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Sodachi was in love with the world. In fact, it was her first love.
They had met in high school. It was brief, but it left a mark. For most of the meeting, the oxygen in the room was consumed by Sodachi or an annoying pest. However, the world punctured through just enough. Her advice resonated with Sodachi. Even if that had been all she said, it would have left a mark.
Except that wasn’t all she said. There was more. She made a promise. She would come back every day. She would ensure that Sodachi got better.
Sodachi knew that it was love at first sight.
Of course, the world broke her promise. It wasn’t meant to be. Sodachi’s circumstances changed. She had to move, so the world couldn’t visit her. They couldn’t even be in contact. Perhaps Sodachi could have reached out to her, but how? She could have found her phone number, but would she have been receptive? It was better to treat it as a momentary connection. It wasn’t meant to be.
That didn’t stop Sodachi’s love. Nothing could stop her love. She was, after all, in love with the world. For a love so immense, nothing could get in the way.
Even as Sodachi graduated high school, the world remained in the back of her mind. As she moved onto college, she kept thinking about her. Even when she found other people to love, she always knew it was secondary. There was a stronger love that she could not ignore. She still held the hope that they might be reunited someday. It would be a textbook romance, right? Two lovers reunited after years. They could be called high school sweethearts.
It wasn’t meant to be. Sodachi realized that over time. Even as her love refused to diminish, the realistic side of her knew she should move on.
It was unfortunate timing. As she was coming to that conclusion, a certain name appeared in the news. A Japanese girl who had graduated high school and immediately devoted her life to peacekeeping missions overseas. Sodachi learned why the world had abandoned her. It was because she had a higher purpose. She couldn’t only help Sodachi. Pragmatically speaking, she was better off helping a greater number of people. Helping to remove mines in a country recovering from war or helping to mediate conflict. The world couldn’t be held back by one girl.
Her legend only grew. Sodachi followed her intently. It seemed that every week, there was some new story about her in a new country. In fact, she seemed to be everywhere. Cambodia one week, Burundi the next, and Serbia the week after. She was indiscriminate. If there were people in need, she would be there to help them.
It wasn’t just her legend that was growing. Other people were noticing. It wasn’t just Sodachi anymore. It seemed like more and more people knew her name. In Japan, her homeland, she was particularly known. Everyone was so proud that they could call her theirs.
Sodachi couldn’t agree with the sentiment. The world wasn’t hers. She belonged to the world. Sodachi merely wished she could have been hers.
Whether it be a fanclub or a cult, something began to emerge. Sodachi knew she had to be on the front lines. She wasn’t brave enough to send herself off to a foreign country for support, but then, the world didn’t want that.
Still, she could send her support. Even if the world would never hear her, Sodachi would make it known.
It was only natural that the world couldn’t hear Sodachi. The world was far grander in scale than anything Sodachi would ever know. The world’s perspective dwarfed Sodachi’s.
All Sodachi could do was be one of the rabble. If that’s all she could do, she would gladly do it, just to take part in the awe of the world.
Sodachi had something that every one of those other supporters lacked. Sodachi had met the world in person. It seemed like a lifetime ago, but she knew it really happened. It was a secret she had to keep for herself. She was aware that if she let that secret slip, she might become a prophetess. Sodachi wasn’t interested in becoming a member of a cult. The line seemed more and more vague by the day, but Sodachi wouldn’t allow herself to have it crossed definitively.
Her love was her own. It belonged to no one else.
One day, the whole of Japan was shocked. Tsubasa Hanekawa was coming home. It was a riotous event. It was generational. For the average person, it was the only chance they ever had of meeting her.
Sodachi was not the average person. If anything, that made her more desperate.
Yet she knew that she wouldn’t be able to. The world was within reach and she was a world away.
Sodachi stayed home. She went to work. She continued with her daily routines. Amongst the madness, people might have thought she was normal. Far from it. Instead, Sodachi reckoned with what it meant to love someone like that. She was in love with the world, but it only now struck her what that really meant. She might as well love a mountain or an ocean. The world was equally unapproachable.
As soon as she had arrived, she left. For whatever reason, she had come back to Japan, but seemingly, she was satisfied. She could leave. She was off to settle conflicts in countries Sodachi had never thought of before. She was off to wage war against war itself. The world couldn’t stop for one person. The world couldn’t love. The world was beyond such worldly things. The world was the world itself.
The world had made a promise to Sodachi. It was a world that she hadn’t kept. She couldn’t only help Sodachi. She had to help everyone.
Yet, at the same time, Sodachi was satisfied. Maybe the world had forgotten her. Maybe she was simply one of eight billion grains of rice. Even so, she lived in the world. She existed on it. The world was all-consuming. The world was beyond her and the world was within her. The world had kept her promise. Every day that Sodachi woke up, the world was there for her. Never would there be a day without her.