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It only takes one moment to know, Adam had always said to him. One split second to know that she's the one. The one you'll spend the rest of your days with, the one you want to fall asleep next to every night, the one who'll be holding your hand through it all. “That's bullcrap...” Blake had answered every time, “love is a work in progress. You're in a relationship, you grow together and over time you figure out if you wanna spend the rest of your life with that person. How do you wanna know if you can stand to spend 40,50,60 years with someone in just one little moment?” Adam had just looked at him like he was an idiot and told him that he doesn't have it down to a science, that love is what it is and that one day you just know. “That's how it was with Bee and I. We loved each other, we were happy together and then one day she was making coffee in the kitchen and I was sitting at the counter having breakfast and our eyes met across the room and I just knew. And then I proposed.”
“Like I said Adam.. bullcrap.”
His friend had scoffed at him then, raising his hands in defense.
“Fine, go on and be cranky but don't diminish my marriage just because yours is a disaster.”
It had stung, no lie, and later on the rockstar had called and apologized for being insensitive but for some reason this conversation almost felt like a wake up call to Blake. Months later when he and Miranda had started growing apart (not the occasional fights every couple is going through but actually, literally growing apart and not seeing each other for months), when he found out about her infidelity, when he was sitting on his couch in the dark, drinking a bottle of vodka by himself and thinking about what a failure he is, he would go back and visit this particular conversation with his best friend. And he couldn't help but think that maybe Adam did have a better idea about how love is supposed to work. The whole 'one moment and you know' theory still seemed a bit abstract to him, though.
Now that that the unimaginable happened, now that he's dating Gwen Stefani and has been incredibly happy for over a year, he never thought back to this conversation. There was just no need to, because of course there have been moments along the way. Moments of utter joy and happiness. Like their first kiss, slightly rushed and frantic on her patio couch while they were getting a little bit too drunk at her place. Or when she wholeheartedly agreed to going out (they couldn't actually go out since they were both celebrities in the middle of ugly divorces but dinner at his place with candle light and romantic music worked just as well) on a real date and looked at him with pure adoration and wonder. Or that time when Apollo mumbled a sleepy “love you, Blakey” while they were all cuddled up on the couch, watching a Disney movie together. There have been countless moments between them that made him feel like the luckiest guy on earth.
This night seems to be different, though. It feels momentous in itself.
He's mesmerized from the very beginning. With the way her lips move while she's talking, with her presence on stage- powerful and strong without being overbearing; with the way she's so effortlessly commanding everyone's attention. He's hanging on to her lips, hanging on to her every word like a starving man in the desert while she's talking about tragedies and faith, about music and finding herself again. Her body and her posture are screaming strength and power while her voice and her words are reflecting the vulnerable girl she really is. She's a beautiful paradox, always has been, and he'd been fascinated with Gwen Stefani from the day they met. Sometimes he can't believe that that was two years ago. That they somehow went from being colleagues to being friends, to being each others closest alley, to being where they are now: the happy couple everyone is talking about. He knew he loved her back then. As a friend, as a colleague, as an artist. Never in his wildest dreams did he think he would end up here.
Suddenly their eyes lock over the crowd and he swears he can feel the air rush out of his lungs. His heart skips a beat before it starts racing in his chest, the irregular thump thump echoing in his ears drowning out every other noise in the crowded room. It's as if time stops for a moment while they're in their own little world and then he suddenly becomes aware of everything. Of the way her beautiful dress is flowing down her body like she's some kind of magical Disney princess, of the way her eyes sparkle in a mixture of unshed tears and pure joy, of the little hitch in her voice when she thanks her parents and god, of the slight quiver of her lips when she's trying to hold it together in front of the crowd.
He knew this would be an emotional night for her. She'd been anxious all day. From the moment they stepped onto his private jet to fly back to LA she had been restless. In a positive way though, she was almost boiling over with excitement. And then the nerves had set in and suddenly his badass rockstar had turned into the little girl that's afraid to speak in front of the class. She'd started doubting herself and her abilities, started wondering if the committee accidentally picked her (as if that's even a possibility) as The Woman Of The Year 2016. She'd started writing a speech even though she rarely does and ended up throwing it in the trash because it just didn't sound right. It didn't sound like her. She went from excited to insecure to anxious to so grateful that she had to cry, in a matter of hours and he honestly hadn't expected anything less. This was a huge night for her after all. Especially after everything she's been through.
What he didn't expect though, was that he would get emotional too. Very emotional. In fact, it really took a lot for him to hold back the tears pricking in his eyes when they watched a clip of Gwen throughout the years. He felt never ending love when some of her baby pictures were shown, he felt a huge amount of respect watching some of her performances and he felt like his heart was being ripped into pieces when Gwen's sad face took over the screen, telling everyone who's willing to listen just how devastating the end of her marriage had been for her. And then she gets up on stage and he swears, he has never been prouder of anyone ever before. He watches her graciously accept the award, hears her joyful laugh when she realizes that this is real life, that everyone in the room is clapping for her and only her, and listens carefully to her speech. One that she hadn't written down, one that comes right from her heart.
And then he thinks about Adam, out of all the people, and their conversation. About 'that one moment.' And he gets lost in his thoughts for a little bit, because what if this is it? What if his friend had been right all along, what if..
“..to Blake Shelton for kissing me back to life, thank you so much!”
For a moment, everything stops. Then he feels his heart rate skyrocketing and goosebumps erupting all over his skin. She's looking at him with that sweet smile on her face that brings him to his knees every time and he sees the same tears that are clouding his vision, reflecting in her eyes. He knows he's probably as red as a tomato by now and he can basically feel every camera in the room focusing on him, but he just can't hide that lovesick, beaming smile that's grazing his features. And to be completely honest, he doesn't want to hide it either. Gwen Stefani just declared her love for him in front of the whole world and if that's not the greatest moment of his life, he doesn't know what is.
A soft, familiar voice is what eventually startles him out of his thoughts. “Breathe, Blake, breathe.”, Jen is whispering from his left while affectionately patting his knee. When he turns to look at her she's smirking in a way he can't quite place and playfully raises a perfectly shaped eyebrow at him.
“My gosh, you're so whipped, Cowboy.”
He exhales in a shaky laugh and it's then that he realizes he had, indeed, been holding his breath since Gwen spoke those magical words for everyone to hear. He brings his focus back to the stage where his girl is gesturing wildly in excitement and speaking her final words before walking off with James. Standing up and applauding her speech is like a reflex to him. And so is walking to the venue next door while casually talking to Jen and Todd. His mind and his thoughts are still focused on Gwen though.
He's completely taken aback by her sentiment and words, hadn't thought or expected her to thank him in any way. This was her night after all, and her award. She had fought her way out of her own personal hell, had been there for her children throughout it all, had been unapologetically honest with her fans and herself and managed to come back stronger than ever before. She deserves this award, deserves to have this night all to herself. And yet she doesn't fail to thank him. It's not until then that Blake realizes how much he'd been missing this kind of appreciation, this kind of affection in his last marriage. What struck him most though were not her words or how comfortable she seems to be with their relationship in public these days. It was the pure love shining in her beautiful brown eyes that took his breath away. Of course he'd seen that lovestruck expression on her face before, had caught her staring at him from the other side of the room with all the love she could muster, had seen her “heart eyes”, that people point out in basically every picture of them.
But this was different. This felt different.
This was the moment.
And goddamnit Adam had been right.
He walks straight up to the bar, leaving Jen and Todd to introduce themselves to the people sitting at their table and orders a shot. He needs a minute alone to organize his thoughts.
His head starts spinning when a load of memories and feelings of the last year or two crashes over him like a giant wave, but still he's pretty sure he's never had a clearer, more revealing moment in his life. It feels like a weight has been lifted off his shoulders; it feels like he's finally seeing the light after drowning in darkness for so long. He laughs then. A relieved, uninhibited laugh and people must think he's completely lost his mind but he doesn't give a crap. He finally knows what life is all about.
And then he hears the most beautiful sound.
“Ohmygosh cowboy, this is so crazy. Like this is literally the most draining night of my life but I'm sooo happy too!”
He doesn't even have the time to turn around before Gwen's arms are wrapped around him and she's snuggling into his back.
“Like can you believe it? They gave me the Woman of the year award! Me! How is this my life?”
He'd managed to successfully turn around without letting go of her by the time she's finished rambling and he can't help but let out a deep belly laugh at her antics. The bubbly, almost childlike excitement that seems to surround Gwen Stefani everywhere she goes, rubbing off on him immediately.
“Crazy isn't exactly the word I would use here, babe. More like 'well deserved' or 'long overdue'” he tells her with a sly smirk and she slaps his chest playfully before bringing her arms around his neck and shyly looking down at her feet.
“I'm serious Blake. This year has been so amazing and this is such an honor. I just feel so grateful.” Her voice breaks on the last word and Blake pulls her a little bit closer, allowing her to find comfort in his warmth.
“I'm serious, too, baby. If anyone deserves this award it's you. And I'm sure every single person in this room would agree with me.” He leans down to place a sweet kiss on her temple and then pulls away with a frown.
“Well actually, now that I think about it.. There was this one girl in the audience who seemed to be really pissed when she saw how hot you look, so she might not be too excited for ya, but other than her..”. He trails off with a teasing smirk that turns into a full blown grin when Gwen throws her head back in laughter.
“Jeez Gwen, it can't be that funny. Come over here and eat with us, you're acting like 12 year olds again.” Blake groans and affectionately shakes his head at his (hopefully) future sister-in-law. Leave it to Jen to break the mood. They grin at each other one more time before settling down at their table, politely introducing themselves to other party goers. When they're done making the rounds Gwen pulls him close again, raising a daring eyebrow at the sassy blonde sitting across from them.
“It's either laughing or making out, Jen. Your choice.”
The rest of the night is like a blur to them. They eat and drink, they catch up with some of Gwen's old friends (he never thought he'd ever meet Bono but it's moments like this, when one of the world's biggest stars is excitedly throwing his arms around his girlfriend, telling her how proud he is, that Blake realizes he is indeed dating THE Gwen Stefani), politely shake hands with tons of people who's names they probably won't remember at the end of the night, drink some more and when the craziness finally seems to wind down they eventually find their way to the dance floor.
He knows he's not the best dancer and she knows too, but there's nothing quite like holding Gwen close to his body while breathing her in and having her sweet smell wrap itself around his body. The fact that every other guy in the room (with the possible exception of Todd) seems to be utterly jealous of him, is a nice treat as well. They softly sway back and forth for a little while, simply enjoying the soothing music and being with each other, before Gwen titles her head up to meet his gaze. He smiles at her, anticipating her next move. Finally she leans up on her tippy toes (slow, agonizingly slow) using her arms around his neck as an anchor to pull herself closer and he knows she's waiting for him to lean in the rest of the way and let their lips meet but he just can't get enough of this moment, right here. Nothing is better than watching her when she's pressing her tiny body into his, or feeling the delicate scratch of her nails along the base of his neck, or seeing her look up at him with her molten chocolate gaze and slightly parted, deliciously beautiful lips. He leans in eventually, presses their lips together in a deep kiss, hoping that she can somehow feel his love and devotion he doesn't know how to express in any other way. When they pull away, they simply look into each others eyes for a few more moments. Bathe in the warmth and comfort of their love. After a while she breaks their gaze, leaves a delicate kiss on his jaw and goes back to resting her head in the crook of his neck, resuming their slow movements. They keep dancing for a long time, the quiet sound of beautiful jazz music pulling them into an almost trance.
His softly uttered words against her silky hair are what eventually breaks the peaceful silence between them.
“I've realized somethin' tonight.”
Gwen humms in response and tightens her hold around his neck to let him know that she's paying attention to what he's saying. But when a few moments pass and he still hasn't answered she stops their movements and slowly pulls away to look him in the eyes. He knows she's waiting for a clarification, an explanation, anything really, but he just can't force himself to say anything and destroy this wonderful moment of bliss he's experiencing. After another few minutes of silence, Gwen frowns at him- slightly unsure, visibly anxious about what he's gonna say next but the love and devotion in her eyes never fades. He leans in again, just because he can and because he really doesn't know how to resist her adorable pout and brushes their lips together in a feather light kiss. When he pulls back her eyes are still closed and her lips are curled up in that irresistible smile that brings him to his knees every time.
She's glowing. She's happy. He's the reason. And he realizes that her beautiful face is all he wants to see for the rest of his life.
With the soft stroke of his thumb against her cheek she comes back to reality and blushes under his intense gaze. She wonders if there'll ever be a moment when his piercing blue eyes on her won't make her breath hitch and her heart flutter.
“I've realized something tonight.” he starts again, his voice almost as tender and full of love as the look in his eyes. He chuckles nervously, taking one of her hands and gently kisses the back of it before carefully tangling their fingers together.
“This is it, Gwen. You and me and the boys. You're it for me. My future, my destiny, my purpose in life. Whatever you wanna call it- you're it. And I'll never let go.”
She takes a minute to process his words and when she does she places their entwined hands right over his heart, taking in the comforting rhythm of his heartbeat, and the adoration and love sparkling in his beautiful blue eyes. This is where she belongs.
Her answering smile lights up the whole room.
“This is it.”