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Being a good best friend is all about helping your friend when they’re in need of such a thing and that’s exactly what Gavin wanted to be to Michael. So when the brunette personally came up to him on their lunch break to ask, rather politely, “Hey, wanna swing by my apartment to help me with something” Gavin couldn’t refuse. Because as stated previously he wanted to be a good best friend and not because he wanted some time with Michael. This task did however nail into his thick skull that that is all he ever will be, a good friend and nothing more.
Stepping foot into the apartment after so long had shivers of the past run down Gavin’s spine, accompanied with a giddy little chuckle of his and surprisingly Michael had let it slide-maybe because he needed Gavin? “So what did you need help with-” His sentence was cut short when he caught site of the numerous booklets laid open on the kitchen island with notable highlights over what looked to be listings. “I’m looking for an apartment for me and Lindsay,” He shrugged like this wasn’t some sort of big deal yet to Gavin it managed to constrict his breathing for that moment.
“She was tied down to a year at where she lives now and that’s about to be over with,” Michael continued as if Gavin looked confused or that his silence was even asking for more of an explanation, “And I figured instead of moving into this shit hole we could get something bigger and better plus we’re engaged…” “Oh ahaha, I see, Mi-cool!” It was for the best that Gavin piped up to stop him right then and there in his nervous ramblings. The blonde could practically feel all the giddiness and life drain from him when he just noticed how nervous and anxious Michael seemed to be about the whole ordeal-Michael felt genuinely infatuated with the red head from the office and God, if that didn’t leave Gavin envious.
“So what are we looking for?” Gavin managed to choke out successfully. At least Michael didn’t seem to notice the strangle in the Brit’s voice as he skirted over to where Gavin was currently prodding at a book or two. “Somewhere in a good location,” Michael began already picking up a few books and dividing them between himself and Gavin, “Like, with a good school nearby?”
Thankfully Gavin’s head was bowed while he was looking at the books in hand, else the brunette near him would have seen his eyes glass over and widen— ‘Gods, why did I bother…’ The blonde did know however this was no time to get upset but it wasn’t like he’d cry over this, would he? ‘That’d be stupid,’ Gavin reminded himself as he flipped through a few pages and sitting himself into a seat at the kitchen island. ‘I forgot, they probably will have kids…’ His mouth felt a dry at the thought, a cold sweat forming on his neck, ‘Normal married couples can do that sort of thing.’
Just another sick reminder that if Gavin ever did tell Michael his feelings it would never work out. There was not a single doubt in his mind it wouldn’t. Michael has always voiced some interest in having kids especially when he got together with Lindsay. And Gavin knew he could never provide that for him. ‘I’m not a woman, I can’t have kids…’
Gavin cleared his throat, hoping that whatever cruel thoughts that was in his mind would clear away as well. “Okay then,” He pushed a book toward Michael, “Then maybe Valley Town.”
Taking the book, Michael flipped through most of the pages vacantly, “I should probably tell you what I’m looking for then, huh?” And despite Gavin’s reluctance growing every passing second the blonde still managed a low ‘mhm’.
“The place has to have a somewhere for a washer and dryer.”
Michael’s own little smell won’t be just his anymore. None of the minty freshness with the hint of spice behind it will be by itself, no, it will be mingled with Lindsay’s sweet flowery scent. Gavin will miss it.
“Eh, I think one large bathroom will be fine for now.”
Gavin couldn’t help but think of the two standing at the sink together early in the morning, bumping at each other with accompanied laughter. It made him wince and twist in his seat.
“Definitely needs a bigger kitchen.”
Maybe if Gavin was lucky Michael would invite him over to sit around to have drinks and he could sit on the kitchen counter like he used to do here. ‘Michael would probably just want to be left alone with Lindsay most of the time though…’
And for a good while the brunette rattled on about particular specs he wanted, even making a few side comments about why he’s want them-sometimes saying a little too much for Gavin’s liking.
“How about this one then,” Gavin pushed over a listing, tapping at the outline of the apartment, “It’s got everything you said and all.”
For a moment Gavin thought Michael would sneer or throw his nose up
but that smile of Michael’s pulled at his lips, dimple forming as he sighed with content, “This is perfect, Gav.”
There was that smile. The twinkle in those warm brown eyes. That stupid dimple too. “Let me just go and call about it right quick…” And he shuffled off to the kitchen the book in hand.
Gavin took the time alone to run his fingers through his hair, sighing as his head bowed, “I really need to stop this stupid crush.”
“What crush?”
“Oh Go-Mi-cool!”
Michael was leaning on the counter, phone and book dangling from his hands and an expectant look over his face. ‘Shit.’
Gavin sputtered, eyes darting around, “Nothing, ignore it.”
But the roll of the others eyes said other wise as he walked forward, “So you have a crush on someone…Must be Barb.”
“God no!”
Michael stared at him for a good while before waving off Gavin with a huff. “But hey if you ever do settle down with someone…” This was beginning to hurt the blonde just by the mention of it, “I’ll help you look for an apartment, Gavvy.” Before winking and walking away tossing over his shoulder that he’d get them a drink.
Maybe staying any longer would kill Gavin completely. He knew how Michael always got a little chatty about Lindsay when he drank. But Gavin was already hurt. And he needed a drink. He needed to be near Michael. And it just all hurt.