Chapter Text
Instead of the usual occurrence of what's supposed to be the otherwise casual chitchat amongst the students within the campus, a swirling mix of voices overlapping one another, all of which sound indignant at best and scornful at worst, is all that can be heard from a couple of feet away behind the conifers and patio picnic tables.
Overriding the cacophony of the vocal besiegers were the defenseless cries of his fellow group members loudly imploring him to come for their rescue.
"ASH! ASH, PLEASE! HELP US! - AUGH!" Ryan Hopkin screamed out to his already unconcerned friend with all the strength he had, only to be silenced by a smoldered jagged rock faintly smelling of overbaked chocolate syrup and vegetable oil clobbering him right in the mouth, chipping an alarmingly big piece of tooth off and busting a lip open in the process. That throw was so violent and aggressive; it left such throbbing agony that it's too strong to even think properly, as a headache will soon be on its way to him. Getting daubed with soft and mushy handfuls of dirt brownies was one thing, but Kendrick Gilbert having already been knocked unconscious from barely so much as a single whack to the temple by a burnt pebble of fudge was another, so it can't possibly get any worse for Ryan, right? "Auughh, whoever did that must have quite the exceptional strength." thought Ryan. "Was it the intimidatingly tall dude? No, that guy's too fat, so the chances of him being brawny are pretty low. Not as low as his metabolism, I bet-"
Another life-threatening strike to the face, but with even more force than the previous one. "Ow! Okay- seriously, who's the one that keeps pitching these chunks of imitation charcoal with such an impressively high amount of power?! Clearly, none of the protesters have the muscle mass to be able to pull off something like this!" he yelled internally. He may not know who's responsible, not yet at least, but what Ryan does know is that it came from his left. "Okay, time is dangerously running out, so I must salvage tens of microseconds to manage to spot the catapulting culprit—"
...
Before he could manage to identify who it was in the nick of time, it was already too late.
"That, idea, BLOWS-"
"I thought people loved eating this sugary junk."
"Not MY fault I'm dealing with morons!"
"I think I'd rather jump into a wood chipper."
"If we're gonna make money, the obvious solution is to get actual jobs."
"We'll see who'll be making the REAL dough!"
"Your plan SUCKS."
"I'm not a rager! And even if I was, I still have every right to be mad at Ryan!"
"It's always hilarious seeing you guys fumble. You'd think the son of a renowned filmmaker would be a little more... Competent. But hey, guess it just doesn't run in the family."
Ringing. All he could hear for several seconds straight was ringing. It was loud enough to —funnily enough— cost the viewer his/her sense of hearing. Everything is all pitch black in sight until a hazy chunk of grey glowed for hardly half a second before fading back into the tenebrosity. The ringing was already beginning to steadily tone down when another glow of grey —now becoming whiter— pops up. Fades again. Then another one. This time, the brightness doesn't drown back into the deep dimness and spreads through, successfully pushing away every nook and cranny of the blackness with all its might until it is all nothing but pitch white.
His eyes have now cracked open.
Finally, the ringing had ceased. Now all that's left to do is wait for the blurriness to subside fully.
Well, that was quick. Everything is now crystal clear and sharp to the tee.
"Ughhh… Where am I…?" Ryan croaked quietly. His battered up mug may still feel the tingling and inflammation from all of the constant beating prior, but he definitely doesn't feel any other injuries far severe than that, such as a fracture here and there, so why exactly was he here?
He attempts to push himself up a tiny bit with both of his arms, only to be abruptly bogged down by a sucker-punch of a twinge of shooting pain firing up to his lower back. He manages to stifle a shriek before he made additional movement in his gurney, wincing really hard as he freezes inbetween his spasms. Thankfully, the slower and more gingerly he rested his back down on his bed, the more the burning had alleviated. Great, that about checks out. Not only was he completely marred in contusions of all (dis)colorations, including the yellow ones, because hey; at least his immune system's second line of defense isn't racist at all, that's for sure, but he somehow got splinters of wood stuck up to where not even the moon would shine. No, where Jupiter won't shine? Oh wait, that's clearly not a star. Sorry ladies and gents, not the best with planets here.
...
Hey, don't look at me, I'm no astronaut!
...
Oh, everybody is a critic..
"Hmph... So much for being self-employed." grumbled the Grumpy McGrumpypants Ryan, arms crossed comfortably and brows furrowed inwards with great chagrin. He thinks back to those very moments that had transpired before his eyes, until his attention was taken by something fairly noisy being made somewhere in the background. It wasn't entirely quiet when he had awoken from his cozy and cushioned gurnery, so surely it had to be the EKG monitor right next to him keeping his vitals in check, right?
Huh. Weird, no heart monitor in the room with him. There was this rhythmic pattern of beeps going about its usual way, just like in any other hospital. Even stranger, each beep being made were much longer than how a standard electrocardiogram should work in general. Honestly, he would be even more befuddled if the recovery room had lacked an IV drip stand hanging around at all. "What kind of hospital is this supposed to be for any patient in here to find relieving and peaceful?" thought Ryan, "No medicinal provision, no services, hell, speaking of services, no free slices of authentic New York-style pepperoni pizza with a side of French fries and a chilled glass of Sarsaparilla soda being served on a platter! Ridiculous!"... Jokes aside, he could really go for some pizza, fries and sarsaparilla for a refreshing treat after figuring out on how to fix the whole mess. He hasn't had that in a long time now. Boy, was Mister Fischer's Pizza Paradise Hut quite the halcyon of all pizza places in Turntail City. The food, the atmosphere, the-
"Alright, they're done." The beeping had now finished singing its song, with a sound of a door from what seems to be an electric appliance opening and closing, as well as some crinkling, meaning that there absolutely was no heart monitor operating actively. So his sense of hearing hasn't been playing tricks on him all this time. And that voice.. It wasn't familiar, it was unmistakeable. Ryan's eyes widened with a mix of awe and determination to find out who it really was behind this seafoam green colored privacy curtain obscuring each others' identities. Before he could take his sweet time on recognizing him based off of his voice alone, the curtain had already been drawn back without much warning. "Oh, hey Ryan." The now not-so-mysterious-anymore visitor greeted him with a wave. With ears sharply perking up to the ceiling's direction, pupils shrinking into pinpricks and daydreaming disrupted, Ryan nearly jumped out of his skin. He just couldn't believe it.
"Oh my god!.. A-Ash!?" he gasped aloud, shock being written all over his pre-bandaged face. Ash, now just taking a seat on a stool right beside his injured comrade, wearing his signature deadpan looking relaxed facial expression, nods in response, confirming that it was, indeed, the Ashton Trueman. "That's me." he says as he opens one of his freshly heated pizza pop packets and helps himself with a delectably piping hot piece of instant snack.
"What-! I-!..." he stammers, still riddled with surprise before he gathers his thoughts to convey what he really wants to tell him.
"First of all, was that the microwave posing as a nonexistant EKG machine!? And why is it on the floor?! Shouldn't it be on a nightstand or something!?"
"You were unworried about touching the soil with your bare hands without any regulations and consideration about the cretin costumers' health and safety, and now you're a clean freak all of a sudden!? Make up your mind, you dimwitted dickhead, which is it?!" Somebody shrilled at him from behind the curtain on the other side. He sounds more like he's angry with Ryan for some reason. Unless that must be..
"Trevor, is that you!?" Ryan cried out to his neighboring companion that he never knew he had all along. Trevor Carmichael, being his expectedly irascible self, continues to hollor. "Of course it's me, STUPID! Who else could you be possibly mistaking me for?!"
"Really? Why is it that I cannot see you, hm?" Ryan replied smugly, as he reaches his hand out to pull the curtain just to see how his bestest targetable friend was doing.
... Okay, that was totally not the worst life decision he's ever made whatsoever. Both of Trevor's eyes have been blackened so much that they began to swell to an unnatural degree. Ryan stared at Trevor, eyes much bigger and wider than dinner plates for a few seconds, before they squinted from his cheeks puffing up with air. He couldn't be bothered enough to hold himself from snorting.
"What's so funny?!" Trevor demanded, clearly even more irked by his lack of respondence. Ryan can hardly stifle his laughter, so he lets out a boisterous cackle. As per usual, Trevor is ticked off. So much so that the tip of his head (freshly wrapped in gauze) began to let a trail of steam to appear, anger flowing up like the toilet the crew (save for that one dork, of course) had once clogged at a Taco Bell restraurant for their slapstick film years ago. They congested the toilet with, get this, a pair of traditional wooden clogs! Made from the Netherlands! Ah, what good ol' days they were! "Doh- GO SHOVE A DRILL UP YOUR BUM, WHY DON'T YOU!?" Feeling absolutely embarrassed, the now erubescent Trevor lashes out once more, snatches the curtain from Ryan's grasp and closes it back, like a moody teenager slamming his bedroom door shut after being grounded for sneaking out of the house to do mischievious things with friends.
"He-.. H-His eyes look like a pair of purple giant clams!" Still in the midst of his gasping guffaws, Ryan manages to squeal it out, simultaneously pointing at the left and facing the right. God, those pulsating eyelids looked so painful, you'd probably have to wonder how Trevor's feeling to have such a misfortune happen to him like this. Matter of fact, unless if he's been informed about it by the caretakers here by the time he just got laid into the gurney, is he also aware how bad his injury looks to others? Can he even see properly, or has he been potentially blinded?
"Ha hah! You're right, they do look like clams being glued to his sockets!" Ash, which was quite unorthodox of him to do, lets out a chuckle along with his stormy-grey-furred rabbit pal, taking another bite of his pizza pop as he giggles through his nose. After what seemed like a period of many seconds later, Ryan quiets down a bit before finishing his laughing fit off with several ragged yet excited breathes, letting out a deep long sigh of relief as soon as his laughing ceases completely. He could feel his stomach hurt a little, but thankfully not in a discomforting way. Man, was that the best laugh he's ever had in his whole life! Hopefully, Trevor can look back at it and get a good laugh too, once he fully heals! With half-closed eyes shifting casually up to the fulgent ceiling for a bit, his eyebrows perked up a little as now something highly important had swiftly come to mind just many moments right before pointing out the inappropriate placement of a house appliance that clearly did not belong in hospitals in the first place, at least in Ryan's book.
"Oh yeah, there's something I've been meaning to ask you ever since you came here to visit us, Ash!" "Yeah, what's up?" "WHERE THE FLIP WERE YOU ALL THIS TIME!?" Snapping his head around to face his unabashed slacker of a group member, he lets out a bellow loud and angry enough to almost spook Ash. His nose and eye brows scrunch in tightly, forming into a full-on scowl. Ryan was not glad to see Ash, at all. Ash remained a bit in a flinching position, eyes widened, before then looking away from him and down to the floor, as if to show any sliver of guilt that he should feel. "Yeah, I'm aware, I did not save you guys before things escalated when I should have done so as both your associate and best friend-"
"YEAH- AWARE." Ryan harshly interjected, "You straight-up just abandoned us when we kept yelling out for you to help us! We were literally scared that we would die-"
"You were not gonna die-"
"I KNOW THAT, IT WAS JUST AN EXAGGERATION, DAMN YOU!" Ash reassured him nonchalantly, Ryan hisses back lividly. "Nobody is resilient when it comes to taking up so much damage, even if we try! In case of you couldn't tell already, we were shaken up by everything." he spat, "So please, do spare me some bullcrap while you can; why were you so slow?! What took you so long to respond!?"
"I didn't know that all of this was happening! I never knew you guys were actually getting your butts kicked to such an horrifying extent, I swear!" Ash exclaimed, wanting to be believed that what he did to him —or others— was anything but with the intent of hurting them. Sure, he was pretty slothful in terms of production with the filming and scripting stuff; lacking the initiative to contribute to anything without being asked to do, but never would he ever leave his friends hanging in a position where they aren't able to properly fend for themselves, especially in such detrimental situations.
"Well you SHOULD'VE known that this was happening, didn't you hear us screaming and yelping as we were getting repeatedly hit by your godforsaken "Fudgie Wudgie" brownies!? 'None the wiser' my butt! So what gives?!"
"Oh, so they weren't gonna eat any of them?"
"Tch! Of course they wouldn't, why would they!? I already told you 'no' the night after! Because again, how can you even digest these?"
Ash partakes his pizza pop for the third time. "Well, you know me, Ry. The strangest dude you'd ever have around in a friend group." Ryan's face goes from vexed to exceptionally cooled and collected for a second there, as well as the change in voice tone at the same time. "Yeah, no, you're right on that. You are indeed the kookiest buddy ever. And I love you for that, man." He continues with a small smile and sorrowful eyes. This touched Ash for a moment, as he returns the sentiment, "I love you too, pal. No homo, tho."
"No homo." Ryan repeats, as they both embraced a hug, making this moment all the more sweet — and most definitely not so gay at all, and I promise you folks that I'm not being casually homophobic when saying this!
..
"Okay- But seriously, let's not make everything too fruity around here!" Ryan, now resuming back to being mad, shoves Ash off of him as aggressively as can, causing Ash to fall on his back in his seat in the process, as if he was staining him without being careful. Wow, look who's being homophobic now. Heh, guess this just only makes me feel better about myself, doesn't it? "Let us not change subject about it, so you mind helping us pick up where we left off? How did you instead got me and the others to a hopsital?" Ryan added, arms once again crossed to show indignation.
"First off, wow dude, wasteful!" Ash said, popping from behind the bulky side rails of the gurney, bringing his pizza pop, now all squished up and sauce filling oozing ungracefully out of a bite. Ash did not really appreciate Ryan wasting good food thoughtlessly, and rightfully so. "Secondly, this isn't a hospital, it's an infirmary." he adds as he stands up, brushing and dusting himself off from his rather admittedly comical fall. "And thirdly, I may not have acted quick enough to save you guys, but I did do something to stop them from continuing to further assault you." Ryan's angry look didn't even soften to what he just said, it only puzzled him a bit. "Wait, what? Just what do you mean by that?"
"It was some distraught girl who approached me and brought my attention to you guys that made me decide to intervene and bring a stop to it all." Ash continues, as he then picks up the knocked-over stool and sits back up on his seat. This lessens Ryan fury a little more, the more he listens to him speak. "A girl? Distraught?"
"Yeah, and the funny about her is that she evens knows my name. Not only that, but she also seemed a tad bit familiar, yet I can't really recall from the tip of my tongue." Ash says, looking pensively.
"Ash! Ash, wait, stop right there!" A panting young woman in a simple magenta bouffant dress ran up to the previously preoccupied Ash Trueman, cycling out and about in his little cart, stopping him in his slow-paced tracks to get his attention right away. "Oh, hey lady. What's wrong?" He said to her. "Are you not seeing what's going on over there!?" she cried, pointing to where she wanted him to see what she's seeing. "Our friends are in great danger! We need to help them! Quick, think of something to distract them!"
"Familiar and knows your name? Then that must mean she knows you, just not so much as to a mutual extent, really. Speaking of which, what was her name?" Now with his expression fully softened, Ryan was just beginning to wish to know who that anonymous girl was. "It's like I said, I can't exactly put a finger on it, so I'm unable to tell you for sure.
"You mean to tell me that you didn't bother to ask for her name? Did you forget to bring your manners with you before heading off to class?" Ryan sounded pretty offended, though he isn't technically wrong for expressing that, and I don't think you can blame him for it. But at the same point and time, the girl can still speak for herself so that's just unnecessary. "She didn't tell me her name, whether or not I may've asked. In fact, I was far too engulfed with anger to even give her a chance to introduce herself."
An unimaginably violent hurl to the forehead, knocking Ryan unconcious as a result, had cracked his skull open, causing a thin but visible streak of blood to trickle down to his chin. That grisly sight was enough to set him off. This was the straw that broke the camel's back.
A high-pitched whistle is being blown as hissing steam exudes out from his ear canals. Slamming his foot into the pedal, revving up the wheels as the small patches of grass and earth fly up from behind at such an impressive degree, a big gust of wind whooshes away to the same direction he's powerfully bolting to, leaving a fresh trail of fire burning behind.
The students' heads and ears perk up sharply, some quickly whipping around and some slowly turning, looking to find the source of the heavy metal music growing from quiet to loud right before their instincts of fear sets in. "BOTH FOR MY HARD WORK AND FOR ATTACKING MY FRIENDS!" He was seeing red. Even a Spanish bull would be quick enough to deciding on running off to safety, away from him. "EVERYONE, RUN AND SCREAM FOR DEAR LIFE! HE'S GONNA GET US!" ejaculated the blonde-shaggy-haired guy. And so everybody did exactly what he said without hesitation; they all ran and screamed for dear life. They clearly do not wish to be claimed by his chaotic wrath. "WE CAN DANCE IF YA'LL WANT TO, I CAN LEAVE YOU ALL BEHIND!" Zooming and dashing sporadically from here to there to here, charging at any random prey he lands his sight on. "CAUSE YOUR FRIENDS DON'T DANCE AND IF THEY DON'T DANCE WELL THEY'RE NO FRIENDS OF MINE!"
"ISN'T IT 'WE CAN LEAVE YOUR FRIENDS BEHIND'?!" shrieked out the same man with a lime green button-up shirt between his heavy, fearful huffs, as he continues to sprint with all his might. "EXACTLY! 'CAUSE YOU'RE GOING DOWN, LIBERAL!" Ash snarls, voice now sounding not like Ash's at all and leading far deeper into that of a demon. "ALSO, WHERE IS THIS HEAVY METAL MUSIC COMING FROM?!" Horrified screams keeps on filling the limitless ether known as air, finding anywhere that can work as a perfect hiding spot, while the hell-spawn version of the insect-loving jackalope still goes on his relentless rampage.
Not wanting to have this take any longer than it should, everybody else resorted to retreat to their sanctuaries; those being the university's main building and the resident hall. "RUN, RUN, AS FAST AS YOU CAN, YOU TRY AND MESS WITH ME, I'LL HUNT YOU LIKE THE TALIBAN!"
"Wow." Ryan uttered, after having just finished listening. "Wait, Did the music come from the background?" "No, it actually came from my Bluetooth speaker." Ash answered. Ryan's eyes fluttered in befuddlement. "Oh, okay... Also, has any fire came out of your mouth all the while chasing them off?"
"Not unless if I've had some spicy cheesy noodles for breakfast, no." he replies. "Though, that would sound very cool if I were to be able to do this kind of thing."
"Yeah.. It sure would be, wouldn't it?" The injured bun trailed off, hand over chin, looking pensive and intrigued at the same time. He then lightened up as he adds, "It would be even cooler, if not, really really funny if you could scare off the Grave Walkers in one fell swoop!" Both Ryan and Ash chuckled together at the mere thought of nearly burning the Grave Walkers alive out of ever coming to the campus grounds to bother them again. "Well, I best be going now." Ash says as he gets up from his seat on the stool, and scoops up his now borderline busy-traffic roadkill of a triturated pizza pop off of the floor and delicately placing it inside a resealable plastic bag that he, for some reason, decided to him along with him on the go. "Wait, is that all you've got to share? Where are you off to now? You rarely make any plans for yourself." Ryan perks up, reaching out to Ash as if he were about to beg him to stay and keep him company for a little longer.
"Oh, I've got some important business to attend, alright." Ash replied in a bit of a professional tone like if he was ever an office worker himself, which is far, FAR unlikely for him to become, by the way... Golly, I sounded pretty mean for a moment there, should I feel bad?.. Nah, I'm not gonna regret it, thought.
"Huh, really? Well then, enlighten me, what sort of "business" is that you've now got going on, anyway, hm?" Ryan responds sarcastically, almost like he was being passive aggressive about it. "Funny how you think you can just rag on me for being lazy, yet you don't seem to be any better. All you do is sit there and stare at yourself in the handheld mirror while Trevor yells at Kendrick for having to retake the same line until it's perfect." Ash says, silently laughs at his lack of self-awareness as he proceeds to walk his way of the infirmary. "Wha!- Hey! No fair!" So, he was being a bit hypocritical. Ha. Loser. "Anyway, bye bitch!" Ash shouted out to him with a smile.