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Sweat glistering on skins, pants in his ears.
Tyler's thin frame ist violently shook as he bounds once more over the toilet and pukes his heart, his soul, his everything out.
Moans, hands in hairs.
He wishes so much his mind, his life even would leave him with the flow of half digested food running out of him along with the tears.
The colours on his arm, her voice that sighed.
Tyler cries out at the image thrown at him, now that he begins to sober up, that he learns this is real, not one of his constant nightmares.
She had killed him with one name, four simple letters, she chanted it along, stabbing him again and again as she came hard and wild, under hands that shouldn't touch what was his own.
Tyler sinks back now, his head hitting the cold tiles behind him. There is no clear thought for him to find, not anymore, he snapped the moment she looked at him with her lustful eyes and smiled, fucking smiled while his supposed-to-be best friend finished her off.
Josh had faked shock at least, had tried to make him stay, but he had ran, as fast and far as he could, not caring where he went until he found himself in a public toilet, on his knees, his sickness overcoming his mind.
Lips sucked between teeths, tongues dancing along each other.
It was that part of his brain that was touched, the one Tyler avoided as far as he could, the one he only let take charge in his writing.
Hours fade in a blur. It's like a inebriation, Tyler doesn't get what he does anymore. He doesn't see where he is going, all he sees is the two of them, naked, between his sheets, in his bed, his house. He doesn't hear anymore, all that's echoing inside his ears is Jenna, screaming "Josh!" all over again. All feeling is gone as he returns to his house, walks in silently, into his studio.
Fingers moving on their own, opening the safe hidden under one of the controlls, closing around cold steel.
Love lost, trust broken.
There is no chance to end this any other way, nothing to make it good again. They are asleep as he enters the bedroom, but not for long, not when he stops being silent. Not when he grips the one he called a friend and forces him down on his knees, the barrel drilling into sensitive skin.
Her cries are covered by the bang of the shot for a moment before they go high pinched even more.
Looking down on his blood covered hands, the body falling down in front of him, Tyler finally lets go, retreats into the back of his mind, hands over controll.
He meets Blurry on the way, on the point where they're exchanging. Sobbing, slung his arms around himself he faces his demon. The last thing he remembers before he goes insane is Blurrys smile and the low whispered "I told you so."