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(There are some stories that are written into the fabric of the very universe, destined to play out with every turn of the wheel, in every timeline and alternate reality.
Dongmin and Donghyun's story is one of them, though they don't always begin the same.
Sometimes they exchange short, banal commentary before moving on like it was any other day.
In those instances, there is no relationship. No love, no quarrel. Just a short acknowledgement of each other's existence before moving on to nothingness like ships passing in the night. Dongmin and Donghyun go about the remainder of their lives peacefully and happily but always with the vague awareness that something vital is missing.
Others result in sprawling conversations that last hours.
Dongmin learns more about fish than he ever thought possible, hears music in Donghyun's laughter and would write entire albums about the dimples in his cheeks and the curve of his smile. Donghyun is teased and teases in return, sees an entire ocean of possibility in Dongmin's eyes and wants to swim in them until he drowns or until he discovers every hidden treasure Dongmin hides behind his cocky smirk and rakish charm. Sometimes they fall in love. Sometimes they remain friends. Regardless, they linger in each other's lives like a constant.
A few result in arguments that range from serious to silly.
Strangely enough, these are the times when love blooms quickest between them. They find a kindred spirit, someone who makes up for what they lack and fills the holes they never knew existed. Sometimes that love burns out just as quickly as it flared to life, others it becomes an eternal flame that follows them to the ends of their days.
These are just some of their stories— began from the first "hello" and witnessed to the inevitable "goodbye"—because, as cruel as it may be, the fact of life remains:
All stories must come to an end.)
There are endings that are bittersweet but leave room for hope that one day they might be continued on…
Parting is such sweet sorrow.
Dongmin wasn't exactly sure he agreed with the sentiment though he supposed he'd have to give Shakespeare the benefit of the doubt that he knew what he was talking about. But parting didn't feel sweet in any way to him. Sorrow tasted bitter on his tongue as he stared at the gates leading into the airport.
A soft hand squeezed his, drawing his attention back to the man by his side, "What time do you have to go in again?"
Donghyun's eyes were swollen and red but dry; he'd sworn to Dongmin that he wouldn't cry until after he left.
"I look ugly when I cry. I don't want you to remember me that way."
Like Dongmin could really think Donghyun was anything short of the most gorgeous being he'd ever seen in his entire life, crying or not.
He reached up to brush back a few of the blond strands that had slipped out of Donghyun's bun, "So, do you regret agreeing to that date yet?"
Donghyun met his eyes unflinchingly, "Not for a single second."
They'd met at a coffee shop. Dongmin had accidentally spilled his Americano on Donghyun while he'd been caught up on his phone. They'd got to talking and Dongmin had offered to take him out to dinner that night to make it up to him. That one dinner had sparked enough interest for a lunch date two days later, then a picnic at the Han River the following weekend and before they knew it they were exchanging texts constantly, calling each other before bed and waiting with bated breath until they could see each other again.
It was two months of pure bliss, both of them falling head over heels for each other faster than they'd thought possible.
And then Dongmin had gotten the call.
The record company he worked for was expanding and they needed someone to head up their new studio… in the United States. Dongmin had been chosen as the top candidate by their CEO himself. It was an amazing opportunity, the kind that Dongmin had only ever dreamed of getting when he'd started making music in his bedroom as a teen.
Before he'd met Donghyun he would've jumped at the opportunity but the fact that he had made Dongmin hesitate. Donghyun hadn't allowed him.
"This is what you've always wanted Dongmin. You told me that on the first night we spent together. I don't want to be the person who gets in the way of your dreams, Dongminie. I want to watch you soar to the heights you deserve and even beyond that."
Which was what had led them to this moment.
"My flight's scheduled to leave at 6."
It was 3:30 now and he had to get checked in by 4 at the latest. They didn't have much time left and Dongmin had no clue when he'd be back. Jiho had said it could be as little as six months to get things settled but it could stretch out longer, maybe up to a year or more if there were any complications. At first Dongmin had wanted to break up, not wanting Donghyun to wait around for him if he was really gone for that long. Donghyun had vetoed that suggestion fairly quickly, obstinately telling Dongmin that they could make it work. They would make it work.
Donghyun hugged Dongmin's arm close to his chest, desperate to keep the contact even for a just a few seconds longer, "You'd better message me once you land, I don't care about the time."
"I will," Dongmin nodded, throat going tight at the way Donghyun's fragile grin trembled at the corners.
He couldn't help himself when he leaned in for one last kiss, the younger meeting him halfway with the same desperation. Donghyun's mouth was soft and yielding like it had been every other time they'd done this over the last couple of months. Dongmin couldn't taste the sweet vanilla of his lip balm this time because it was overwritten by the salt of the tears the younger finally let flow free, breaking his self-imposed promise. His own eyes stung but he managed to hold them back, wanting to at least be strong enough to allow Donghyun to break without having to worry about him.
Dongmin could cry later, he only had Donghyun for now and he wanted to make as much of the time they had left together as he could. But time was an indiscriminate thief and it seemed as though only a few seconds had passed before the alarm on his phone was going off, indicating it was time for him to check in. Dongmin blew out a heavy breath and squared his shoulders. His gaze dragged over Donghyun once more, trying to burn him into his memory.
He hefted up his bag and shot Donghyun a wink that probably looked more confident than he felt, "I'll see you later, bunny."
Donghyun's smile still wobbled in poorly-disguised misery but his eyes were bright and full of love, "I'll be waiting."
They cast glances over their shoulders to watch each other for as long as possible before Dongmin disappeared into the airport terminal and Donghyun was left behind.
As the distance stretched between them they both silently promised that next time they met, there wouldn't be a goodbye.
Some stories end suddenly— with no laters or second chances— and they leave behind a deep, ruinous wound that can never heal…
"Hello, is this Han Dongmin?"
The voice on the other end of the line was professional and unfamiliar. Dongmin frowned into his phone as he tried to work out what this was about, "Yeah, it is. Who is this?"
He could hear the mild frustration in his tone but honestly he wasn't in the mood to do anything other than go home. It had been a long day at work and all he wanted was to go back to the apartment where Leehan would already be waiting for him by the time he arrived. Just the thought of hearing his voice and feeling his arms catch him when he slouched against him for a hug was already lifting his spirits.
"My name is Min Solji, I'm a nurse at Seoul National University Hospital. I'm calling because you are the emergency contact for Kim Donghyun."
Dongmin felt his heart leap into his throat as her words crashed over him like a bucket of ice water, "I— I am! I'm his boyfrie—ah, fiancé."
He'd finally popped the question just two nights ago, on the eve of their four-year anniversary. Dongmin had been so fucking nervous about it too, even though all of their friends and his family had reassured him that there was no way Donghyun would say anything other than 'yes'. Dongmin had even taken a day off work without telling Donghyun so that he could fly to Busan to get his parents' blessing which they'd enthusiastically given.
He and Sungho had spent weeks searching for the perfect ring. And it was perfect, a simple silver band with a sapphire inlay that looked like the waves of the ocean. The second Dongmin had slipped it onto his ring finger he had known he'd made the right choice. Donghyun had been ecstatic as he'd admired it, turning it this way and that in the light of the restaurant like it was the greatest treasure he'd ever seen.
Donghyun was the greatest treasure Dongmin had ever known. His treasure should be on his usual bus home right now, the one that let off only a block from their apartment and allowed Donghyun to walk past the dog park every day. They'd been looking at adopting one recently. They were supposed to go to the animal shelter where Sungho had gotten his cat next week to visit with a few of the dogs they had there. Donghyun was so excited about it too, he'd been blabbering about it nonstop for days to the point that Dongmin was sure even the fish were getting tired of hearing about it.
…So why was Donghyun— his bright, adorable, incorrigible Donghyun— at the hospital? It didn't make any sense.
He was fine this morning. He would've told me if he was feeling sick enough to warrant seeing a doctor.
"Is he— um…" Dongmin cleared his throat, trying to restrain the nervous tremble that tried to fight its way through, "Is Donghyun okay?"
Maybe he'd just tripped and fallen at work again. He was always so excitable around the fish, it wouldn't be the first time he'd taken a tumble because he was expounding on the benefits of coral reefs for global ocean ecosystems instead of paying attention to where he was walking. Dongmin had warned him multiple times that he needed to watch where he was going when he rambled.
"But why, Dongminie?" Donghyun's smile was radiant, playful and teasing as he poked at the scolding frown on Dongmin's face, "I have you. I know you'll always catch me when I fall."
Solji hesitated for a moment before she answered him, her tone gentle and deeply apologetic, "Dongmin-ssi, there was an accident. A truck jumped the curb near the COEX Aquarium and hit a handful of pedestrians waiting to cross at the lights. Donghyun was one of the victims. The surgeons did their best but… I'm so sorry, he didn't make it."
And suddenly Dongmin's entire world came to a screeching halt.
The following days passed in a blur.
He vaguely remembered getting to the hospital that night and the others showing up soon after. He doesn't remember calling any of them but he must have, otherwise how would they have known? He'd been too numb to feel Jaehyun hug him and then start beating on his shoulders helplessly as tears started flowing down his cheeks. Woonhak's heartbroken sobs had rattled in his newly hollow chest like the smallest echo of his own agony. Sungho's steadying hand on his back had felt weightless, just like Sanghyeok's feeble attempts at comforting him.
Donghyun was gone. Nothing about that would ever be okay.
Someone told Donghyun's parents— probably Sungho, maybe Sanghyeok, Dongmin couldn't find it in himself to care who really— and suddenly in the gaping hole where Donghyun had once been there were the two people who'd made him who he was. Donghyun was the spitting image of his mother with her gentle face, placid nature and lilting way of speaking but he'd gotten his eyes from his dad, dark and sparkling like they'd both always been in on some joke that no one else was privy to. Looking at them was like the worst kind of torture because all he could see was what he'd lost. Dongmin couldn't hug her without shaking, Donghyun's phantom warmth haunting every touch. And talking to his dad felt like trying to speak through a mouthful of nails because he couldn't even hold eye contact with the man.
They'd offered to have Donghyun buried in Seoul. Dongmin had declined immediately, knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that Donghyun would scold him if he didn't get to spend eternity by the sea. When he'd told them as much they'd both laughed, a sad but fond sound that felt like a lead blanket over them all. So a week later Dongmin had stood stoically at the bow of the boat just off the coast of Dongnae wearing his best suit that Donghyun always said made him look like a movie star and had watched with a clenched jaw as the waves took away the last mortal vestiges of the man he'd loved beyond all measure.
It was only once Dongmin returned to the apartment that had once been theirs did he finally allow himself to break.
Even a week later, there were little pieces of Donghyun everywhere. The chipped bowl sitting on the island that he'd used for his breakfast that morning before heading to work. The university sweater he'd stolen off Dongmin when they'd first started dating and had never given back. The scent of him— vanilla, ocean and sunshine— lingered in the sheets and on the cushions of the couch. The answering machine of his cellphone that Dongmin had called at least a hundred times just to hear his voice again for those scant few seconds. It was all a knife straight to Dongmin's heart, robbing him of breath and flaying his insides as he collapsed to his knees and sobbed.
They'd been meant to have a life together and now Dongmin would have to live the rest of his with the ghost of what could have been.
Some endings are slow, creeping things that spring up as if from nowhere when in fact, they've been coming for a long time…
(Dongmin and Donghyun love each other— a fact as true as the sun rising every day.)
They were best friends since childhood.
It seemed an inevitability that they would fall in love and live happily ever after. Their friends thought so, as did their families, even Dongmin and Donghyun themselves did.
Their first kiss happened when they were 12, an accidental brush of lips that left them both reeling for years. They confessed their feelings for each other at 16 in a rush of words that stumbled over each other until they'd both been laughing too hard to feel anxious any longer. By 20 they were living together, mapping out what the rest of their life might look like. The future was a broad, hope-filled thing that they'd looked forward to greeting together.
If only such idyllic bliss could have lasted forever.
(Dongmin and Donghyun don't love each other in the way they used to— another fact as certain and cold as the moon's light when the sun disappears.)
At 24 a creeping dread snuck up on them, bringing with it something altogether different from anything they'd ever known.
It wasn't one single thing that made them realize that their time together was coming to an end but a thousand tiny ones.
After graduating Dongmin devoted his life to music, leaving little room to pursue any other desires. Despite his contentment with everything, Donghyun wanted to travel the world and explore as many oceans as he could. Dongmin thought that he might want kids one day. Donghyun wanted to own at least three Maltese dogs before he even thought about raising a whole human being. Dongmin didn't want to leave the city whereas Donghyun yearned to live somewhere by the sea where he could wake every morning with the scent of salt in his lungs.
The list went on and on…
The changes were proof that they'd grown. That they were no longer the bright-eyed children who had thought that just being together would be the solution for everything. But they were also the final nail in the coffin.
There were conversations. Long, hard ones that left them both shaking and in tears as they tried to cobble together enough reasons not to lose everything they'd ever known. It would have been more convenient, perhaps, if they'd been able to work something out. While it was hard to think of starting over again, they agreed it was for the best to part comfortably before they started to resent each other entirely.
As much as it hurt to admit, they knew they'd come to the end of the road.
For their love, dawn was no longer on the horizon.
Not all endings have to be sad though. There's light in them too and the joyous reflection of a life well-lived…
Dongmin and Donghyun have done it all.
They became idols, made music they loved and performed it for fans they adored. They attended Fashion Week in Paris, swam in the coral reefs off the coast of Hawaii and climbed Mount Fuji. They fell in love, got married, adopted a couple of dogs and then a pair of twins who became their everything. They raised their little family and lived their life together happily.
It's only fitting that such a beautiful life ends with them leaving it together too.
They laid side by side in the large king bed, Donghyun snuggled against the line of Dongmin's side like he'd done a thousand times before. They were no longer as young as they'd once been. The youthful glimmer in their eyes had been dulled by time and their hair was more white than black, no longer colored with the glitz and glamour of their days as idols.
"Remember when we debuted?" Donghyun hummed the question softly into Dongmin's shoulder, taking a deep inhale of the familiar scent of the man he'd loved his entire life, "Woonhak was such a baby back then."
Dongmin chuckled, now a hoarse sound that Donghyun remembered once being rich and full, "He was. Whined like a brat even when he was an adult though."
Donghyun smiled, feeling a bittersweet ache as he recalled their youngest's loud voice and boisterous personality. He'd passed away a few years ago, almost one year to the day that Sanghyeok had died. Sungho and Jaehyun were gone too, Jaehyun first from a cold that turned into something worse and Sungho six months later from a broken heart.
They were all that was left of Boynextdoor now.
His eyes drifted along the walls of their bedroom. He remembered picking out the paint color when they'd first moved in almost 30 years ago and the arguments he and Dongmin had had about the difference between swatches of the seafoam color they'd chosen (Donghyun still insisted the spring seafoam looked the same as the electric, no matter what Dongmin said otherwise).
Pictures lined the furthest wall. There were some of them at award shows with the others, their six smiling faces brightening the room with their nostalgic warmth. In one Dongmin stood holding his first prize for his producing work. Next to that was Donghyun at his graduation after getting his marine biology degree online with a 28-year old Dongmin standing proudly at his side, their newly-purchased engagement rings shining on their fingers. Their wedding photo was at the centre, Dongmin in his black suit that made him look like a movie star and Donghyun in his royal navy blue one that Dongmin always said brought out the sparkles in his eyes.
Pictures of the kids growing up filled the rest of the space. Myungho as a toddler playing in the sand at the beach in Busan as Donghyun helped him make the walls for his castle. Dongmin chasing Woori around the backyard, identical mischievous smiles on both their faces. The four of them at the Okinawa Churaumi Aquarium in Japan. The twins' graduations, their weddings, their own children growing up…
"We've had quite a life, haven't we?"
Donghyun sniffled softly, smiling as he nodded in agreement, "We really have."
Dongmin pressed a kiss to the top of his head, a decades-familiar gesture that still made Donghyun's stomach flutter even now, "I wouldn't have wanted to do it with anyone but you." He tangled their fingers together and raised their hands so he could kiss Donghyun's wedding ring, "You were always going to be my forever."
A few tears slipped down Donghyun's cheek that his husband gently thumbed away, "And you were every wish on a star I've made come true."
He shifted a little so his head was rested in the centre of Dongmin's chest, his heartbeat directly under his cheek. Dongmin accommodated the adjustment easily, like he'd always done. Donghyun had never had to change for Dongmin to love him. Like the ocean, they accepted each other's rhythms naturally and followed the flow of new tides without hesitation.
A bone-deep tiredness tugged at Donghyun's eyelids, at his very soul. He felt that same exhaustion in the way Dongmin's grip around his waist— still just as comforting and affectionate as it had been for the last 70 years they'd been together— started to slacken.
"Myungie came to pick up the fish, didn't he?" Donghyun's felt like he was speaking through molasses all of a sudden but Dongmin seemed to understand him anyways, he always did.
"He did," the older muttered reassuringly, "Yoona was excited that the corydoras were coming to live with them, remember?"
Donghyun did; their youngest granddaughter's eyes had been huge with happiness when she'd found out they were taking the fish in. She reminded Donghyun of himself when he was her age: curious, eager to find out everything he could about the wondrous little creatures swimming in their aquatic world and completely unapologetic about it.
"They like Yoona. I'm sure they'll take care of each other well."
Dongmin let out a hum that sounded vaguely like agreement, already half-lost to the blackness of sleep.
"I love you," Donghyun murmured, leaning up to steal one last kiss.
"Love you too, Donghyun-ah…"
They drifted off like that, wrapped up in each other's arms and let themselves succumb to the darkness.
Familiar voices that they hadn't heard in years suddenly came back, bright and clear. Hands grappled for purchase as four pairs of arms enveloped them. Woonhak's loud whining at being deprived of hugging Donghyun first won out over Sanghyeok's gentle laughter as he took the coveted spot. Jaehyun's smile was wide and radiant, nudging Dongmin in the ribs teasingly while Sungho scolded them for being late.
Outside of the dream— or perhaps they were finally waking from one— their breathing slowed before stopping completely. But it mattered not to either of them.
They were home.
But remember: where one story ends, countless more are about to be written…
It happened on a perfectly average day, just like every other time.
Dongmin was walking down the street minding his own business when suddenly he felt something — someone, actually— slam into his side, sending both him and whoever had just run into him crashing to the ground.
The pavement was rough under his hands as he pushed himself up onto his elbows, groaning under the weight of the other body still on top of him, "Fucking watch where you're going, would y—"
Dongmin felt the words die in his throat as he found himself staring into wide brown eyes that looked back at him with equivalent shock. Their faces were a scant few inches apart thanks to the fall and suddenly it was like all the air had been sucked out of his lungs. The man's gentle face was stricken with guilt, his plush lower lip caught between his teeth in a look of bunny-like nervousness, but he was undeniably beautiful even with the expression. Dongmin had the errant thought that he must have been an angel fallen from the heavens. Then he wondered if he'd hit his head.
For a second the world disappeared until the distant honk of a car horn snapped it back into place.
The stranger's voice was surprisingly deep as he started to frantically apologize, "Ah, I'm so sorry! Seriously, I didn't even see you there."
He scrambled out of Dongmin's lap and for some reason Dongmin found himself immediately missing the feeling of their bodies pressed together even though he'd just been annoyed by it. He took the hand that was offered to help him up, absently noting how soft it was and how the slightly smaller palm fit so well against his own. When his fingers skimmed over the back of that pale hand Dongmin felt the slight ridge of an old scar across one of his knuckles. He was inexplicably curious to find out what had caused it.
He was pulled back to reality again when the other man took his hand back and bowed deeply, "Again, I'm really sorry. I should have been paying better attention."
Dongmin shook his head and offered a nonchalant shrug, "To be fair, I wasn't really watching where I was going either."
A smile broke across that pretty face and turned his eyes into soft crescents that sent butterflies fluttering in Dongmin's stomach. Dongmin had to put effort into controlling his expression so it wouldn't show just how effected he was by it.
"You're really nice," he said sweetly, which wasn't something Dongmin often heard based off of a first impression, "My name's Donghyun, by the way."
"And you're weird," Dongmin grinned back at him, "I'm Dongmin. Nice to meet you, Donghyun-ah."
And so we begin again.