercely, already baffled that she could have been so content a galaxy away from her best friend.

Sam tackled Daniel next as General Hammond approached the ramp, beaming. Jack had been on Sam’s heels, but he stayed farther back looking vaguely amused as Sam started to babble.

“I’m so sorry, I could have gotten you back sooner-”

“If only someone hadn’t forced you to sleep,” Jack said with a tut. “Time-sucker, that.” Sam flicked him a heatless glare.

“Dr. Jackson, Dr. Fraiser, I’m very pleased to have you back.” Janet gave General Hammond a small smile, and glanced around at all the ecstatic faces pouring into the embarkation room. Janet’s staff bundled her and Daniel away before Hammond could open his mouth to order them to the infirmary for an exam.

“Sam,” Janet managed to say before being swept away, “could you put this in my office?” She held out the bag, expecting immediate questions, but Sam only took the bag and all but ran out the door.

“If you had any big favors to ask her, now is probably the time,” Jack said casually, ambling along beside as Daniel and Janet were shepherded down the hall. “I think she’d figure out a way to give you the moon, if you asked.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Daniel asked with a frown, and Jack raised his eyebrows.

“Only that she’s pulled more twenty-hour shifts in the last four months than I have in twenty years of service,” he said, tone deliberately light. “Hasn’t seen the sun more than twice. Broke the laws of physics. All that stuff.”

“Sounds like she should be asking us for favors,” Janet said, and her heart tugged at the mental image of Sam, hunched over and working tirelessly in the darkness of her lab while Janet had been living it up with Daniel light-years away.

Jack shrugged. “She should. But it’s Carter.”

They had reached the infirmary, where the nurses were waiting to take samples of every bodily fluid imaginable, but Janet halted and turned to Jack before she went in. “I heard you’ve been looking after Cassie.” Jack shrugged, suddenly bashful. “How is she?”

“She’s a tough kid, doc. She missed you like hell, but she always told me you’d be coming back.” He cocked a smile. “With Carter on one end and you on the other, she seemed to think you had the issue handled.”

Cassie was so close, closer than she had been in four months. The last thing Janet wanted to do was sit in decon when her daughter was on this planet, a short drive away, and for a split second she almost considered elbowing past Jack and booking it for the elevator. But Daniel called her into the infirmary, and she went without hesitation.

Once they’d given their samples and been thoroughly scrubbed down, Janet flagged down Dr. Warner. He was looking more haggard than before, and Janet grimaced at the thought that he’d probably been covering at least some of her shifts for four months straight. She and Daniel had left empty spaces behind, waiting to be filled. Janet wondered briefly if she would still fit before she shook herself and spoke under her breath. “William, I need you to add another test to my bloodwork.” Warner tilted his head in professional concern. Janet glanced back at Daniel, sprawled on one of the minimalist benches that made up the decor in the decon room. Already, his legs were bouncing and he drummed his fingers on the bench, looking around aimlessly. Janet didn’t want the fondness that squeezed at her heart. 

“All right.” Warner raised his pen to his clipboard. 

Janet lowered her voice further. “hCG.” Warner stilled, ballpoint tip to the paper, but his face betrayed nothing. 

“STD panel?” he asked, as though they were discussing some other patient or what to buy for lunch. “And I’ll arrange for a private room.”

Janet shook her head. “That won’t be necessary.” Warner scrutinized her for a long moment before he made a few marks on his clipboard and nodded. 

“I’ll let you know as soon as possible.”

“Thank you.” Janet shut the door to decon herself, and the click of the doorknob had a certain finality to it. 

“What was all that about?” Daniel asked, and Janet smoothed over her expression before she turned to face him. 

“I have a theory about why I’ve been feeling sick. I just asked them to add an extra test to verify.” It was entirely the truth, but Janet’s stomach still flopped over like a guilty fish. 

Daniel scooted over to make room, but Janet took a seat on the bench opposite from him. He blinked at her and she shrugged. “It’s hot in here.” Daniel frowned and looked down at the goosebumps on his arms. 

“I suppose.”

Janet leaned her head back and closed her eyes, but even though she could feel Daniel staring at her, he didn’t say anything. 

When Warner returned and declared them free of any pathogens, Janet’s watch told her someone must have expedited the tests. But she had felt every second crawling over her skin, and Daniel’s eyes bore a hole in her. Whenever she had opened her eyes to check her watch she had found him watching her, frown deepening with every minute. 

Warner slipped her a piece of paper as they left decon and Janet kept it clenched in her fist until she had some privacy to change into the fatigues Sam had brought her. Part of her knew what it was going to say, but her hands trembled as she unfolded it. 

hCG- positive. 

It hit her square in the chest, sucked all the air out of her. Her heart pounded as though all it had needed was those two words on a paper to unleash all the stress of the last four months combined. Sweat beaded on her upper lip and she flushed, and she shakily lowered herself to a squat, head between her knees. 

“Janet?” Sam was hovering outside the curtain and sounded concerned at the lack of movement. “Are you all right?”

“Mm-hm,” Janet answered, voice thin and completely unconvincing. Sam darted around the curtain. 

“Janet! What’s-?”

“Sh!” Janet shot to her feet and her head spun, and Sam grabbed her arms with a look of absolute terror. 

“What’s wrong?” So much was wrong and it was her own fault- she had known Daniel was married, had known her birth control would wear off, had witnessed first hand the miracles Sam could pull off with enough desperation. She had put herself in this situation and much as she wanted to blame Daniel, she could hardly be upset at him for loving his wife. 

“I need you to do me a favor,” Janet said as the blackness faded from her vision. Sam’s face came clearly into view, pale and panicked. 

“Okay, yeah, anything.” Janet steadied herself on Sam’s arms and took a deep breath. 

“I need you to stall him.” Sam frowned, eyes still wide and alarmed. 

“What?”

“Daniel. I need you to keep him on base for a few hours.”

“Why?” Sam’s expression shifted slightly and her hands tightened. “Did something happen?”

“No,” Janet said immediately. “Nothing bad. I’m just going to pick up Cassie and take her to my parents’. Hammond gave us two weeks.”

“But why do you want me to keep Daniel here?”

“Please?” The words were on the tip of her tongue- the house, the shotgun wedding, the slip of paper stuffed in her pocket- but she bit her tongue. “Please, Sam.” Evidently she still looked unwell enough that Sam just nodded. “Thank you.” Janet stretched up and wrapped her arms around Sam’s neck, and Sam returned the embrace with so much force Janet’s toes left the ground. 

Sam gave a little hitching breath and a few tears fell on Janet’s shoulder, and Janet cupped the back of her head. “Thank you,” she said again, “for everything.”

“No problem.” Sam’s small voice cracked, and she squeezed Janet more tightly for just a second before she put her down. She wiped her eyes and gave Janet a watery smile. “Let’s get you out of here.”

Extending her guardianship privileges, Sam called ahead to Cassie’s school. Janet almost ran her car into the curb at the sight of Cassie waiting at the door, hands clenched tight around her backpack straps. Thankful that the parking lot was otherwise empty, Janet skidded to a halt and bolted from the car. 

“Mom!” It was nearly her undoing, all that kept her standing was the fact that Cassie needed her to. Cassie bounded into her arms, tears streaming down her face, and Janet finally felt like she was home. “I knew you’d come back, I knew you’d come back-”

“I missed you so much- honey I’m so sorry-”

“You’re back.” Cassie wrapped her arms more tightly around Janet’s middle- any closer and she would have slipped under Janet’s skin. “You’re here.” Janet nodded, and Cassie tucked her head into her shoulder and sobbed. 

After several minutes of hugs and kisses and “I love yous” Janet bundled Cassie into the car and took her home, explaining her impromptu vacation plan on the way. Cassie threw a bag together in the few minutes it took Janet to check the fridge and the mail- Sam had said Jack had cleared both out periodically, and Janet reminded herself to thank him when they got back. Jack Jr. warily sniffed her ankles and Janet crouched to scratch his ears.

“Mom?”

“In here!” Janet called from the kitchen, and Cassie skidded to halt in the doorway, panting. She tackled Janet with another hug and Jack Jr. skittered out of the way before Janet could knock him over. 

“Just checking,” she said in a tiny voice that broke Janet’s heart. 

“I’m right here sweetie.” She wrapped her arms around Cassie’s shoulders. “Right here.”

Sam did her duty with a vengeance- they were several hours down the road before Janet’s phone rang. Cassie snatched it up before Janet could tell her not to. 

“It’s Daniel,” she said, and went to answer when Janet shook her head. 

“It’s just mission briefing stuff,” she said, keeping her eye on a tractor trailer that was trying to merge. “I’ll call him later.”

“Hi, Daniel!” Janet sighed and gave Cassie a sidelong glance. Cassie beamed at Daniel’s voice, unrepentant. “I’m okay. I missed you.” Torn between urges to tune him out and hone in on his voice, Janet caught Daniel telling Cassie he had missed her, too, before his voice turned questioning. “Yeah, Mom’s here.”

“Not now, I’m driving.” A sedan with a death wish flew by on her left and Janet flexed her hands on the steering wheel, grumbling. This was one aspect of modern life she hadn’t missed. “I’ll talk to him later.”

“She says she can talk to you later.” Cassie paused to listen. “We’re going to visit Grandma and Grandpa, Mom pulled me out of school and everything.” She shimmied down into her seat, phone tucked tightly to her ear. “Two weeks.” There was a long pause, and Cassie tilted her head. “Daniel?” She blinked when he started to speak and gave Janet a puzzled look. “Are you okay?” His “yes” came loud and clear and completely unconvincing, and Janet ground her teeth together even as guilt gnawed in her stomach. “You sound weird.”

Firmly telling herself to get a grip, Janet forced herself to stop straining to hear him. She guessed that he asked what Cassie had been up to when she launched into a description of her latest friend group drama, and Janet smirked at the mental image of Daniel’s face as he tried unsuccessfully to follow along. Cassie fell silent enough times he must have been telling her about Edora, and there was no screaming, so he left out the developments in their relationship. Janet’s heart squeezed.

Twenty minutes later Cassie said her goodbyes, and Janet could finally exhale. Cassie narrowed her eyes and opened her mouth to start an interrogation, but Janet cut her off. “Help me look for a hotel, we’re calling it for tonight.”

Two weeks flew by, mostly because Janet tried to squeeze in all four months she had missed. For once, Cassie was up for it, seemingly as unwilling to be apart from Janet as Janet was to be away from her. It was bound to be temporary, so Janet took every second Cassie was willing to give her.

Time away from work, with her parents in the house where she’d grown up, also served to ground Janet back to reality. This was her world, her life- Edora seemed more and more like a dream with every day that passed. Only the persistent nausea and a new zest for taking vitamins drilled in the painful truth that she hadn’t left everything behind there.

At first, Cassie bought her re-assimilating excuse, having had an extensive period of learning which Earth foods were best to avoid. But there was the fatigue, and frequent trips to the bathroom, and on the fifth day that Janet declined one of Daniel’s calls Cassie finally confronted her.

“Are you dying?” she demanded, arms crossed as she glared in her pajamas. It was the second time she had caught Janet on her knees in the bathroom, and Janet froze as she reached for her toothbrush.

“What?”

“Did you get sick on Edora? Is that why we’re here? Because you’re dying?”

Janet stuck her toothbrush in her mouth. “I’m not dying.” She scrubbed her teeth so hard she probably scraped enamel, and Cassie was still frowning at her when she rinsed out her mouth.

“You’re lying to me.” Janet sighed.

“Honey-”

“If you’re going to die I want to know now.” Chin jutting out, Cassie fixed her with a hard look. But her lip wobbled and horrified realization stole the air from Janet’s lungs. Of course she would think that, of course she would be terrified-

Janet yanked Cassie into her arms. Cassie tried to play tough for a few seconds before she buried her face in Janet’s shoulder, clenching her hands in Janet’s t-shirt to the point it must have been close to tearing.

“I promise I’m okay. I’m not going anywhere.” Janet kissed her head. “I’m so sorry, sweetie, I didn’t think. I’m not dying. Everything is okay.” Everything Cassie needed to worry about, anyway.

“Then what’s wrong?” Janet sighed and stroked Cassie’s hair. Daniel had the right to hear it first, but Janet had managed to put over a thousand miles between them, and at this point she couldn’t ask Cassie to wait until they got back. Whatever her mind produced in the meantime would be far worse than the truth.

“Let’s go sit down.”

Cassie refused to let go, and the two of them ended up snuggled together in Janet’s bed before Janet took a deep breath. “I’m pregnant.”

She hadn’t actually said the words yet, and they hit her almost as hard as they hit Cassie. Cassie went perfectly still, head on Janet’s shoulder, arms around her middle. For several seconds she didn’t answer.

When Cassie finally spoke, her voice was small. “I get to stay, right?”

“What?”

“When Bethany’s mom had a baby she made Bethany go live with her dad because there wasn’t room,” Cassie said in a rush. “But we have room in our house and I promise I’ll help-”

“Cassandra.” Janet gave her a nudge, and when Cassie reluctantly sat up Janet took her face in her hands. “You are my child. As much as this baby, in all the ways that matter. I will never send you away, I promise.” Cassie burrowed back into her arms and Janet hugged her fiercely. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Cassie said quietly, and for a moment they just held each other. But Cassie could never stay silent for long. “Who’s the dad?”

Bringing a hand up to Cassie’s hair, Janet answered with determined ease, “Daniel.” Cassie shot up out of her arms, gaping.

“Daniel Jackson?”

“Do we know any other Daniels?”

“Mom.” Janet grimaced.

“Yes, Daniel Jackson.” Cassie got to her knees, poised to spring.

“Is he going to move in? Are you going to get married?” Cassie gasped. “Do I have to call him Dad?”

“He is not moving in, and you don’t have to call him anything you don’t want to,” Janet said firmly. “And, well- not legally.”

“Not legally what? Married?” Janet pursed her lips, and Cassie gasped again. “Mom? Did you get married?”

“It was a very complicated situation…”

For all that Cassie doted on Janet for the rest of their vacation, she may as well have been Daniel’s daughter. She badgered and mothered her every second of the day, to the point that Janet was almost excited to be back at work where everyone was scared of her. By the time they got back in Janet’s car to drive home, Cassie had run herself so ragged she fell asleep within the first hour. It was a three day drive but Janet made it in two, and when they got home in the wee hours of the morning of Janet’s last day off, she finally felt like she had truly returned to Earth. 

Before poking Cassie awake, she laid her hand on her stomach and whispered, “Welcome home.”

Daniel’s car on the curb should not have been a surprise. Janet hadn’t told anyone when they were coming back, but anyone capable of making a reasonable assumption would be able to guess.

She and Cassie had gone out for groceries after sleeping in until noon, and when they returned Daniel was waiting for them on the porch. He shot to his feet as Janet parked, and he got halfway to the car before Cassie jumped into his arms. The intense look he’d been leveling at Janet broke and softened into a warm smile as he returned Cassie’s hug. “Hey, Cassie. How was vacation?”

Cassie shrugged. “Fine. Mom got bored, but I liked not having homework.”

“I bet. Oh, Janet-” Janet surfaced from the trunk with her arms full of grocery bags. “Let me help.” 

“Daniel, it’s fine-” He paid her no heed, plucking the bags from her hands and slipping a few more onto his wrists before asking Cassie to unlock the door. Janet sighed, grabbed the last few bags, and followed him.

As she had been made to promise several times, Cassie held her tongue about Janet’s pregnancy. She had more than enough to talk about; she hardly took a breath as Janet and Daniel put away groceries. Janet hadn’t realized how accustomed Daniel was to her house, but he never asked her where anything went as he shelved and nodded along to Cassie’s stories. It wasn’t a large pantry and they were practically flush back against each other, and Janet’s breathing ticked up at the shift of the muscles in his back as he reached for the top shelf.

“Here Daniel, this goes over the cereal,” Cassie handed in a box of pasta and Daniel turned to tuck it into place over Janet’s head. His chest brushed her shoulders and heat radiated off of him, or maybe that was Janet- She edged out of the pantry and found Cassie giving her an evil grin.

“Is that everything?” Daniel asked, breaking off the devastating glare Janet was building up.

“Yep!” Cassie said brightly. “Can you stay for dinner?” It was unfair for Janet to want to ground her into next month- she had been planning on asking the same question, only with a lot more agonizing in advance.

“Well, I was actually going to ask if I could take you ladies out tonight,” Daniel asked with a smile that made Janet’s stomach melt. “Or order something in, if you’re tired.” Cassie perked up.

“Pizza?” She and Daniel looked to Janet as one, identical excited puppy looks on their faces, and Janet wondered briefly which one had taught the other the expression. “Mom?”

Janet slapped on a smile. “Pizza sounds great.”

Cassie, evidently, didn’t have any more tricks up her sleeve and didn’t give Janet so much as a sideways glance all through dinner. She and Daniel had plenty to talk about- besides Janet, SG1 were the only people on Earth around whom Cassie could completely let down her guard. Daniel got to hear about the last four months in painstaking detail, responding with appropriate shock to all the middle school drama. When Cassie told him about Jack and Teal’c taking her out for her birthday, Daniel met Janet’s eyes. Janet gave him a little smile, thinking of music and dancing and a blindfold, but looked away seconds later.

“Turns out they had a party on Edora too,” Daniel said. “Not quite like that, though…”

Besides occasional commentary on a few of Daniel’s stories, Janet kept herself to the sidelines and just listened. Watching Cassie unwind and brighten under Daniel’s attention settled her in a way nothing else had, and overwhelming fondness for her daughter couldn’t help but spill over to her conversation partner. Janet tried to keep it off her face, but whenever Daniel met her gaze, his eyes were soft.

SG1 were Cassie’s family, almost as much as Janet was, and it tugged at Janet’s heart that half of her safest, most trusted people had been gone for so long. It didn’t show in Cassie’s face; she bubbled as happily as ever as Daniel drew more details from her about the new band she and her friends were listening to. Janet watched as Daniel paid Cassie all the loving attention he always did, and told herself again to get a grip.

“All right,” Janet interrupted eventually, when most of the pizza was gone and Cassie was on the verge of yet another chapter in the saga of her best friend’s newest crush. Jack Jr. gnawed on a pizza crust Daniel had snuck him. “Time to get the rest of this in the fridge before it spoils. And time for you, young lady, to go to bed.”

“Mom, can’t I stay up just a little longer?” Cassie gave Daniel a sneaky look. “Just a few more minutes?” she asked hopefully, but Janet shook her head. 

“Teeth. Pajamas. Bed. You have school in the morning, remember?”

“You have work,” Cassie retorted, but Janet raised her eyebrows. With a groan, Cassie slumped off to dispose of her dishes, grousing all the way up the stairs until she yelled, “Good night!”

“Good night!” Daniel and Janet called back in unison, and Janet put down the little flutter in her chest to heartburn.

Ever the gentleman, Daniel helped her with the rest of the dishes and found some way to squeeze the last few slices of pizza into the newly stuffed fridge. He slammed the door before anything could topple out, and winced at the ensuing clatter. “Maybe be careful opening that.”

Janet sighed, thinking of the blueberry and milk combination that had been driving her from bed every midnight on the dot for the last three days. She already knew she would risk the avalanche- if her baby wanted vitamin C and calcium, who was she to say no? “I’ll get through somehow.” She wiped down the edge of the sink for the third time, trying not to turn around as Daniel went still.

“Janet, I think we need to-”

“I’m tired, Daniel.” Janet straightened, staring out over the sink. “It was good to see you, but I really think-”

“Why did you leave without saying goodbye?” Janet fell silent, twisting her hands around her soaked dishrag. The floor creaked as Daniel took a step in her direction. “If you needed space to think, or reconnect with Cassie, I could understand. But why not just tell me that?”

Because if she had looked into his eyes, she wouldn’t have been able to leave him behind. As soon as she had gotten that positive test she had known it would be that much harder to keep her distance. But she didn’t have just herself to worry about anymore.

“You’re right, I did need space. And time. And I did a lot of thinking while I was gone, Daniel, and-” She mustered all her courage and turned to face him, and her breath caught as she momentarily lost her train of thought. He was less than a foot away, looming over her with a pained, confused look on his face. Janet wanted to kiss away the crease in his brow, the uncertainty in his eyes, the tension in his mouth, and for a second it was almost painful not to reach out and touch him.

Daniel took another step forward, still not touching, but less than a breath of space between them. “What were you thinking?” Two weeks of practice went out the window; all she could do was stare up at him as her mind fought to reassemble itself. Daniel broke eye contact and Janet could breathe, he trailed his fingers down her arm and her chest tightened again. He watched his hand stroking up and down and Janet didn’t shiver, but it was a close thing. “I did some thinking too, and I came down to two possibilities.”

“And?” Janet hated the waver in her voice, how it made Daniel flick his eyes to hers and straighten as if she had just confirmed something.

“One, you didn’t mean it when you said you loved me.” He rested his hand on her cheek, brushing his thumb over her cheekbone. “Or two, you thought I didn’t.” Janet pressed her lips together to keep them from quivering and her nostrils flared. Daniel brought his other hand up to her face, held her so she couldn’t look away. “I love you. That hasn’t changed, no matter where we are.”

Oh, she believed him, up to her ears and down to the tips of her toes she felt the conviction in his words. But that wasn’t the only truth at play. “Everything else has.”

“Nothing else-”

“I’m pregnant.” He froze, hands on her face and a protest on his lips. His wide blue eyes blinked down at her, unseeing.

“Pregnant?”

“Yes.” His face was never this blank and Janet wanted to squirm away but she found herself under the same spell he was- she couldn’t move an inch. 

“With a baby?” Janet rolled her eyes and huffed.

“Yes, Daniel, with a baby.” Slowly, dazedly, a smile spread across his face. But he blinked and focused in on her again, and his smile faded.

“Why do you say it like it’s a bad thing?”

“It’s not.” She wrapped her arms around her stomach and finally broke away, taking a few steps back as Daniel stayed rooted in place. “But it changes things.”

“What does it change? Janet, I love you, I don’t care how many times I have to say it-”

“It’s not about that.” Janet’s voice rose sharply and Daniel fell silent with a wary, dark look. “It’s not about me, and it’s not about you.”

“You know I love Cassie, too,” he protested immediately, and Janet wished he couldn’t follow her thinking so easily. It would be much easier to pretend their whole relationship had been a convenience if he didn’t know her better than anyone else. “And I’ll love this baby, you know I-”

“But we won’t be first.” That took the air right out of his lungs. He gave her a look of such dejected betrayal Janet almost closed her eyes to block it out.

“That’s not fair.”

“None of this is fair,” Janet hissed, and he scowled. “I have to think of my children first, Daniel. We can’t all wait around for you to decide we’re not enough.”

“I would never-”

“You’ve searched for three years, Daniel. Forgive me if I find it hard to believe you won’t go running back when you do manage to find her.” And it was when, not if. If Janet was sure of anything, she could be sure that Daniel Jackson would save Sha’re. It was all he had lived and breathed for since she had met him.

“I told you, I’m not who I was.” Janet quirked a sad smile.

“Somehow, I don’t think she’ll mind.” Daniel opened and closed his mouth several times, face darkening with frustration as he failed to find the words. Janet wanted to take his hand, but knew she wouldn’t be able to stop there if she took a single step forward. “I don’t blame you for it,” she said softly. “You love your wife, I can hardly be upset at you for that.” Daniel clenched his jaw, struggling to contradict her. It sparked a painful little bloom of love in Janet’s chest that he couldn’t find it in himself to lie to her, even now.

Janet laid a hand on her belly and Daniel’s eyes honed in on it. “I’m more upset with myself than anything else,” she said with a sigh. “But what’s done is done.” For a split-second she flashed back to that last sunny evening on Edora, the blanket that had been waiting for Daniel on the table, the ecstatic smile and long celebration Janet had anticipated. She shook the thought away. “I have to consider-”

“That I love you, and your children? And I want to be with you? Have you considered that?” Janet shook her head, pursing her lips.

“I have to consider the possibility that when you find her, you’ll realize you can’t live without her. And it won’t just be me that loses you.” She swallowed. “I can’t let you do that to Cassie.”

“Janet-”

“It’s who you are, Daniel, I won’t ask you to be different.” Janet squared her shoulders and forced a hard look. “But I will ask you to leave.”

“I’m not going to-”

“Please.” It came out ragged and hoarse, all the pain and fear she’d kept locked down for two weeks. She took a breath and tried again, barely more than a whisper. “Please.”

Daniel searched her face for a long, tense moment, and Janet was almost sure he would refuse again, and it would be her breaking point. But he strode out the door and slammed it behind him, and Janet’s knees gave out. She gripped the counter, fighting back tears and reminding herself, unconvincingly, that this was exactly what she had wanted.

Sam took the news with a modicum of grace, but didn’t bother restraining her shock. “Pregnant?” she squeaked. “With whose-?” Her gasp shook the whole couch and Janet pursed her lips. Cassie bounced in her seat, having begged to stay for the conversation this time. Janet had agreed only after forcing Cassie to agree to eat a whole serving of salad- after being spoiled by her grandparents, all the fast food on the road, and pizza with Daniel, Cassie hadn’t set eyes on a vegetable in weeks.

“Daniel?” Sam’s voice was hushed. “You and Daniel-?”

“Yes,” Janet said crisply, and tried to leave it there, but Cassie could never allow her more than a moment’s peace.

“And they got married!” she squealed, and if Sam’s eyes had been wide before, now they were halfway out of her skull.

“Married-? Janet, what the hell happened on that planet?” If Janet hadn’t been pre-irritated by Cassie’s badgering she would have felt bad for the emotional whiplash she was giving her best friend. As it was, she only scowled.

“What it sounds like.” Sam just gaped at her, and Janet rolled her eyes. “They made us get married to live together.”

“Well, why did you have to live together?” Sam asked, and it was such a sensible question Janet wanted the couch to swallow her whole. It had felt much more vital on Edora, where Daniel was the only familiar thing on an alien world.

“We couldn’t live off the kindness of strangers,” Janet said, thinking of Laira’s insistence that they could stay as long as they liked. “And it would have been a waste of resources to make two houses.” Her injuries wouldn’t have allowed it at that point, anyway. She had been hobbling around far earlier than she would have recommended to any other patient, but she had been nowhere near returned to baseline when Daniel finished the house. He had never tried to get her to admit it, but she wouldn’t have managed by herself, and with the way he worked himself to the bone, he wouldn’t have, either. They had kept each other in check, noticing the exhaustion in the other long before they would have admitted it in themselves.

“So what, you got married because you had to, and then somewhere along the way…?”

“Essentially,” Janet ground out between her teeth, with a glance at an entirely too gleeful Cassie. Sam swallowed, looking chastened.

“Wow. You know, whenever I imagined the two of you stuck on that planet, that’s-” Sam cleared her throat. “-not quite what I pictured.”

“You and me both,” Janet grumbled. Sam straightened with a frown.

“Wait a minute, is that why he’s been so awful the last two weeks?” Janet tilted her head.

“What do you mean?”

“Janet, he’s been terrible, he’s been moping around the base all day and refusing to speak to anyone. The Colonel said-” Sam cut herself off, pink rising in her cheeks, and Janet raised her eyebrows. “Well, he said Daniel must have left some girl behind on Edora.” Janet snorted.

“He would say that.”

“Well, I would never be one to recommend Colonel O’Neill’s interpersonal skills-” Cassie snickered, and Sam cracked a smile. “But it sounds like he wasn’t too far off. Except, uh-” Sam glanced at Cassie. “Some girl left him behind on Earth.” Janet’s eyes shot to hers, mouth already opened with a heated protest, but she fell silent at Sam’s appraising look.

“Bedtime,” she said curtly, and this time Cassie’s only protest was an eyeroll.

Sam stayed silent as she helped with the dishes and leftovers, and Janet’s skin crawled under her scrutiny.

“Is that why you avoided him all day?” Sam asked eventually, and Janet grimaced. Her first day back had been as awkward and stilted as she had expected, though her staff had been nothing but welcoming. She’d gotten more hugs in one day than she had in the previous three years combined, and more than once Janet had gone to do her daily checks and regular reports only to find them already completed, her nurses bustling to find something else to do to make her day easier. She had appreciated the thought, but it had left her with very little to do besides shut herself up in her office and hold her breath whenever Daniel knocked. He had been relentless, chasing her down whenever she slipped away, but she had managed to get through the day without speaking to him.

“I wasn’t exaggerating when I said he’s been terrible,” Sam said. “I don’t think he spoke more than three words to anyone, he just holed up in his office translating… something old.”

“He got two weeks vacation, he should have taken it.” He had needed it far more than she had with the amount of physical labor he had pushed himself through. The change in his muscles had been visible, Janet had felt the tone and size of them under her hands…

“Well, yeah, but it’s Daniel,” Sam said like it explained everything, and Janet cleared her throat.

“We both had a lot to think about.”

“Yeah, I guess.” Sam’s voice was uncertain but Janet didn’t meet her eyes, instead rooting around for a glass. “Janet?”

“Hm?” Janet filled her glass with water and took a sip, making a great effort to still her trembling hands.

“Are you happy about the baby?” Something unspooled in Janet’s shoulders, and she stared down at her water. When she spoke, her voice was small.

“Yes.”

“Are you happy that it’s Daniel’s?” Sam pushed, and Janet tapped her glass for something to do with her hands.

“I guess I wouldn’t want it to be anyone else,” she said, just as quietly.

“Then what’s the issue? Did you not want kids?” Sam sounded genuinely confused, and Janet wished she had a more succinct explanation for why she couldn't just let herself and Daniel be happy.

“I always wanted kids,” she said, and took another sip of water before she went on. “But when I got divorced I never really pictured myself getting married again, and I wasn’t really interested in raising a kid by myself, so…”

“But you’ve done such a great job with Cassie,” Sam protested, and Janet smiled.

“That wasn’t exactly planned. The best thing that ever happened to me,” she rushed to clarify, “but still. Not at all what I pictured.” 

Sam looked down at Janet’s stomach and frowned like it was a particularly difficult equation. “This wasn’t either, I guess.” Janet’s smile turned sardonic.

“Definitely not.” Sam leaned back against the counter, arms crossed.

“You’re gonna do a great job,” she said after a long moment, and Janet’s eyes burned.

“Thanks.” Sam reached for her and Janet didn’t bother to keep the tears in check as she fell into Sam’s embrace. Arms tight around her, Sam didn’t let go for a long time, pressing her cheek to Janet’s head as if she would evaporate if she let go.

“Daniel would, too, you know,” Sam said softly, and Janet sighed.

“I know.” She pulled back and wiped her face. “I’m not going to keep him from his baby.” She hadn’t known it until she said it, but of course it was the truth. She knew Daniel would love this baby with all his heart, just as he loved Cassie. And me, Janet’s heart whispered, but she shoved the thought away. “I just can’t believe he isn’t going to regret giving up on Sha’re. I can’t-” She blew out a breath, and Sam watched her with piercing eyes. “I can’t live on eggshells, waiting for him to change his mind.”

“What if he doesn’t?” Sam asked. “Has it occurred to you at all that he might choose you?”

“No,” Janet said honestly. “That’s not who he is.” She turned to her spotless kitchen, searching for something to do with her hands, anything to keep from meeting Sam’s eyes. “He’s going to find her, and he’s going to choose her, and anything else is wishful thinking.”

Sam cocked a little smile. “I don’t know if you’ve heard, but the SGC pretty much lives on wishful thinking.”

Janet didn’t know how she managed it, but over several weeks she reintegrated back into life at the SGC as if she had never left. There were always patients to treat and it was far easier to fall into her old self when there was work to do. SG teams went through the gate and came back in pieces, and Janet settled into putting them back together with the fond exasperation they had all become accustomed to. Her staff were as excellent as ever, anticipating her every need without missing a beat, and by the time six weeks had gone by Janet remembered exactly why she had never been able to leave this post, even with a child at home.

Her work here was important, the lives she saved and cures she discovered had a real time impact on everyone she cared about. Of course that didn’t make private practice or work in a large hospital unworthy, but in all her years practicing medicine, Janet had never been so fulfilled as she was on the cutting edge of discovery. The men and women who went through the gate knew and took comfort in the fact that she would be there waiting for them when they got back, and that mattered.

Not everything went back to the way it was before, of course. General Hammond beamed when he congratulated her, kissed her on the cheek, and ordered her to call him, day or night, if she needed anything. Jack gaped and Teal’c raised an eyebrow, a tiny curve to his lips that Janet recognized as deep happiness. Some of the newer personnel made faces at each other behind her back, only to be firmly brought back to respectful deference with one glare from their more seasoned superiors. The other doctors and nurses treated her as they always had, with a small uptick in reminders to sit down and offers to bring her whatever meal she had missed.

Daniel was as frequent a patient as ever, though Janet had transferred primary care to Dr. Warner and tried to avoid him as much as possible. The air shifted when he was there, the staff more tight-lipped and patients more nervous. Daniel was absolutely no help- staring at her whenever she was in sight, hands clenched whenever anyone else offered to carry heavy equipment or see a quarantined patient for her.

He never seemed to be far- if he was on-world he was loitering around the infirmary, checking up on personnel from other teams that he had never spoken to otherwise. He didn’t go so far as confronting her in her own infirmary, but some days Janet almost wished he would. If he could give her one reason, any reason, to sour the aching love she just couldn’t squash, a lot of her problems would go away. 

But he was as considerate as he was infuriating- checking on her through Sam, leaving snacks in her office when she wasn’t there- and every day Janet wondered how much longer she could possibly hold herself in check. It should have been easy enough, with him married to someone else, but that wasn’t how he behaved. He could have been courting her, as out of order as it was in their odd relationship. Normally, wooing preceded marriage and pregnancy, but Daniel didn’t seem to have gotten the memo. He turned up for dinner at least once a week, arms laden with ice cream or chips or whatever else he had noticed her inhaling in the commissary. Faced with Cassie’s excitement, Janet could hardly turn him away. But she never let him stay after Cassie went to bed, either, knowing that darkness and privacy would be more than enough to make her do something incredibly stupid. Her growing belly was proof that she’d already made enough bad decisions.

Daniel’s undisguised wonder at the changes to her body lit a fire deep inside that made it that much harder to send him away. The most drastic change was in her fifteenth week- within days she went from being able to squeeze into her uniform to not being able to hide her belly under her white coat. Sam grinned and said the baby must have run out of room to grow up and could only grow out, and Teal’c told her she looked well. Cassie couldn’t keep her hands off the bump, and Daniel’s eyes always tightened at the sight. 

Janet knew how badly he wanted to touch her- she wanted it almost as badly- but she never let him get that close.

When the SOS came through from Abydos, Janet watched from the control room as SG1 sprinted through the gate and felt as though she had finally fallen off a ledge. Whatever was going to happen, it was going to happen now.

Wounded Abydonians came through first, and Janet started triaging before SG1 made it back through the gate. She half-expected the gate to whoosh to a close without Daniel, and blinked at the sight of his pale face as he stepped onto the ramp. He was carrying something behind him, and as it came into view Janet recognized it as a litter. She made it a few steps up the ramp before she saw that the patient’s face was covered, and that it was not, in fact, a patient at all. Teal’c came into view carrying the other end of the litter, and with a nod from Jack, the gate sputtered out behind him.

“Jones, Drescher,” Janet called, and two of her orderlies popped to their feet. She gestured towards Daniel and Teal’c, keeping her eyes on Daniel and trying not to look at the still form covered in a dusty tarp. “Morgue, please.”

Daniel hesitated, but let them take the litter from his hands. “You can go with her, Daniel,” Janet said quietly, and he gave her a look of such pain and confusion her breath caught in her chest.

“DanielJackson is in need of medical attention,” Teal’c said gravely, and took Daniel’s arm when he tried to protest. “I will escort him to the infirmary.” With a practiced eye, Janet looked over Daniel from top to bottom, noted the red eyes and slumped shoulders, how he swayed before Teal’c got a decent hold on him.

“All right,” Janet said with a nod. Daniel tried to protest, but he may as well have been arguing with a tsunami. Teal’c swept him away without another word, and Janet watched until the doors to the embarkation room slid closed behind them.

By the time Janet made it down to the infirmary with all the other patients, Daniel had been cleared of everything except exhaustion. He tucked himself out of the way and watched as Janet bandaged, splinted, and soothed the dozen frightened Abydonians who had come under her care. Before long, her last patient was discharged to lay down in temporary quarters, and Janet rolled her neck in the silence of the empty infirmary.

“You should sit down.” Almost empty. She gave him a soft, tired smile.

“I’m fine. You’re the one who should be resting.” Daniel shrugged and looked at the floor, hands deep in his pockets. The torment and indecision of the last several weeks was gone, all Janet felt as she looked at him was aching tenderness.

“I’m so sorry, Daniel.” Daniel swallowed, and when he looked up at her his eyes were shining.

“Thank you, “ he said hoarsely, and forced a watery smile.

“I’m, um-” Her own eyes burned, but she took a deep breath through her nose and firmly shifted into the CMO of the SGC. “I’m going to have to remove the symbiote, to confirm death.” Daniel nodded once, a jerky motion. “Are there any cultural practices I should be aware of? Any-” She cleared her throat. “Any personal preferences she would have had?”

Daniel shook his head. “Technically only direct family is supposed to touch the body, but I assume you’re going to wear gloves, so…” He sniffed and squared his shoulders. “Does it have to be you?” He glanced at her stomach. “I wouldn’t want anything to happen-”

“We’ll take the same precautions as always,” Janet promised. “And- well, not to pat myself on the back- but I have done this more than anyone else, I’m the closest thing we have to an expert.” Janet flexed her fingers and reminded herself Daniel probably didn’t see expertise in number of cadavers cut open. “Unless you’d like someone else-?”

“No. No, it’s fine.” His face softened, but he couldn’t quite manage another smile. “Thank you.”

It wasn’t necessary to uncover more than Sha’re’s abdomen to conduct her exam and the following removal. A quick x-ray confirmed the Goa’uld’s presence, and it was short work to surgically remove the parasite from Sha’re’s spine. Janet made as small an incision as possible and took extra care with her stitches. The position made it impossible to hide them, but she did make them as unobtrusive as she could. 

Only when the Goa’uld had been contained and cut open to confirm death did Janet finally turn, take a deep breath, and gently fold down the drape over Sha’re’s face. She kept her gloves on per Daniel’s instructions and laid a hand on Sha’re’s head. 

She was as beautiful as Daniel had always described her, thick dark curls cascading over her shoulders. Janet could easily picture her full lips curved in a smile, her eyebrows raised as Daniel went on for hours about ancient Egypt. Or maybe she had watched him dreamily, understanding every other word and just enjoying the sound of his voice. 

Overall, she looked terribly young. Janet stroked her hair and wished that so many things could have been different. 

“I’m so sorry, sweetie,” Janet said softly, and pulled the drape up over her face. 

By the time she scrubbed out of the morgue and changed out of her scrubs, hours had passed since the first Abydonians came through the wormhole. Janet organized the next few hours into a to do list- round on her patients, write her charts, track down SG1-

“Daniel!” She laid a hand on her racing heart, and he took half a step forward, looking apologetic for startling her. He had been leaning against the doorway of the morgue, and Janet couldn’t guess how long he’d been standing there or how long he intended to stay. “What are you doing?” Daniel shrugged and fell back against the wall. 

“Is Amaunet-?”

“Dead,” Janet said with finality, no room for argument. Daniel nodded. 

“Good.” He stared down at the floor, and Janet took the opportunity just to look at him. She tracked the unkempt tufts of his hair down the furrow of his brow, the lines around his mouth and the slope of his shoulders. Love and hurt for him swirled in her stomach, and for once Janet didn’t try to force it away. She laid her hands on her belly- it had popped out just enough to be a decent shelf. 

“I wanted to thank you,” Daniel said, still frowning at the ground. “For taking care of her.”

“Daniel, you don’t have to-”

“I heard what you said.” Janet hated the way he looked up at her, like she had done more than any other doctor would have done. “I’m just- I’m sorry it was you, but I’m also glad. If that makes sense.” 

Janet’s lips twitched. “Not really.” Daniel’s eyes wandered to her belly, her hands resting protectively over it. “But you’re welcome.”

She had never given him time to look at her like this- even when he was over for dinner she kept on the move and made sure Cassie didn’t stop talking for long. But his gaze didn’t prickle the way it normally did, it just settled heavily on her shoulders until she felt how very tired she was. 

“If you don’t have other plans,” Janet said softly, “I know Cassie would love to see you for dinner tonight.” She touched his arm, the first contact she had allowed herself since returning from Edora. “I don’t think you should be alone.”

Daniel searched her face for a long moment. He nodded. 

True to expectation, Cassie was as happy to see Daniel as ever. But she sensed his mood immediately and it set her on edge, wide eyes bouncing between him and Janet as they picked around each other. Once Cassie established the rest of SG1 was okay, she stayed relatively quiet for the rest of dinner and excused herself to go do homework. She hugged Daniel goodnight, and squeezed him for an extra few seconds before giving Janet a peck on the cheek and darting up the stairs with Jack Jr. on her heels. 

“I didn’t mean to scare her,” Daniel said quietly. “She worries more than any kid should have to.”

“She’ll be all right.” Janet heaved to her feet and reached for Cassie’s plate, but Daniel shot up and beat her to it. Deaf to her protests, Daniel cleared the table and had the leftovers mostly packed away before Janet could make it to the kitchen. Conceding defeat, Janet flopped onto a stool at the kitchen island and watched as Daniel rinsed the dishes and loaded the dishwasher. He had been like that from before Edora- always searching for a way to be helpful. Janet had seen the same behavior from Cassie at first, until she learned to believe that she didn’t have to earn her place. 

When he was done with the dishes Daniel looked around at the rest of the kitchen, hands twitching. He wet a paper towel and attacked the microwave door, and Janet decided to intervene. “You don’t have to do that.” She maneuvered off the stool and laid a hand on his back, and he went very still. “Why don’t you sit down on the couch, I’m sure I have some ice cream in the freezer somewhere…”

“Can I stay here tonight?” Daniel asked, and Janet blinked. He turned, and Janet’s fingers trailed across his back at the motion. “I just-” He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You’re right. I don’t want to be alone right now.”

Janet didn’t answer right away, but she was never going to turn him down. “All right.”

It was earlier than her normal bedtime, but the long and emotionally fraught day dragged at Janet’s bones and it wasn’t long before she led him up the stairs. When she left her bathroom, teeth brushed and makeup scrubbed off, she found him sitting on the edge of her guest bed, staring into space. 

“Daniel?” He blinked and looked up at her. “What are you doing?” Not understanding the question, he frowned. 

“I- well I assumed-” Janet jerked her head down the hall, one hand rubbing her belly absentmindedly. 

“Don’t be silly. Come on.” Daniel shifted uncomfortably, hands clenched together in his lap. 

“Janet, I’m not asking-” 

“And I’m not offering.” Janet cocked an eyebrow and held out her hand. “Just- come on.” For a long moment he stared at her, brow furrowed. But eventually he got to his feet, trudged across the floor, and took her hand. For the first time that day, the contact sparked a little zing of energy down her arm, but Janet didn’t dwell on it. She led Daniel into her room and turned down the covers. 

“I hope you don’t plan on sleeping in your boots,” she said lightly as she crawled into bed. “Unless you also plan on doing my laundry.” It was an empty threat- he could have flopped down beside her covered in mud and she would have been glad to have him close- but it seemed to bring him back to Earth. He stripped down to his boxers and slipped under the covers behind her. 

Janet determinedly did not picture him lying in her bed, the contours of his chest, the warmth that radiated off his skin. He snaked a tentative arm over her waist, and she didn’t have to imagine anything. Well as he knew the landscape of her body, he paused at her belly. Janet took his hand and laid it over the swell of her stomach. He let out a little puff of air and spread his fingers, taking in as much as possible. There wasn’t anything to feel yet, only the fact that she was bigger, but still he touched her like she was a rare, priceless artifact. 

“Janet?”

Janet stirred, already well on her way to the deepest sleep she’d enjoyed in some time. “Hmm?” Daniel didn’t continue for a moment, instead tracing patterns over her belly. 

“Thank you.” He didn’t say whether it was for letting him stay, or letting him touch her, or for carrying his baby in general, and Janet didn’t ask. 

She threaded her fingers through his own- his patterns were starting to tickle- and closed her eyes.

“Remind me again why we’re doing this when the doc has-” Jack checked his watch. “About four months left to cook?” Daniel shoved his glasses up his face, glaring at a stubbornly sealed can of paint. 

“Because four months, for us, equates to about two weeks off on-world,” he responded, cautiously attempting to pry the paint open without slopping it down his front. Janet had spread tarp over every inch of the carpet- Jack had looked insulted by her thoroughness- but he didn’t feel like trying to scrape it out of his shirt. “Might as well get it done while we have the time.”

“Indeed.” Teal’c stared intensely at the fresh layer of paint on the wall, wearing a bandana to protect his bald head from flecks of blue. It was a bright, misty color that reminded Daniel of the ocean, and Cassie had insisted it would be suitable for either gender. “The process is most laborious.”

“It’s paint, Teal’c.” Jack scratched at his face and grimaced at the blue under his fingernails. “We’re not running a marathon.”

“Sort of feels like it, though.” Daniel peeled the lid off and breathed a sigh of relief when all the contents stayed inside. “Maybe it’s the fumes.” 

“Oh, not this again. If you want to go be nosy next door just say so.” Daniel opened his mouth to protest and Jack waved him off. “Go get us something to drink while you’re at it.”

Daniel weighed his options, shrugged, and ambled out the door. He ignored Jack explaining the colloquial meaning of the word “whipped” as he left. 

Next door was a much more organized operation. Sam had a deep furrow in her brow as she screwed a bassinet together, glancing at the instruction pamphlet Cassie was holding up as she went. Janet supervised cross-legged on the bed, sorting impossibly tiny clothes into piles. She was in a maternity t-shirt with one of Daniel’s button-ups thrown over top, sleeves rolled half-way up just to uncover her hands. A little brown blanket sat folded by itself, freshly laundered and ready for the bassinet. 

“All right, A to A, B to B- where’s C?” Sam muttered, and as she looked around for whatever part she needed she caught sight of Daniel leaning on the doorframe. “Oh, hey Daniel. How’s it going next door?”

“Oh, you know, tearing of clothes, beating of chests, all that macho stuff,” Daniel said with a shrug. Janet glanced up at him with a sparkling grin that made his chest swell. 

“Jumping ship?” she teased, and Daniel tilted his head as if he were considering it. 

“Somehow I don’t think I’d survive Jack’s hurt feelings.” Cassie snickered. “I’m running downstairs for drinks, would any of you like anything?” Sam asked for a Coke, already focused back on her task, and Cassie gave Janet a sidelong glance. Janet sighed and nodded, and Cassie repeated Sam’s request. 

“Janet?”

“I’ll just come with you.” Janet set a onesie aside and began the labor-intensive process of climbing off the bed. 

“I can get it,” Daniel said in a rush, vaulting over Sam to keep Janet from standing. “It’s fine-”

“You won’t get it right,” Cassie said without looking up from her pamphlet. “You might as well just let her do it.”

“I’m five months pregnant, I’m not an invalid,” Janet said dryly, though she took his offered hand to haul herself to her feet. He tried to help her to the door and she batted him away. “You can help by closing the nursery door.”

Without a word Daniel scampered down the hall and pulled the offending door shut, muttering “sorry guys” and not responding to Jack’s “oh come on, what are you trying to do, fumigate us?”

Janet made her way down the hall after giving the air a few seconds to clear. Only a few minutes in the room on their first painting attempt had given her a splitting headache, which was how it had become a team effort. That, and SG1 never turned down pizza and beer. 

Daniel retrieved everyone’s drinks from the fridge before Janet made it down the stairs, but he wasn’t in any rush to deliver them. Bemused, he watched as Janet collected Coke, cranberry juice, and whipped cream. Jack Jr. whuffled from his dog bed, but knew better than to try begging Janet for any whipped cream. She took as much care in the measuring and mixing of her concoction as Daniel had seen her give to patients on the verge of death, and by the time she took a tentative sip he almost thought she was about to present him with the cure for cancer. 

“Is it good?” Janet drank deeply, eyes closed in bliss, and didn’t answer right away. She sighed and smacked her lips. 

“Just what the doctor ordered,” she said, and patted her bump. She raised her eyebrows, looking down as though the bump were speaking to her. “You liked it, too.”

“Is he moving?” Daniel fought the urge to drop all the bottles and rush at her belly. He was allowed to touch it now and often took advantage of the privilege, but he held back for fear of smothering her. He never reached for her in the infirmary, knowing her professional image was important to her, but now that she had popped to the point of being impossible to hide, his hands tingled whenever he was around her. It had become his favorite way to sleep- nose in her hair and one hand on her belly. 

“Mm-hm.” Janet rubbed her belly and she frowned. Her eyes widened. “Daniel, come here.” She held out a hand, and with a great clattering of putting down bottles, Daniel took it. She tugged him closer and laid his hand on her stomach, brow furrowed in concentration. 

For a moment they stood in silence, and just as Daniel opened his mouth to ask what, exactly, they were waiting for- “What-? Oh! Oh my- is that-?” Fluent as he was in over a dozen languages, he could not string one coherent sentence together. The odd little nudge from beneath her skin receded, and Daniel gaped at Janet in absolute wonder. She grinned up at him, radiant with joy at finally being able to share this with him. 

“I love you.” He hadn't meant for it to sound so intense- hadn’t meant to say it at all, except it had spilled over to the point it was impossible not to say it. She didn’t recoil as he had feared, but her smile faded as she scrutinized his face. Daniel wrapped his other hand around her waist and drew her closer. “I love you, Janet.”

Her hands slid up his chest, just to rest there and fiddle with his t-shirt. She frowned up at him for several contemplative seconds before she spoke. 

“Are you going to your apartment tonight?” Daniel blinked several times, until he was sure he hadn’t misheard. 

“I- well, I should probably do laundry.” He nodded at the overlarge shirt draped over her shoulders. “My clothes keep disappearing.” She didn’t smile and it made him fidget. 

“You could do laundry here.”

“I- I wouldn’t want to impose-”

“Daniel.” Her eyes bore up into his, chin tucked down with a tiny hint of bashfulness. “You could go get your things, and come back here.” There was already a duffel bag at the foot of her bed that Sam had tactfully chosen not to remark upon, and Daniel frowned as he tried to piece out her meaning. 

“I could.” Pink bloomed in Janet’s cheeks, and Daniel’s brain went into overdrive before screeching to a halt. “You mean- all of my things?” Janet bit her lip, idly tapping at his chest. “You know that would take more than one trip, right?” Janet pursed her lips. Daniel tightened his arms around her until her belly was pressed against him. “You’re- just to be clear- you’re asking me to move in?”

“If you’re ready,” she said, and Daniel wondered if she noticed the tremor in her voice. “And if you want to. You don’t have to-”

“Oh no no no no-” The offer was out, she was not taking it back- “I absolutely, 100%-” He fell silent, already on to the next problem. “Wait a minute, did you think I wouldn’t want to?” Janet shrugged and picked at a blue fleck on his shirt. 

“I don’t know, I haven’t exactly made things easy for you. And I wanted to give you time.” Daniel’s chest warmed until it was almost burning, and it took everything in him not to grab her face and kiss her senseless. All the ground he’d gained to be part of her life- and Cassie’s- he had done so slowly. 

He didn’t know how to explain it to her in a way she would believe, it all sounded far too convenient. Jack was still half-convinced that Daniel’s vision from Sha’re had only been a dream, and even Daniel had to admit that it wasn’t enough to plan a mission on. But all the same, he treasured the mental image of Sha’re taking Janet’s hand, smiling down at Daniel in the phantom-infirmary bed, and telling him to be happy. Someday, he would tell Janet, when it didn’t look like he was only doing it to prove a point. 

“I don’t need any more time,” he promised. “I want this life with you, Janet Fraiser.” He smiled and leaned his forehead down to hers. “And Cassie. And this one.” His hand brushed her belly and she sighed. “If you’re ready. And if Cassie’s okay with it.”

Janet rolled her eyes. “Cassie is more than okay with it, she’s been begging me to ask you for two months. And I’m-” She cut herself off, seemingly unsure of how to finish. She swallowed. “I love you. I want this, too.”

Daniel probably had a stupid look on his face- like he was looking at every constellation and da Vinci painting combined. But Janet didn’t mind- she glanced at his lips and smiled back. 

Emboldened, Daniel tilted his head forward, slowly enough that she could back away if she wanted. With a bright smile, Janet leaned forward to meet him, hands creeping up to curl around his collar. 

When he kissed her, it wasn’t exactly how he imagined- on Edora, doubting had been pointless, and affection had been simple. Here, in her home with her daughter up the stairs, Janet stretched up and pressed her lips to his not out of a lack of doubts, but because he had helped her overcome them. Daniel wrapped his arms around her, running his hands over her belly and back and relishing the fact that she didn’t flinch away. 

“Did you guys get lost?” Cassie yelled down the stairs, and Janet grinned against Daniel’s lips. He huffed when she broke away, but she linked her fingers behind his neck, clearly not planning on going anywhere. 

“We’re kissing!” she shouted back, and Daniel’s jaw dropped. “Come get your own drinks!” Daniel wanted to order Cassie to stay upstairs, but he couldn’t quite find his voice. 

“Oh.” Cassie’s voice was smaller, but still audible. Janet raised her eyebrows, expectant. “Carry on, then.”

“Thanks honey, you’re a peach.” Daniel kissed her again almost before she finished speaking, swallowing the surprised noise she made. 

“Still sure you want to get mixed up in all this?” Janet asked when they came up for air, a little breathless. Daniel cupped her face and kissed her eyes and nose, and she melted against him. 

“Absolutely.”