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Xie Lian stares at the sedan wall in silence, dreading the end of the trip.
No. She will be cheerful. She’s survived everything that’s been thrown at her so far; surely she can survive having a husband. Lots of women do!
But, she reminds herself, not usually in these circumstances. Not after being handed off to a stranger as an insult. No one likes the type of woman that she is. No one wants to marry who they would see as a man playing dress-up.
Xie Lian pastes a smile on her face. Probably she’ll be lucky, and this stranger will politely marry her, tuck her away in the palace, and not even touch her. She might even get to continue with her sword drills with a real sword, if she plays her cards right!
The quality of the sound of the steps of the sedan’s bearers changes. Xie Lian peeks carefully out of the curtains.
A couple stall owners brawling in the street. A man getting physically thrown out of a brothel and retreating with his metaphorical tail tucked. A heavy-set butcher brandishing a knife. The general impression is… chaos, within limits.
Xie Lian looks closer.
A woman shouts something in a deep voice. Xie Lian can’t make out the words, but she seems happy, and her companion is friendly with her.
A man failing badly at fighting someone with more martial skill than him. Xie Lian notes the softness of his cheeks and chest, and the softness of the interaction despite the fighting. These people know each other.
Someone whose gender Xie Lian can’t make out, with the mismatch of styles and gendered signals that they are wearing. They purchase something from a stall, and the stall owner treats them like anyone else: rudely, but without real malice.
Xie Lian does not dare to hope.
The sedan stops, and a hand extends through the curtains. A man’s hand, with a red string tied on one finger, and silver vambraces. This must be Xie Lian’s husband-to-be. She lets her veil drop, places her hand in his, and is guided out of the sedan and toward where they must be getting married.
"Don’t be afraid," the man whispers. His voice is deep and soothing. "You are precious to me."
Certainly, his movements and the way he touches Xie Lian are exceedingly considerate. Xie Lian walks slowly, dread filling her footsteps, and the man does not rush her. Does he not know? Or, impossibly, does he know?
"I’m sorry," she says in a quiet voice, making no attempt to pitch her voice higher. Well, now he knows.
"I’m sorry," the man says. "I couldn’t get you out of there any other way. I promise, you will be treated well here."
Xie Lian doesn’t know what to say to that. Eventually, she settles on, "Do we know each other?"
"You wouldn’t remember me," the man whispers back. "But I’ve always admired you."
They reach their destination. Xie Lian moves and bows as she’s directed, head spinning, and soon they are married. She finds herself in an elaborate red-draped bedroom with her new husband, Hua Cheng. The door closes behind them.
"May I?" Hua Cheng asks quietly, touching the bottom of Xie Lian’s veil. Xie Lian nods, and he removes it. A concerned, handsome face stares down at her. Xie Lian knows what he sees: a masculine face, painted badly with makeup; Xie Lian hasn’t quite gotten the hang of it yet, but her thought process was that no makeup would be worse? Still, she’s second-guessing that now.
But he doesn’t frown.
"I’m supposed to be an insult," Xie Lian prompts, hoping to get it over with. "I’m aware."
"I disagree," Hua Cheng tells her gently. "To me, you are a noble, gracious, special someone."
Xie Lian’s thoughts whirl. She connects a few dots. So he’s like that! Perhaps it’s more common or accepted here, to chase after people who are different like her? Accepted enough that a king feels no shame in marrying one?
A new danger presents itself, and she blurts out, "I, I, I can’t get it up!"
Hua Cheng looks shocked for a moment, then seems to process it as the rejection that it is and moves a half-step away. Thank goodness; it’s not like it was very clear… her face burns as she imagines what they would be doing, if they relocated to the luxurious bed. No, being unable to get it up, if it were true, would not cause problems here.
"I won’t!" Hua Cheng blurts out in turn, holding his hands up. "I won’t do anything to you. Don’t… don’t be scared."
Xie Lian relaxes. So he has this preference, but he’s actually very considerate, like her first impression of him. "Oh," she says lamely. She brings a hand up to scratch at her cheek, and in the process, reminds herself of her bridal robes. They’re pretty elaborate. Even Mu Qing, griping and fussing about her obstinance and what it’s led to, struggled to get her into them. She tugs at them and wilts. "Is there someone who could help me with these, or…"
"Everyone will have a meltdown if they think we’re not consummating the marriage," Hua Cheng says, rolling his eyes, but there’s real frustration behind it. "I can help, if you’ll allow it."
Hua Cheng is exceedingly careful in removing her from her robes. His touch is professional, delicate, more gentle than any servant who’s helped Xie Lian with this. She stands there, being undressed on her husband on their wedding night, and thinks of the bed not far from them.
Well! Time for a distraction. "I like swords," Xie Lian says hopefully. Hua Cheng has treated her kindly so far; why not push her luck? "I was hoping that you might allow me to continue training."
Hua Cheng glances up at her, a tiny smile on his lips. "I have an armory," he says. "It’s yours now, of course. You’re welcome to take any weapon, or burn the place down if it isn’t to your liking."
Xie Lian flushes. That is genuinely a real danger, with her. "Can we go tomorrow?" she asks, barreling on. "What kinds of weapons do you have?"
Hua Cheng regales her with tales of the rare and legendary weapons he collects. Xie Lian listens with starry eyes. At one point, she grabs his hand and (correctly) guesses that he uses a scimitar, then makes him promise to a friendly spar later. Xie Lian finds herself in comfortable sleep clothes, makeup wiped off, tucked into the bed, talking with Hua Cheng until she begins to doze off.
"You can take your eyepatch off," she says sleepily, snuggling into the blankets. "That can’t be comfortable to sleep in."
Hua Cheng hesitates, but obeys, and Xie Lian smiles at him, barely awake at this point. She pats his cheek under the eye now obscured by fluffy hair. "Very cute," she says, and falls asleep.