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“I should’ve jumped in to help you. Talk to you.”
Ragatha wrings her hands awkwardly. She’s sitting in the tent, close to Jax. Maybe dangerously close. Caine can snap her back to normal, but the glitches still hurt.
“I knew. I wasn’t as close as you two were, but Ribbit talked to me some after… What happened.” She pauses, laughs a little bitterly, sighs. “Gosh, it feels cathartic to be able to say her name out loud. But, the point is, she told me, towards the very end.”
“I don’t think she was trying to out you. She didn’t believe you were really… I mean… She bought some of the excuses you made. I tried to make myself buy them, too. Especially with how mean you’d gotten. How cruel your pranks were. I tried to believe that you’d been doing some kind of sick, long con bit by hanging out with Ribbit and then…”
Ragatha shakes her head. “It was just easier to believe your lie. I should’ve fought back. I shouldn’t have promised to never talk about Ribbit again. That wasn’t fair to her and it wasn’t good for you.”
Ragatha glances up at Jax’s abstracted form. Sharp edges and darkness. She’s sleeping. Peaceful. More peaceful than Ragatha’d seen her since her fight with Ribbit. Years. Why?
“I don’t know what else to say. I just… Wish I’d been braver, faster. That I’d stood up to you. That I’d decided to reach out to you the way Pomni did after you… Turned into this.”
Ragatha hides her face in her hands. “Would it have helped?” She bites her cheek to keep herself from crying. “I can’t decide what would be worse. Knowing I could’ve helped or knowing I couldn’t have done anything.”
“I’m sorry. I should have done better.”