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“If you have ever questioned how our parents ended up together,” Solenne began with a laugh—far too fond for Oryn’s liking—folding one leg over the other atop the living room sofa, “Just don’t ask Oryn, he’d give you a ridiculous retelling and blame it on fruit.”
“It was about fruit,” Oryn replied from the armchair opposite of her, not even bothering to lift his eyes from the object he was fidgeting with on his lap. “Neither of them had enough neurons in their brains to qualify as actual adults back then. Father read one dusty book and thought he just found the ultimate strategy to the art of love confessions, I do NOT care how ridiculously smitten they are for each other now.”
“You’re being unfair, Oryn.” Maleinoe said softly. “Father was trying to find ways to respect the customs of the Island of Woe, I’m sure his intentions were sincere.”
“Fufufu… Regardless,” Solenne declared, “it’s still one of my favorite stories. At the time, I recall that neither of them hadn’t confessed yet, they were hopelessly stuck on the crushing stage? Whatever, father, for all his elegance reached the point where his sheer desperation literally topped his dignity and pride. He instead buried himself in NRC’s library searching for books about the Island of Woe like there’d be some miracle solution on how to court a Shroud.”
“Come now Solenne, he wanted to honor dad’s culture BEFORE asking for his heart.” Maleinoe added in defense, but for what really?
Oryn finally looked up and stopped his fidgeting, utterly deadpan. “And what he found, was probably the single worst piece of dating advice ever. Let us go over this discreetly, shall we?”
.- .--. .--. .-.. .
The fae prince wandered back and forth through the halls of Diasomnia, looking especially troubled. His thoughts had long since developed into an argument with himself.
“To confess so openly… Would that not burden Shroud?” Malleus wondered, looking down at the floor lit up by the moonlight coming from the windows. “But, to remain silent is equally unbearable.”
Malleus’ brow furrowed ever so slightly. Idia rarely attended lectures in person and fled social gatherings just as quickly. Malleus had spend months convincing him that these habits held no significance, that perhaps he merely liked solitude as he himself often did.
—
“Wow, father really did overthink everything,” Solenne drifted over with poorly concealed amusement. “He could have just said, ‘ahh, I like you so, so, so much!!’”
—
For the following day, Malleus resumed to pacing between the bookshelves in the library. Pride urged restraint, the fae of course was not the type to throw himself carelessly at something he was unsure of.
Every passing day brought with it the uncomfortable realization that his hesitation did nothing for him except allowing the possibility of someone else reaching his beloved first.
The notion settled heavily in his chest. “Would he refuse me anyway?” The question came to mind before he could shoo it away, but the possibility that afterward, Idia would avoid him altogether and retreat behind another screen, protected by a locked door behind the walls of Ignihyde.
Malleus closed his eyes for a moment, almost frustrated by how thoroughly a mere human managed to have him think like this.
—
“That, is the part father never admits, don’t you think?” Maleinoe interrupted, “I’ve heard rumors assuming he feared nothing, but the way they told the story to us themselves was different.”
Oryn leaned back with an exaggerated sigh. “Translation, a fae prince couldn’t eat his pride to fess up and say the three words.”
—
Malleus has already exhausted an entire shelf dedicated to interpersonal etiquette, only to discover that books about human courtship, was not really a keep in the NRC library. There were books about treaties, inheritance, and social customs between kingdoms throughout history, but not a single one answered the only question occupying his thoughts; how does one tell a human that they’ve become dear to them?
Malleus shut the book he finished reading with a quiet sigh and he continued his search.
Later on, Malleus’s wandering led him to a quieter corner in the library where the collections were organized by region and not by subject. A faded brass plate with swirly letters spelling out ’The Island of Woe’ caught his attention.
If books about love were not available, perhaps books about Idia’s homeland would be more enlightening.
The fae began flipping page after page, reading about the island’s engineering traditions, mourning rituals and a variety of customs. The more he read, the more fascinated he became.
“Interesting. Even among humans, each land nurtures traditions entirely its own, much like the courts of the fae.”
Near the end of the shelf, one particularly weathered book’s pages nearly fell apart as Malleus opened it, its brittle pages talked about customs that had long since fallen out of practice, and not to mention, really old.
Halfway through the book, a short passage caught the fae’s eye.
To throw an apple at the one you cherish is to declare your affection, should it be caught, the love is accepted in equal measure.
—
“And that, is where these two think it went amazingly great, and where I found it dreadfully cringy.”
Solenne laughed so hard she nearly doubled over. Maleinoe, despite knowing what came next, quietly lowered his head into one hand.
—
“I see,” Malleus murmured. “Then, that shall be it.” Without another moments rest to even think, the fae rose up from his chair, already planning where and when his beloved was most likely to appear outside of his dorm over the coming week.
…
The following morning proved in Idia’s ‘professional’ opinion to be that the universe wants him dead by allowing this class to even exist.
P... E. Yuck.
Out of every class the founders of the glorified underworld they call school, P.E alone felt personally designed to torment people like Idia. It was a hands on, physical class, (literally in the name) there was no screen that could do push ups Idia could hide behind, no excuse convincing enough to satisfy Professor Vargas, and no corner where he could quietly disappear and reappear back in his room to.
Idia dragged his body through the locker room equally enthusiastic as one of the king of the underworld’s souls in that creepy river where dead people were kept, removing his hoodie and tossing it onto the nearest bench before staring blankly at his P.E uniform.
“Actual raid boss of a schedule…” Idia muttered quietly, pulling his shirt over his head. “Imagine forcing me, the resident shut-in to participate in this crap, this is literally dev oversight, plz patch this garbage already…”
Around him, students chatted freely, none of them acknowledged or bothered Idia really. But who cares? They were all normies, loud and extroverted NPCs running the same ol’ nagging dialogue trees!
Idia just wanted to skip through the next four hours and return to his room where his form of civilization existed in a trashy RPG he downloaded at three in the morning. The game probably had recycled assets and servers held together by a string, but that only made him want to play it even more, ANYTHING better than going out here.
“Heeheehehe, gacha game out of a dumpster-fire? Now that’s peak entertainment, hehehehe…”
Thunk!
Something struck the side of Idia’s head hard enough to make him flinch violently.
“GYAH!—“
Idia’s flames burst outward like a startled campfire that caught a gust of wind, crackling several inches higher as he spun around in alarm.
“…Wut the hell was that?!”
Idia looked around the room, expecting… actually, he didn’t know what he expected. A prank? A rogue basketball? Sum first year deciding today was THE day to grief a weirdo like him?? Well he’s innocent UNTIL proven guilty, so what is their problem?
But instead, resting against the floor near his shoes was… an apple? A perfectly ordinary and totally not suspicious apple.
Idia bent down, picking it up between two fingers, it definitely hadn’t been there a second ago. Turning it over, the engineer searched for anything. A sticky note, a crack, whatever. But nothing, just a lame apple.
Idia gaze around the room with his head low. No one was looking, if anyone noticed the apple being thrown at him, they certainly weren’t acting like it, OR they’re covering for each other!
“Right…” Idia mumbled, eyebrows knitting together. “Guess I just got randomly selected for somebody’s throw and dip prank. Cool, love that for my day.”
With no better explanation, Idia carried the apple over to the bench and shut his locker with a metallic clang before trudging after the rest of the class, leaving the apple sitting on the bench.
It remained there long after he’d forgotten about it. A certain someone however, has been watching just to see him pick it up.
Malleus stood behind the row of lockers, his emerald eyes following Idia until he disappeared through the doorway, leaving behind nothing but the abandoned apple sitting on that bench.
“Huh.” He hummed to himself in confusion, almost unable to believe what he just saw. A tiny crack formed in the confidence he built from one very convincing paragraph from an old book.
“Perhaps, I misunderstood this custom. Yet the page had seemed quite explicit,”
Throw the apple.
The other catches it.
Affection returned.
Malleus folded his arms, contemplating the matter with the utmost seriousness.
“Or, the custom is ancient. Shroud may simply be unfamiliar with it.” The conclusion settled nicely in the fae’s mind, customs changed over centuries. Surely even natives of the Island of Woe not remember every tradition by heart.
“Then, I must simply continue until he recalls its meaning.” Malleus resolved aloud with renewed determination.
Some may find Malleus’s persistence was admirable, but in the moment, it was less admirable from Idia’s perspective.
On Wednesday, Idia found another apple bouncing off his shoulder while he was quietly making his usual lonely walk back to his dorm.
Thursday’s apple struck Idia’s head and rolled around the table during board game club, even startling Azul.
Friday’s apple landed squarely beside Idia’s lunch, sending his juice box toppling over his tray.
By the fifth incident, Idia had just about enough with the mysterious fruit assaulting.
“Orthooo, I’m getting spawn-camped. Five apples in five days. FIVE. Whoever this troll is has committed to the bit harder than half the normies base commits to ranked!”
The engineer groaned dramatically upon collapsing into the chair beside his brother later that evening with another pristine apple sitting on his desk. “I can’t even optimize around it because my perception stats got dumped into engineering. Srsly, who chose this punishment for me? Maxed out my smarts, and left nothing for reflexes.”
Ortho floated beside him, resting a finger against his chin. “We could install cameras around all your in-person classes and see if we could catch them?”
“Heeheehehe, that would be what I’d do if it wasn’t against the rules. I’d rather not do the expulsion speedrun.”
“Okay… Then what if you become the bait?”
…
“Wut?”
“You walk somewhere out in the open while I monitor from afar! Whoever keeps throwing the apples will eventually appear.”
“I rlly had no plans on leaving my room tomorrow, but ywk, fine. Operation ‘Apple Watch’ begins tomorrow!”
Idia stayed committed to the plan and forced himself to stay outside after his classes ended. Instead of walking straight to his dorm through his usual secluded route, he wandered into the courtyard.
He settled down on the bench under one of the trees, shoulders hunched as he unlocked his phone and buried himself in a mobile game installed on his phone.
Every few seconds, Idia looked at the roofline of the adjacent hallway where Ortho remained carefully hidden behind the railing. His brother gave the tiniest nod each time their eyes met before Idia looked back down at his phone.
Minutes crawled by, a breeze rustled the leaves overhead and students gradually disappeared until the courtyard became comfortably quiet.
“Psh, maybe the apple junkie rage quit…” Idia mumbled, beginning to relax.
…
Thunk!
“Oof!”
Idia’s flames exploded upwards again as something struck the back of his head. The apple rolled around harmlessly into the grass.
Idia clocked his head so quickly he nearly fell off the bench, his eyes narrowed before catching the briefest flash of emerald disappearing around the corridor. A bright green ribbon fastened around someone’s upper arm vanishing behind the stone wall.
Idia looked back behind him, nearly dislocating his neck as he searched for Ortho. The android peeked over from the rooftop to flash an enthusiastic thumbs up and pointed at the built in camera in his eyes.
Idia responded with frantic gestures that made him look even weirder without context.
“You saw dat!? Green armband, that color’s reserved for Diasomnia!”
Back inside his dorm room, the room was silent except for the projector replaying Ortho’s footage across the far wall. The video showed Idia pretending to play his game, behind him crept a shadow in the hallway, standing behind one of the stone columns was a horned figure.
A moment later, the same apple sailed cleanly across the courtyard, and the horned figure stepped back just enough for the bright fabric of his uniform to catch the light before disappearing again.
Ortho paused the recording and zoomed in as far as the footage allowed. “Facial recognition complete!” He announced cheerfully. “The probability of misidentification is only zero-point-three percent, it appears that the person who has been doing this is Ma-“
“Malleus-shi?… Game ooover.”
Ortho wasn’t even able to say another word before, his brother had already collapsed face-first onto his bed, rolling around in his blanket.
“Brother?” Ortho floated closer. “What’s the matter?”
“Because that’s Malleus freaking Draconia…” came the muffled reply. “Do you realize how cooked I am? My social battery was already at an all-time-low before all this even happened??”
“Or, maybe Malleus Draconia wishes to get your attention. If he’s putting this much effort into seeing you, statistically speaking, your chances have increased significantly, you never know until you ask!”
Idia finally rolled over just for one of his golden eyes to peek from beneath his blanket. “Ortho… You’re assuming this is some kind of romance route when it could just as easily be a prank or a form of bullying.”
“Would you believe that someone as honorable as he is would do such a thing?”
.
..
…
“Nope. That’s sort of the problem.” Idia planted both hands over face with an exhausted groan. “Ever since I realized I… y’know,” the engineer waved his hand around in the air vaguely. “…liked him, I’ve totally been off my game. I can’t even hold a normal convo whenever I have to speak to him without my brain blue-screening. If I walk up to him now and ask why he’s been beaning me with apples for a week straight, I think I just might die.”
Ortho watched quietly as his brother stared at the paused image of Malleus on the wall. Minutes of endless pondering passed before Idia sat upright, determination replace at least SOME of his cowardliness.
“No, no. I need to catch him red-handed. Like, literally in the act, then I can act cool and confront him before I get to self destruct.” Idia leaned forward pointed straight at the wall where the projector was panned to the apple. “Next apple, I’m catching the final boss myself!”
The following morning was like a crappy work out montage with no upbeat music to keep Idia going. The engineer had been dragged from the bed by Ortho before sunrise under the justification that “heroes always prepare before the boss fight!”, a statement Idia disputed by reminding his brother that he was in fact neither heroic or equipped for whatever humiliation ritual awaits him in a few hours.
His complaints were ignored, and for the next few hours, Ortho turned a corner of Idia’s room into those carnival throwing games with Idia’s rolled up socks, and anything else that happened to be round.
Ortho refused to explain anything and continued launching the said objects at Idia at varying speeds while the engineer stumbled and flailed through the embarrassing drills.
—
“No, his reaction speed is still below average to this day.” Oryn said, recalling moments of relation.
“Yeah, that tracks. I asked him to catch my hair clip one time and he missed it. I really wonder if reflexes were downloadable content, dad would maybe be better at this stuff.”
…
“I doubt it…” Maleinoe and Oryn mumbled in unison.
—
By the afternoon, Idia found himself standing on the field in his P.E uniform once again. His eyes drifted instinctively until they landed on a familiar figure hovering several feet above the field. Malleus sat astride his broom, speaking with Professor Vargas before ascending higher into the air.
The sight alone was enough to make Idia’s stomach backflip, even if he couldn’t do a backflip IRL. F’s in the chat, loser.
“Stay cool…” Idia whispered while fidgeting with his jacket zipper. “He’s just my totally cool and handsome crush who’s been beaning me with produce all week. No pressure.”
The class soon scattered into Vargas’s endurance exercise, half the class did an extended run around the field while the other half practiced broom flying overhead.
Idia was already lagging behind the moment the run began, breathing harder than everyone else before barely reaching the second lap.
“Cardio...” Idia wheezed. “Actually invented… by villians..!”
Sweat clung to his forehead as he focused on remaining upright, which was why he almost missed the faint whistle slicing through the air above him. His years of bed rotting and nonexistent athletic instinct would have failed him, BUT thanks to Ortho’s hellish training and to Idia’s own disbelief, he cleanly caught the descending apple in both hands.
“I… I caught it!?” He asked himself in shock. Idia clocked his head upwards and noticed Malleus flying by.
…
“Erk...” Idia looked around them, on the field he was the only one on the opposite side. The engineer eyed the apple, then looked back up at Malleus.
“MALLEUS!”
Without even thinking, Idia hurled the apple upward with every ounce of strength he had in his noodle arms. The apple rose to a heroic five meters before gravity insisted on a hug.
Before the apple could return gravity that hug, Malleus guided his broom into a sharp dive and plucked the fruit from the air, and landed beside Idia. The fae stepped close enough for Idia and Idia alone to hear him.
“I accept.” Malleus murmured, leaning forward just enough to place a feather-light kiss against Idia’s pale cheek. “Thank you, Shroud. I’ll come find you tomorrow.”
And with that, Malleus returned to his broom and rejoined the exercise, leaving one stunned housewarden rooted to the field. The very tips of Idia’s fiery hair turned into a light shade of pink.
“What… What just happened?” Idia whispered, completely and utterly motionless. Did THE all powerful and intimidatingly handsome SSR fae prince, Malleus Draconia really just kiss a pleb like him and walk away leaving him more confused?!!??
-- .- .-.. .-.. . .. -.. .. .- / .-. ..- .-.. . --..
“See now Oryn? THAT was the best part!” Solenne insisted, bursting into uncontrollable while hitting Maleinoe’s shoulder.
Oryn stared into the distance with his shoulders trembling despite himself. “Yes, and one of the reasons why I don’t want to go home…”
Maleinoe let out a soft sigh, brushing Solenne’s Hand away. “But let’s be fair with this retelling, ‘Idia’ didn’t realize what was going on at the moment.” He glanced at his siblings before continuing. “For the next month, he assumed ‘Malleus’ had became unusually affectionate overnight.”
“Seriously? Unusually?” Solenne repeated. “Try painfully. ‘Malleus’ started showing up everywhere, talking to him and initiating conversations.”
“And he just… accepted that. I would’ve deemed it as a stalker situation.” Oryn replied flatly.
“I could hear dad’s internal thoughts, I have a gut feeling it went around the line of ‘Whoa… my five star crush is voluntarily hanging out with ME! Did I accidentally complete sum random side quest in exchange for this insane loot?!?!?’”
Solenne began mimicking Malleus’s posture, placing a hand over her chest. “‘Shroud… I had assumed, after you returned my confession, that our relationship had been established.’”
Solenne dropped her impression as quickly as she formed it. “I could imagine dad staring at him for a painfully awkward minute before asking, ‘wut confession?’”
Maleinoe smiled at Solenne’s joke, placing his hands back on his lap. “And then he’d explain the book he found, including the meaning of the fruit.”
“And dad’s response?” Solenne asked, Maleinoe shrugged and they both turned their attention to Oryn.
“Why are you two looking at me like that? How would I know?” Oryn answered. “…But if I had to say, he’d reply with something like, ‘I’m a modern dude. Why would I keep track of how a bunch of ancient fossils confessed to each other centuries ago?’”
“Fufufu~ And after they finished misunderstanding one another, I recall that a proper confession took place.”
…
“No broom dives or crappy exercise montages. But they still could’ve skipped the apple throwing part.”
“Come now Oryn, that’s what started it all.”