Archive of Our Own

Nakamura always thought the summer weather suited Hirose best.

The way his chestnut locks brush through the wind, pushing his hair this way and that so he could run his hands through the silky strands to correct it. The way his sun-kissed skin seems to shine during golden hour. The way his entire body relaxes, features softening as he leans against rusty railings to breathe in the salty-air of the ocean side. 

And as he directs that smile—that perfect smile—over to Nakamura, he finds that he loves the way Hirose’s eyes seem to sparkle against the sea’s reflection. It makes him believe, just for a second, that his look of adoration is directed not at the view, but the boy in front of him.

Like this moment was made for the two of them to preserve. A moment for the two of them to cherish.

So as Hirose parts his lips to speak, Nakamura can’t find it in himself to overthink what Hirose might say. Because somewhere deep down, he knows just what he’ll say.

“...mura…” Hirose starts to speak, but a voice looms over his, seeping into Nakamura’s thoughts. His mouth continues to move, but the sound is drowned out by an overwhelming…

“Nakamura!”

With a jolt, Nakamura finally lifts his head from his desk, taking in his surroundings. A soft, warm glow to the room. Still air. Empty desks. It’s with a quiet groan and rub to his forehead that he realizes he’d been sleeping at his desk. So much for catching up on math…

A soft chuckle to his side alerts Nakamura of the other person in the room. Turning his head, his eyes lock on chestnut locks, sun-kissed skin, a soft smile, and energetic eyes.

“Hirose!” he shouts, nearly flinging himself out of his chair out of surprise. Like clockwork, a stinging heat rises to his cheeks, coloring his pale skin with embarrassment. What could he possibly be doing here this late? Being around Hirose always made Nakamura feel a buzz under his skin—like he had so much energy that could only be released through the frantic beating of his heart. He just hoped he hadn’t been snoring…

Oblivious to his panic was, of course, Hirose, who sat in the seat adjacent to Nakamura’s desk. He’d leaned back a little after Nakamura snapped out of his post-dream haze, but was still close enough to let their knees knock together.

“You were really knocked out,” Hirose commented, which definitely didn’t help Nakamura’s worries about snoring or sleep-talking. Not that he wasn’t prone to zoning out during class, but he really didn’t feel the need to spill all his secrets mid-nap. “You’re lucky Otogiri-sensei didn’t catch you!”

“I guess you’re right…” Nakamura replies with a noncommittal shrug, more concerned with the boy he’d made wait. As he voices that concern, Hirose simply shrugs it off, as if to say ‘no worries’ before hopping out of his seat.

“Sometimes it’s nice when you get to leave a little late. That way, you get to avoid a crowd, you know?” he stretches his arms above his head before grabbing his bag, slipping it over his shoulder.

“But we probably should get out of here before it gets too late. So, let’s go, Nakamura!”

As soon as the boys slipped on their outside shoes, Hirose took off for the school gates. Nakamura caught up right as he let out a large sigh, weeks of tension melting off his shoulders like a mid-summer popsicle. Propping his hands behind his head, Hirose lets an easy smile turn his lips as he glances over at Nakamura.

“Finally! Summer break.” he hums in response, slowing his stride to match Hirose’s. Looking up, Nakamura could see the sky beginning its gradual shift from blue, to a streaky pink and orange sunset. The breeze provided a nice chill to an otherwise unbearable heat, making for a rather relaxing walk. It seemed that Hirose thought so too, if his expression was anything to go off.

As they spent more time together during their second year of high school, Nakamura began to notice more and more little details about Hirose: he’s pretty mischievous, sometimes playing small pranks on his friends (and occasionally even Nakamura, to his delight!) he gets a super serious look on his face whenever he’s processing something, and he’s…rather bad at Japanese literature. 

But one of the things that stood out most to Nakamura was his smile. The real deal included his whole face: crinkled eyes, lifted cheeks, a wide grin. The one he wore habitually only has his mouth, like he wanted to put in the effort, but didn’t know how to perfect it.

The smile Hirose wore now wasn’t that, per se, but a little more sheepish than his usual.

“I…really need a break after those exams.”

Nakamura cringes at the mention of the first-term exams. They’d been lucky enough to have Otogiri-sensei again for their second year, but his exams weren’t something to be taken lightly.

“Oh, yeah. That math exam definitely brought my average down. It was rough.” He ruminates on the experience, earning him a laugh from the boy next to him.

“At least your grade went up a bit compared to last time! No matter how much you help me, I’m hopeless when it comes to literature.” 

Ah, there’s Hirose’s smile. 

With Hirose’s expertise in math, and Nakamura’s skill in literature, the two made for a great study duo. And it only caused Nakamura a mild panic whenever Hirose leaned over to look at his notes or walk him through a problem. Progress!

Nakamura glances around, only now noticing the missing person in their group. It probably wasn’t great that it took Nakamura about a third of the walk home to realize Oomori wasn’t with them, but in his defense, he was trying! The more time he spent with Oomori, the less the boy thought of the other as a threat to his friendship with Hirose. Sure, it was still annoying to think about the concert Oomori got to see with Hirose, or the times he got to visit Hirose’s house, or the memories he made with Hirose back in grade school that Nakamura couldn’t keep up with—

“Where’s Oomori?” He asks, if only to interrupt his own thought process from spiraling. Hirose just looks around, like he hadn’t thought about the other boy’s absence (much to Nakamura’s relief. Sorry Oomori.)

“Oh, right! He had to attend a meeting for the Film and Drama club,” he says, snapping his fingers as he finds the answer. “Honestly, I thought he’d just gotten wrapped into it because of Tamura, but he’s got a real interest in cinematography and special effects! It’s pretty cool!”

“Ah, I see” Nakamura nods, tossing the idea around in his head. Tamura had definitely been…eccentric, to say the least. With how easily he and Hirose got wrapped into his performances, he wouldn’t have been surprised to find out he’d pulled some stunt to get Oomori into the club permanently. Still, it’s nice to know he has a genuine passion for what he does.

“So, ah…” Hirose starts, fiddling with the strap of his school bag. His eyes mainly stick to the path in front of them, kicking a small rock along the road and occasionally glancing at the boy next to him.

“Do you have any plans for the summer?”

Summer plans? Honestly, Nakamura planned to spend his summer searching bookstores for new BLs to read and ranting to Icchan about whatever pops into his mind that day. Those weren’t exactly plans though, and definitely not ones he felt the need to voice.

“N-not really, no. My family might go out to eat if we’re all free,” is what he says instead because it felt slightly less loser-ish. “You?”

“Hm, my sister will probably drag me around to run errands,” Hirose groans, though his tone remains lighthearted. “I know Takeuchi wants to visit the beach, so we’ll probably do that at some point…but, I was also thinking about…uh…ah!”

Hirose cuts himself off, his eyes suddenly lighting up and a relieved smile making its way onto his face. Before Nakamura could question what Hirose was about to say, he widened his stride, speeding up a bit as he turned back to look at Nakamura over his shoulder.

“Do you want something to drink? The summer heat is no joke!”

Looking ahead, he spots a vending machine off on the side of the road. It held the usual options like water, juice, tea, and coffee and was stationed next to a bench so people could chat or cool off. Top quality stuff right here!

Hirose grabs a juice from the machine, then steps aside so Nakamura could get himself a drink. He wasn’t particularly thirsty, but he wasn’t about to say no to the possibility of drawing out their walk home.

But as soon as he selects his beverage of choice, he hears a huff of laughter from behind him. Turning around, Nakamura spots Hirose with a smug look on his face.

“W-what?”

“I knew you were going to pick coffee!” Hirose comments, his tone almost…teasing.

To that, Nakamura questions “What’s wrong with coffee?” The other just laughs it off, moving past Nakamura to sit down on the bench.

“Nothing! It’s just that you always pick coffee. Even in this kind of weather.”

…Did he really?

Well. Coffee’s practical! And it’s easier if he knows what he’s going to drink before being presented with a ton of options. He says as much to Hirose as he sits down, drawing more small giggles out of him.

Nakamura can’t find it in him to be annoyed.

“Like I was saying earlier,” Hirose starts, cutting through the comfortable silence. His hazelnut eyes were focused on the can in his hands, though he seemed more occupied fiddling with its cap than actually drinking its contents. “This summer should be pretty fun, but I think what I’m most excited for is Aquapet’s upcoming album.”

Finally, something Nakamura could grasp onto! He couldn’t exactly relate on summer plans, but he did know about Aquapets. After he learned Hirose was into them back in their first year, Nakamura spent an embarrassingly long amount of time going through their discography. 

“That’s exciting. Their last album was pretty good.”

“I know right?! I wanna listen to it as soon as it comes out! The thing is…it comes out at midnight, and I cannot stay up that long. I barely manage on New Years.”

“So…” Hirose suddenly turns to Nakamura, his usual smile etched onto his face. His eyes seemed to sparkle under the setting sun, making Nakamura’s heart stutter and his breath catch. Or maybe that’s just because of the next thing that came out of his mouth. “Wanna sleep over?”

“...Huh?!”

---

The screen was barely visible in Nakamura’s shaky hands, but the boy had long since memorized the words on his phone. Anticipation mixed with nerves as he stood in front of a large advertisement board, the chatter of families and couples around him completely drowned out by his own racing heart.

Today was the day of his sleepover with Hirose.

How he’d managed this was beyond him—one moment he was stumbling through a reply to Hirose’s innocent, adorable request, and the next, he was back at home, looking over the details Hirose sent him through LINE.

They planned to spend the majority of the day hanging around the mall as, according to Hirose, he didn’t have much at his house in terms of entertainment. Plus, their houses were close enough for Nakamura to grab his stuff on their way back to Hirose’s house to spend the night.

Finally, Nakamura thinks can rest peacefully.

As he waits for Hirose to arrive, Nakamura runs through the preparation he’d done the previous night; He’d briefly searched the internet to see what people tend to do during sleepovers before resorting to his trusty Lovable Lunches.

In one of the more recent volumes, Taku agreed to spend the night at Mackunouchi’s house after losing track of time and sitting out for too long. But when they were getting ready to sleep, Taku realized that Mackunouchi’s fridge temperature was a lot lower than his own! With a stubborn flush on his cheeks, he cutely told Mackunouchi that he was cold, to which the boy boldly declared that they’d huddle together for warmth!

The chapter had Nakamura squealing in his room when he’d first read it, but imagining it happening in real life was a whole different story. What if Hirose pulled the same move as Taku? Or they had to share a blanket? Or Hirose fell asleep on his shoulder? Just thinking about it had him smiling to himself like a lunatic!

Of course, with the act of drowning out everyone’s voices in favor of (creepy) daydreaming came the sudden jolt of fear when two hands landed on his shoulders. His soul nearly exited his body, but a familiar, angelic voice brought him back to reality.

“Na-ka-mura!~ Found you!”

Thank goodness. A real life angel.

The two boys walk into the galleria, following with the general flow of the crowd. While the mall wasn’t as populated as it would be on holidays or special events, there were still a good number of people walking about—and for good reason; With a staggering three floors, the shopping center had enough room for almost any store you might have in mind. Plus, its proximity to Nakamura’s suburban neighborhood made it the perfect hotspot for adults and teens alike.

After a bit of aimless wandering, Hirose addresses Nakamura with a question.

“Do you shop here often?”

“Not…ah, not really. Mostly with my family.”

“Same for me! My sister likes to drag me around when there’s a sale at one of the stores she likes. ‘Always tries to dress me up like some kind of doll, too.”

Nakamura hums in understanding, his lips tilting up. Hirose had said it in an annoyed tone, but he couldn’t imagine he was as bothered as he seemed.

Finally, Hirose stops walking, and catches Nakamura’s wrist to grab his attention. He said something along the lines of liking the store they were in front of, and suggesting they go in, but Nakamura was honestly more focused on how soft Hirose’s hand was.

Why wouldn’t he have grabbed his hand?

Apparently, he managed to make some form of a positive, human-sounding sign of agreement, because the two entered the store. All around, it looked like a generic clothing department, though it leaned towards casual streetwear: sneakers, jeans, sweatshirts, and the like.

If he was honest, Nakamura would have to admit he didn’t really shop for himself all that often, and when he did, he tended to go for the basics. He couldn’t exactly wear an ‘I Love Octopuses’ shirt out and about, now could he? Still, he could see how this store appealed to Hirose, based on the times they have hung out outside of a classroom setting.

They walk around the store, looking through various racks of clothes, before Hirose holds up a shirt to get a closer look at it.

“What do you think of this?” Hirose asks, turning the shirt for Nakamura to see. It was a jersey for a team Nakamura had no knowledge on, but it looked like a good fit for Hirose, so he said exactly that.

“You think so? I might—”

“You should try it on!” Nakamura blurts out the words leaving his lips as soon as they enter his mind. In response, he receives a slightly bewildered look, which, fair. The thought of seeing Hirose dress up in different outfits was just too cute!

“Hm, I guess I should. But, you have to try something too!” Hirose quickly snaps back, reinvigorated as he looks through the racks. That familiar cheeky look graces his face, making Nakamura hesitant to argue.

“Ah, but this isn’t really my style—”

“Don’t worry, I’ll find something!”

And that, he does. After a couple minutes of searching, Hirose comes back to Nakamura with a dark t-shirt that has some illustration and text in a scratchy font—a band of some sort if he had to guess. He holds the shirt up to his torso, wondering if it even fits him. It seemed a little big…

“I don’t know what band this is, but it looked like the best fit for you! And that was the only size available…” Hirose awkwardly laughs at Nakamura’s confused expression, scratching his cheek. “Anyway! The dressing room is over there!”

Despite his doubts, they both walked over to the fitting room, taking the two empty spaces side-by-side. Nakamura makes quick work of his shirt, easily slipping on the band shirt and turning around to face the mirror. And he looked…

Stupid.

Really stupid.

The shirt was about two sizes too big, so the short-sleeves ended at his elbows and the shirt ended a third of the way down his thigh. And considering his usual choice of clothes, this shirt was completely left-field! What would he even pair it with? He couldn’t show this to Hirose! He’ll just take it off and tell him it didn’t fit. Simple.

“Nakamura, are you done? I wanna see!”

Of course. It could never be that simple.

“I am, but…it doesn’t really fit..? I’m just going to take it off.”

“What? I’m sure it’s not that bad, let me see! I won’t laugh, I promise.” Hirose pleads with Nakamura from the other side of the door.

And, well, how could Nakamura deny Hirose something as simple as that?

So, steeling his nerves, Nakamura takes a deep breath and opens the door, standing face-to-face with Hirose.

Hirose, of course, looked perfect. The blue jersey complimented his complexion and fit nicely—just loose enough to feel comfortable while exercising, but still casual enough for leisureware. It made Nakamura flush with embarrassment even more. He just barely manages to glance at Hirose’s face for a reaction.

“Ah…” Hirose hums, looking at Nakamura. His lips wobbled as he tried to keep his expression neutral, having to cover his mouth as a giggle seeped through his rather flimsy defense.

Great. He totally thought he looked stupid!

“Hirose…” Nakamura groans, defeated. That only makes Hirose laugh harder, shoulders shaking as he blurts out apologies.

“Sorry, sorry! I just didn’t expect it to be that big on you!”

His words do little to salvage Nakamura’s dignity, but he does feel his heart flip at Hirose’s genuine amusement. Damn it, Hirose!

Nakamura quickly retreats to change out of his shirt, and Hirose follows suit. After buying the jersey, Hirose apologizes once more as they walk out of the store.

The next few hours are spent similarly, with the two boys visiting random shops and looking around. While they don’t buy much (the woes of being an unemployed teenager) that doesn’t deter them from enjoying the visit. They decide to eat in the food court, then later choose to spend the rest of the afternoon relaxing.

That is, until Hirose spots the arcade and convinces Nakamura they have to check it out.

The arcade is of a moderate size, but still fairly large considering it’s inside a shopping center. Bright screens light up the dark interior, as well as LED lights that glow around the room on a color cycle. All kinds of machines take up the space in the room: claw machines, racing simulators, air hockey, and more. So while they had been hesitant to spend money earlier in the day, the two took out a bit of money to try everything out.

As time progressed, Nakamura learned one important fact: Hirose was really good at arcade games.

Air hockey, racing games, and even luck-based games seemed to come easily to him (though Nakamura had little to compare to with that last one, considering how bad his luck seemed to be at times.) The only thing Nakamura managed to best him in were the shooting games, which required a little more hand-eye coordination. All in all, where Nakamura was a bumbling klutz, Hirose was a swift wind.

At least, until they got to the claw machines.

The claw grabs hold of a plush rabbit, lifting it up by just the tip of its ear. As it lifts up, the rabbit barely rises, moving a few centimeters closer to the goal before being released back into the plushie mass.

Hirose groans, leaning his head against the cool glass. If he recalls correctly, Nakamura would say that was his…fifth attempt? And as much as he loved to see Hirose’s concentrated determination, he also didn’t want the guy to run out of money.

“Maybe…maybe I could try?” He suggests, taking a step towards the machine. Hirose turns his head to look at Nakamura, still a bit frustrated if the furrow of his brows was anything to go by, but his expression relaxes as he processes the other’s words.

“Oh, no, no! This is supposed to be…” He starts before looking down at his wallet. “But I should probably give up soon.” Hirose notes, more to himself than anything.

Finally, he steps back, regarding Nakamura with a little smile.

“Go ahead! Maybe you’ll have more success with this thing.”

Hirose’s tone wasn’t exactly the same as usual, but Nakamura decides to let it go. He looks through the glass enclosure, checking out all of the options available.

“Which one were you going for?”

“...The octopus.” Hirose sort of mumbles. He steps close to Nakamura, pointing to the plush octopus near the front of the display.

“Ah,” Nakamura, trying to ignore just how close Hirose is, inserts some money into the claw machine and begins maneuvering the claw. 

It took a bit of precision to get the right distance and position, plus having to wait for the claw to stop dangling every time he made the slightest adjustment so he could make sure it was right where it needed to be. A little tedious, sure, but once Nakamura pressed the button, the claw went straight down to fetch an octopus tentacle. Because the octopus had been partly rotated by one of Hirose’s earlier attempts, the tentacle became an easier target than its head, though it was still hard to secure. Despite that, the claw pulled the plush octopus out of the mass, easily carrying it back to the reward box and dropping it down.

“No way!” Hirose gasps, stunned. “First try?!”

Nakamura replies as he kneels down and lifts the lid to receive the plush. “Kana used to make me get her stuff from claw machines all the time. I got used to some of the tricks, I guess. Though usually, it’s not first try.”

Standing back up, Nakamura offers the octo-plush to Hirose, who hesitates to take it.

“That’s awesome. I’ve always sucked at claw machines, so I usually don’t waste my time on them. But, uh…” His eyes avert from Nakamura’s narrowing just a bit as his tone shifts. “I saw the octopus and thought you’d like it, so I figured I’d try and get it.”

What.

How could he say something like that? Didn’t he know what that did to his heart?! Nakamura looks down at the plushie, if only to distract himself from his thumping heartbeat echoing in his head. In his hands was a cute, red octopus. The simplistic design included white on the underside of the tentacles and a little smiley-face. It shook in Nakamura’s hands.

And obviously, he loved it, but even more than that…

The fact that Hirose thought to give something like this to him for no discernable reason…

“I love it! It’s so cute!” Nakamura exclaims, holding up the octopus like a trophy. Seeing Hirose’s shoulders relax, he goes to thank him.

Hirose laughs, giving Nakamura a confused look. “You don’t have to thank me. You’re the one who won it!”

“Still…I probably wouldn’t have gotten something like this for myself. I appreciate the thought.” Nakamura admits, looking down at the plush. He doesn’t see Hirose’s expression, but he hears a quiet “It’s nothing” come from the boy.

“Well…ah—” Hirose exclaims, taking Nakamura’s focus off the plushie for a moment. “We should take a picture!”

He points to a photo booth near the corner of the arcade, noting that a couple just exited. “Come on, let’s get in there before someone takes it!”

So, with little protest on Nakamura’s part, the two head off to the photo booth, taking their new octofriend with them.

---

The sun had already begun setting by the time the two left the mall, its last rays painting the sky a warm orange and pink hue. The buzzing chatter of the city quieted down into the rustle of tree leaves and cicadas. Light footsteps mark a steady beat as Hirose and Nakamura walk home, with the former detailing various plans for their sleepover and the latter occasionally chiming in.

Right as they round another corner, Hirose’s phone chirps with a notification, making him stop in his tracks. What should be a quick read, turns into heavy silence as Hirose’s eyes scan over the message numerous times. Nakamura notices the way his brows draw together, a small frown overtaking his expression.

“She can’t be serious…”

“What happened?” Nakamura asks, a bout of concern settling uncomfortably on his shoulders from Hirose’s mumbled words.

Hirose answers, but only after furiously typing on his phone.

“My sister’s friends are coming over. ‘Said she’d be hogging all the space in the living room and kitchen, so we won’t be able to do anything.”

Oh.

Oh no.

“M-maybe she could plan for another day?” He suggests, only to be met with a shake of the head.

“She just started college, so she probably wants to see her friends while they’re still in town for summer break,” Hirose takes a deep breath, regaining his bearings before he turns to Nakamura with an apologetic smile. The kind that never reached his eyes, like he could never quite perfect it.

“Sorry, Nakamura! Looks like we’ll have to listen to that album some other time, huh?”

The weight on his shoulders grew heavier.

Was it really over just like that?

They hadn’t even gotten to Hirose’s house yet.

What was Hirose like at home? Does his room reflect his interests? What about his games, his shows, his manga? What kind of food does he like to make? What was he like when he could fully be himself?

All things considered, Nakamura supposes he doesn’t have to know. Friends don’t need to know each others’ preferred drink or room temperature. Friends don’t need to know each others’ little quirks and habits. Friends don’t need to know what makes them smile the widest, or laugh the hardest, or feel comfortable enough to peel away layers of defenses and societal rules.

Nakamura should just be happy Hirose wants to spend time with him, no matter how little.

But still…

“Would you…like to come over to my house?”

Nakamura wanted to know.

…

“I’m home!”

Hirose kicks off his shoes, lining them up at the entrance. Timidly, Nakamura does the same, looking around at his surroundings.

Hirose had been caught off guard by Nakamura’s exclamation (to be fair, he even surprised himself with his volume) but accepted his offer. Honestly, Nakamura probably should have consulted his mom before inviting Hirose over, but it was the heat of the moment! He didn’t have any other choice!

He’d just have to hope his mom’s okay with it. She will be!

Probably.

But that was a problem for future Nakamura! Currently, he was at Hirose’s house, picking up his belongings before heading for his place.

Hirose’s house was small, but cozy. Warm lighting made the area feel welcoming, and the smell of something sweet drifted its way throughout the area from the kitchen.

“Oh, you’re back! How was—” Hirose’s sister, Saho, peeks out from the kitchen, flour dusting her apron. Seeing the black-haired boy next to her brother, her eyes light up with recognition. “Ah, Nakamura, right? You were in Aiki’s play!”

“Uhm, that’s right.” Nakamura nods, looking down slightly as he rubs the back of his neck. He wasn’t quite as entranced as he was when he first met her at the cultural festival, but Nakamura couldn’t help but feel a bit awkward. She was just like Hirose, no matter how much he tried to deny it. What’s with this family’s genes?!

Thankfully, Hirose saves him before he can drown further in the Hirose family charm. 

“We’re just dropping by to get my stuff. I’m going to spend the night at Nakamura’s house,” he explains with a light shrug. Looking at Nakamura, he adds, “I’ll be right back, just stay here.”

Or not?!

Nakamura stands there, gawking at Hirose’s near betrayal until he feels a tug at his arm. And, because he can receive no mercy, it’s Hirose’s sister coaxing him into the kitchen.

He’s really in for it now, isn’t he?

Nakamura follows her into the kitchen, looking over the mess of bowls and pans covering every surface area of the countertops. At the center of the chaos were two pans, each topped with small dough balls evenly spaced apart.

After closer inspection, he realizes the second pan is only partially covered, and Saho’s goal becomes clear as she grabs some dough and begins to roll it into a small ball.

“I figure Aiki’s going to take awhile, so I don’t want to get bored. Plus, my friends are coming over soon, and these should’ve been in the oven about 15 minutes ago!”

“Ah, I see…” He begins working, scooping up a small portion of dough from the bowl and rolling it around in his hands. He knew he wasn’t exactly a master chef, but he should at least be able to manage this much. Plus, he kinda felt like he was in a mock-hostage situation, even if Hirose’s sister had a sweet smile on his face, so he didn’t really have a choice.

The two work in silence for a bit, and the rhythmic motion of preparing cookies sets his mind at ease for a bit. His dough balls were a little more wonky than hers (really, what CAN he cook?) but she didn’t seem to mind, so Nakamura didn’t let it deter his mood.

“So, what do you like about Aiki?” Hirose’s sister asks, cheery as ever.

Of course.

Nakamura glances at her, trying to decide if she really wants him to answer that question. Wasn’t it kind of embarrassing? Most people don’t just have a list of what they like about their friend! But…she looked serious.

“Well, ah, Hirose—”

“We’re both named Hirose, so you might want to be more specific!” she gently reminds him, still working on the cookies.

“R-right! Sorry. So, what I like about…Aiki” even just saying his name made his heart stutter, a weird energy making his hands sweat and his face heat up. He quickly lets go of the half-formed ball he was making. “I, uh, well…he’s nice.

“I-I think he generally goes around treating people like they matter. And because of that, he can really liven up a room with his energy. But…” Nakamura pauses, his mind clearing a bit as his words become more steady. 

“But, I think it’s best when he’s more himself. When he feels comfortable enough to make jokes or get annoyed…it feels like he trusts you enough to let you in.”

“Hm. I see.” Hirose’s sister suddenly speaks up, causing Nakamura to let out a small yelp. He totally didn’t forget she was there! She probably thought he was so creepy, going on about her brother like that…

“Ah, yeah! That’s just my take, though!” Nakamura nervously laughs, wiping his hands on a towel before getting back to work.

Beside him, Hirose’s sister glances at him with a careful expression, a light smile on her lips. “I was just wondering because I remember seeing a picture of his class trip in his room.

“In that picture, Aiki…he looked happy. Really happy. And I don’t think just anyone is able to pull that out of him,” as she set the last ball down on the pan, Saho looked at Nakamura with a look that said everything and nothing all at once.

“You must be someone really special to him, huh?”

And Nakamura…

Well, he didn’t know how to respond to that.

---

Once they got to Nakamura’s house, the two make their way up to his room (of course, not without consulting his mother about the sleepover first. Thankfully, she agreed to the idea, but was it really necessary for her to tell Hirose that she’s happy her “sweet little Okuto” finally brought friends over..? Moving on.) There, Hirose meets Icchan and Nakamura almost dies seeing his two favorite people interacting.

After dinner, Nakamura insists that Hirose shower first, to which he gratefully agrees. Really, that just gives Nakamura time to scrub his room clean of BL. He really didn’t need Hirose finding the manga he’d commissioned from Kawamura, so under the bed it goes!

Not long after he finishes up, Hirose steps out of the bathroom in a fresh set of pajamas. They quickly swap places, with Nakamura practically running off to take a shower. He could only take so much cuteness from Hirose at a time, after all, and he hit it quota!

Stepping into the shower, Nakamura allows his thoughts to seep down the drain alongside his worries. It felt amazing spending the day with Hirose, don’t get him wrong! But even so, he couldn’t help the tired breath he let out.

Nakamura reaches his hand out, watching the water run down the back of his hand and across his arm. What if he’d been able to hold Hirose’s hand? What if he’d been able to take Hirose out on a date rather than as two friends? What if he’d been able to voice the thoughts that have been plaguing his mind ever since he first saw Hirose?

What if, what if, what if.

At the end of the day, what use was there worrying about ‘what ifs?’

After getting out of the shower and changing into his pajamas, Nakamura slaps his cheeks to knock himself out of his train of thought, his warm hands leaving a red tint. Now was no time to be worrying over nothing! What would Hirose think? Pulling himself together with one last once-over (the last of many) Nakamura finally exits the bathroom and heads for his room.

But of course, it only takes a few seconds for everything to turn on its head.

“Really? He never shuts up at home. ‘Always giggling to himself like a weirdo…” His brows tighten together at that, steps halting halfway to his room. The noise was coming from his room, from a voice that sounded high and terse enough to belong to his sister. And from the sound of it, she was talking about him.

Kana.

In his room.

Talking about him.

To..?

Nakamura practically teleports to the door, swinging the door open with enough force to nearly bonk himself in the head. That was the least of his concerns, though. His eyes rapidly scan across the scene: Kana, mid-sentence, leaning against his desk with a bored expression as she converses with the wide-eyed Hirose sitting at the foot of his bed.

What did he do to deserve this?!

“What are you doing in my room?” Nakamura questions, ignoring the blazing heat rising to his cheeks. Kana flicks her gaze over to her brother, used to his odd antics.

“You were taking too long in the bath. The rest of us need it too, you know?”

“I wasn’t even—just get out!”

She merely rolls her eyes, leaving his room after thoroughly ruining his reputation with Hirose. Said boy watches the door shut behind her, then lets out a small chuckle.

“Wow, Nakamura! I didn’t know you could be so expressive.”

And that sure didn’t help with the flush on his cheeks, but Nakamura had a lot more patience when it came to Hirose. He shuffles around the room, not keeping his gaze on one thing for more than a few seconds.

“Just…ignore whatever she said. She just says stuff like that…” Nakamura stumbles through an excuse, nervously playing with his hands.

“Right…well,” If Hirose had any doubts regarding Nakamura’s statement, he didn’t express it, instead offering him a small smile. “Sit down! You don’t have to look so nervous being in your own room!”

To punctuate his claim, Hirose leans back on his hands, making himself comfortable on Nakamura’s bed. “I’m pretty beat from the mall, but we gotta stay up, so what do you think we should do?”

It was at times like this that Nakamura was reminded of what an angel Hirose is. He sits down on the edge of the bed, instantly calmed by the other’s easy-going attitude and topic change. Plus, he prepared for this! All the research he’d done on sleepover activities had not gone to waste!

“We could watch a movie? Though, I really only have horror movies…” Nakamura laments, thinking back over his collection. Really, he only had a couple of horror movies in his collection; it’s just that everything else consisted of marine life documentaries and the singular BL romance movie he’d managed to sneak into his room. So horror it is.

Hirose’s eyes widen at that, though he schools his expression into one of nonchalance.

“Ah, really? That’s—that’s fine!” 

Despite Nakamura’s clear hesitation (He really didn’t want to force the guy to watch it) Hirose only insists on watching the horror movie, so he grabs his laptop and brings it over to the bed. He holds his breath, feeling the warmth of Hirose’s skin next to his, their knees nearly touching from their proximity to one another. Nakamura wastes no time switching on a movie, needing some sort of mindless escape from the all-encompassing force that is Hirose.

The movie itself had a rather basic premise—following a group of friends as they explore an abandoned amusement park—but did an exceptional job when it came to building suspense and creating tension amongst the group. Plus, Nakamura always found it interesting to think about the technical side of things, so the movie’s special effects drew him in.

Near the middle of the film, the characters finally decided to look into the reason the amusement park was abandoned. One of them got picked to search the main office, while the others kept watch. The building was old and decrepit, making every creak in the floor boards that much louder in the otherwise silent, dark room.

Just as the protagonist heard a shuffle from the corner of the room, Nakamura felt a strong grip on his hand. He almost yelps, but manages to keep his surprise inside.

Right…With how quiet he’s been, Nakamura had almost forgotten Hirose was here.

He cautiously looks away from the screen, discreetly glancing at Hirose.

Despite the boy’s many protests, Hirose was clearly not good with horror; His shoulders tensed with each move the protagonist made, and his breathing refused to even out.

At the sight, Nakamura’s brain races a mile a minute.

What was he doing?! How could he possibly suggest a horror movie knowing what Hirose’s reaction would be? Hirose got so scared, he ended up holding his hand.

Wait.

Nakamura looks down, noting the hand firmly gripping his own. Sun-kissed skin; A soft, small palm; Warm against his own, limp hand.

Hirose was holding his hand.

Aiki Hirose was holding his hand.

Suddenly, Nakamura began to wish the movie would never end.

As the sole survivor in the group drives away from the abandoned park, the movie fades to black.

The credits roll and Nakamura feels Hirose shift beside him, breaking him out of whatever trance he’d been in for the past hour.

“...That was way more intense than I thought it’d be,” Hirose speaks up first, turning to face Nakamura. He seemed a lot more relaxed now that the movie was over, though his expression still held traces of tension. “Good thing we have to stay up, ‘cause I definitely won’t be able to sleep for a while!”

In response, Nakamura only manages a small hum.

The rest of his attention focused on his hand. Hirose’s hand. It was like every nerve in his body got transferred to his palm, making every sensation feel like an electric shock. He could feel every movement of Hirose’s hand, of his fingers, no matter how miniscule. With every tense moment or jumpscare, Nakamura felt Hirose’s fingernails dig into the back of his palm, leaving faint red marks along his skin. Every squeeze of his hand let Nakamura feel the creases in his palm. Was it weird to say he never wanted to let go?

He hoped his hands weren’t too clammy.

“I, uh, I have some documentaries that might help,” he finally replies, words coming out before he can overthink it. “They’re all about sea creatures, though.”

Thankfully, Hirose doesn’t seem too bothered, if the grin on his face is anything to go by. He agrees to Nakamura’s suggestion, and the boy quickly flicks on one of his favorites.

Of course, that meant Hirose didn't have to keep holding his hand.

Which is fine.

Nakamura had already accepted the fact that it was temporary. Hirose was scared, so he needed someone to cling on to. He should be happy that it lasted as long as it did, let alone that it happened at all. He’ll be grateful for what’s happened so far, sit back, and enjoy watching the film he’d memorized by heart with Hirose.

That’s all he needs.

…

But when a light weight leans against his side, 

When a head of pale brown hair tickles his neck, 

When a soft, warm breath grazes his shoulder,

Nakamura realizes Hirose didn’t let go.

“Oh, what’s that?”

Nakamura stares holes into the top of Hirose’s head, still resting on his shoulder (!!!) before looking back at the screen to see a glowing squid traverse through the water.

“Ah, that’s a vampire squid…”

“A vampire squid?”

Nakamura nods.

“They’re called vampires because of how their arms are connected by webbing, see?” He uses his free hand to point, still half focused and half freaking out. He just had to hope Hirose couldn’t hear the banging of his heart against his rib cage.

Hirose lets out an “oh” sound, which he takes as a sign to keep going. Anything to keep his mind at bay.

“Although they’re called squids, they actually have more in common with octopuses, genetics wise. But because they don’t quite match octopuses either, they were given their own family tree.”

As they go on, with Hirose pointing out little details and Nakamura ranting on about this and that, he finds himself relaxing more and more. Nakamura could stop hesitating and cutting himself off when an explanation got too long. Hirose could express his interest freely.

And their hands could remain locked together without the questioning gaze of others or the pretense of a movie.

---

After the second documentary ended and a couple leisurely conversations were had, midnight struck. Immediately, Hirose pulled out his phone and motioned for Nakamura to get closer. Stationing the phone between the two of them on the bed, he played the new Aquapet album, letting the music flow through the room.

About halfway through the album, they hit a mostly instrumental track. The electronic beat highlights the buzzing synths, shooting vibrations under Nakamura’s skin. It was a wildly different feel from his usual playlist, but not entirely unpleasant. Oddly enough, he felt like he could fall asleep like this, though that could just be because of the late hour.

“I’m glad we got to do this.” Stirring him from his half-conscious daze, Hirose starts to speak. He was mere inches away, his shoulder nearly touching Nakamura’s as the two lay face-down on the bed. 

Right…Nakamura had almost forgotten how close they’d gotten. They didn’t want to disturb anyone sleeping, so the music had to stay at a low volume, hence why they huddled together to listen. At first, it felt electric being so close to Hirose, like a high he could never come down from. Now, though, it’d settled to a low hum, comfortable and warm.

“The sleepover, yeah, but the whole day was great.” Hirose continues on, his eyes locked on the octopus plush he’d meant to win earlier that day. Nakamura just watches, watches as the boy seems to juggle his thoughts around as he plays with its tentacles. Eventually, he manages to string together the words he wants to say. Hirose begins to speak, his voice much softer than usual. 

“I, ah…I mentioned how my sister likes to take me shopping earlier. I know I made it sound like an annoyance, but I actually enjoy it.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” He squeezes the octoplush, seemingly readying himself to say more. Nakamura had only seen this look on Hirose a couple times before; a sense of apprehension, of tension. Like he didn’t feel comfortable in his own skin. It didn’t take long for Nakamura to decide it was his least favorite look on Hirose.

“It’s fun, you know? Going to shops and trying stuff on. And whenever you find something you like, you get to show it off.

“I don’t know,” Hirose starts to backtrack, biting the inside of his cheek. “Takeuchi says it’s girly, so whenever we hang out, we usually go to the arcade or something.”

Nakamura hesitates, racking his brain for something to say that isn’t about Takeuchi, because he sure didn’t have anything good to say about him. So instead, he goes with the slightly idiotic answer of “I don’t think that’s something to be ashamed of. I mean…you need clothes to wear, right?”

Scratch that, super idiotic.

Luckily, that seems to work well enough on Hirose, who laughs at Nakamura’s simple response. He covers his mouth to muffle the sound, not wanting to disturb the rest of the house. Nakamura wishes he could pull his hand away.

He finally turns his head to look at the other, a certain weight lifted from his shoulders.

“I guess that’s one way to look at it!”

In response, all he can do is laugh awkwardly, turning his head to distract from the burning of his neck.

“Well, anyway…I feel like I’m always complaining to you about Takeuchi, but I don’t want to give you the wrong impression! He’s really not a bad guy, just…” Once again, Hirose struggles to find his words, but at least this time he doesn’t look so distressed about it. He absent-mindedly drums on the plushie to the rhythm of the new track streaming from his phone, which seems to help. “He actually introduced me to Aquapet. Kind of, anyway.”

“Huh?” That was a new one. Not to say that Nakamura’s opinion on Takeuchi would change anytime soon, but it was interesting to hear he’d affected Hirose enough to give him a favorite band.

The other’s expression suddenly softens like he was recalling a memory. He rests his head on his hand, a thoughtful expression overtaking his features as he recounts his experience.

“I mean, he didn’t introduce me to them specifically. It’s just that in junior high, I was having a bit of trouble relating to my classmates. I don’t have much in terms of personality, so…” Hirose barrels on before Nakamura’s able to protest, the words coming out like fact. “He told me about some of the popular artists streaming at the time. ‘Figured that would help give me something to talk about.

“In the end, I ended up becoming a super big fan of Aquapet. They were one of the only bands that didn’t sing about girls and romance and such, so I found it a little easier to relate. At this point, I’m a bigger fan than most of our classmates, but at least it worked at the time!” he chuckles, though the sound is hollow, even to Nakamura’s ears.

“I think…” Nakamura starts, his voice low and hesitant. “I think I get it. I have my interests, but my main one is octopuses. I get so engrossed in them that I don’t really focus on what’s trending at the point. That’s, uhm, why I don’t have much to add in terms of conversation a lot of the time.” Jeez, he suddenly felt so embarrassed.

“But that’s not bad, Nakamura!” Hirose suddenly exclaims, breaking Nakamura out of his stupor. He leans closer, an insistent look on his face. Slightly bewildered, too, like he couldn’t believe the words coming out of Nakamura’s mouth (but shouldn’t it be the other way around?)

“You always have so many interesting facts to share, anyone would be interested in hearing them! Plus, you’re super fun to be around. The fact that you’re able to stay true to yourself—that’s pretty amazing!”

Nakamura’s eyes widen, a puzzled expression overtaking his features. Did Hirose really think that highly of him?

His brain slams a million different things to say to the front of his mind, but none of them make their way past his lips. Instead, he shakily nods his head, and the two of them go back to listening.

“So, ah, I think that’s another reason why I like being around you, Nakamura. We don’t really talk about girls or anything…” Hirose leans back after the song ends, suddenly bashful. But what reason does he have to be bashful? “But that also made me wonder…Have you ever liked any girls in our class or at school?”

Oh.

That reason.

Nakamura’s eyes widen, and he jumps back in a sudden jolt. Of course, he conveniently forgets just how small his bed is—a fact that becomes all too apparent when he feels the comforter slip from beneath him.

For a split second, there’s nothing, until the sharp pain of his back hitting the wood shoots through his spine. It takes everything in him to choke back a yell, only letting out a hiss.

Hirose quickly stumbles over to Nakamura’s side, his eyes wide with concern.

“Nakamura! Are you okay!?” He whisper-yells. Ah, right, it’s midnight and Kana will probably bust his door down if he makes too much noise.

Nakamura waits a bit, listening for the telltale sign of his sister’s footsteps barrelling down the hallway, before giving Hirose a thumbs up once he’s cleared of danger. Finally, the two get back on the bed, an awkward silence falling between the two. So embarrassing…

“N-no…” he starts, regaining Hirose’s attention from where he’s previously been messing with a loose thread in the comforter. “I’ve never…liked any of the girls at school.” Not exactly Hirose’s question, but technically true!

“Really? Not even Kawamura?” The other questions, raising a brow. And if Nakamura hadn’t been surprised before, he definitely was now. He wasn’t going to fall off the bed again, though…

“Kawamura?”

“Yeah! I mean, you guys hang out quite a bit. She’s pretty and nice, so…I figured you might be interested?” Hirose shrugs, like he wasn’t quite sure of his reasoning either. Like it was just some checklist that happened to match its requirements.

Now, it was Nakamura’s turn to be confused. Sure, he and Kawamura spent a bit of time together, but he’d never seen her as anything more than a friend (and a confidant at times.) Not long after their second year began, Kawamura confronted him with his crush on Hirose, finally making him admit it to another human being. It wasn’t exactly surprising, what with him commissioning her to draw Hirose multiple times, but still!

Point is, Nakamura had grown to know Kawamura as a good friend and the first person he’d been able to share that part of himself with. But that really is all there is to it, and Nakamura says as much.

“No, no. Kawamura and I are just friends.”

To this, Hirose just nods, a contemplative look on his face.

“I see…to be honest, I was just going based on what I’ve heard from other people. I’ve actually never had a crush on a girl before.”

His shock must’ve shown on his face, as Hirose awkwardly laughs. He shifts his position, sitting cross-legged in front of Nakamura in order to feel more comfortable recounting his experience.

“I thought I did, once. Back in junior high, there was this one girl who I thought I felt that way about. She was kind, true to herself, and always seemed to light up a room. A lot of guys liked her, so naturally, I thought I felt the same.

“But, when I became her friend, I noticed that my feelings hadn’t ever developed past that point. I was completely comfortable with the relationship we had at that point. And when I think back on it now, I think I admired her more than I liked her.”

Once Hirose had finally finished his explanation, he lets out a deep breath, and looks at Nakamura head on.

And Nakamura…

He didn’t know what to say to that.

It felt so…familiar. Trying to feel the same as his classmates, but never feeling genuine about it. Like something was missing. For him, it only began to click once he’d stopped looking at girls, and started looking at…

He shouldn’t ask. He shouldn’t. Hirose would be disgusted. He would never talk to him again. He had everything he could ever want right now, why push for more?

But still, Nakamura wanted to know.

“Have you ever felt that way…in general?”

“In general?” Hirose parrots back, his gaze curious. At this point, the album had ended, switching to some random soft beat tune—nothing like the rapid beat of his heart.

“J-just for anyone. Feelings developing past admiration or…” He trails off, swallowing the lump in his throat. What was he saying?! How could be even imply that Hirose might be-!

“I…”

Beside him, Hirose’s face blanks. A level gaze meets Nakamura’s nervous one, unrevealing none of the boy’s thoughts.

Great, he screwed it up! Nice going, Nakamura!!

But as soon as he goes to hastily apologize, Hirose’s expression changes.

At first, his eyes just widened, lips parting like he’d suddenly remembered something. But quickly, a red flush spread across his cheeks, making him turn his head away. Even then, Nakamura could see the faintest hint of red on the tip of his ear.

“A-anyone? I mean…” A wobbly smile makes its way onto Hirose’s face, no matter how much the boy tried to keep it down. “I…maybe? Have—have you?”

That expression…

He’d never seen Hirose make that kind of expression before.

Nakamura had seen plenty of versions of Hirose, from his standard kindness to his more genuine mischief, but this had to be the best one.

Wordlessly, Nakamura nods, feeling his body lean in ever closer.

“Oh? Really?” Hirose finally locks eyes with Nakamura. Nakamura had seen Hirose’s eyes plenty of times, but this had to be the best time.

“I…I think I’ve…” Hirose’s lips slowly form the words, lips parting ever so softly between each syllable. And as much as Nakamura hated to admit it, he’s stared at Hirose’s lips, at his smile, so, so many times.

But this had to be the best one.

He didn’t feel himself move closer.

He didn’t feel his eyes drift shut.

He didn’t feel himself hold his breath before finally making contact.

What he did feel was the way his nose clumsily bumped into Hirose’s; how his lips brushed against the other’s, slightly chapped, but soft nonetheless; and how Hirose's mouth widened as a small gasp drew its way out.

It was barely a second, but that was all the time he needed before a bucket of cold water splashed on his body.

Nakamura’s eyes nearly pop out of his sockets as he reels back, apologies shooting out his mouth at record-pace.

What did he just do!?

On the other side of the bed was Hirose, whose expression was nearly identical to Nakamura’s. It does, however, seem to gather his bearings faster, as he holds his hands out in front of him and says, “Nakamura, be quiet! It’s okay, really!”

He looks back and forth between the door and Nakamura, seemingly concerned with all the commotion they were making. Finally, he decides to take things by force, grabbing onto Nakamura’s shoulders. That effectively shuts him up.

“It’s okay, really!” Hirose assures Nakamura, to no avail. The boy still looked like a deer in headlights, and Hirose himself couldn’t really contain the blush heating up his face. They were really getting nowhere like this…”Ah…okay! Look—”

And before Nakamura can question it, Hirose pulls the same stunt as him. He leans in closer, pressing his lips to Nakamura’s as a short, sweet peck.

“There, we’re even! So, don’t worry about it, okay?”

Hirose just kissed him.

Hirose just kissed him.

“...Huh?”

And that’s about all Nakamura’s able to get out before the exhaustion of the entire day makes the world cut to black.

---

The next morning, Hirose gives his thanks to Nakamura’s family and departs with a cheerful farewell. Clutching his bag, he strolls down the street, the sound of chirping cicadas accompanying his light footsteps. Inside said bag was, of course, his belongings, but also the photos for the photo booth he’d visited the day prior.

It’d been fun! Visiting the mall, watching a movie, and of course, listening to the new Aquapet album!

But, Hirose’s steps slow as he continues down the events of the previous night.

Nakamura had fallen asleep nearly right after they’d…

And in the morning, the two hadn’t had time to talk much, with Hirose needing to get home.

It wasn’t like Hirose was mad at Nakamura or anything! He was being honest when he’d said he didn’t mind! But…

Hirose’s hand lifts up, his fingers brushing his lips.

‘What if he hadn’t fallen asleep..?’

Quickly snapping himself out of his daze, Hirose pulls his hand back and continues on his path home. He had places to be, after all!

But…

Maybe they could have another sleepover soon.