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Language:
English
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Published:
2026-06-30
Updated:
2026-06-30
Words:
2,415
Chapters:
1/?
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9
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84

something within

Summary:

Was it worse to live with the Zen'ins or without Mai?
Maki still wasn't sure, and it had been seven months since she had severed ties with her family and its company.

Notes:

So this is actually my first fic, so please take that as a forewarning (I'm new to writing). I plan for this fic to be anywhere from 75k-100k+ words; it all just depends on where the story takes me, and in the future I would also like to expand on other characters, but that’ll be for another fic (probably companion?).

Anyways, I want to clarify that this centers around Maki and Yuuta. There will be povs from other characters in the future, but they should be labeled to prevent confusion. Knowing myself, i will probably forget to label at some point, sorry in advance

I would also like to add that I try to keep things at least somewhat accurate, but I do not go to college (yet) and I also am not from Japan, so some things will certainly be incorrect and westernized. I do not claim that this is in any way an accurate representation of Japanese college, let alone college in general, so please don't come after me. I apologize in advance for mistakes and inaccuracies, so for the sake of the story, just go along with it :)

Oh, and then because Yuuta is one of the main characters in this story, I will touch on topics such as suicide, suicidal thoughts, suicidal ideation, etc. If you are sensitive to any of these topics, I would recommend reading a different fic.

Aside from that i have no notes, hope you enjoy!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: chapter 1

Chapter Text

Please read the notes above before reading the story, and the notes below after reading the story. 



Maki

 

The cool air blew around Maki as she walked across the rooftop, gently tugging her hair with its breeze. Reaching the edge, she grasped the railings and gazed into the inky skies. 

 

Years ago, on nights like this, they would climb to the rooftops and stare up at the same stars dotting the skies. Mai would tease Maki about the way her bangs would get messed up by the wind, and they would muffle their giggles so as not to wake their family. 

 

Maki startled back to attention at the sound of the door opening. She took her eyes off the skyline and turned, wondering who else would be up at this ungodly hour. Maki’s breath hitched as they neared. It was hard to make them out in the dim lighting, but they had the same choppy hair,  the same milky skin as..

 

It’s not Mai, Maki told herself, disappointed she even got her hopes up. When the figure finally became visible, she realized it was a boy. Definitely not Mai. 

 

The first thing Maki noticed about him was that his posture was, quite frankly, terrible. He seemed to shrink in on himself, as if trying to make himself smaller. Strange habit, she thought to herself. Most guys she knew did the opposite.


The boy had chosen the furthest spot away from her on the rooftop, so Maki didn’t even have the option of being subtle if she were to go inspect him. Maki tried to study him from afar, but she wasn’t able to make out much from where she was, no matter how hard she squinted. Curiosity urged her forward to where he stood. 

 

Upon realizing she was approaching him, the boy’s eyes widened to the size of dish plates. Has he never spoken to a girl before?

“Why are you here in the middle of the night?”
The boy cowered. The hell? She didn’t even say it that rudely.

“I.. I just needed some air,” he stammered out.

Geez, Maki thought. It’s not like I’m interrogating him.
“I can tell,” Maki mused.

“Yeah.” He sighed, peering down at the busy streets below them. 

 

What is wrong with him? Genuinely? Maki wondered. Sure, it wasn’t usually that hard to tell if someone was having a bad day, but this boy was the physical embodiment of a wet blanket. 

 

Her wet blanket metaphor was only further supported by the inherent melancholy that lay behind his dark lashes, which led to the second thing Maki noticed about the boy: his eyes. The dim city lights illuminated them, revealing a deep blue framed by eyebags dark enough to pass for bruises, making Maki think he needed sleep more than anything. 

 

A weak cough escaped from his mouth, interrupting her train of thought. Shit, I was staring right into him. “Sorry. I.. that was rude of me.” She looked down as she spat out the words.
“It’s alright.” 

 

A brief pause occurred, leaving Maki to drive the conversation again. She didn’t really know why she was talking to him, but something nagged at her to find out more about him.

“So what’s your name?” Maki inquired.

The boy’s head tilted like he was surprised she asked. At his reaction, Maki internally groaned.

“My name is Yuuta Okkotsu,” the boy answered, and glanced back at her. “And yours?” He asked, his voice slightly shaking.
“My name is Maki.”
“Just.. Maki?”
“I don’t go by my family name.” Maki snapped, shifting her eyes back onto him and watching him struggle for words.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

Maki interrupted him before he could go on. “It’s fine.” 

“No, I shouldn’t have asked about it. I’m really sorry; it was nice to meet you.” Avoiding eye contact, he turned on his heel and darted away before she could even respond.

He really couldn’t get out of here fast enough, could he? 

 

 

 *



The next day, Maki found her first class with ease. Nothing notable was happening, just basic introductions and expectations the professor had laid out for the year. However, her next class was what worried her. 

 

It was a multiple-year program in which she had to work closely with a small group of peers to complete some sort of thematic project. As if it couldn’t get worse, it was required by the university for all students to graduate, meaning there was no getting out of it. 

 

There were many things Maki didn’t like, but she had a particular hatred set aside for group projects. While it wasn’t any different from working on projects by herself, as she usually ended up shouldering the burden, it was the principle of it all that enraged her. Instead of learning about the actual subject, with each project, Maki had learned more about just how lazy people could be. It truly astounded her how shamelessly they just dumped all their work onto her to complete.

 

Shuddering, she imagined all the possibilities for the project. Best-case scenario, she had partners who did their part. Worst-case scenario, she was stuck in three years of hell. Please, please, please, let me have reasonable partners.  She didn’t care about building friendships with her partners; she just needed them to do their work. 




When her class finally came to an end, Maki sprang up and filed out as quickly as she could. The entire period, she had been planning what the best course of action regarding her class would be. She had decided that if she arrived as early as she could, she would be able to observe her classmates and get some idea of who they were. The main problem was that the plan was based on the assumption that she would be able to choose her partners. In the case that groups were decided by the professor, she was fucked.  

 

Fortunately, her next class was relatively close to her first, but that didn’t stop a wave of dread from washing over her. Each step she took brought her closer and closer to what she was sure would be her own personal hell. As Maki approached the building, its shadow cast itself upon her and her surroundings, darkening everything around her. She almost shivered from the sight of it, but stopped herself before she could react. It was just a building.

 

Cold air hit Maki as she entered, and followed her as she walked through the hallways. 

 

It didn’t take her long to find her class, and to her pleasure, she was the first person.

 

Literally. 

 

Maki saw no signs of life inside the room except for an empty Alani Nu can lying on a desk in the center of the room.

 

It was sparse to say the least - devoid of any decorations, only three tables, and the desk with the Alani. It seemed like an abandoned storage room that had been hastily prepared instead of a proper college class.

 

Frowning, Maki checked her phone to make sure she was in the right place. She was fifteen minutes early, and there was no teacher, or really anything in the class- surely she was in the wrong place.

 

Except she wasn’t. The numbers on the screen read the same as the room number. Odd.

 

Finally, the door creaked open to reveal a girl with electric blue hair and uneven bangs who shot Maki a nervous smile as she entered. Her expression shifted to confusion when she also seemed to notice the lack of chairs and a teacher. Right after came two boys who appeared to be snickering at something on their phones. The smaller of the two wore a scarf chunky enough to cover the lower half of his face despite the fact that it was April, and the larger one sported a tee with a graphic of a panda on it.

 

 Neither of them acknowledged Maki or the other girl as they came in, and after noticing that nothing seemed to be happening, slid down against the wall in the back and promptly plugged their phones into an outlet whilst continuing to laugh at each other.

 

 Really? Maki thought to herself. It’s only the first day of class, and they can’t even take it seriously? She really, really hoped she wouldn’t be forced to work with them. 

 

Ten minutes had ticked by, and still no sign of any teacher. The girl chewed her nails as she peered at her phone, while the boys continued to laugh. 

 

The door creaked open again, only to reveal a group of a few more students, and behind them-

 

Shit.

 

Mai entered the room, waving as she strolled over to the girl with the blue hair.

 

 Maki fixed her stare on Mai the entire time, but Mai wouldn’t even spare so much as a glance at her. Finally looking away, Maki rolled her eyes. If that’s what you want to do, then fine. 

 

Mai had always had a flair for the dramatics, especially as a child, but this was pushing it. When they were younger and inevitably found themselves in fights, Mai would typically express her frustration with petty glares or even the occasional prank if she could get away with it. But they had always made up one way or another.

 

This was different.

 

 It had now been seven months since the last time they had spoken, and every one of Maki’s attempts to reconcile had been ignored.

 

 For the first two months, Maki had waited, sure that Mai would come to her senses. Maki had assumed it was only a matter of time before Mai came back to her; she just needed to be patient.

 

The second month of silence had come and passed, still without any messages. 

 

By the third month, Maki had started to send texts.

 

Month four had Maki stooping to social media stalking, only to find that she had been blocked on all platforms, including their shared Spotify.


The fifth month marked their birthdays. Maki had sent an entire paragraph to her on their birthday, only to find the next morning she had been blocked on messages too. After that, Maki finally gave up.

 

Seeing Mai in person was weird after all this time. Sure, seven months might not be that long, but before that, Maki hadn’t even spent a day without her.

 

Now, it was as if they had never known each other. 

 

Huffing, Maki watched the next group of students walk in, and- finally!

 

A woman with dark, sleek hair and a scar crossing her face entered, clutching an iPad to her chest. Silently, she glared at the two boys using the sole outlet. 

 

She crossed the room to where they sat and waited for them to notice her standing over them. The boy with the scarf’s eyes widened as he peeked up from the screen, and the other boy jolted up, profusely apologizing. The woman’s eyes narrowed as she bent down and plucked their chargers out, replacing them with her own. 


Standing up, her eyes flew across the room, making eye contact with each of the students as she folded her arms.

 

“My name is Iori Utahime. I’ll be co-managing with the other teacher, meaning that some of you will be under my direct supervision for this class. When he decides to show up, he’ll explain more. Because he’s left us waiting on him, I will briefly explain the circumstances surrounding one of the students in this class. His name is Kokichi Muta, and he will be attending this class virtually for the time being. I expect you all to give him the same respect you would offer your other classmates, and that you treat him the same.”


Pausing, she pulled one of the tables closer to the outlets and propped the iPad against the wall. “He uses this iPad to call, but I would recommend obtaining his direct contact information for those who end up working with him. As long as he can call or text, there shouldn’t be any difficulty working with him. Any questions?” 

 

“Is it my turn to teach now?” A sly voice called from the doorway, and Utahime’s expression twisted into rage. 

 

A tall man burst through the doorway and plopped himself onto the desk with the Alani.
Maki wrinkled her nose. Not only did he look barely older than the rest of them, but he was also wearing sunglasses indoors.

 

 Seriously? That's a teacher? What a weirdo.

 

“I’m Satoru Gojo, the other teacher. I’ll take care of half of you guys, and she gets the rest. Sorry- not my rules.” He grinned. “Anyways, take all of your questions to Iori; she would love to answer them all.. Right?” He smirked at the other teacher, whose eyes bored into him like knives.


“So, for the groups.. Upperclassmen, same as last year. Oh! Yeah, another thing: you and your groups are gonna become suuuper close this year. You’ll see what I mean later in the year.” Laughing, he pulled a crumpled post-it note out of his pocket and peered at it. 

“So, without further ado.. Group one: Mai Zen’in, Miwa Kasumi, and Kokichi Muta.” 

 

Mai and the girl with the blue hair, Kasumi, grinned at each other, and Utahime came over, expression calm once more.

 

“And for group two.. Wait, one of you is missing. Huh.” Gojo frowned. 

“Anyways, Group two.. Maki Zen’in, Toge Inumaki, Panda, let me find your last partner; he’s late. The audacity.” Gojo scoffed and just walked out of the class.

 

Turning, Maki saw her partners staring at her. And of course, of course, they were the two boys on their phones. 

 

 The one with the Panda graphic- likely Panda (how is that a real name) smiled at her, while the one with the scarf gave her a small wave. 

 

Maki fought to keep a neutral expression on her face, but all she wanted was to hit something, or someone. 

 

Because, of course, Mai was in the same class, the teacher is an idiot, two of her partners couldn’t even focus for the first day, and the other one was even later than the teacher somehow.

The door clicked open again, and Maki’s nails dug into her palms as Gojo entered again.

 

“Aaand now for your last partner. Be nice to him- he’s like a son to me. In a way. ”

Smirking, Gojo stepped to the side to reveal-
 

You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.



“Yuuta Okkotsu!”

Notes:

Please let me know how i can improve my writing. Any and all*constructive* advice is appreciated, because I'm still really new to writing.

Also, big thank you to Isa for the title of this fic and also reading through everything I've typed out- some of it was really rough lol. I appreciate you so much, thank you for all the help !! And also thank you to everyone else who saw my TikTok and reached out- all of y'all are so sweet

To be honest, idk about the posting schedule yet, but i aim for like one chapter every two weeks or at least one a month (sorry) it could be more frequent, kinda just depends on whats going on in my life, but rn its summer so it shouldn't be too bad (at least rn, idk about when the school year hits)

For questions about the fic, js reach out to me through this link and dm me but please be normal :)
https://www.tiktok.com/@reallylostoverhere

anyways im rambling, hope you enjoyed the fic, thank you for reading, and hope you have a good day!!