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“Please text!” Ilya called over his shoulder and he followed Shane down the steps to Shane’s car.
“We’ll text!” David called back. In his defense, he had tried to earlier.
All things considered, they’d just had a very nice visit with Shane’s parents. Impromptu, yes. Unexpected, fuck yes. Ilya opened his door, let himself in and sank into his seat, feeling more relief than he had in a very, very long time. Shane’s parents knew now. That was a major hurdle. It wasn’t exactly ideal in how it happened, but it happened and everything was ok? It sure felt ok. Nobody was crying anymore. Nobody was mad. Nobody was disappointed.
Shane got in the driver’s seat next to him. He hadn’t said anything yet, but Ilya noticed he looked considerably lighter. Like half the weight of the world had lifted off his shoulders. Like he could breathe a little easier now.
“Bye! I love you too!” Shane called, waving to his parents out the windshield. The sun was shining on him through the window, washing his face in sunlight. He looked so beautiful in the warm glow of the setting sun. It was not lost on Ilya that the sun was shining on him again after it seemed like a dark cloud had been hanging over his head all these years.
Shane backed down the driveway and into the street. He cut the wheel at the end and put the car in drive. He let out a massive, shaky exhale. Ilya took his hand in his and just held it while he drove and waited for him to speak.
“That went better than I thought it would?” Shane said, still not believing that all of that happened that afternoon. It was certainly not on his made-up-in-his-head-Cottage Itinerary for the day. Or even that year. They had a plan. The plan also certainly did not include his dad finding Ilya pressing him up against one of the massive glass windows at his cottage in practically zero clothes.
Ilya lolled his head to the side to look at him and smile. He squeezed his hand twice, picked it up and kissed the back of it. He was so glad he had his sunglasses on. Shane didn’t need to see the tears of happiness, joy, relief that were threatening to spill over.
He nodded, “Yes, I think once your mom got over the shock of seeing me in her living room, the rest was ok.”
Shane huffed out a laugh. “Yeah, I’m kind of surprised my dad didn’t say anything though. She was really surprised to see you, I think. I would have thought my dad would have said something.”
____________
Yuna waved until she couldn’t see Shane’s car anymore. She turned and walked back up the stairs, brushing past David without a word. He watched her walk up to the steps to the house without another look his way or a word to him. They’ve been married long enough for him to recognize what this means.
She’s pissed.
He trailed her up the steps, hanging back a step or two the rest of the way up the walk. She opened the front door and stepped through, leaving it open for David. He crossed the threshold and held his breath, waiting for her to speak.
Very quietly, she finally spoke, “How could you let me be blindsided like that? You knew and you didn’t say a word.”
“Oh, because I wasn’t?” he jabbed back.
“Yuna, I walked into the kitchen at Shane’s after he didn’t answer a phone call or a text all day and found him plastered up against the window by Ilya Rozanov in their bathing suits.”
Yuna’s jaw dropped, “You WHAT?” she said, aghast. Nobody had bothered to fill her in on the details of just how exactly her son had ended up with his supposed rival to announce he was gay and this is his person in her living room that afternoon.
“Yeah. His car was in the driveway, so I went to the door and knocked. Nobody answered but the door was unlocked. I called his name so loud and so many times and he didn’t answer, so I just decided to grab my charger quick. I turn around from the counter and I see him and Ilya walking up the stairs. I literally could not believe what I was seeing and then Ilya just pushed him up against the windows.” he recounted for her, “Ilya was actually the one who noticed I was there and pulled back quick.”
Yuna put her head in hands. “Shane must have wanted to literally die,” she said, quietly. She couldn’t imagine the absolute shock that everyone involved must have experienced. The closest thing she could equate it to was probably pretty close to the shock she felt seeing Ilya Rozanov in a Boston Raiders shirt walk up her front steps just a few hours ago.
“I wanted to literally die!” he said with a little laugh. “I just stood there frozen for a second, not knowing what else to do! I just decided to leave and hope that neither one of them actually saw me. I was ready to take it to my grave if I had to.”
Yuna popped her head up from her hands, “You would have really never told me?” she said incrediously, “Seriously?”
David tipped his head to the side and softened his face with a small smile, “Seriously,” he said, “It was not my news to tell.”
_________
Shane threw his keys into the bowl by the front door and toed his shoes off. He went straight to the couch and laid down with his arm over his eyes. He was physically, emotionally, and spiritually exhausted. Ilya hoisted his legs up, sat down and put Shane’s legs over his lap. He looked at his now boyfriend, another happy accident, if you will, of the day, and smiled at him.
“Shane.” he said softly.
Shane uncovered his eyes and looked at him.
“I still can’t believe all that happened today.”
“Me either,” Ilya agreed, “But it was good, yes?”
Shane sighed, “It wasn’t exactly ideal but yes, it was as good as it could have been, I think. I wish my mom wouldn’t have cried. That was kind of hard,” he admitted.
“She was just emotional, it was a lot today,” Ilya reasoned, “When did she cry?”
“When she got up and went outside. She was a little teary when I went out there to talk to her. And then I cried,” he said, “but it felt good to get it all out, you know?”
Ilya nodded, “What did you say to her?”
Shane sucked in a deep breath, “I told her I was sorry. I tried really hard to not be like this. To not be gay but I just couldn’t help it.”
Ilya frowned a little, looking more sad than mad or upset.
“And then she told me I had nothing to be sorry about,” Shane continued, “and that she was sorry for making me feel like I couldn’t tell her about me. About us. And that was such a huge relief for me, you know? Not because she apologized but because she acknowledged how fucking hard all of this has been.”
Ilya nodded. All of it had been hard. 10 years of hiding. Not being able to tell anyone anything about their relationship. It took an emotional and mental toll every single day.
“Did my dad say anything while we were outside?” Shane asked.
Ilya nodded, “He did. He apologized for walking in on us. And of course, I said it was ok. He did not do it on purpose,” Ilya said.
“I feel a little bad he found out like that. I’m just glad he wasn’t a few minutes later,” Shane said with a small laugh.
Ilya’s expression turned a little wistful. He thought about what he was planning to do to Shane while those hot dogs thawed. David walking in on that? None of them would have ever recovered.
“He asked if you were okay too,” Ilya said.
Shane swallowed, “What did you tell him?” he asked.
“I said I didn’t know, but I think yes, now he is better. I did tell him that you said that this was like a nightmare, and he was very sad about that. He said that he did not want you to feel bad for any of this because you didn’t do anything that you needed to feel bad about,” Ilya replied.
Shane knew his dad would be so good about all of this without needing all of the context. He has always been the more laid back parent. He was the one Shane went to when he was a teenager and he needed to tell Yuna something that he knew she was going to not handle well. He would go to his dad, tell him first and David would filter out the extra and tell Yuna what she actually needed to know. It was a system that worked well for everyone. David was kept in the loop about what was going on with Shane, Yuna didn’t need to stress about every little detail because she didn’t know every little detail and it kept Shane out of a lot of what he thought was unnecessary trouble.
“He also said he was sorry for asking if there were any nice men in Montreal,” Ilya added with a small smile.
Shane laughed out loud, “Good! Because what the fuck was that about? I cannot believe he said that while you were sitting right there!”
“I just said that he didn’t want a nice man, he wanted me,” Ilya replied, jokingly. Shane’s face turned completely white and the strangled sound that escaped his mouth suggested he was on the brink of a full on Shane Hollander meltdown for the second time that day.
“Relax, Hollander. I did not really say that,” he said. It was so easy to get him worked up.
____________
“I still cannot believe Ilya Rozanov was in my living room today,” Yuna mused, still not believing anything that happened that day.
“Pretty wild day, eh?” David said. He had a glass of wine in each hand and handed her one. He sat down and patted the couch next to him, inviting her to sit next to him. She took the glass from him and sunk down into the couch with a heavy sigh, putting her feet on the coffee table.
“Yeah,” she agreed, “But still. Ilya Rozanov??” she said, with what David detected as a hint of disgust in her voice.
“Yuna,” he cautioned, “Don’t. They’ve been seeing each other since their rookie season. You being upset by this isn’t going to make them change their minds.”
“I know, but…” she trailed off.
“He loves Shane, Yuna.”
She sat up, leaned forward and turned slightly to face him, “Did he tell you that?”
David shook his head, “No. He didn’t say that he loved him, but I could hear it in the way he talked about Shane today,” he explained, “Shane had a pretty bad panic attack after I found them. He told Ilya that this was like a nightmare for him.”
Yuna let out a small gasp and tears pricked her eyes, “He didn’t tell me that part, but he did apologize for not telling me sooner and for not…being straight, I guess. How sad is that? I feel awful that he’s been holding onto this for so long, because he thought he couldn’t tell me.” she said sadly. She hated that he felt like he needed to be sorry for being who he always has been and for not living up to the image she had crafted for him.
“Ilya told him that if this feels like a nightmare, then it is time to wake up and when Shane told him he was too scared of what was going to happen, Ilya told him that yes it might be scary, but he’s brave and he can do it,” David shared, “Shane was going to come here alone, but Ilya wanted to be here too. To support him.”
That opened Yuna’s flood gates. She started sobbing. Every emotion–sad, relieved, surprised, pissed off, disbelief–came pouring out of her eyes. Sad for seeming so emotionally unavailable that her son felt like he couldn’t tell her about who he really was. Relieved for Shane and Ilya that everything was out on the table now. No more secrets, no more sneaking around, around them at least. Pissed off that her husband let her be surprised by Ilya walking into her house today. She was letting that one go though, he had a good reason for not telling her, one that she respected after hearing his reasoning. Disbelief over all of it–Shane coming out to them, Ilya being not just a rival but his partner of almost a decade and they had no clue, Shane lying to them about being on a silent retreat this week because he felt like he couldn’t tell her his real plans.
She wiped the tears from her face furiously, “That is the sweetest thing. Ilya Rozanov said that?” she asked.
David chuckled, “He sure did,” he said. He wiped a tear from Yuna’s face that she missed, “They’re in love. For real,” he said, looking her straight in her eyes, making sure she actually heard him, “and he’s happy. They’re happy. I don’t think we can ask for much more.”
She nodded, accepting for the first time that night that Ilya Rozanov was more than likely going to be her son in law. And she was okay with that.