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Lola had always believed that love was shown in the small things.
Whether it be a soft gaze held for minutes, a hand held out subconsciously, or a minor detail remembered without having to ask.
So when she found herself in the kitchen after school on Friday, flour dusting the counter, ingredients laid out before her, rays of sunlight spilling through the window, she couldn't help but smile.
Cookies.
She admitted that it was a simple gift, maybe even cliché. But a memory of words she had read in a Magazine a while ago jogged her mind.
The way to a man's heart is through his stomach.
And with the date planned tonight with her and her boyfriend, Ben, she figured it would be the perfect present for him.
Maybe, she could finally crack open the barrier between them.
At first she found it cute, how shy he was with small touches and kisses. But it's been over a year since they've started dating, and he still has almost never initiated anything with her.
But today was different.
As she walked alongside Ben once class ended, she noticed that he seemed like he was out of it. Not that it wasn't normal, his head has been in the clouds a lot recently, but she never expected him to ask her out to watch a new romance movie with him that night.
It had been a while since they've went out together. It felt like every time Lola seemed to finally become closer to making their love seem real, something comes to pull him even farther away from her.
But now wasn't the time for that.
Ben had asked her out, and she was ecstatic.
Now, she had to makes sure her cookies would be baked perfect for this night.
She looked at the small paper to her left, an old beloved recipe of the goods she would be baking was written in her mother's handwriting.
Lola didn't bake much, but she remembered making this exact recipe with her mother when she was a young girl. The bright warmth of her mother's guiding hands and the beams on her father's and brother's face when they saw the result was a memory she could never forget. Hopefully, she could see that in Ben when the gift was handed.
The cabinet creaked a bit when she opened it to grab two bowls to prepare.
She remembered how impatient she was as a child when she would help her mom bake. Always rushing so that the finished product would come sooner which led to a few mistakes in the process. Her mom would laugh softly and try her best to stop her, reminding her that for the best results patience would be needed.
"Good things take time."
Her voice echoed in Lola's head, she couldn't help but giggle the same way her mother did. Years ago, she innocently believed the advice was only for cookies.
Now she wondered if it meant something else.
She grabbed both bowls and placed them lightly on the cramped counter, preparing one to add some of the ingredients in.
She grabbed the stick of butter she softened beforehand and poured it in. Most of it fell off the tray, but it was obvious some were still clinging on to it. She grabbed a fork from one of the drawers below her to scrape off the excess.
After letting the fork and try a be free from the yellow mess, she grabbed a measuring cup that read 1 cup. The jar of brown sugar was lifted with one hand while the cup was held with the other. She carefully poured the sugar in, making sure she wouldn't add too much or too little. She didn't want repeat her past mistakes, grimacing at the memory of when she nearly emptied the entire jar trying to pour it.
She straightened the jar after perfectly filling the cup, adding it in the same place as the butter. The next ingredient that will fall victim was now eggs, two to be specific. After placing a small paper towel on the counter, she slightly cracked the egg against the napkin and opened it completely over the bowl.
Another egg followed and she disposed of the towel that held a small stain of egg whites. Now was the time for the last ingredient needed for this bowl, vanilla!
Lola had always found vanilla comforting in a way. Whether it be a candle scented with it, her mother baking with the same ingredients she was using, or the chocolates Ben gave her once.
Another measuring cup was taken from the group, it was very small compared to the other selected one. 1 ½ tsp was engraved on the small handle. She poured the brown liquid in the cup as warmth from the scent spread throughout her body. Now it splashed against the other ingredients as she added it in the bowl.
Now it was time to mix!
A spoon was grabbed from the same drawer as the fork, now used to stir the contents together. She watched as the ingredients were mixed together, blending into an entirely new thing. The sound of the spoon scraping alongside the walls of the bowl filled the kitchen, a sweet scent lingered in the room with it.
When she first baked cookies, she was too young to realize how enjoyable the process can be. But now she couldn't help but relax as she stirred continuously, younger her would be in shock at how current her found the result and process to be equally as fulfilling.
She averted her gaze to the dish beneath her, it was already finished mixing. Now, the second mixture needed to be made.
More dry ingredients were added in the other bowl, but she followed the similar movements when measuring and pouring. 2 ½ cups of all purpose flour, 1 tsp of baking soda, ½ tsp of salt, and arguably the best ingredient, 1 cup of milk chocolate chips.
To be completely honest, she was unsure whether Ben preferred chocolate chip cookies or plain ones. They barely talked about that kind of stuff, small preferences, random thoughts, things Lola thought couples would usually share.
Still, she added a few extra chocolate chips into the mixture.
Because if she didn't know much about Ben, she would take this as an opportunity to see if he liked it this way or not.
And who wouldn't love a bag of homemade chocolate chip cookies from their partner?
Her mother would've scolded her for using more ingredients.
She smiled at the thought as she leaned against the counter for awhile. Staring off into room.
The bright ray turned into a more soft orange hue. She turned her head to face the window so she could watch the sunset.
The city was much different from the countryside. And as much as she loved her life here, she couldn't help but prefer the sunsets in her old home. Some couldn't tell the difference between the two, but she knew just how much the scenery changed how it looked.
To see small light reflect on the tall grass and trees she would climb back then, to see the birds flying freely over crops, to see no buildings in the way of the warm sun in its final moments for the day, it was a sight she missed.
Not only that, but the colors were more vibrant than it was here. The sky painted a beautiful ombré of vibrant orange to the pale blue despite the colors differences. It put whatever dared to share a familiar color to shame, it made it impossible to look away from the sky.
But even so, the sunsets in the city were no ugly thing. She couldn't help but love the sight of both sunsets as much as she didn't openly express it.
Wait, sun sets? It was almost night time and she hadn't finished the cookies yet. She hadn't even put them in the oven yet, she needed to get to work.
After mixing the less wet dry ingredients together, it was time to combine both mixtures to create the dough!
She grabbed the bowl she first finished handling and slowly poured it in the other, making sure it wouldn't slip and drop to the counter or floor. She didn't want to clean any more that she had to.
The liquid mixture slightly became more stuff as it came in contact with the more dry ingredients. Now it was time to mix! Again.
Lola mixed the two together faster than before, but still properly, making sure the sweets would be warm and finished before the date.
After a minute or two, it was time to shape them and let them bake. She washed her hands thoroughly before touching the finished dough, she had to make sure these were perfect.
She shock her hands above the sink to dry them off, now was to place the dough on the tray. It had already been prepared beforehand, parchment paper laid on top of it.
Balls of dough were carefully formed as evenly as possible then placed on the paper. She tried to lay as many as she could in there to speed the process a bit. She started sounding like her younger self, old habits die hard.
She wasn't reckless enough to place them in a way they would touch once they baked though. She set the oven to 350° F and 12 minutes and sat in front of it, looking at the cookies through the glass.
Her face started to warm up a bit, but that didn't stop her from waiting here. Now that she wasn't preoccupied with baking and was alone with her thoughts, she couldn't help but grin in excitement for her date tonight.
The movie Ben wanted to see had good reviews, and she's heard her classmates talk about how sweet the main couple was on her way home from school. She was afraid that this relationship wouldn't last long, despite how much she wanted it to, despite how much she tried.
Just as she was losing hope in the idea of Ben ever liking her, he invited her out to watch the movie. Words couldn't describe how over cloud nine she was when she had received the invitation. Maybe things weren't so bad after all.
She was happy with Ben, she was happy spending time with him, she was happy to have him. She was truly excited for this date, it was all she could think about.
A sudden loud ding snapped her back to her senses. The sun had already set and the room became dark, the oven being the only source of light. The first batch of cookies were done! But before she would take them, she would have to turn on the lights.
She walked towards the light switch. On the way there she spotted the hanged a small drawing of her pet, Phoebe. Lola didn't know why it was there, but it was cute, not just the drawing but her beloved Phoebe. She wish she could play with her right now, but germs would get on the cookies, and that would be a disaster.
The lights flickered back on, letting the mess of the kitchen out of hiding. Even though the oven had been closed, she could smell the scent of the sweet treat she made. It honestly made her hungry, she wouldn't date to take one for herself though, but she would make sure to leave some for her family of course.
A mitten with a red and blue pattern slid on her hand, making sure she wouldn't get burned. She opened the oven slowly, the heat and scent of the cookies immediately rushed to her face, curling her mouth into a soft smile.
The sight of the cookies and their scent almost sent her right back to the past. Giving her father a cookies once he returned home and him gushing over how tasty it was. She couldn't wait for Ben's reaction.
But she let herself stay in the present, despite how much she adored the memory. There was still some more cookie dough in the bowl that needed some baking. She took each cookie and placed it in a small bag on the dinner table. Her mouth was slightly watering at the sight, she wouldn't admit it though.
The bag, now no longer empty sat next to a green ribbon and a pink sticky note with a small letter. She had to make the gift presentable obviously. And the ribbon was just so cute, she found it while wondering around the crafts store the other day. It reminded her of Ben's eyes, eyes so mesmerizing it was hard to tell the difference between it and a harsh emerald gem.
She placed more even balls on the tray, but a small amount of dough was still left. It was too big to make into one ball, and it wouldn't be the same size as the other cookies if she split it in half. Maybe she could give it to her brother, it's unusual just like him.
Her brain wondered what to do with the excess until an idea popped up on her mind. Maybe she should've done this with the other cookies, but this being the only one like it, it made it special. Perfect for her beloved.
The remaining dough in the bowl was scooped up by soft hands and shaped differently than the other cookies. After she was finished, she found that the center of the tray had extra space,so that's where she decided to lay it.
The batch of cookies laid in the oven, almost exactly like the previous batch. One noticeable change was how Lola watched it. It didn't seem possible, but her face was somehow even closer to the oven door. It was almost as if she was trying to phase through it and enter. And when the loud ding broke the silence, she swore she was about to actually phase through the oven.
She quickly pulled it out, ignoring how much she was sweating from the warmth. The tray had multiple normal chocolate chip cookies surrounding a heart shaped one. She was sure Ben would appreciate the effort and love put into these cookies.
Blue eyes watched in awe of the clear bag full of cookies wrapped with a cute ribbon and a note attached to the top. She was proud of how they turned out, this date night would be perfect! Speaking of the date, what time was it now? It was probably starting soon, Lola should get ready now.
Ring ring ring
The telephone sung out from the living room, catching her attention immediately. She rushed over to it, maybe it was Ben calling her.
"Lane's residence, Lola speaking" she spoke into the device, happiness leaking through her voice.
"Lola? I'm so sorry. I know we planned this, I know you were excited. I just… Ricky needs me right now."
Oh.
Oh.
Of course. Of course this would happen, what did I expect?
She wasn't mad, but it would be easier if she was.
The rest of Ben's voice didn't reach Lola, it all blurred into the background. Thoughts flooded her mind, making everything fade out like they never existed.
"Alright. I'll see you on Monday. "
"Lola look, I'm so sorry I swear this won't happen again."
"Alright, Ben."
She hung up the phone quickly. All of her excitement sucked out of her body as the cookies laid on the table, slowly growing colder.
Why had I gotten my hopes up? Why did I believe I would be his number one priority?
Lola curled up into a ball, leaning her back against the couch. Staying unmoved for minutes on end.
"Good things take time."
How much longer will I have to wait?