Chapter Text
It was a quiet night — as quiet as it could get.
Contrary to popular belief, space was actually quite loud in Cosmos’ opinion, blaring in his ears with constant noise.
From the loud hum of stars, to the crash of meteorites against each other — Cosmos’ had long since grown used to it.
He was finally given a break, told to go visit his family with what time he had. Being able to visit his family was a scarce opportunity, and he always took the most advantage of it.
Retreating to his old bed (It basically wasn't a bed, simply a ridiculously large couch.) was odd, the fuzzy feeling of blankets becoming rather foreign to him over the course of his stay in space.
The blankets felt wrong against him, itching his metal and causing him to toss around in an effort to sleep — he knew he could simply turn off, but sleep had become something he dreaded, constantly terrified of Rez managing to get to him.
So here he was, sprawled out against the couch with a blanket drawn over him, with only his memories to keep him company — which wasn't exactly great company, if you asked him.
Spigot laid beside him, its black pearly eyes peering at him throughout the night. Eventually, Cosmos became aware of the plushie, reaching out and pulling it into his arms.
Firmly sitting up, Cosmos leaned up against the wall, curling his knees up to his chest and placing Spigot close up to him.
His mind felt weirdly blank — fuzzy and uncooperative. Throughout the entirety of the night, his mind seemed to drift off into scrambled sentences, barely able to string together coherent thoughts.
That was the first time he regressed.
And the first time he had become aware of it.
Planting his feet upon the odd terrain — Cosmos’ breathing hitched at the sound of distant screams arising from the planet's residents. Though, he forced himself to turn a blind eye to it. This was his job, after all.
A planet fully infected by Dark Star power, bound to collapse in on itself and affect other planets — now his and Gemini’s problem.
He had long since grown numb to the pleads and begs of whatever conscious life lived there, but he hadn't grown used to Gemini’s now-cold presence.
Whenever he managed to catch a glimpse of them, all he felt was harsh, cold guilt gnawing in his lungs, digging into him and refusing to let him go no matter how hard he attempted to distract himself.
“Plea—”
Cosmos’ raised his hand, wincing as the head of the resident came undone — plopping onto the floor with one simple lightning strike.
It was odd how easily he could take a life, a part of him was scared of himself — scared of what he became. A long time ago, Cosmos had sworn not to hurt anybody. Now? He didn’t know.
Gemini was, of course, far away from Cosmos. Buried in their duties and most definitely purposely avoiding the animatronic — they had yet to even spare a glance at Cosmos. Not like he cared at all, rather, he was grateful for the silence.
His vision blurred oddly as he walked throughout the ruined town, sparing a couple of glances towards the bloodied bodies as he shoved his hands into his pockets, fiddling with the fabric.
A shuffling noise came from the alleyway — followed by a terrified, hitch of the breath. Cosmos turned his focus towards it, walking towards the entrance and peering inside.
A child laid there.
He froze.
Cosmos’ hand planted against the wall, gripping it rather tightly — as if it would help soothe him.
He had to do this.
This was his purpose.
And yet, the sound of the child sniffling was enough to make his hand hesitate — freezing up painfully as he stood there like a deer in headlights, unsure of what to do.
He forced a breath, looking away so he wouldn’t have to witness the child’s death. And despite himself, a soft wince left him when the lightning struck down.
Unfortunately, Cosmos’ instinctively stole a glance at the now-still body, recoiling at the sight. He stumbled backs, feet tripping against each other as his hands retreated to his mouth, cupping it.
A weird, weighty feeling hit him in the chest — pulling him down, yet making him feel oddly airy, as if he was floating.
Double checking his feet to make sure he hadn’t accidentally lifted himself into the air, Cosmos took another step back, departing his hands from his mouth and gripping his shirt tightly, turning away without a second thought and marching off.
Yet he couldn’t get the kid off of his thoughts.
No matter how hard he tried, a sniffling sound remained in the back of his mind, haunting him constantly — as if the child had come back alive to torment him.
And in the midst of it all, he thought one, gruelling thing:
He was just like Eclipse.
That thought caused him to stop in his path, mind going oddly fuzzy as his thoughts cut out, head turning towards the alleyway once more, speedwalking over to it.
And he stared.
Stared at the body.
It didn't matter how hard he tried to divert his gaze — his body didn't listen, forcing him to stay still and watch the blood pool out of the mangled figure.
His chest tightened painfully, head buzzing with static.
Even his hearing began to cut out, replaced by a loud ringing tone that blanketed out the screams still echoing in the town, leaving him with nothing but silence and fuzziness.
This was his job as an Astral — so why did it hurt so much?
His legs trembled, feeling as if they were about to give out.
Slowly, Cosmos raised a hand to his chest, gripping the fabric and tugging on it desperately, a foolish attempt at soothing his breathing.
You’re an animatronic, you don't need to breathe.
His mind begged, repeating the phrase over and over.
Coldness plunged into him the moment he realised what he was doing — foot tapping against the ground desperately.
Fuck, not here, not now.
And most definitely not in front of Gemini.
Yet no matter how hard he tried to brush the feeling off, it only seemed to grow in strength, curling around his mind and denying him his right to coherent thoughts.
It left him scrambling to latch on to the sense of maturity, hands balling into fists as he still couldn't look away from the body, sending him into a deeper sense of panic.
No — this wasn’t supposed to happen!
“What are you doing?”
Cosmos flinched, digging his feet into the ground to keep himself from swaying. His mind told him to turn — but his body said otherwise, keeping his back to Gemini.
“Takin’ a little break, ya know, admiring the scene?” Cosmos’ gritted his teeth, forcing a neutral tone and pretending he wasn't delving into territory he’d much prefer not to be in.
Even without looking, Gemini didn't seem convinced.
“..By staring at a dead body?” Pollux asked skeptically, a frown most likely present on their face. Cosmos could hear them shuffling, most likely walking closer.
Finally, his body cooperated, twisting around to face Gemini a little bit too quickly, earning him a sharp pain in the neck.
“By staring at a dead body.” He replied with a grin, placing a hand upon the back of his neck and rubbing it quietly.
Gemini was only a couple feet away, their body coated in blood that was most definitely not theirs.
Cosmos’ had never really been scared of Gemini — but looking at them now, considering how they were towering over Cosmos.. He felt oddly like a rabbit cowering under the presence of a wolf. A very unhappy wolf.
He had grown used to the sight of blood, but the appearance of it on Gemini managed to send his mind screaming in fear, demanding he move away, tears already pricking at the corner of his eyes.
He quickly wiped them away, metal clinking against each other as he trembled erratically.
Gemini narrowed their eyes — deathly still, almost as if they were observing him. And of course, because of his luck, they just had to notice the waterwork in Cosmos’ eyes.
“I—” Cosmos choked out, hissing lowly to himself at how weak he sounded. He shifted his weight onto his left foot — then his right, continuing the rhythm so he could fidget discreetly.
And then he opened his mouth once more — and a hiccup escaped him.
Gemini raised their head, eyes widening.
And immediately, Cosmos’ vision became shrouded in blurry blobs, panic finally overtaking him.
The tears escaping felt like lava pouring down his face, burning him with shame as he desperately wiped at his eyes, only succeeding in making himself cry more.
Get it together!
Cosmos stumbled back against the wall, his back pressing harshly against it, pain sprouting across his spine immediately from the action.
His arm stilled against his eyes, resting against it to cover his vision — he didn't want to see Gemini’s reaction, he didn't want to see their disgust as they turned around and left.
A part of him wanted them to stay.
But he didn't deserve that — did he? He was nothing but a filthy traitor. Cosmos had gained their trust, then destroyed it without a second thought, no regard to their feelings. (He cared, he cared a lot — too much, actually.)
He didn't want to be little — if that was even the term, (He only spent 20 minutes researching before throwing his phone at the wall in a fit of rage.) He wanted to be mature and helpful. And he couldn’t be helpful if his mind was stuck in a constant state of regression.
Please, please please please please—
Soft hands wrapped around his waist. Cosmos departed his arm away just as he was lifted up, placed against Gemini’s hip, startling him momentarily.
He blinked away the tears, looking up — then immediately looking away, shame heating up his cheeks as the fuzziness only grew more controlling.
He expected to be killed, or injured. Why did Gemini lift him up? He had zero idea. He knew they were talking, but he couldn't make out the words they were saying.
Cosmos leaned back as far as he was allowed, pushing for distance — not for himself, but for them.
They were probably doing this out of pity, he noted bitterly, how selfish of him to force them out of their comfort zone to accommodate him.
Cosmos barely registered the change in surroundings, though the back of his mind perked up at the familiar sight of his family's home.
He closed his eyes, gritting his teeth in a desperate attempt to stop himself from hiccuping, no matter how hard his body fought to continue.
Soft, hushed voices arose from around him, ones he barely paid attention to.
Why didn't they just leave him there? Please, he wanted to be alone, he didn't deserve this.
He was placed onto a couch, (His couch, his home,) the hands grabbing him quickly departing in an almost panicked tone, leaving him feeling oddly cold and alone.
Somebody crouched in front of him, clearly attempting to get his attention. It took a while, but eventually their voice managed to cut through the constant ringing.
“Hey, hey, heyy?”
Cosmos blinked, biting his cheek to try and regulate his breathing, “Oh, hey. Sorry you had to witness that.” Cosmos sputtered out, pushing his hands into a thumbs up, shakingly smiling at Gemini — why hadn't they left?
Gemini slowly tilted their head to the side, before looking away.
Moon stood to the side.
When had he gotten there?
Cosmos pushed his feet up upon the bed, pulling his knees to his chest and burying his head into it — welcoming the warmth it brought this time.
“What did you say this was, again?” Pollux asked, her voice quieting at the end.
Moon pushed himself off of the wall, the space besides Cosmos dipping as he sat down. Moon began to rub the smaller animatronics back, startling him momentarily.
“Er, age regression,” Moon grunted, pausing his strokes when Cosmos tensed up harshly at the mention — a soft sigh leaving him as he resumed afterwards, “It’s some type of coping mechanism, my boyfriend experiences it from time to time, it’s where I learnt it.”
Moon’s voice was rather casual, as if he was discussing the weather. Cosmos tried to search for any hint of disgust in his tone, but found nothing.
But it was disgusting. Cosmos was an astral, not a child.
Another weak hiccup left him, curling closer in on himself.
“That doesn't sound convenient.” Castor noted, much quieter than usual.
Moon’s hand left Cosmos back, the space beside him becoming vacant much more as footsteps became distant, “I’ll.. leave you to him? Call me if you need help, I guess.” Moon shrugged — closing the door behind him.
Cosmos almost wanted to scream, cry and beg.
Don't leave him here! Don't leave him with Gemini!
They hate him, he’s going to die — he’s going to die!
When he looked up, Cosmos expected distance, anger or pain. What he didn't expect was the sudden hug.
Pushed into Gemini’s lap as they sat down on the couch, his head instinctively leaning onto their chest, hands wrapped around his waist — Cosmos stilled in confusion and fear.
None of this made sense. He betrayed Gemini, he hurt them. Yet here they were, hugging him and pulling him into their lap, arguably one of the most touchy moments the three had ever shared.
And Cosmos couldn't stop the shaky sob that escaped him.
“Fuck,” He whispered, sucking in a breath, “Im sorry — I-I didnt.. mean.. this wasnt.. It— why are you..? Fuck, I cant— I— I’m so sorry, please..”
He felt like his old self, trapped in Moon’s mind — alone and useless, nothing more than a flower that couldn’t bloom, forced to watch others sprout proudly.
Something was shoved into his hands, and he looked down to see Spigot. Without a second thought, he pushed it closer to himself, curling up against Gemini and continuing to sputter out apologies.
He didn't even know what he was saying, only able to repeat the words ‘I’m sorry,’ over and over again, followed by pure nonsense.
But Gemini didn't reply, sure, they tensed up — but they didn't shove him away, they didn't groan in disgust, they didn’t hurt him.
They just sat there.
Slowly, they started to move, rocking their body quietly — yet hesitantly, as if they were unsure if the movement would send Cosmos into a deeper panic, or relax him.
It became much more confident when Cosmos’ sobs died down into sniffles, the uncomfortable squirming he had been unconsciously doing stilled into relaxed limpness.
Cosmos fidgeted with Spigot, eyes drooping as he clung onto the tiny thing, muttering something incoherent to himself.
And then the fuzziness snapped — fully overtaking what was left of his maturity.
The fear and shame disappeared along with it, drifting into a quiet hum of childish static. He hadn't even noticed when his spare hand came up to grip onto Gemini’s shirt, using it as an anchor as his eyes fluttered.
Safe.
He was safe.
Cosm— Lunar buried his head deeper into Gemini’s chest, a shuddery breath leaving him as he finally closed his eyes, the darkness welcoming him.
“You’re okay — is that what they say..??” Pollux muttered anxiously and quickly, shifting a tiny bit to accommodate Lunar.
“..I believe so.”
“He’s kinda cute,” Pollux paused, “Still mad at him, though.”
Castor only grunted in reply.
Lunar opened his eyes momentarily, immediately closing them with a soft flinch after light had harassed the entirety of his vision, earning him a burning sensation.
“Oh,” Gemini suddenly began to move, hands leaving Lunar’s waist, immediately earning a whine from the younger.
“I’m just gonna go turn the light off, geez!” Pollux huffed, though a light giggle left her — the first giggle he had heard from her in a long time.
But Lunar didn't listen, gripping them tighter.
They're going to leave, they're going to leave him all alone. He can't be alone — not again!
“No,” Lunar whined again, “Please don't leave, not again.. Dont— please, don wanna.. I-I’ll be good! Please.. Please..”
He continued to beg Eclipse Gemini desperately, his voice slurred as Gemini paused for a second, before settling back down onto the couch, allowing Lunar to curl up against them once more.
“Hey — we're not leaving,” Pollux sputtered out, panicking. “We're just gonna turn the lights off, okay?”
“Don't leave..”
Pollux sighed. Suddenly, the weight he was leaning on shifted, becoming much lighter and softer, followed by the creak of floorboards.
The light’s turned off, allowing Lunar to finally open his eyes, meeting Pollux’s gaze. It was just her now, shifting around to accommodate Lunar due to their equal size, offering a smile when she realised Cosmos was staring at him.
Castor approached, placing a hand upon Pollux’s wrist and combining once more, their body stilling as they stared at Lunar— like a parent staring at their newly injured child, bracing for either cries or giggles to ring out.
Lunar only hiccuped in reply, placing one of Spigot’s antlers into his mouth, chewing on it without a second thought as he nuzzled into Gemini’s chest, like a cat rubbing against somebody's hand.
Gemini visibly deflated in relief, hands wrapping around him once more, a blanket being draped over his shoulders.
One of their hands reached his head, beginning to pet it slowly. Lunar felt himself melting into the touch, going completely limp against them.
While he couldn't see it, Gemini cracked a soft smile.
Everything felt okay — his mind mushed up and scrambled into something he couldn't untangle. He had long since given in to the childish demands of his body, and the reward was peaceful.
Lunar closed his eyes once more, muttering gibberish under his breath as he pulled Spigot closer, head lulling limply as he fully relaxed.
“You're safe now.” Gemini muttered.
And for once, he believed it.