Chapter Text
Keith:
A normal day in the life of an extremely cool and almighty agent named Keith, That’s me! I usually work with Alice, my extremely serious co-worker. and Felix, my best buddy! We treat eachother like siblings since we’ve been friends(besties) for years and share the same dorm thingy. Felix has the lowest salary here. Just in our trio, it’s been a running joke since I was 10! But it’s not THAT low. Don’t ask where he got the money from. I don’t know either.
I honestly really like the butterfly knife Alice gave me for our friendship anniversary a few days ago! I never thought she’d give me one, cuz that’s her favorite melee weapon(and she knows that I don’t know how to use a knife, so I think she’s just mocking me here). I noticed that Felix keeps getting solo missions all the time. no idea why. but we never really bothered to ask him about it. it usually takes him about a day to finish one. In VERY rare cases do all three of us get a mission together, if we do. It’s probably about helping Admins catch a hacker or exploiter. Well, the Admins do try to get us out of there because they thought we were civilians thinking they can fight a hacker, but nah. We were not going let them stop us from getting our well-deserved pay.
Sometimes, they try catching us because we interfered with their work. But we manage to get away before they even breathe in our direction.
And also, Me and Alice almost ALWAYS get missions with eachother. maybe because we are obviously really compatible and definitely don’t argue the entire time about who has the better fighting style and weapon choice. Oh no! dead bodies lying everywhere with blood permanently staining the carpets and walls? Run! Alice runs rlly fast. i can’t keep up with her. And of course, there’s that one time i almost got shot in the leg by cultists! so usually when we run away Alice GRACEFULLY slings me on her shoulder and runs while carrying me.
And, if you don’t know already. Felix can literally be mauled alive by a bear, cut by chainsaws and still survive or escape. Like I was so shocked when he came back from a mission one day, holding a teleportation device in one hand and the other on his bleeding head, “Keith.. cough cough made it out alive didn’t I? I’m gonna brag to everyone about this for the rest of my life! Heh.” Smiling brighter than the sun. WHEN HE BEING ALIVE IS LITERALLY A MIRACLE AT THIS POINT- “FELIX, GO FIND ALISHA. NOW.” I exclaimed immediately “Pftt- this is just child’s play, I can handle it-..
THUD
He collapsed onto the floor. I, frozen. Just tapped my comm device in the rhythm that makes it call Alisha without taking my eyes off Felix and told her, “Grass. Felix is bleeding and collapsed in the ####ing doorway of 005”
Oh yeah, forgot to mention. part of his arm’s skin was ripped off. I have no idea how he got injured instead of banned or died from blood loss. But right now i am going to TELL ALICE HE DECIDED TO RISK HIS LIFE AGAINN!
And update, he had to get over a hundred stitches. I didn’t know how he wasn’t mashed potatoes, but that’s just how it is I guess. Better alive than dead.
He did also mention something about offending an entire cult one time. There’s a bunch of cults out there. I’m not sure which one, but I do hope he didn’t OFFEND THE WRONG ONE! Like gosh there was a cultist that thought I was a suitable sacrifice and almost killed me like three years ago.
Anywaysss
Alice is quick, great at predicting and planning. She uses a butterfly knife because it is in her words: lightweight, easy to unsheathe and store. Even though the range is small, she can counteract it with her speed. Before you know it, you have 30 cuts on you! If we get lost, she can retrace our steps accurately and get back to a familiar area in minutes. I am NOT exaggerating. She is basically one of those maps in video games where when you progress, it shows up on the map. She’s practically a human map.
Other than that, she’s a really good painter! I caught her painting once a few years ago and it looked soo good. Unfortunately she got a lot of criticism and hate from her family, friends.. that really sucks. The most i could do is have near-perfect aim and a great sense of humor :/
Our work outfits are more casual and on the practical side instead of full-on secret agent suit mode. Boss DIRECTLY told us to keep it casual and not too technology-like to prevent people from suspecting. The Admins have a chance of doing more paperwork AND more work after the news of us spreads world-wide. Which WILL happen. But just hope that we can stay anonymous, attention is very not our thing.
Also, the doorway of our base looks kinda like a normal doorway. You go in, and theres one deeper in, looks normal but it’s actually one that can like descend underground to ehh let us in. Usually it’s Elijah that opens the door but sometimes he isn’t here and everyone else is probably lazy so we just say a really long password at it. I’m gatekeeping the password from you guys, no telling!
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Bacon soldiers were everywhere. Kidnapping bacons and forcing them to work for the terrorist organization they are. They were incredibly rude and.. racist. I’m not sure why. But they judged guests by the color of their hair. Like, is that even necessary? Color? Really? It’s just hair, you can’t really make a whole terrorist organization because of racism. But well, my kind did.
Me and Alice were casually walking around, checking out the stores in town and seeing if there was anything we liked. There were clothes shops, housing equipment, convenience stores etc.
I wore a simple light blue T-shirt and soft gray pants, with some cool black and lightning blue shoes to contrast. My hair was in a “I don’t give a damn” way. I just couldn’t find the need to brush it.
Alice tied her hair up in a messy bun, a white lily flower put on the right of her hair, she had a soft white T-shirt that had red floral patterns scattered around and sky blue jeans that were slightly ripped and one size too big. She wore white shoes stained with colorful paint that had a black shoelace that was tied into a star-shape that can TRANSFORM roller skates at the bottom! She also had thin black glasses. She has nice taste in fashion!
Of course, we didn’t buy anything. Alice’s parents didn’t let her have any money and I lived at the orphanage just a few streets away, the woman who runs it doesn’t really let us buy anything that isn’t useful. Well she’s right, I would’ve bought over a million chocolate bars if she gave me an allowance.
Why are we out here by ourselves without a trusted adult watching us? Well because Alice’s parents were out of town, the woman at the orphanage trusted Alice to take care of me. She had to take care of the other kids in there, so you can’t really argue that she’s a bad person. She’s just trying to make sure that everyone is safe and sound. Yes, my parents either abandoned me in a ditch or died. I’m not sure. But my life right now is the BESTT!!
We didn’t mind the people who stared and pointed, gossiped and laughed. We stopped in front of an accessory store, the items peaking our interest immediately. Alice and I started chatting about how striking and amount of passion put into it. The design was radiant. I could stare at it for hours studying the intricate details. But suddenly, people down the street started to scream. I was confused and frightened. I froze in place and slowly locked eyes with Alice, even without words, the message was sent clear, “Did you hear that?”
Sounds like gunshots pierced the air, people were running, ‘water’ was splashing.
Alice on the other hand had better survival instincts than I did and grabbed my wrist tightly right when the first gunshot sounded. She ran with me into a dark alleyway and hid behind a dumpster. It smelled awful. But Alice covered my mouth, either to keep me quiet or to dull the stench. She slid her arm behind my back and held me closer. “Did something bad happen?” I quietly but curiously asked through the hand covering my mouth. “Shh.!!” She quickly shushed. I noticed the amount of pure fear in her eyes and immediately shut myself up.
Gunshots, screams, more screams. Bodies falling onto the ground. People yelling orders. It was like a real life horror movie but there’s probably a few hundred people being the killer instead. I covered my ears, trying to drown out the noise. Alice clutched me harder, as if trying to make sure that she’s not in a dream and I’m alive. I heard loud and heavy footsteps running past the alleyway. And one walked right into it. I was gripping onto Alice so tight that it probably hurt. Before they found us though, the supposed ‘leader’ yelled for them to come back. We heard fast footsteps running back out. We both internally let out a sigh of relief.
We hid there for who knows how long. The comfort of the other’s presence was the only thing keeping me from breaking down into tears right then and there. Who knows what could’ve happened out there. None of us could bring ourselves to get up and see what’s going on.
But then. A new pair of footsteps broke the silence. They were cautious but quick; as if trying not to scare anyone but still trying to get away from the chaos outside. They grew louder and louder. Tears rolled from my eyes and silently dripped down. Her hands softly patted my back in a comforting matter. And then a guy no older than 16 came into view. He had bright, colorful dyed hair, an earpiece on the right side of his head that had a mic attached and a green leaf symbol on it, he wore muted green and white shoes, a white shirt with a big red text that had “WAR” printed on it, the text looked like dripping paint and fire at the same time somehow. Camo shorts that reach just above his knee. He noticed us and crouched down to our level. Alice, alarmed, started to try scooting away from him. “Hey, kiddos. There’s no need to be scared. I don’t bite.” He smiled softly. The person held his hand out, like awaiting for a handshake and quietly whispered to us, “Nice to meet you, my name’s Elijah. Leader of a vigilante group that beats up bad guys.” It wasn’t one of the guys killing people, thank God. Gunshots and screams continued to echo throughout the alley, wet sounds of blood splattering and bodies being thrown were still heard in the background.
We stared at him for a moment. Unsure if he had good intentions or not, But then gunshots fired and ‘hit’ Elijah. A weird green shield thing became visible and blocked the attack before shattered into hundreds of tiny shards and disappearing. He ducked behind the trash bin with us/
“Well, that was not in my plan.” He sighed in slight annoyance “Can you trust me for a while and let me help you come out of this alive?” He raised his hand again and nudged it slightly closer, looking abnormally calm despite the fact he almost died.
Alice didn’t hesitate and took his hand, “grab on tight!” Alice’s hold on me became tighter as even more gunshots fired. “WHO’S THERE!? SHOW YOURSELF!” A man with a deep gravelly voice yelled. Alice glared at Elijah and said, “I’m only doing this for him.” Subtly gestures to me “Don’t you think you’ve gained my trust yet, you dimwit.” Elijah quickly took out a weird metal device thing and clicked it as more gunshots fired and someone was running this way. All three of us were teleported to somewhere. My eyes were blinded by the harsh green light that followed in the teleportation. But it was so COOL!!
We appeared somewhere, infront of a black door as dark as the night sky. It was pretty wide, much fitting for garage door. With green LED lights scattered on the ceilings, walls and floor near the door. There was patterns on it that I couldn’t recognize. It was drop-dead gorgeous!!
“Woahh..” “Amazing right? All of this was made… by me!” His originally calm face turned smug. His hands rested on his hips. Looking prouder than when I beat Alice at Jenga. “Stop flexing, you look like a Barbie doll that was dipped in a messed up paint palette with that hair.”
He ignored her and tapped his earpiece. A bit of static was emitted before stopping. He spoke something into the mic connected to it, then the door started to retreat underground. The inside was even cooler. The same green LED lighting on the walls and floor but not scattered randomly, it looked like cracks that appeared on the black walls. Colorful intricate decorations were also present. Soft circular white lights on the ceiling, forming a star constellation called.. Libra. If my memory serves me correctly. Everything here screamed a man’s dream.
A woman with iridescent hair tied up into a bun that was wearing a gray tank top and black baggy pants with a white star-shaped hair clip was waiting on the other side, arms crossed, looking very annoyed. “Elijah, we talked about ‘recruiting’ children. This is the 2nd time this week. And you brought two this time?” He walked inside and we followed. We didn’t even know the way back. This was the only option, which was entering a random person’s home or whatever it’s called.. a secret BUNKER!??
“Well, they were going to get found by the bacon soldiers and possibly get sent to the afterlife. How would I refuse a chance to save my own kind, much less literal kids?”
“Huh, that’s actually a good point unlike last time. You’re lucky that Felix’s parents decided to dump him when you called or they’ll file you for kidnapping. Though, should we dye their hair until it’s unrecognizable or?”
“Hell no. Keep their natural beauty. I dyed mine because I got a bounty on my back. And we don’t even know if they’re orphans or not.”
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The next days that followed were eventful. We were assigned a place to stay for the time being. And a guy named Danny was going to take care of us for now. He was showing us around before a yellow-haired kid wearing a black T-shirt and white shorts came running over when seeing us. He put his hands on his knees and panted. He stood up and asked to be friends.
“Hii!! *pant* wanna be friends?” He wheezed out.
“Ooo sure!!!! We’re best friends now!!” I exclaimed in happiness.
“..wow, that was rather quick.” I heard Elijah mumble.
We were so excited when we found out we both had almost the exact same interests. We talked about games, food, how disgusting tomatoes are, how we got here, how cool this place is.. just about everything. I never got his name until later. “By the way, my name’s Felix!!! What about yours??” “I’m Keith! Hello Felix!”
The lady from the orphanage- did I forget to mention her name? It’s.. Angelica I think. She hung a lot of missing flyers, she’s really worried. That much is obvious. I did tell her that me and Alice were going to that specific street. And coincidentally that same street was attacked by bacon hair terrorists. And that both of us didn’t come back for days. It’s normal to think that we got kidnapped.. we basically did but in the best case scenario.
Elijah saw and asked me where the orphanage was so he could tell Angelica to not be too worried.. Then there he goes. I had no idea how he connected the dots and knew it was me she was looking for, but well I was one of the only bacons he found that WASNT in the army and the posters literally had my face on it. That sure does tell him the answer.
I have no idea what he told her, but it might be that he adopted me because I was told I can stay there permanently now. I have no idea if Alice’s parents will come looking for her though.
I’ve only known Felix for like two days and it already felt like I’ve known him for my entire life. Elijah gave all three of us a decent education and free time. We learned how to fold a triangle that has such a sharp edge it can be used as a dart. Crazy right? Don’t even get me STARTED on the origami that Opal taught us! A swan, a sparrow.. we didn’t get to the Pegasus because it was too hard!! When we tried though, the paper broke, unfortunately.
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When I was like.. 8. I was brought to SFOTH by Danny (With some resistance from Opal) and watched Telamon, embodiment of War and somehow Creativity, sword fight. I immediately got a liking to it. He won sword fights in mere seconds. Astounding, impossible even. When the fight took longer than seconds, I noticed that all of his moves looked calculated, precise, elegant. And there’s when I begged on my knees for boss to buy me a sword. He bought two, but it was wooden. Light enough that I could grip it like a stick and not a dumbbell. I questioned in confusion, “Whose going to have the other one?” And he happily replied with, “I bet Felix would definitely want to try if he saw you holding one. That’s why I bought two! Just in case you two want to fight each other to the death.” And ruffled my hair.
Me and Felix swung swords at each other. It was messy and uncoordinated. But over time it got better and better. Our footwork just randomly decided to also get better in the process. Three years later does Elijah finally get us swords made out of metal. Oh it was heavy. Extremely heavy. I was mesmerized. When I was told that Telamon went missing, I was devastated. I had to take a break from everything and process what was just told to me. All my original passion was drained in an instant, but it came back the same way but even stronger.
Every spar me and Felix had, I had won most of them. Sweat-soaked shirts uncomfortably clung to our skin. I held out my hand and said, “You can win next time, definitely! No giving up now can we?” And he always replied with a “Giving up is NOT in my vocabulary.” And took my hand.
11yrso Alice thought a butterfly knife looked like a cool concealable toy to play with. And asked Elijah for money to buy one. Of course, he only allowed her to buy a dull plastic one and not the sharp real one because of safety concerns. She played with it so much that it became muscle memory, including the fighting motions. Even sparred with me and Felix with it. Us with the wooden swords, her with the plastic knife. She was surprisingly good at it. Stabbing us in all the vital spots. Not really stabbing, like fake stabbing. It isn’t really sharp unless you count the parts that had a bit of imperfections scraping our skin.(those hurt like hell)
She was given a real one the same moment we got our real swords. All of our weapons were shockingly customized in a way that we all loved. It was astonishing how Elijah managed to read our minds. Occasionally wounding the other’s skin slightly, but the wound wasn’t too deep. It got confiscated for a month when we almost got eachother killed, sadly.
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Opal asked me to help out Kaleb with the cooking. I didn’t want to. Last time I helped or even cooked at all, I burnt the water and made it explode. I don’t think Opal took that into consideration because she even threatened me with my entire collection of action figures. Not the action figures..
So now I’m in the kitchen, cracking open eggs into a glass bowl so Kaleb can use them. I’m not sure what he’s going to make, but I think it’s eggs. It IS the morning after all. I wonder how Kaleb even does this every day. I’m sitting here cracking eggs on an empty stomach and trying not to swallow the egg whole at this point. While he’s over there humming to himself, slicing tomatoes on a way that makes it look almost natural for him to do that. I’m impressed at how much he’s mastered this craft. I can only like make friends with strangers I just met in milliseconds. Nothing else.
Just me, eggs and Kaleb were present. The sound of the knife hitting the wooden cutting board and the sounds of eggs cracking were the only sounds that could be heard aside from his humming, with some occasional sounds of shuffling by me because I look like a shrimp. My posture is so bad that normal people would think my spine should be folded in two already. Well, it definitely should’ve. But it hasn’t.
Skipping over everything that happened because I forgot it all. I kinda just ate a protein bar and went on with my day. And then Elijah told me to patrol the streets.. again. Well, qI got pretty much nothing to do other than sit around and question my life choices. So walking around for like 15 hours straight is really nice, well I AM allowed to eat and have some fun during the shift but not too much. Don’t misunderstand. This isn’t child labor.
I do feel like me and Felix are pretty well known here. Considering that a lot of people yell “INCOMINGGG!!” extremely loudly whenever they catch someone in the act of about to commit a crime or looks sketchy, and having full confidence that we WILL dash over and do our thing. Some even had megaphones in case I was on the opposite side of the town. Which probably sacrificed some poor soul’s eardrums to call me over. The poor guy that got caught didn’t know what was happening before they got dropkicked in the face.
It cured a lot of people’s social anxiety for some reason. Maybe that they’re so used to yelling that out when there’s danger that they forgot they’re supposed to be scared of people. Which is a HUGEEE accomplishment!
But because like, my organization doesn’t really have a legal license for these stuff, so we dump them at the police station and run. Not sure what they think of us though, maybe they’ll shove us behind bars if they could. Who knows. But every time they spot me or Felix patrolling, they’ll greet us with a handshake or a fist bump and ask how we’re holding up. Well, i don’t know about the police chief. He seems pretty scary if you ask me. We often leave bags of donuts at their front desk in secret as a peace offering so they don’t do something like report us to the admins for being an unlegalized group.
Well, I think it worked. But still, this officer called Max scares me. He chugged entire cans of energy drinks that were obviously over the health limit and hasn’t died from a heart attack yet. He tried to ride a bike out of pure caffeine overload and almost died from how many times he fell over. Even Boss is terrified. He catches a glimpse of him and immediately uses the nearest person as a meat shield—usually me.
Some streetlights were suspiciously on in the daytime. Giving them a few kicks fixed their day-night cycle. Learned that from experience. The streets were bustling with people, shopping, eating, sipping a cup of boba tea.. basically the stereotypical busy street look in movies but 30% less people. There were gray rough roads meeting and going, being sandwiched by two sidewalks that were filled with clothes shops, restaurants, conscience stores.. that same accessory store.
I didn’t know that base was near the same street that..
No biggie. I have the money to buy that necklace now! If it’s still there of course, which probably isn’t. Alice did mention that she really liked it all those years ago, I wonder what will her reaction be?
I walked over and entered, the smell of wood and something like jasmine and air conditioner immediately hit me. The inside of the store were primarily made of wood, there were plants hanging off the walls, ceiling. there were earrings, rings, necklaces, bows, watches, hair clips, everything. The sole aesthetic of the place makes me think of one of those fantasy settings in a movie. Not overly decorated or plain. It’s right in the middle. The lights were a soft shade of an orangy-yellow. Just dim enough to not make the metal reflect the light into my eyes and burn a hole through it.
That.. is a terrifying long description.
The owner who’s at the cash register warmly greeted me with a wave, “Welcome, K! Good day?” Wow, didn’t know I was so popular. Even the store I’ve never visited since forever knew me. I waved back with a smile and replied, “Pretty nice, what about you?” They excitedly nodded and said, “Same! What are you looking for? We have keychains, rings, necklaces… a lot of jewelry. The ones made from metal and ores are on the right, ones made from plastic and other materials are on the left. There’s some creative accessories made for display and for purchase in the middle of the store by art students!”
ADD HERE
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The military and the bacon terrorists just gone in war. People locked themselves inside their homes to not be caught in the crossfire. I bow down to no god, I pray to no being. So I sat on my bed, hoping for dear life that my friends from outside aren’t DEAD.
If the bacons win, I’m going to ask someone to execute me on the spot and throw me in a fire as a sacrifice.
Pause for a second. That’s a bit too extreme. Maybe throw me into one of those backstabbing rituals and draw a summoning circle for sacrifices thing using my blood? I dunno man.
But uhm, I don’t know what the Admins are doing. I’m sure they could like fix all this. But the reason is probably complicated. So I won’t pry. The police and military presumably fix the problems that aren’t grass being red, someone flying with exploits and mauling people with scripts, hackers that kill innocent lives in a click of a button and mess up a huge area of land. Well I don’t think they can even go against those things. The Admins probably let them do their job because they can’t monitor everything, like random robberies and harassments and all that.
Yes, they made sure the justice system isn’t pay-to-win. That’s where I’m most grateful. The corrupt companies can’t buy their way out of court, that’s for sure.
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Danny turned on the TV while I was watching videos on my phone on the couch. He sat next to me as the news played, “Warning all Robloxians. It is advised to stay indoors or into bunkers due to Bacon soldiers having a chance of going out into the public and…” I do not give a f### about what the reporter is saying. And I didn’t notice a few others joining in on watching. It’s surprising that I saw Boss behind us. Looking at the TV, then back to us. “Y’know what to do.” There was a spark in his eyes that could never be mistaken for anything else. Oh he’s definitely not going to listen to the news reporter- “Call Adele and Micheal over here, we’re gonna have everyone separated into groups to patrol everywhere.”
He would never listen to the news reporter’s warnings. Especially when some stray bacons are wrecking havoc and some idiots decided to start committing crimes at this period of time. Almost all three teams were sent out. Winston from R, Kaleb from ours and Eric from B stayed behind. If anything happens in base, they can notify us immediately. Alice went with Ray and Catherine. Me? I just went with Geode. They- I mean uh, whatever gender they are right now is really good at combat and detecting enemy projectiles like stray missiles. Which happen pretty often in war(don’t ask how I know this).
We all patrolled different parts of Robloxia, scattered so far that some were confused at who we were, which was good. But unfortunately the news outlet would 100% say “A group of people that were not recognized from around here has been spotted saving lives. There have been several sightings of different groups of people wearing casual clothing yet the same shade of green, red and blue somewhere in their outfits reported. We suspect that the ones with the same colors are most likely related-“ shows a photo of a few of us together walking idk without us knowing that we got our photos taken without consent “-this is the only photo that we currently have. As the other civilians did not provide us anything other than the fact these are young adults doing the job that admins should be doing..” . and all that random s###.
The Leaders of R and B had their right hands following. Elijah technically had all of us as his hands so he spun a wheel and got Felix.
Me and Geode were walking around a place called Bloxburg. There were houses that looked like a plain gray box while others looked straight out of a fantasy movie. Honestly? What mayor approved of these, some even span over two blocks and there’s this one that barely even fits a person. I’m surprised at how they survive like this.
It’s pretty peaceful by far. And then my device rang. “Answer call.” I said. Evelyn’s voice sounded through it. “Hey so like, how is it at your post?” She asked, yells of pain were heard in the background. “Nice, peaceful. And about you.?” “A group of ten people are raiding the furniture store in Meepcity.” “What in the flying peacock do you mean PEOPLE RAIDING THE FURNITURE STORE?” “EXCALIBUR!” And the call ended adruptly. Evelyn, you called and then ended it this quick? Don’t leave me on a cliffhanger!!
But, her side of the fight be taken care of by now, Evelyn’s a really good spear user. I’m sure she’s disabled a few people already. Since said people are hauling furniture. And also since said people are either people with no fighting experience or muscular guys that can only violence but doesn’t know the correct way to. I’ve seen the latter one too many times. Poor things got their femur broken in half. By a sharp stick. Well. The sharp stick was very durable. And Kip did use his full body weight to snap it a few times. So well, not really completely sharp stick’s fault for breaking a bone.