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Kaz had been dreading this Saint's forsaken day for weeks. The streets of Ketterdam seemed impossibly more crowded than it did on a normal weekend, in preparation for the Festival of Saints. Long swaths of dyed fabric drapped over the top of alleyways, covering the streets in gentle hues of orange, red and yellow. Business was booming, as tourists and locals alike browsed the streets for relics of the saints, books about the lore of the saints, and even food shaped to represent the saints. A rose for Sankt Lizabeta. A sun for Sankt Alina. A dragon for Sankt Juris. Some argued it was for Sankt Zoya instead.
Kaz was sick of it. The buzz of the festivities dragged business away from the Barrel and he'd grumbled about it for days. Inej, on the other hand, was overjoyed. For the last two years that these festivites had been organised, Inej had been away at sea, unable to visit. This year she'd made it her mission to time her voyages to be back in time to witness the celebrations. Kaz would deny it, even at gunpoint, but he was secretly glad that he was getting to see Inej giddy about something. A lot of their lives had been harsh and bleak, running from one mission to another, barely stopping to heal. They had grown immensely to be able to just pause and, for once, experience life as normal people.
A band of performers passed below his window, annoucing that the last plays in honour of the Saints will be beginning shortly. Kaz sighed and closed his eyes, trying to tune out the choas.
"You will come, won't you?", a familiar voice called out from his right. Kaz looked up to see Inej perched up on his window sill, loose strands of hair fluttering in the gentle breeze against her face.
"I do not indulge in such dramatics", he grunted out, going back to the ledgers on his desk spread out in front of him. He could practically hear Inej roll her eyes.
"Your whole image in the Barrel is built on dramatics, Kaz."
"None of that is dramatic. What I do is necessary and what your Saints ask for is frivolous." Kaz felt more than heard Inej approach him, before she propped herself onto his desk.
"My Saints do not ask for such worship. Grand gestures and celebrartions are a way for people to feel like they're a part of something bigger than themselves, by honouring those who protect us."
"Which is exactly why it's frivolous."
Inej paused long enough for Kaz to look up at her. Her hair had escaped her braid, framing her face with long black layers. Her brown skin lit golden in the daylight pouring in through his window. Or maybe it was just her, radiating from within, with enough to spare for him and the darkness he carried everyday. Now that he was looking at her, he could not make himself look away. For a moment, he understood worship. She was the closest thing to a Saint in his life and he would spend an eternity trying to earn her kindness.
"I want to go," she said finally, her voice barely a whisper. "And I want you to come with me."
A beat passed. And another. Inej held his gaze, refusing to back down. Kaz's face remain unchanged, expressionless. Then he blinked and gave her a curt nod, before looking away from her and at the now crumpled pile of papers on his desk.
"I will be there."
-
Kaz meandered through the crowd, his hat sitting low on his face. He'd traded his signature crow-head cane for a simpler one in an attempt to be unnoticeable, but people in the Barrel had learnt how to recognise him. The crowd parted around him as he moved, avoiding contact. It got easier to avoid recognition as he approached the Geldin district, yet he stuck out like a sore thumb in his all-black attire against the backdrop of reds and oranges that decorated the streets. He passed by rows and rows of stalls and tents, with people chattering around them. A few of them eyed him as he passed, for his choice of clothing or for his limp, he wasn't sure.
He felt a familiar tingle in his bones as he reached the townsquare, and Kaz looked around, scanning the roofs till he spotted Inej. She was looking at him already, dressed in her usual tight leather. His spider. His wraith. She disappered and Kaz walked towards the edge of the crowd, against one of the buildings enclosing the central space.
"You came," he heard Inej's voice to his right. "You called," he replied without turning to look at her.
Kaz could smell her, the slight touch of salt and sea, with notes of jasmine. He knew it was one of those oils Nina had sent Kaz to safekeep, till he could deliver it to Inej after one of her voyages. It had unnerved him in the beginning, being able to notice a scent her. For the longest time, Inej had been undetectable, through smell or through sound. It was this very skillset that made her highly valuable as his wraith. But now, she had no need to hide or stay in the shadows anymore. She was learning to leave a trace, a mark, on the world, and he couldn't be more proud.
Inej pressed up against his arm for a brief moment, a silent thank you. After all these years, she still had moments of doubt about Kaz showing up. But time and time again, he'd reassured her, with actions more than words, that he will always show up when she needed him. She took a deep breath, relishing in the buzz she saw around them. All the vivid decor around the townsquare, the stalls lining the streets on the way to the square, the sheer number of people of all ages gathered to celebrate and honour the Saints. The chatter was impossibly loud but she'd never felt more at peace.
Inej reached her hand up into Kaz's. She felt him stiffen for one moment before he took her hand and squeezed. Inej smiled, her heart fluttering.
"You should've worn your silks," said Kaz, staring off into the distance. She followed his gaze and spotted a group of Suli dressed in bright red and orange silks to match the occasion. They looked like a family, the adults laughing while the kids ran around and squealed in excitement. A pang of longing filled her chest. In another life, that could've been her with her family.
"I don't belong in them anymore."
"Do not let her take that away from you." Inej knew he was referring to Tante Heleen. Her time at the Menagerie was nothing short of hell, and she was only just starting to unlearn all the horrible things Heleen had cemented into her brain.
"Silks or not, you are still the most deadly woman I know." Kaz was looking at her now, his eyes serious and sure. Inej swallowed, suddenly overwhelmed by the intensity in his gaze, and nodded. He stared at her for a beat before looking back ahead and whispering, "besides, I like you just as much in your leather."
Inej felt her heart skip a beat and her cheeks heat up. Kaz's face remained impassive but she could see his ears turn red. She huffed out a laughter. "I'd hope so. This is all you see me in."
His lips quirked up. "You'll hear no complains from me."
A bell rang out, gathering everyone's attention to the stage. A man stood on top of it dressed in red, waiting for everyone to quiet down before he began.
"Thank you everyone for joining today, as we honour our Saints, by thanking them for their great legacies and for their protection."
"Will they also talk about how they killed off their saints before deciding to worship them?" Kaz whispered to her before Inej shushed him.
"And now for the last and most awaited event of the day," the man continued. "A performance dedicated to Sankt Alina of the Fold." A roar of cheer went up, the crowd screaming and applauding. Inej touched her knife strapped at her thigh, the one she'd named after Sankt Alina.
A bearded man dressed in black and gold walked onto the stage, clearly playing the Darkling. A choir at the side of the stage set up a harmony with the violins. He spun his hands around in a show of how the Darkling called out to shadows and merzost centuries ago, to create the Fold that had split Ravka into two.
A group of people dressed in black, dragged on long swaths of black fabric onto the stage, meant to depict the Fold. The bearded man let out a loud, villainous laughter, tipping his head back. A woman dressed in gold, with a golden headdress, walked onto the stage. She fought off the depicted darkness with practiced grace, the black fabric rippling and curling around her. With a final spin, as the music reached its peak, the black fabrics were replaced by yellow ones, reflecting the last of the day's sunlight.
An applause went up in the crowd, as the Darkling kneeled in front of Sankt Alina and bowed his head. Flower petals rained down from the roofs of the building around the square. Inej let out a surprised laugh, dropping Kaz's hand to clap with the happy crowd. The performers all got up onto the stage and bowed, as the applause got louder with people cheering and whooping.
Kaz couldn't look away from Inej, the sheer joy in her smile. A pink petal was stuck on her hair and she seemed wholly unaware of it. Almost instinctively, he reached up to pluck it off of her hair. He saw Inej stiffen at the sudden contact, turning to look at him wide eyed. His fingers lingered against her cheek, feeling the warmth of her skin even through his gloves. Kaz held her gaze for what seemed like an eternity, before he saw her eyes glance down for a moment.
At his lips. Oh.
A bolt of desire shot through him, sending his heart racing and his mind conjuring scenes he'd let himself imagine only in the dead of the night. Her brown eyes snapped back to his again and he could've sworn he saw the same heat in them. His gaze involuntarily dropped to her lips, zeroing in on the way she was biting her bottom lip. This was her Saint's way of punishing him for all his crimes. It had to be. Why else would this beautiful woman stand here in front of him, looking at him like she wants him just as badly as he needs her?
Kaz cleared his throat and stepped back. A flash of hurt crossed Inej's face and he cursed himself, rushing to explain before she walked away.
"Not here," he whispered, almost pleadingly. Understanding filled her eyes and she nodded.
"I get it, Dirtyhands. We cannot have people thinking you have a heart in there somewhere."
He huffled out a laugh and shook his head. Saints knew he loved her.