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Chihen had long developed an innocent crush on Woongki ever since they'd first met at a charity gala when Chihen was only seventeen.
Woongki, then twenty-one, had been devastatingly beautiful in his tailored suit, with dark eyes seeming to see right through everyone.
They'd had a few brief interactions at various gatherings since then, but nothing substantial. Chihen was always too intimidated to approach him properly.
And he still is.
Chihen stood partially hidden behind a decorative screen in the hallway, heart thumping against his ribs as he watched the visitors in their living room.
Chihen knows exactly why they’re here.
Everyone in their social circles do.
The Cha family is hunting for a future spouse for their younger heir, Cha Woongki.
"We've introduced Woongki to so many eligible young people," Madam Cha said. "But none seem to capture his attention."
Jehoon nodded. "Woongki is... particular. He knows what he wants."
Chihen's older cousins, Mei and Xin, sat nearby, both dressed impeccably. They’re close to Woongki's age—early twenties—unlike Chihen, who at nineteen is still considered the baby of the family.
"Perhaps Woongki just needs more time," Chihen's mother suggested. "These things shouldn't be rushed."
"Time is something we have plenty of," Jaehoon replied with a polite smile. "But my brother is not getting any younger. We just want to see him settle down with someone suitable."
Chihen strained to hear more, curiosity overriding his natural nonchalance.
"Woongki has always been independent even as a child," Madam Cha continued. "We learned early on that forcing him into something he doesn't want is... counterproductive."
The conversations went on without Chihen noticing due to the fact that he's shamelessly staring at his crush.
Only when he looked up and found Woongki staring directly at him, their eyes locked for what felt like an eternity, that Chihen realized that his heart was hammering at the older man’s unreadable expression.
Chihen panicked.
He snapped back to his senses, suddenly shy and nervous.
He needed to escape and retreat to the safety of his room, but in his haste to turn away, he bumped into a nearby decorative table, sending a small vase wobbling.
"Chihen?" his mother called out. "Is that you?"
Chihen awkwardly straightened up, face burning with embarrassment as he stepped out from behind the screen and walked toward where everyone is sitting.
"Ah, Chihen," his father said. "Come meet our guests."
Chihen bowed slightly, unable to meet their eyes directly. "It's a pleasure to meet you."
"The pleasure is all ours," Madam Cha replied warmly. "Attorney Jian, you didn't tell us you have such beautiful son too," the Madan added, making Chihen blush silently at the flattery.
Then Chihen's gaze drifted to Woongki, who’s leaning against the couch, arms crossed, watching him intently.
"Good day, Madam. Jaehoon sunbaenim, and Woongki... hyung?" Chihen managed, voice barely above a whisper at the last honorific he used.
For a moment, he thought he imagined it, but it seemed like Woongki's lips curved into a slight smirk at his almost-stutter.
Except for that, though, nothing noteworthy happened that afternoon.
They all had dinner together and the visitors went home afterwards.
That night, he barely slept, lying awake until almost dawn, staring at his ceiling and replaying the way Woongki looked at him earlier with that mysterious smile playing on his lips.
The next morning at breakfast, Attorney Jian (Chihen's father, obviously) noticed his son yawning repeatedly.
"What is wrong, Chih?" he asked.
Chihen just nodded. "Couldn't sleep."
The Jian family is accustomed to Chihen being a man of few words, so they didn't press further.
In the weeks that followed, rumors began circulating in their social circles.
The Cha family seemed to be growing closer to the Jian family.
Speculation ran rampant that perhaps one of the young Jian ladies had caught Cha Woongki's attention (because it's impossible for Cha Jaehoon to be the one looking for someone to date since the young President of Cha Corporation is already happily married with three sons and one daughter).
Chihen's mood soured whenever this topic arose at home or among his friends.
Each mention of a potential match between Woongki and either Mei or Xin felt like a twist of the knife.
One afternoon, the two young ladies announced they would be visiting the Cha family estate for what they called "a random friendly visit." Mr. and Mrs. Jian would accompany them, and to everyone's surprise, Chihen insisted on coming along.
When asked why he wanted to tag along, Chihen said nothing, simply turning to go change his clothes. The family, knowing his reserved nature, didn't press further and brought him along as he wishes.
At the Cha family mansion, Jaehoon greeted them personally.
"Woongki is busy somewhere in the house," he explained when they inquired about the younger heir. "He grabbed some food earlier and said he didn't want to be disturbed today."
They didn't have a choice but to respect Woongki's wish, instead the ladies and Mr. and Mrs. Jian were led to the living room where they were served refreshments and some snacks while Jaehoon and his wife entertained them.
It was all boring talks, so Chihen eventually asked permission to look around the mansion.
To which Jaehoon readily agreed.
He wandered through hallways adorned with artworks worth more than his family's entire estate, and eventually finding his way to the back garden.
The garden was like something from a fairy tale, manicured to perfection with rare flowers in full bloom, stone pathways winding through carefully arranged greenery, and a small koi pond with water lilies floating peacefully on the surface.
And there, sitting on a stone bench with his eyes closed, is the very man that the family had intended to visit.
Chihen froze, mesmerized by how pretty Woongki looked. The afternoon sunlight filtered through the trees, casting dappled light across Woongki's features.
His sharp jawline, dark lashes resting against his cheeks, and his full lips that's slightly parted…
Chihen couldn't look away.
He stood there, hidden partially behind a flowering bush, simply staring until Woongki's eyes suddenly opened and fixed directly on him.
Panic surged through Chihen again. He turned to escape, but Woongki's voice stopped him cold.
"Jian Chihen."
Chihen froze, then slowly turned back.
"Oh! I'm... I'm sorry. It's rude of me to stare, hyung. I'll... I'll go now."
Before he could flee, Woongki laughed, a low, rich sound that sent shivers down Chihen's spine.
"Come here."
"Huh?"
"Come here and sit with me."
"It's okay... I'll—" Chihen started to protest, but Woongki raised a brow at him without repeating the command.
Chihen couldn't deny the unspoken order. He found himself walking over and sitting beside Woongki on the bench, but leaving a careful distance between them.
"You've been watching me, huh," Woongki stated (not asked).
Chihen's face burned. "I... I wasn't—"
"At the Jian estate," Woongki continued, ignoring his denial. "Behind the screen. And now here. Why?"
Chihen swallowed hard. "I... I was just curious."
"About what?"
"About... you."
Woongki turned slightly, dark eyes studying Chihen. "And what have you discovered?"
"That you're... intimidating," Chihen admitted honestly.
Woongki's lips curved into that smirk again. "Intimidating?"
"I… I mean interesting!" Chihen tried to reason out, feeling his heart race.
“Hmm? Which one is it really?"
"Both.”
Woongki laughed a little at Chihen's hysterics, but didn't push further.
They sat in silence for a moment, with the only sound the gentle rustle of leaves in the breeze until Woongki spoke first.
"I hear your family thinks I might marry one of your cousins," he said casually.
Chihen's stomach tightened. "People talk."
"Do you want me to?"
Chihen's head snapped up. "What?"
"Marry one of your cousins," Woongki clarified, eyes never leaving Chihen's. "Do you want me to?"
"That's… not for me to say," Chihen stammered.
"Indeed, it's not," Woongki agreed.
Chihen looked away, unable to hold that intense gaze.
Before Chihen could respond, they heard voices approaching, the rest of the family coming to find them.
Woongki stood up. "It was nice talking to you, Chihen."
"You too... hyung," Chihen managed to say, watching as Woongki walked away, leaving him confused and flustered on the bench.
That night, after returning home, Chihen couldn't stop thinking about their conversation.
In the following days, he began "coincidentally" bumping into Woongki at various places, like in a coffee shop, a bookstore, even once at the park where Chihen often went to clear his mind.
Each encounter left Chihen more confused and infatuated than the last.
Woongki would still engage him in conversations, words a careful mix of probing and casual, eyes always seeming to see more than Chihen is comfortable revealing.
Chihen's little innocent crush is growing into something more, something that consumed his thoughts and made his heart ache with a confusing mix of hope and despair.
The poor boy didn't know what to do.
The breaking point came during a family dinner a few weeks later when Chihen's uncle visited, and the conversation naturally turned to the ongoing speculation about the Cha family.
"Mei told me she and Woongki are getting along quite well," his uncle said cheerfully, helping himself to more rice. "There might be an announcement soon, if I'm reading between the lines," he added, then laughed a little too loud for Chihen's likeness.
The (not really jealous, I swear) boy’s fork clattered against his plate.
He’d only taken a single bite, but suddenly he has no appetite.
The food tasted like ash in his mouth.
"I've lost my appetite," he announced abruptly, pushing his chair back. "Excuse me."
He stood and walked out of the dining room, ignoring his family's calls of his name. He knew it was rude, but the words had struck him like a physical blow.
He locked himself in his room that night, and the entire next day, refusing to come out or speak to anyone.
When he finally emerged the following evening, he moved through the house like a ghost, completely nonverbal, eyes downcast, and ignoring all attempts at conversation.
His friends, Han and JL, concerned by his sudden withdrawal, finally managed to drag him out to a club a few nights later.
The pulsing music and flashing lights were overwhelming, but Chihen let himself be led to a table in the corner, hoping to simply disappear into the shadows.
But then he saw him.
Curse the fates for having such bad sense of humor against Chihen.
Woongki is across the room, leaning against the bar with two of his friends, Shuaibo and Jeongwoo. He looked effortlessly cool in a black silk shirt that’s unbuttoned just enough to be tantalizing.
Chihen (which is not really a surprise at this point) couldn't stop staring at the older man.
He watched as Woongki laughed at something his friend said, head tilted back and throat exposed.
Chihen's friends are talking, but he isn't listening. His attention is entirely captured by the man across the room, until he overheard a nearby conversation from a group of people gossiping loudly over the music.
"...that's why it never works out," a woman was saying. "Cha Woongki only ever dates women his age or men older than him, like Steven Kim, for example. Do you guys remember him?"
“I thought that was only a rumor?"
“Nope. They dated for months. Take my condo if any of you can prove me wrong."
The group laughed at the silly bet.
“It's his thing. Someone with experience, you know? Not these little boys who trail after him."
"Four years older, minimum," her friend added. "I heard his last ex was twenty-eight."
Four years older…
The words hit Chihen like a punch to the gut.
He’s four years younger than Woongki.
He isn't just not qualified, he is the exact opposite of what Woongki wanted.
The hope he'd been secretly nurturing curdled into something bitter and painful.
He signaled for the waiter and ordered shot after shot, drinking wilder than usual that alarmed even his friends.
The room began to spin as the music becomes a distorted throb in his ears. He felt dizzy and sick at the same time, and so he stumbled away from the table toward the restroom, ignoring his friends' concerned voices fading behind him.
He burst into the men's room, barely making it to a stall before vomiting every last ounce of whatever he'd put in his stomach that day.
After throwing his insides up (pun intended), he stumbled to the sink and splashed cold water on his face using his trembling hands. He gargled with mouthwash, trying to wash away the taste of alcohol and despair. And yet, he's still so dizzy that the room feels like it's tilting on its own axis.
When he looked up, his reflection is blurry in the mirror. But standing behind him, clear as day… is none other than Cha Woongki himself.
Chihen blinked, half sure and half convinced that the liquor did him really bad this time to the point that he’s hallucinating.
Meanwhile, Woongki’s just standing there, watching the drunken boy with an inscrutable expression.
"Chihen," Woongki's voice cut through the fog in his head. "Are you okay?" he asked.
That was the last thing Chihen remembered before the world went black.
He came back to his senses in a dimly lit room. The bed beneath him is incredibly soft, the sheets cool against his skin. And someone is on top of him.
Woongki.
Woongki is straddling him, with his weight serving as a delicious pressure against Chihen's own body… and he’s kissing him!
It isn't even a gentle, questioning kiss. It is rough, demanding, and possessive.
Woongki's lips are firm against his, tongue forcing its way into Chihen's mouth, claiming every inch of him. And Chihen is too stunned, too weak from the alcohol, to do anything but respond. He kissed back weakly, hands coming up to rest on Woongki's shoulders.
Woongki tastes like mint and that of whatever sweet cocktail he'd drank at the club.
He deepened the kiss, with one hand moving to tangle in Chihen's hair, gripping it firmly, and holding him in place.
Chihen could feel himself getting dizzy again, but this time... it had nothing to do with alcohol.