Archive of Our Own

Buck awakes with a violent flinch from the feeling of a tiny finger wiggling in his nose. His face scrunches in a deeply unflattering way, and his eyes fly open to the sight of hazel eyes and a bright, baby-toothed grin. 

“G’morning, Buck,” Theo whispers directly into his ear, which comes out more like a breathy version of his normal tone, making Buck flinch again at the volume. 

When Buck gets his bearings, he smiles softly at the sweet little boy crouched on his knees beside him. His mop of fine, brunette curls is an unruly mess, his Spider-Man pajama shirt has somehow turned inside out at some point during the night, and his finger has now vacated Buck’s nostril in favor of finding his own, but he is still the most perfect kid in the world if Buck does say so himself. 

“Mornin’, Monkey.” Buck yawns and sleepily stretches his limbs, then quickly snatches Theo up and tugs him close to his body, pressing kisses to his chubby cheeks and pulling delighted giggles from his small frame. He tickles Theo’s sides until he’s squealing in a pitch that’s enough to burst eardrums, then sits up against the headboard, pulling the boy into his side.

The soft morning light has just begun spilling through the windows, bathing the room in an orange glow reminiscent of the joy and warmth Buck feels by now getting to spend his mornings like this. Curled up with his kid in his arms and the sweet sound of his laughter permeating around them. It really doesn’t get better.

“Did you have good dreams?” Buck asks him.

Theo nods, grinning so wide that his dimples form canyons in his cheeks. “I dreamed we got a puppy.”

Buck raises a brow. “A puppy? Was it cute?”

“Mhm. He was small and fluffy and had a big spot on his tummy.”

“Oh, wow, he sounds adorable. What was his name?”

Theo considers this for a moment, no doubt trying to come up with a name on the spot, then with a firm nod, replies, “Eddie.”

Buck snorts. “Eddie, huh? That’s a good name. But don’t you think we’d get him confused with the human Eddie?”

As if the issue hadn’t occurred to him, Theo frowns, tapping his chin with his finger like he’s five times his age. “Oh yeah. Maybe we’ll call him…Eddie Doggy.”

Buck’s chest squeezes with fondness for this boy. “Eddie Doggy, I like it. We can call him Doggy for short to avoid any confusion.”

Theo nods, content with that answer. “Yes, so we don’t give human Eddie, Eddie Doggy’s food.” 

“Exactly,” Buck confirms, face hurting from smiling. “We can’t have that happen, can we?”

Theo is quiet for a moment as Buck watches something work itself out in his mind, but after nearly four months as guardian of the miniature version of himself, Buck knows exactly what he’s thinking before he even says it. Buck should’ve realized exactly where this conversation would lead as soon as the word ‘puppy’ was mentioned. 

Theo’s wide, pleading eyes meet his, pouting his lower lip in the way he quickly learned Buck has trouble saying no to. “Can I have a puppy?”

Buck has always wanted a dog. He’s thought about getting one so many times since settling in LA, but never committed to it. With his job, it’s just not feasible without someone at home to take care of it while he's on twelve- or twenty-four-hour shifts. It’s hard enough to do with children, and adding a dog would simply be like adding another one. It’s why none of the other 118 families have pets. Well, besides the ones that need far less attention, like Denny’s goldfish. 

But Buck would still like a pet of some sort eventually, so he considers a compromise. 

“We can’t have a puppy, because I work too much to take good care of it,” Buck explains. “But…maybe we could get a cat?”

Theo’s eyes brighten, and he shoots up, bouncing excitedly on his knees. “Yes! Yes, I want a kitty!”

Buck points a finger at him, looking faux-stern, but his smile definitely doesn’t sell it. “I’ll tell you what… If you play super well at your soccer game today, then maybe we can get a kitty.”

Theo nods, still bouncing like a little jumping bean. “If I score a goal?” 

“Yes, if you score a goal,” Buck agrees. 

“I will, I will,” Theo says eagerly. 

“Alright, then… Let’s go get ready—”

The sound of the front door opening echoes down the hall, followed by soft footsteps and the click-clacking of crutches on the hardwood floors. 

Theo sucks in a sharp breath and pushes himself feet-first off the mattress before taking off in a sprint out of the bedroom. “Eddie! Chris!”

“Hey, Spider-Man!” Eddie says, groaning dramatically as he presumably picks Theo up. “You ready for the big game today?” 

“If I score a goal, I get a kitty!”

Eddie’s laugh filters down the hall like music to Buck’s ears. “Is that so? I think we should go see what your Buck says about that. Chris, would you mind setting the table?”

“Yeah, I got it,” Chris replies in his usual teenage monotony. 

Buck chuckles to himself and flops back against the pillows, just staring up at the whirring ceiling fan for a moment as his chest fills with contentment. He was wrong earlier; it does get better. Having all of his boys together under the same roof is the happiest Buck can get; he’s sure of it. 

The sound of socked feet approaches until there’s another presence in the doorway. 

“Rise and shine, Buckley, it’s game day,” Eddie says, his smirk evident in his voice. 

Buck lolls his head to the side and suddenly can’t breathe when he takes in the sight before him. Eddie, leaning against the doorframe, Theo on his hip as if he belongs there, with rosy cheeks and crinkles around his brown eyes. He’s decked out in a light blue T-shirt and cap, and the words ‘Dragons Soccer’ printed across the front in purple ink. 

He’s absolutely breathtaking. Literally. Because Buck still can’t quite remember how to make his lungs work with Eddie looking at him like that. 

“Morning,” Buck somehow manages to supply.

Eddie steps into the room, closer to the bed, then proceeds to launch Theo out of his arms and onto the mattress beside Buck, making the kid squeal with laughter. 

Theo straightens himself and holds his arms back up to Eddie. “Again!”

“Oh, you don’t know what you’ve just done,” Buck tells him. 

Eddie chuckles, then drops himself down on the edge of the bed, which is…new. 

Even while Buck was detoxing, Eddie sat dutifully at his bedside, yet never on the mattress itself. It’s never been like this before. This casual. Like it’s something they do all the time. Because it’s not, despite how much Buck wishes it would be.

“No more, Buddy,” Eddie tells Theo, pulling him back into his lap. “You gotta save your energy for your game.”

Theo seems to accept this, nodding like the idea is perfectly logical. “I need to score to get a kitty.”

Eddie’s questioning, yet amused gaze finds Buck’s. “What’s this about a kitty?”

Buck rolls his eyes fondly. “I told him if he scores today, then maybe we’ll get one.” 

Eddie snorts. “Sounds like a fair deal to me,” he says, then presses a kiss to Theo’s curls. “We brought breakfast. Chris insisted on iHOP pancakes, so we got ‘em to go.” 

“Yay!” Theo says, hugging Eddie’s neck. 

Buck’s stomach flutters—and grumbles—as he groans. “You’re the best.”

“Don’t thank me yet. Pretty sure they forgot your bacon.”

“Don’t care. I’m so hungry I could eat—” Buck shifts forward, lunging towards them and grabbing Theo’s leg. “You!”  He pretends to bite up and down his calf as he squirms and squeals with laughter. Theo manages to wriggle out of Eddie’s arms, slide off the bed, and run out of the room with record speed. 

Buck sighs and drops down on his back beside Eddie, head nearly hanging over the edge. He looks up at Eddie, who’s staring down at him with a look that Buck has only ever seen from him once before. From when he found Buck in New Mexico, crouching over him much like this, that same sweet and fond expression that makes Buck feel like he’s something precious. He equally loves it and is terrified of it, but can’t seem to look away. 

Buck isn’t sure how long they stare at each other; it could be seconds or minutes, until Eddie pats a hand on his thigh and clears his throat. “Come on, Bud. Gotta leave in an hour.” He then taps Buck once on the end of the nose with his fingertip and stands, holding out his hand for Buck to take. 

Buck is momentarily stunned. Eddie has never booped him on the nose before. They don’t boop each other. That’s just… It’s not what they do. Now, Buck can’t say he’s never thought about it. Sometimes Eddie just looks too perfect, too adorable, and Buck wants nothing more than to boop his gorgeous, crooked nose. But he never has, because again, it’s not what they do. Until now, apparently. 

Eddie juts his hand out a little further, spurring Buck from his daze. He swallows past the lump in his throat, rolls over, and lets Eddie pull him to his feet. Buck lets go of his hand, missing the warmth immediately, but is both relieved and startled when Eddie’s hand finds the small of his back as he leads him out of the room. 

Fifty-five minutes later, it’s like a madhouse with the Buckley-Diaz clan. 

“Theo, shoes on!” Eddie calls from the kitchen, elbows-deep in the ice chest as he fills it with Powerade, Caprisuns, apple sauce pouches, and enough ham and cheese sandwiches to feed a small army. Maybe they’re not feeding an actual army per se, but Buck was selected to provide the team snacks for the first game of the season, and naturally, Eddie has also taken on the task of helping, so they had to put together enough to feed an army of hungry four-year-olds. 

Buck zips up the smaller lunch box of food for him, Eddie, and Chris, and slings it over his shoulder as he grabs one side of the ice chest while Eddie grabs the other. They haul it out to the truck—taking Eddie’s since it’s bigger and he got an extra car seat for Theo after only a week of Buck taking him in—then they run back in to collect the precious cargo. 

“Your jersey’s on backwards,” Chris’s voice carries from Theo’s room. 

The teen has been tasked with helping Theo get all of his soccer gear together in his backpack, and seems to have done a great job, except when Buck and Eddie enter the room, Theo is still stark naked as the day he was born, save for his jersey halfway over his head and one arm sticking up awkwardly through the wrong hole. After nearly keeling over in laughter and resisting the urge to take a photo, Buck and Eddie bump fists and tag-team getting Theo dressed. Eddie grabs his underwear and shorts from the drawer, slipping them on the wiggly kid with practiced ease, while Buck pulls on his jersey in the correct direction. 

Buck holds Theo up by his armpits as Eddie slides on his socks and shoes one at a time, then passes him to Eddie, who sets him on his hip. 

“All ready?” Buck asks, checking around the room for anything they missed. 

“Ready!” Theo says, bouncing excitedly in Eddie’s arms.

“Chris, go load up, Bud,” Eddie tells him. “Your Switch is already in the backseat.”

Chris nods and heads outside as Buck grabs Theo’s backpack, and they follow after him. 

By the time they lock up the house and everyone is buckled in, it’s eight o’clock on the dot. Both men sigh and shoot each other relieved smiles before pulling out of the driveway. 

The soccer fields are located at a community park about thirty minutes away with Saturday morning traffic. There were leagues at a couple of other parks a bit closer, but this one specifically was recommended by Hen and Karen, where Denny played when he was younger. 

From the few practices they’ve had so far, Buck has been enjoying it as much as Theo, understanding very quickly why the Wilsons recommended it. The entire league is coed and geared toward kids with queer parents and allies. It’s just a very warm and welcoming environment focused on building community and sportsmanship while also encouraging the kids’ individuality. It’s also just very gay, so that’s a huge plus. On Theo’s team specifically, nearly every child’s parents are same-sex couples, or queer single parents, and it’s kind of the best thing Buck has ever been a part of. God, it’s things like this that make him really love living in LA. 

The only issue is, Buck hasn’t exactly mentioned all of this to Eddie. 

When Buck first told him that he signed Theo up for soccer, Eddie had been completely on board and actually took it upon himself to buy all of them matching team shirts with Theo’s name on the back to wear to the games. If Eddie had done a little digging on the league’s website, he probably could’ve drawn some conclusions about the demographic, but otherwise, Buck just hasn’t really figured out how to mention it. It’s not like it’s really necessary to bring up—Eddie is definitely more than welcome to be there, and it’s not like he would have a problem with any of it—but Eddie’s also never been in a space like it before, and Buck finds himself unreasonably nervous about not warning him beforehand. 

“Okay, time for sunscreen,” Eddie says when they arrive at the park, hopping out of the truck. 

Eddie finds the bottles rolling around on the back floorboard, passes one to Buck, and makes quick work of lathering the lotion on every inch of Theo’s exposed skin, despite how much he whines in protest. Buck does the same to Chris, who also protests, but his whining includes a lot more groaning and eye rolling. With the kids done, they opt to wait until they get situated by the field before doing themselves. 

Eddie grabs Theo and carries him in one arm while toting his backpack and a camping chair in the other, and something about the sight makes Buck trip over his own feet. But he recovers, grabbing more bags and chairs from the back, knowing they’ll have to make a second trip for the ice chest, and follows the Diazs with a very dry mouth. 

His mouth goes even drier when they walk through the front gate. If Buck thought the league was gay just from the first couple of practices, his jaw nearly hits the ground when he sees the setup for game day. 

“Wow, it looks like pride came early this year,” Chris says with a laugh. 

There are rainbows everywhere—pride flag pin-up banners strung across the small set of metal bleachers, colorful tape wrapped around the goals and benches, streamers and balloons placed tastefully on the concessions and bathroom building. It definitely doesn’t look tacky, but for anyone who hasn’t been a part of something like this before, it can be quite the shock. 

Buck glances at Eddie to gauge his reaction, but surprisingly, he doesn’t have one. He looks the pinnacle of nonchalant, like all of this is perfectly normal to him. Like it’s not his first time showing up to a kids' soccer game that looks like a pride parade just exploded all over it. Something in Buck’s chest loosens a little. 

Buck leads them over to the side of the field where some of the other parents have set up camp, and picks a nice, shady spot a respectable distance away. They drop their bags and pop up their chairs, and Chris quickly gets situated in one of them with his Switch, already tuning out. 

“I’m gonna go grab the ice chest,” Buck tells Eddie. 

“Need a hand?” 

He shakes his head. “Nah, I got it. Would you mind putting Theo’s shin guards and cleats on?”

Eddie nods and tosses Buck the keys, and he leaves the boys to jog back to the truck. When he returns with the cooler a few minutes later, fingers aching and sweat beading at his brow, Buck’s breath stutters when he sees Theo’s coach, Coach Tina, approaching Eddie and shaking his hand.

She’s a six-foot-tall, butch lesbian who actually looks pretty similar to Buck except for her bright green eyes and her being in her mid-forties. She’s absolutely jacked and could probably beat him out in bench press if he’s being honest. She’s also just incredibly kind, wonderful with kids, and really fucking loves soccer. 

She and Eddie look over at him when he drops the ice chest down by their chairs. 

“Oh, hey, Buck,” Coach says warmly. “How are you guys doing?”

Buck smiles at her as he catches his breath. “Hey, Coach, we’re good, yeah. Ready for some soccer. I see you met Eddie?”

She nods back at him, and something about the look in her eyes makes Buck’s stomach flip. “I did.”

“This is my son, Chris,” Eddie tells her, ruffling Chris’s curls. The teen looks up from his Switch with a frown, then schools his expression into something much more friendly when he realizes he’s being introduced to someone new, and he shakes her hand.

“Ah, nice to meet you, Chris,” she says, then turns to Theo, sitting in a chair, now wearing his shin guards and cleats. “And how about you, big guy…Ready to play today?”

Theo nods. “Yes, my Buck said I get a kitty when I score!”

“Wow, a kitty?” Coach exclaims. “I can’t wait to hear all about it when you get one.” She gives Theo a high-five, then glances between Buck and Eddie and winks.

Buck chuckles softly and tells her, “By the way, we’ve got all the team snacks and drinks in that blue ice chest right there. All peanut-free.”

“Amazing. Thank you, guys, so much for doing that,” she says. “I’ll keep it over on the bench, and bring it back to you after the game if that’s alright.”

“Yeah, no problem,” Eddie says. “Let us know if we can do anything else.”

“You’re sweet, thank you.” She pats him on the upper arm, then looks back at Theo. “Come on, Kiddo, let’s go warm up with the rest of the team, hm?”

He grins excitedly, sliding off the chair and taking off across the field to join his teammates as Coach follows behind him with the ice chest, seemingly having a much easier time carrying it than Buck did. 

Buck uses the hem of his T-shirt to wipe the sweat from his face, and when he drops it, he’s surprised to see Eddie hyper-focused on his torso. Buck glances down at himself, making sure his zipper isn’t undone or there’s not a bug on him or something, but he seems to be in the clear. 

“What?” Buck asks him, tilting his head. 

Eddie blinks out of it, looking strangely caught. “Oh, uh—I have one of those hand-held fans if you want it.” 

“Yeah, sure, thanks.” 

Eddie nods and visibly swallows before squatting down to dig in one of the tote bags. He passes over a small, battery-powered fan that they’ve used many times during their zoo trips over the years, which Buck is very grateful for, because he doesn’t want to be a sweaty mess this early in the day. He plops down in his seat with a sigh, and next thing he knows, Eddie’s dragging his chair a bit closer and following suit, their shoulders brushing slightly and sending more heat through Buck’s body that he definitely doesn’t need right now. Buck tries not to mull over this, or the fact that Eddie was staring at his bare stomach. Eddie doesn’t mention it, so neither does he. 

Buck has noticed things like this happening a lot more lately. Catching Eddie staring at him. Touching him more, even in situations where it’s not necessary—a brush of shoulders, a hand on his back, a pat on the knee. Integrating himself even further into Buck and Theo’s orbit than he ever has been before. Buck has simply attributed noticing these things to finally coming to terms with being in love with Eddie—yeah, Tommy and Maddie were right, as much as it pains him to admit to himself. So, since he’s become conscious of it, he’s also become hyper-aware of anything Eddie does that his brain desperately wants to read as something it’s not. 

Because it’s not more than platonic to Eddie. 

Buck knows this viscerally. Eddie is his straight best friend, and their friendship will never be anything more to him. Buck has accepted this long before grappling with his own feelings. And that’s perfectly fine. It has to be. There’s no point in dwelling on it otherwise. 

So he doesn’t dwell on it. He takes what he’s given and is thankful for it, but he doesn’t beg for more. 

“Sunscreen?” 

Buck startles out of his thoughts and glances at Eddie, who’s holding out the bottle toward him. He nods and takes it, lathering some onto his arms and legs, then does his best to get his face and the back of his neck, but apparently, it’s not good enough for Eddie, because he suddenly huffs an amused laugh and says, “You missed a spot. Come here.” 

Buck swallows thickly and listens, turning toward Eddie, because he’s a very weak man. Eddie rubs a dollop of lotion between his hands and begins applying it to Buck’s face. With Eddie this close to him, looking at him this intently with his tongue poking out of his lips in focused determination, Buck has to close his eyes. Eddie’s fingers move in a motion that Buck can only describe as tender, carefully covering every inch of skin as if he’s painting a canvas. And when Buck feels the pad of Eddie’s thumb swipe over his lips, his breath stutters in his chest, and his eyes fly open. 

Eddie looks apologetic, but also not really, smiling softly as he pulls away and closes the cap on the bottle. “Sorry—Lips can burn, too.” 

Buck doesn’t respond to that, still trying to figure out how to make his lungs work properly again. When he eventually manages, he switches gears and gestures down to the bottle. “Your turn.”

Eddie shakes his head. “I’m fine, I just tan. Unlike your pasty ass,” he says with a teasing smirk. 

Buck huffs indignantly. “Hey, everyone needs it; it doesn’t matter what color you are. I swear, we have this argument every time we’re outside like this. You need to wear it to prevent wrinkles and skin cancer.”

Eddie raises a brow. “Wrinkles and skin cancer? Alright, Dr. Google.” 

Buck rolls his eyes. “You’re literally a paramedic. Seriously, it’s important if you want to keep your youthful glow.”

“My youthful glow—” Eddie cuts himself off with a laugh. “Buck, what the hell are you talking about? Why do you care about me keeping my youthful glow?”  

Fuck, abort mission. Abort. Alarm bells blare inside his mind, and he tries to save himself. “What—No, I don’t, I just—I don’t want you to get cancer, Eds. That’s like…really bad.”

And at that, Eddie’s face shifts into a fond expression, one that makes Buck want to squirm out of his chair. He’s just looking at Buck with a small, crooked smile, similar to how he looks at Theo when he says or does something cute. Buck’s chest feels warm and gooey all of a sudden. 

“You’re right, cancer is really bad,” Eddie says eventually, still smiling at him. He passes over the sunscreen bottle again. “Will you do my face?” 

Buck nods before he even processes what he’s agreeing to, then realizes he now has free rein to touch Eddie. He gets to trace the expanse of his face and trace his skin with his fingers, feel every bump and ridge. But he can’t let himself get carried away. He’s not a creep. So he takes a deep breath and applies the lotion to his face with practiced precision. Eddie keeps his eyes open the entire time, but Buck doesn’t let himself look directly into them, getting the job done as quickly, yet thoroughly as possible, while his body feels like it’s going to burst into flames. 

“Thanks.”

“Welcome,” Buck replies, voice a little strained as he tosses the bottle into the bag, and turns back to the field to locate Theo, doing everything he can to avoid meeting Eddie’s eyes. 

The other parents and spectators slowly trickle in, setting up their own camps nearby. Several wave at them in greeting as they pass, and some with whom Buck is more friendly give him a look when they see Eddie and Chris beside him. No one stops for a long chat yet, but the day is still young, and Buck just has to hope like hell that none of them says anything he knows they’re thinking. At least not where Eddie and Chris can hear. 

The game starts soon after, and Theo’s team is playing against another team called the Lions. With this age group being the youngest the league offers, none of the kids have numbered jerseys, because it’s not really necessary at this level, and it helps avoid arguments between them. Same goes for keeping score. 5U soccer is like herding a bunch of cats, but with a ball thrown in the middle of them to catch their attention if they’re close enough. The typical rules are very loosely followed, but it’s mostly just a bunch of kids running around the field chasing a ball and looking very cute while doing it. 

Theo really seems to be thriving in the sport so far. Buck had initially signed him up to give him some sort of outlet for his seemingly nonstop energy, hopefully helping him be not so hyperactive at home to, in theory, help give Buck a break sometimes. It seems to have the desired effect. Theo loves running up and down the field, half of the time forgetting that he’s supposed to be focusing on the ball, in favor of racing his friends or chasing butterflies. And this game is no exception. 

Getting the kids to line up properly at the start is no easy feat, but Coach Tina and the Lions’ coach somehow manage it to an acceptable degree. For the first few minutes, when the ball is introduced, most of the kids are immersed in the game and trying to get their own chance to kick it. Theo makes a great pass to one of his teammates—almost certainly by accident, but Buck and Eddie both shoot up out of their chairs and cheer for him, the noise startling Chris enough that he sends them an unamused glare. 

As time goes on, though, a few kids get distracted, another one gets upset that they haven’t gotten a chance to kick the ball yet and starts crying, and no less than three of the kids on the benches have their fingers up their noses. It’s chaotic as hell, but it’s definitely entertaining. Even Chris shuts off his Switch in favor of watching everything play out. 

Buck finds himself glancing over at Eddie again, smiling to himself at how invested he is in this. He’s literally on the edge of his seat, clapping his hands and shouting encouragement anytime Theo even gets somewhat near the ball. 

A lot of people wouldn’t know this about him, because he tends to have a very calm demeanor, but Eddie is one competitive motherfucker. He’s been competing in sports since he was a kid, and that attitude has continued through his adult years, coming out full force when the occasion calls for it. Treasure hunts, firehouse billiards, firefighter competitions, and, as it turns out, 5U soccer games. 

“Yes, Theo!” He shouts, cupping his hands around his mouth. “Get it, Bud! Wait, oh my god—” He hits Buck excitedly on the arm as Theo gets possession of the ball. “Yes! Go, Theo, go!” Eddie stands again and whistles loudly through his fingers. 

And Buck… 

It’s like time slows around him for a moment. The warm afternoon sun shining on Eddie’s skin makes him look almost ethereal. His smile is blindingly bright, his pointy canines making a welcome appearance. He just looks so genuinely happy that it’s contagious, infecting Buck with a severe case of the butterflies. 

Buck never asked Eddie to help with Theo or become such an integral part of his life. But the day Buck signed the papers to foster him, Eddie showed up on his doorstep with a suitcase full of Chris’s old clothes and toys, and he really hasn’t stopped showing up since. Buck supposes he kind of did the same thing for him and Chris all those years ago, but Buck had never expected anything from Eddie in return. It’s not even like Eddie is doing any of this because he feels like he owes it to him. Maybe in the beginning, but certainly not now. Buck isn’t exactly sure when it happened, but somewhere along the way, the lives of the Buckley-Diaz clan became so intertwined that he can’t keep pretending they aren’t one family anymore. It might be the weirdest platonic co-parenting situation in existence, but they’re still very much a family unit at this point. 

Buck knows that the rest of their extended 118 family view them this way as well. They know that if Buck and Eddie aren’t at work, then they’re together at one or the other’s house. And on the rare occasion that they’re not together, they always know where the other is and are the quickest way to get in contact with them. The kids are just an extension of this, Eddie always knowing what’s going on with Theo, and Buck with Chris—They have a shared Google calendar in addition to the ones on their fridges. They’re also both the emergency contacts for each kid, a fun fact that made Maddie nearly keel over from laughter when she found out. 

Which, yeah, Buck is aware of how this all looks, alright? 

Maybe he hadn’t been for a long time, but he’s been hit across the face with it now, and it’s really, really fucking clear how they look to anyone else. The elf from the winter wonderland, an entire town in New Mexico, Maddie, Tommy, and the rest of the 118, who almost certainly view the Buckley-Diaz family as the butt of some inside joke. 

Buck is pretty sure Eddie is also aware of it by now—he has to be. Especially after New Mexico, which they still haven’t talked about outside of the actual kidnapping. Buck has never wanted to bring up the elephant in the room, because then whatever this is becomes real. If Eddie is blissfully unaware somehow, then Buck doesn’t want to spook him and make him pull away. Buck selfishly loves the little family they’ve created together, and he will be devastated if anything comes in the way of that. 

Assuming Eddie does know about how they’re perceived, he definitely isn’t doing anything to stop it. He’s the one who’s mostly to blame for it turning into this to begin with, and he seems to have no qualms about that. He looks like he’s exactly where he wants to be, and the idea that that’s true makes Buck happier than he can say. 

Chris suddenly sucks in a sharp breath, pulling Buck from his thoughts.

“Oh, shit—Theo!” Eddie shouts.

Buck looks over just in time to see Theo trip over his teammate’s foot and fall hard on the grass, skidding forward on his elbows and knees. Buck’s stomach drops when Theo gets his bearings and pushes himself up, and thankfully, his knees are covered with his socks, but his elbows aren’t so lucky, with two large scrapes and blood dripping down the backs of his arms. 

The referee pauses the game, and Buck has every instinct to run to Theo, and based on how he’s already standing from his chair, so does Eddie. 

But before they can take a step, Theo looks over at Coach Tina and shouts, “It’s okay, my Eddie will make it better!” then takes off running toward the sidelines, straight to them. 

Miraculously, Theo’s not crying—he hardly seems to be in pain at all despite how gnarly the injury looks. He just barrels straight toward Eddie with a determined set of his brow, and Buck has never seen more of himself in the kid than in this moment. 

“Eddie! Eddie, I got an ouchie! Can you fix it?” 

Eddie immediately crouches down in front of him, his brown eyes full of concern. “Oh, come here, Buddy. Are you okay?” 

Theo nods bravely, jutting his elbows out toward Eddie as blood trickles down them. “I fell down, and now they’re bleeding.”

“I see that,” Eddie says, pulling Theo closer to inspect the wounds. “It’s not too bad; we just need to clean them and put on some Band-Aids. Come sit in my chair.” 

While Eddie digs into a tote for his very extensive first aid kit—which is essentially just a slightly smaller version of his paramedic bag at work—Buck picks Theo up by the armpits and places him into the chair. 

He presses a kiss to his curls and checks him over himself, too. “Does it hurt?”

Theo shrugs. “A little. But Spider-Man is super strong, so I’m okay.”

Buck smiles fondly at him. He can’t help it, this kid is just too cute. “You’re right. You’re being so brave, just like Spider-Man.” 

Buck can feel the eyes of the entire field on them, watching as Eddie opens up his kit on the ground and kneels in front of Theo as he begins taking care of him. Buck’s stomach squirms a bit at the attention, but another more evil part of him secretly feels smug that Eddie is theirs and no one else's. This beautiful, competent, and caring paramedic is his partner in almost every sense of the word, and Theo and Chris have the best dad in the world. There's no competition. 

And, okay, Buck thinks of Eddie as Theo’s dad, too, but that thought will live quietly in his brain for the time being. 

Eddie uses some gauze to wipe up the blood from Theo’s arms, then an alcohol wipe to disinfect. Theo hisses when it burns the wound, but he still keeps a brave face—he’s Spider-Man after all. The wounds aren’t too deep, and they’ve mostly stopped bleeding by now, so Eddie adds a bit of antibiotic ointment and tops it off with two Bluey-themed Band-aids on each elbow, which Theo is delighted by. 

“What do you think?” Eddie asks him. 

Theo bends his arms a bit, testing the feel of the bandages to make sure they don’t restrict movement. Then he smiles brightly and nods. “Good, thanks, Eddie!”

Eddie chuckles and presses a kiss to Theo’s curls before ruffling them softly. “Alright, Bud, get back out there. You’re playing so well.”

Buck nods in agreement and adds, “We’re so proud of you.”

Theo slides off the chair and walks straight up to Chris, bouncing on the balls of his feet. “Chris, did you see me? I’m playing really good, and I got an ouchie, but I’m okay, because I’m just like Spider-Man, so it didn’t really hurt.” 

Theo absolutely loves Chris. He looks up to him like a big brother, and sometimes, Chris is the only person Theo will listen to if Buck or Eddie aren’t cutting it. Because if Chris is doing something, or thinks it’s cool, then it’s also cool in Theo’s eyes. And as much as Chris tries to act like an annoyed teenager most of the time, it’s obvious how much he adores Theo, too. 

Buck and Eddie watch the interaction in amusement as Chris’s eyebrows shoot up. The teen laughs and holds up his fist for Theo to bump. “Yeah, Theo, I saw you. You’re running so fast.”

Theo beams, delighted, and waves bye as he takes off back onto the field, proving just how fast he can be. The audience watching all of this go down, all suddenly erupts into cheers, and Theo turns to wave to all of them as well, thriving from the attention. He’s definitely Buck’s kid, alright. 

Eddie shakes his head fondly and packs up the first aid kit before returning to his seat, and the game resumes shortly after. 

It goes on for a while longer, a few of the kids scoring goals, and one getting hit in the face with the ball and bursting into tears, resulting in another pause of the game. Then finally, they get to half time, and both teams return to their benches for drinks and snacks. Buck’s body relaxes for the first time all game, and he slumps back into his seat, closing his eyes as he tilts his head back up into the sun. 

But that lack of tension only lasts for a moment before two shadows come into view. 

“Hey, Buck, how are you?” 

Buck sits up, slipping into his friendly mask as he sees two of the other parents from the team standing in front of them: Jared and his husband, Matt. “Oh, hey, guys. Doing good, how are you?” He greets them, shaking their hands. 

He’s talked with Jared and Matt a bit at the first few practices. Jared’s a middle school teacher with dark skin and frankly gorgeous naturally green eyes, and Matt is a marine biologist with a man bun and winged eyeliner game that would make Maddie incredibly jealous. They’re both very nice, but Buck learned fairly quickly that they love gossip. Especially the gay kind.

“Good,” they say, both of their eyes flicking over to Eddie as they grin knowingly. Then Jared, the nosey bastard, adds, “You didn’t tell us you had a partner.”

Fuck. 

Oh, no. No, no, no, no. 

This is exactly what Buck had been worried about happening. He had hoped with everything in him that no one would say anything like this to them, especially not with Eddie around to hear it. He doesn’t want to make things awkward. He doesn’t want to pop this perfect bubble they’ve created around themselves and their family. 

Buck is too stunned to speak. He can’t even seem to make his lungs work, let alone his mouth. He needs to say something. He needs to correct them. Because Eddie isn’t his partner. Maybe he once was at work, but those days are gone, and that’s not what they mean in this case anyway. 

But before Buck can find the words, Eddie offers his hand. “I’m Eddie, nice to meet you.” 

And—What?

Buck snaps his head toward him, but Eddie just smiles and shakes the other men’s hands like nothing is amiss. 

“Likewise. I’m Jared, and this is my husband, Matt.”

Eddie points over to Chris, who’s observing the interaction with a surprised grin. “This is our son, Chris.” 

Our—Our son? 

Buck blue screens. Like truly almost blacks out from the amount of emotions coursing through him right now. 

Why the fuck would Eddie not correct them? Why would he say that?

“Oh my gosh, you have another kid, too?” Jared says excitedly. 

Buck blinks, his tongue still a lump in his mouth. “Uh—”

“Mhmm. Chris, nice to meet you,” the teen says easily, patting Buck on the shoulder. 

Jesus, Buck might actually start crying. 

“Which kiddo is yours?” Eddie asks them. 

Matt points to the bench on the other side of the field with a laugh. “Our little Olivia is the one with the brown curly pigtails, off in her own world making flower crowns.”

Eddie chuckles. “Cute. How’s she liking soccer?” 

Jared shrugs. “We’ll be sticking with the rest of the season, but we’re figuring out that art and dance classes will probably be in her future.” 

“Hey, it’s not for everyone,” Eddie says. “That’s one of the fun parts of this age. Just trying to learn and keep up with their interests.” He glances at Chris. “But honestly, that never really stops.” 

“That’s true,” Jared says, then gestures out toward where Theo is sucking on an applesauce pouch on the bench. “Theo, on the other hand, really seems to be enjoying it.”

“Oh, yeah. He loves it.”  Eddie replies with a laugh, then wraps an arm around Buck’s shoulders, and it takes everything in Buck not to visibly react to the gesture despite the way his heart pounds against his ribs. “He inherited his energy from this one, so it’s been really good for him so far.”

“Are you a doctor or something?” Matt asks. “You seemed like you knew what you were doing, patching him up earlier.”

“I’m a paramedic and firefighter. Buck and I work together.”

“Oh wow, that explains so much. You two must really like each other,” Jared says, then pats Matt on the arm. “I love this man, but I think I’d lose my mind if I had to work with his neurotic ass every day.” Matt huffs and swats him back playfully, while Jared just smiles at his husband like he’s hung the moon and the stars. Buck would find the whole thing sweet if he weren’t currently trying not to pass out. 

And if things couldn’t get any worse, Eddie squeezes his arm tighter around Buck’s shoulders and says, “Yeah, we’ve tried working apart a couple times over the years, but it never really turns out well. We’re always better together.”

Hit after hit after hit, straight to Buck’s chest. He’s dying. Bleeding out right here in this damn camping chair. 

“That’s sweet,” Matt says. 

Jared smiles softly in agreement, then as the conversation slowly fades out, he gestures toward the concession stand and asks, “Well, we’re gonna go grab some shitty nachos from concessions…You guys want us to get you anything?” 

Eddie quickly waves them off. “Oh, no, we’re all good here, thank you. It was nice meeting you, though. See you around.” 

“See you later,” they say, and head off in the other direction. 

“They were nice.” Eddie sighs contentedly, leaning back in his chair. To Buck’s horror, confusion, and maybe just a little bit of delight, Eddie doesn’t remove his arm from around him. 

And Buck still can’t fucking breathe. His face is on fire, and his mind is spinning a million miles an hour. What the hell just happened?

Eventually, Chris clears his throat and stands, glancing between Buck and Eddie with an amused glint in his eyes as he says, “I’m going to the bathroom.” He then looks directly at Buck and adds, “I’ll probably be a while.” 

“Alright, you know where it is?” Eddie asks, oblivious to the silent conversation going on.

“I’ll find it,” Chris says, smirking at Buck, then grabs his crutches and walks away. 

Again, what the hell just happened?

It’s quiet for a moment as Buck tries to control his racing heart and make his lungs work. Eddie glances at him and frowns at whatever expression he sees on Buck’s face. “You okay?”

Buck inhales and exhales slowly. “Eddie, I’m—I’m sorry.”

Eddie looks completely caught off guard by this statement. Welcome to the club. “What? What for?”

Buck shifts forward to rest his elbows on his knees, unable to bear Eddie’s arm around him anymore. This backfires when his arm falls and comes to rest on Buck’s lower back. Eddie makes no attempt to remove it. 

Buck had been terrified that anyone assuming they were together would make things weird between them. He feels like a fraud for not telling Eddie beforehand about this league and the potential of that happening. But as Eddie’s fingers squeeze around the meaty part of Buck’s waist, sending warmth shooting up his side, Buck feels himself relax just the tiniest bit. It gives him the courage to continue.

“I should’ve corrected them,” he says, looking down at his fingers where he’s picking at the skin on his thumb. “It just—I just froze up. But I should’ve said something. I will go say something.” Buck starts to stand, but Eddie’s arm tightens around him, anchoring him down. 

“Buck, hang on,” he says, his frown evident in his voice. “You do realize I could’ve just as easily corrected them myself, right?”

Buck shrugs. “I just feel bad, because I knew this might happen. Hen and Karen are the ones who recommended this league, because it’s mainly for queer families. I should’ve warned you that people might assume.”

At that, Eddie lets out a loud, disbelieving laugh, startling Buck enough to snap his gaze toward him. “Bud, I already knew that. Do you really think I haven’t done my research on the entire league, and the rules, and everything?” He asks, tilting his head with an amused smile. “Trust me, if I wanted to correct them, I would’ve.” 

Oh? 

Buck’s mouth opens and closes a few times as he’s once again left speechless. “But you…didn’t want to?”

Eddie shakes his head and shrugs. “I mean—It’s not like any of it was a lie. They asked if I was your partner.”

“Eddie—You know how they meant it.” 

He pauses for a moment, looking out toward the field at Theo, then shrugs again. “Yeah, but they still weren’t really…wrong.” 

Buck sits up straighter, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion. “Uh—Yes, they were? We’re not together like that.” 

It’s quiet again, and the silence stretches for a moment too long. 

“Eddie, we’re not,” Buck repeats, voice growing a bit frantic. “We’re not.” He’s not sure who he’s trying to convince more, himself or Eddie. 

Eventually, Eddie wipes a hand over his face and says, “Honestly, Buck, I feel like the line between us being together like that and not has gotten really blurry, don’t you?”

Buck sucks in a breath. It feels like someone’s just poured ice water over his head, and his muscles have temporarily frozen up. This cannot be real life. Eddie can’t have just said that. He can’t mean it as it sounds. “I—What are you—”

Eddie suddenly looks nervous, biting at his bottom lip as he fidgets with the hem of Buck’s shirt. “It’s nice, right? The four of us…together. I—I like the idea of us being a family.”

Buck thinks he might be having a stroke. “Yeah—Of course, it is. I like it, too. But we can still be that without, you know…us. That’s not like…a requirement to be a family.” 

“No, I know that,” Eddie says, then tentatively meets Buck’s eyes. “But is that something you would want?”

“You—You mean—You’re asking if I would want you and me to be an us? Like together? Romantically?” Buck cannot believe these words just left his mouth. He can’t believe they’re even having this conversation at all. 

Eddie nods, and something in his eyes looks so nervous, like he’s scared to hear Buck’s answer. If Buck didn’t know any better, he’d think Eddie is worried Buck doesn’t want that, and—

“Wait,” Buck breathes out, his mouth and brain on autopilot at this point. “Do you?”

Eddie swallows, and Buck’s eyes catch on the movement of his Adam’s apple. His fingers absently flex against Buck’s waist as he considers his answer. Then finally, he exhales softly and says, “These last several months have been the happiest I’ve ever been. We somehow became this perfect little family without even realizing it, and a few years back, that would’ve scared the absolute shit out of me. It did. You remember when I started having panic attacks when I was with Ana. But I eventually realized that it wasn’t the idea of a family that freaked me out so much…it was who I was making it with.

“It’s always been so easy with you, you know? Even when it was just us and Chris. I would always have these thoughts like, ‘Man, I wish I could just find someone that it was this easy to do this with.’ I don’t know why it took me so damn long to realize that I could just do it with you.

“So yeah,” Eddie continues, laughing a bit wistfully. “I really do want that. I want everything with you, Buck.” 

Buck’s ears are ringing so loudly, you’d think someone shot a gun right next to his head. Maybe they did. Buck wouldn’t really know either way because he’s not currently in his body. He’s floating somewhere outside of it, looking down at them in utter shock. 

This is everything he’s ever wanted but never thought he’d get. He accepted that he was doomed to a lifetime of close but not quite, and now he’s just learned that he’s not doomed after all on a random Saturday morning at a 5U soccer game. He doesn’t know how to even begin to comprehend the axial shift that’s just occurred in his brain. 

“You okay there, Bud?” Eddie asks after an unknown amount of silence. 

Buck is staring off somewhere in the distance, unfocused as the hand Eddie has wrapped around his waist comes up to the back of his neck, kneading gently at the muscle. It’s soothing enough that Buck slowly starts to return to his body, finally in first person in his own mind again. 

He blinks a few times, meeting Eddie’s sincere gaze, and croaks out. “Yeah—Sorry, my brain is just reconsidering everything I thought I knew about you, because I thought you were straight.”

Eddie glances away, then back again, his lips twitching up at the corners as his fingers curl around the hairs at the base of Buck’s neck. “I don’t think it’s very straight of me to feel the way I do about you.” 

And, oh.

Oh. 

Warmth pools in his stomach, as well as his throat and behind his eyes, and before he knows it, a few tears spill out, followed by a choked sob. Buck falls into Eddie’s chest as he wraps him in his arms and holds him tight, running his fingers soothingly through his curls. 

“Oh my god,” Buck gasps, unable to stop the overjoyed smile on his face currently buried against Eddie’s shirt. His entire body is shaking with adrenaline, but at the same time, it feels like a massive weight that he hadn’t realized was there has just been lifted off of his chest. Maybe that’s why he can’t help it as his words spill out of him. “Fuck, I love you so much.” 

Buck should probably be more terrified of what he just admitted out loud. Words that he never thought would exist outside of the context of his own mind. But he mostly just feels at peace. Especially when Eddie’s breath stutters and a sound comes out of him that Buck isn’t sure he’s ever heard in their nine years of friendship. Eddie Diaz giggles. Actually fucking giggles. Like a kid in middle school who just got asked out by their crush, giggles. It’s kind of the best thing Buck has ever heard in his life. 

“Yeah?” Eddie asks, amazed. 

Buck just nods. “Yes, oh my god, yes.” 

Eddie laughs again, hugging Buck’s head tighter against him, and presses a kiss to his temple. “I love you, too.” 

And isn’t that something?

Buck lifts his head, and Eddie’s hands naturally come up to cup his cheeks, his brown eyes also glassy and his dimples on full display. He wipes the wetness from Buck’s face with his thumbs, and is looking at him with such fondness, Buck feels like he’s going to melt into a puddle. 

“How long?” Eddie asks him. “How long have you loved me?”

Buck’s hands find Eddie’s wrists, and he laughs wetly. “God, consciously…since you moved to El Paso, I think. But I’m pretty sure I’ve been in love with you for years.” 

Fuck, it feels so good to finally admit that out loud. 

Eddie’s face falls a little. “That long? Jesus, Buck. I’m sorry it took me so long to figure it out.” 

“It’s okay,” Buck whispers. “We’re here now.” 

Eddie smiles softly, his eyes tracking over Buck’s face. “Yeah. We are.” Then he kisses him. 

It’s gentle and chaste, and doesn’t last nearly long enough, but it’s so, so perfect. Warm and full of all the love that Buck never thought he would have. 

When they separate, Eddie presses one more kiss to the birthmark above Buck’s eye, then pulls him back into his side. Buck rests his head on Eddie’s shoulder as his arm returns to Buck’s waist, tracing patterns against the smooth skin beneath his shirt. 

Chris appears barely a moment later, plopping back down into his chair with a laugh and mumbling a soft, “Finally,” just loud enough for Buck to hear. 

Buck rolls his eyes at him, knowing he’s not just talking about his journey from the bathroom, but reaches out and squeezes his hand anyway. 

The game resumes shortly after, and the second half is just as, if not more, chaotic than the first. A few of the kids have decided they’re done playing for the day and are huddled around a dirt pile they’ve made at the end of their bench. One little boy gets mad that another boy stole the ball from him and pushes him over in retaliation, which results in an argument between their respective parents. After this is resolved, however, the game continues much more smoothly. 

Theo hasn’t left the field once, really finding his rhythm and growing in his understanding of the game. Buck has never seen him focus on one thing for this long before, and it makes him happy that they seem to have found Theo a good outlet that he enjoys on their first try. 

Buck continues to watch with a very full heart. He’s still pressed against Eddie’s side, relishing the fact that he gets to do this now. He gets to touch and hold and exist in Eddie’s space in a way he’s never had the opportunity to before. He doesn’t have to hold back, so he doesn’t. He takes Eddie’s hand and threads their fingers together in his lap, brushing his thumb absently across his knuckles. 

Eddie glances at him, eyes crinkling softly as he smiles. “What’re you thinking about?”

Buck lifts his head just enough to kiss Eddie’s shoulder, then rests it back down. “Nothing. I’m just happy.”

Eddie squeezes him and rests his cheek on top of his curls. “Me too.”

With just thirty seconds left on the clock, Buck realizes that Theo has yet to score a goal. He’s not sure how Theo will react to this afterward—even if Buck plans on getting him a cat anyway—but it will be a good lesson in sportsmanship regardless. 

But it seems Theo has other plans. 

Fifteen seconds to go, Theo gets a determined look in his eyes, turns, and sprints in the direction of the little girl on the Lions who is currently in possession of the ball. Then, just as she’s about to kick it toward her goal, Theo swoops in, picking up the ball with both hands and taking off down the field at full speed. 

Buck and Eddie launch up out of their seats, along with the rest of the crowd, everyone cheering and laughing fondly as Theo completely ignores the ref’s whistle and Coach Tina’s shouts to use his feet. He makes it all the way down to the other goal with five seconds left, then launches the ball straight into the net. 

“Yes!” Buck shouts, nearly crying with laughter. 

“Oh my god,” Eddie wheezes. “That is so your kid.”

Buck knocks his hip into Eddie’s. “He’s our kid.” 

Theo jumps up and down excitedly as the buzzer sounds and the crowd cheers him on, absolutely loving the attention. Buck is so proud and filled with so much love for him that he might just explode with it. 

The love he feels isn’t only for Theo; it’s for the two boys beside him as well. It’s for the way they’ve shown up in his life and never left. It’s for the family they’ve built together without knowing it. It’s for the love they show him in return. Buck feels like the luckiest guy in the world. 

He was wrong once again about how life couldn’t possibly get better. Because this is it. This is the happiest Buck has ever been. 

So when Theo finally bounds over to them excitedly and says, “I get a kitty now!” Buck can do nothing but smile. 

They didn’t just find love and a family; they made it, and pretty soon, with one furry new addition.