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Bobby wants to show his support, now that he's 95% sure, and it also being June, what's a better time than now?
Seeing them become closer and closer from the increase of handholding to all those times they disappear in a flash for privacy, to interesting makeup color choice, to Rumi finally asking to be in the same changing room, to them now going to bathhouses together, to the whispers and quiet giggles amongst themselves—and the not one but three times Bobby has overheard 'we need to tell him'.
His girls are the best, and sometimes the world doesn't always treat them the best. But he will do everything in his power to show they are accepted and loved, no matter what.
Ok, it's go time. I should have enough time to get everything ready while they're out on a shopping spree.
The last time he saw them coming back from one, Zoey was a walking plushie menagerie, buried under one of every sea animal known to man.
The elevator door opens, and "what the—"
A shriek cuts him off, thankfully, before he breaks his 20-year no-cursing streak.
Slack-jawed and at a loss for words, he squints, and questions start popping up.
Is that a bird?
Wearing a hat?
Perched on top of a blue tiger?
How…
How did…
No wait.
A tiger?
A blue tiger.
In the living room.
Like a house cat.
Why is there a bird wearing a hat sitting on top of a giant blue tiger in the middle of the living room?
What?
Bobby should be running for his life right now. But…
Aren't tigers illegal?
Crap…
I will need to have a serious talk with them about animal laws.
Not to mention one of them dyed it blue!
Wait, it's dyed!
That's going to be another legal headache…
Their career will be a trainwreck if this gets out.
Bobby should really be running right now. But sorting out the legal issues right now is more important than questioning the how or why. He doesn't even bother questioning the reality of the situation, because it's honestly not the weirdest thing he's seen the girls do. What surprises him more is the fact that Mira still doesn't know where the thermostat is.
Maybe this was what the girls wanted to tell me? Even if it is, that doesn't explain the other odd behaviors.
He steps out of the elevator like the basic instinct not to approach a giant, human-killing beast within pouncing distance just… isn’t there.
Dropping all the party supplies off on the counter, he rummages through a pocket.
Bobby » Girls! What have I said about bringing strays home!
Bobby » Where would you even get a tiger?
Bobby » And who dyed it! There are so many laws you're breaking right now!
Rumi » Bobby!
Rumi » We meant to tell you about them! Sorry we didn't tell you
Mira » Don't worry bobby
Mira » It wasn't zoey this time
Mira » We didn't kidnap them from a zoo or anything, and they're not strays
Mira » It's complicated….
Zoey » HEY!!
Zoey » It was one time! And besides, we took snookers back to an animal shelter
Mira » IT WASN'T JUST ONE TIME! DID YOU FORGET ABOUT MR. SHELLY THE IX!!!
Zoey » That was different!
Rumi » GIRLS!
Rumi » We need to get home and explain this to bobby
Rumi » Bobby, sorry we didn't warn you ahead of time. They are safe, you can trust me on that.
Bobby » It's fine
Bobby » We do need to have a talk about how to sort this out, and does Celine know?
Rumi » …
Bobby » Ok, I'm more worried about the blue dye part…
Zoey » Oh don't worry about that, derpy is just naturally like that
Zoey » And the magpie is sussie, she's chill, basically just bird mira
Mira » What's that supposed to mean?
Zoey » :)
Rumi » Anyways, we'll be back soon bobby, derpy and sussie don't need any special treatment, but if they do start doing supernatural things, um, we'll explain when we get back
Bobby » Supernatural? Like the show? Does this mean demons and angels exist?
Zoey » Kinda?
Zoey » We'll explain when we get back, sorry for the trouble bobs
Bobby » You don't have to rush back, I'm just finishing up some work here
Bobby » I'll be sure to keep them company
Ok, so, you aren't dyed, that's one problem solved, I guess?
Still don't know how I'll spin having a giant blue tiger to PR…
I guess that's future Bobby's problem.
I just need to focus on my mission.
Bobby looks up. Derpy and Sussie are nowhere to be found. His eyes scan the living room, nothing. He then turns around and meets another scene that makes him question everything, again.
The banner he brought, the one that said "It's okay to be gay", is being held up at one end by a giant blue paw against a kitchen cabinet, and the rest of it is drooping onto the floor. Derpy is sitting on the counter next to the cabinet, and with that same unnatural smile, his eyes are locked onto Bobby—devoid of any thought. Half of his butt was off the counter, seeing as he's not actually just a regular-sized house cat.
The room is silent for a few heartbeats, Bobby's mind still reeling from this bizarre new sight.
Bobby is the first to break this impromptu staring contest and wonders where Sussie went. He finds her on the counter next to him, holding a roll of tape in her beak, offering it to Bobby. Though now, instead of two, the magpie has upgraded to six judgmental eyes, all trying—and failing—to look like she doesn’t care.
Huh. You do remind me of her.
The elevator chimes.
In a cheery voice, Zoey announces their return, "We're back, Bobby!"
They hear a bang and then a, "DERPY! NO!"
Purple streaks of light flow across the tile floor in front of them.
Instincts fire.
Boots squeak on the floor as they turn the corner, weapons drawn.
Ready to deal with any threat, they assess the scene, searching for any immediate threats.
"Bobby? You ok?" Rumi asks.
The worry and fear drain out of them instantly, but the adrenaline stays behind.
Bobby is kneeling on the floor, caught frozen with hands hovering over a light device on the floor—strobes of rainbow colors cascading across the floor and cabinets. He looks up to see Rumi, Mira, and Zoey standing in front of him, glowing blades in hand in a defensive stance.
"Hi! Welcome back!"
A clank pulls everyone's attention. Four pairs of eyes quickly lock onto the source.
Derpy looks up from the light device at the girls. One blue paw is slowly sliding off the teetering cylindrical device, very slowly, like the first scoop of ice cream melting off.
The chaos and energy of the room dissipate as quickly as they came. All the focus is now on the clutzy blue tiger.
While maintaining eye contact, Derpy places the same paw on the keeled-over device, pushing down on it, trying his damn best to upright the poor thing. His fuzzy paw, unable to get a proper grip, slides off it again. Another clank, the device screaming its pain from the mistreatment.
He tries again. Slower this time.
And again…
Everyone is still watching in silence, entranced.
Bobby snaps out of the trance on the fourth clang. He swiftly uprights the device and stands up. Derpy looks down at the now vertical light device, his face devoid of any emotion, only blinking thoughtlessly.
With stoic confidence like nothing even happened, he picks up some multi-colored flags from the counter next to him and waves them with vigor.
"Happy Pride!"
Flags wave, and lights strobe in the background. Bobby leaves the awkwardness behind like yesterday's news and carries on with brimming excitement. Things didn't go exactly to plan, but he is known for his adaptability.
Bobby, sporting the same wide Cheshire smile as his new friend, says, "So. Who wants cheesecake?"
