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Every few seconds Dani cleans her cheeks off her tears. She is containing herself to not cry, to not feel, to not make this difficult. But it has his own agenda and she can't contain it as much as she wants to. Because she really should stop crying right now. There is nothing she can do. Stella is away, she did not say her feelings for the older woman and why the fuck is she crying right now? She is not a young teenager anymore crying over a crush. She uses her best detective skills to figure out what is happening in the turmoil that is her mind. She should just have kissed the girl. How infantile is she right now quoting The Little Mermaid. She is so confused and tired of this bullshit.
"There is nothing I can do by loving you." She feels powerful by saying it out loud. She should already put the truth out and deal with it. Is not going to happen. Is not like she is gonna have a family with her.
"Oh my god!? I passed through the kissing and am thinking about kids already?" Screamed Dani to the darkness of her room. "Can you just not, Danielle?"
As she thinks about the blond curls and the boldness of the woman, Stella is in her flight in the way for a very far place from Dani's. Even if she was in the other room, the redhead would still think is far away since she can't say her feelings because she very much knows the reactions she will get from the person she is falling in love with.
"The thing is, just grow yourself some balls and get over her." But she can't stop herself from thinking how bad Stella would think of her phrase and she burst into laughter. "Oops".
"Ma'm I came to the conclusion I am head over heels for you". That made her laugh harder. "Nope. Not happening". She may be making jokes to easy her pain but she notices how problematic this is. She just signed to make a test for detective and she has to focus on it.
"I wanted her to say 'Yes Dani, I know how you feel about me'. Just that". She only now realised she was talking with herself while she was laid in bed in her dark room and was getting late for her night shift. "I'm so fucked."
What would even be the meaning on Stella saying "I know, Dani"? The damn woman doesn't even want the same of her! Also she is her boss, that is clearly against some rule. "I should just..." But she decides is enough of crazy self talking. She has lives to take care of and hers has to be solved later. She put on her boots, cleans her face off her tears and prays she won't cry in the car once again.