Chapter Text
“Shit, Lenny, quit pulling so hard..”
“You’re being a baby, Sean.”
Sean winced as Lenny ran the brush through his knotted hair again, fighting the urge to yank his head away. “Why did I ever agree to do this?” he thought. “I could’ve brushed my own hair.”
Unfortunately for the Irishman, Lenny had noticed Sean struggling to detangle the back of his hair and offered to help. Sean said yes, but he regretted it instantly when Lenny sat him down in front of him and started pulling the brush through the knots. He had nothing but embarrassment and mild irritation left at this point, so he was just glad Arthur donated enough money to the camp to get more private tents.
“What are you even doing back there?” Sean whined.
Lenny shrugged. “Brushing your hair.”
Sean scoffed at that. Lenny was usually one of, if not his best friend, but he was kind’ve pissing Sean off right now.
After a while of brushing (and a lot of complaints from Sean), his hair was finally calming down a bit, most of the knots gone. Now that the torturing part was over, Sean found himself leaning slightly into Lenny’s touch. The once painful feeling of the hairbrush pulling on his scalp had changed into an almost soothing sensation.
Sean caught himself before he could let out a content sigh and close his eyes, leaning forward. ”Wasn’t I just complaining about this? What the hell am I doing?”
“Sit still, Sean,” Lenny said, dropping the brush to work out a knot with his fingers. “Think you’re almost done.”
“Good.”
Sean refused to acknowledge the part of his brain wishing his hair was a little more tangled just so Lenny could continue brushing his hair in that annoyingly calming way. He didn’t even know why he felt like this. Maybe it was the gentle motion of the hairbrush moving against his scalp, or maybe it was the fact he was already kind’ve tired. He didn’t even choose to think that it might’ve been Lenny’s presence behind him.
“There.” Lenny patted Sean on the shoulder and scooted to his bedroll. “It’s finally over.”
Sean snickered. “You’re saying that like you’re the one who was getting your scalp ripped out.”
“Oh, it was not that bad. And I had to listen to you whine and complain the whole time.”
“Rightfully so.” Sean sprawled out on his own bedroll, stretching and turning on his side so that his back was facing Lenny. “..Thanks,” he added under his breath.
In that moment, curled up next to that infuriatingly beautiful boy who was likely already falling asleep, Sean felt warm, and he hated himself for being so happy about Lenny simply sleeping next to him. ”He ain’t beautiful. Well.. he is, but I can’t think that. I’m a boy and he’s a boy, it’s weird.”
And with those last few hateful thoughts directed at himself, Sean drifted into sleep.
—
“What happened, Sean?” Lenny teased. “Thought you were good at poker.”
“You’re cheating,” Sean accused.
Sean was good at poker. In fact, he was the one winning against Lenny most of the time, but right now he was too absorbed in listening to Lenny talk and studying his face.
”Stupid, stupid, stupid. Quit staring at him, he’s gonna get freaked out. You can’t ruin your whole friendship over a feeling that doesn’t even mean anything,” Sean’s brain snapped at him.
Lenny snorted. “Maybe you’re just losing your spark.”
“Uh-huh,” Sean hummed, shaking his head. “Wait, no I’m not. I’ll be dead and deep in the soil before that happens.” He smirked to try to keep up the prideful demeanor he usually had. His focus shifted back to the table and he realized he hadn’t looked at his cards since Lenny won the last round. “Lord, I need to snap out of this.”
Arthur paused as he walked by, sneering down at Sean’s cards. He huffed. “Don’t think the odds are in your favor, kid.”
“Mhm.”
Sean’s attention was already back on Lenny.
Arthur seemed to pick up quick, realization dawning on his face. “Sean, you wanna go hunting with me?”
“Sure. Wait, what?” Sean threw his cards on the table in forfeit. “We’re in the middle of something. And can’t Charles go with you?”
“He’s busy.”
“Hm?” Charles looked up from where he was making arrows. “I’m free to-“
“Nope, you’re busy,” Arthur interrupted. “C’mon, kid. You’re a good shot, ain’t you?”
Sean shrugged. “I mean, I guess, but..”
Lenny stood up and stretched. “It’s fine, Sean. We can play some other time. Plus, I was gonna go rob a stagecoach.”
“You need anyone to come with you?”
“Nah, I’m going with Hosea.” Lenny patted Sean on the shoulder as he walked away.
”Am I being weird? Does he not want to be around me anymore?” Sean sighed and pushed up from the table, following Arthur to the hitching posts. “Shit, he probably saw me staring.”
—
It wasn’t until the two were far away from camp that Arthur spoke up, “So.. You gonna tell me what the hell that was about?”
“Huh?” Sean blinked. “What was- Oh. Oh, that was nothing. Where are we heading?” He chuckled awkwardly.
“Just down by the river, and I know it wasn’t nothing.”
“What business is it of yours, English?”
Arthur shrugged. “No business of mine, really. I don’t even know why I’m talking to you about this. I just saw you making heart eyes at Lenny and thought.. Maybe I should give you some advice. I don’t know.” He pulled his horse to a stop by a tree and grabbed his rifle.
“Like the shit that brothers do?” Sean raised an eyebrow, dismounting his horse clumsily.
“Yeah, sure, whatever.”
Sean snorted. “What do you know about romance, Morgan?”
“Enough,” Arthur responded, the two heading into the forest to try and track something.
Arthur found deer prints relatively quickly, something he learned from Charles, apparently. “You just gotta show him that you love him. Buy him gifts, cook him food, write him poems, whatever. Just-..”
The man’s words quickly turned to background noise for Sean, who was too busy in his own thoughts to notice or pay attention to anything.
”God, why did I say romance? I don’t love Lenny. As a friend, but only as a friend. Anything else would be weird. I’m weird for even saying that. We’re both men, we can’t love each other. That would just be wrong. Why am I letting Arthur give me advice about this, I don’t need it? I’m weird. This is wrong. I should just-“
“Sean-!”
And then the world disappeared into a blue, wet swirl.