Chapter Text
Nakamura looked up at the bulletin board where the classes for the new school year were posted. It took him only a few seconds to find his own name:
"Okuto Nakamura - Class 3B."
Immediately, his eyes began scanning the list in search of Hirose. <<Please, let us be in the same class. I’m not asking for anything else, universe>> he pleaded internally. When he finally found it, he felt a wave of relief seeing that, luckily, they were indeed in the same class. <<YES! Thanks universe for answering my prayers!>>
Just as he was about to jump for joy, his silly smile froze as his eyes drifted downward. Right below Hirose's name, a name he had heard before stood out, making his stomach drop:
"Kousei Matsumura."
All his excitement vanished, replaced by a sudden rush of worry and fear.
<<No way... Is he in our class too? He was unbearable enough when he went to a different school; I don't even want to imagine what it'll be like now that he'll be right in the same class. I just hope he doesn't get between Hirose and me… I just don't trust that guy at all! I know I'm not one to talk, but he goes way too far… Although he acts like a saint, he's an absolute creep>> he thought, gripping his fists as he walked toward the classroom with his head down.
The hallways were full of students. Some came from other schools, and others were people he had simply never paid attention to (After all, Nakamura only had eyes for Hirose).
Everyone seemed to already have a group to belong to except for him, who always kept to himself. However, he brushed it off and made his way to the classroom door.
As soon as he stepped inside, he noticed someone waving at him enthusiastically. It was Hirose, smiling from ear to ear .
"Hey, Nakamura! I'm so glad we ended up together, aren't you?" he exclaimed, flashing one of those smiles capable of melting Nakamura's heart. "I was scared I wouldn't know anyone in class. Seeing your name on the list was a huge relief."
"Hehe, y-yeah, right? I'm really happy we're together too..." Nakamura felt his cheeks burning.
He hadn't expected Hirose to be so excited about sharing a class for another year. Even though they were already friends, Nakamura still found it hard to process just how close they had become.
But the happiness of the moment was interrupted.Out of nowhere, a tall guy stepped between them. Matsumura approached with a perfect, false smile on his face.
"Well, look at that, Nakamura. It’s great that Hirose has two of his friends with him this year, isn't it? We’re very lucky." He addressed Nakamura with a malicious glint in his eyes.
"I-I guess..." Nakamura replied in a low voice. He really didn't trust this guy. <<What is his deal? Why so nice all of a sudden, and what for? I don't buy it, he must be plotting something. I have to be careful…>>
"Oh! You two already know each other, right? I saw you talking after school once, hehe. I hope the three of us can get along!" Hirose laughed nervously. Deep down, he was a bit uncomfortable with Matsumura's presence. Despite being an old friend, he could be a bit "intense" sometimes… to the point where Hirose would occasionally fake forgetting plans just because it was so awkward to hang out. Nonetheless, he couldn't just freeze him out and leave him on his own, after all, Matsumura was new to the school and didn't have any friends other than him.
<<I just hope they get along, I don't want any trouble... especially not with Nakamura, now that we're closer than ever and I feel so comfortable around him…>>
The bell rang and a new teacher walked into the classroom. Nakamura immediately said goodbye to both of them and headed to an empty seat in the back.
The classes felt eternal.
Hirose and Matsumura seated really close to each other and Nakamura was suffocating with jealousy every time he saw Matsumura doing whatever it took to catch Hirose's attention: he "accidentally" dropped his pencils near him, asked him questions about math problems (despite supposedly being an A+ student), and even managed to sneak him a secret note! He couldn't wait for class to end so he could talk to Hirose alone, without anyone getting in the way.
Just as school ended and he was about to approach Hirose, Matsumura beat him to it. Nakamura listened closely to what he was saying to Hirose.
"Hirose, would you mind helping me with something? I need to stay and look for my locker key. I think I dropped it near the gym earlier, could you ask if someone has found it there?”
"Uh... Sure, no problem, but you've got to stop being so forgetful, okay?" Hirose exclaimed jokingly.
"Hehe, sorry. I'll wait for you outside." Right after saying goodbye, Hirose walked out the door, leaving Nakamura no chance to follow him.
That was when Matsumura's expression changed radically, staring at Nakamura with a sharp glare. A shiver ran down Nakamura's spine.
<<What does this guy want now? He's giving me the creeps just staring at me like that. Besides, what's with that look? It's like he's looking at an insect... I'd better hurry up before I'm left alone with him…>>
But it was too late. As soon as he finished packing up, they were the only two left in the classroom, and Matsumura began walking determinedly toward Nakamura.
"Nakamura. I need to talk to you."
"Uh... Can it be some other day? I'm in a hurry..."
"No. You're going to listen to what I have to say right now." He paused for a moment, giving an even more threatening look. " I really don't want any trouble with you. We both know we both like Hirose. But I. MET. HIM. FIRST. So you need to back off and leave us alone. You know he deserves to be with someone better than you; you don't even come close to my level, so for Hirose's sake and your own, know your place. Now that I'm closer to him, I won't let anyone get in the way."
Nakamura definitely hadn't expected this. Was Matsumura... threatening him?
<<No way... this guy has completely lost his mind! And who does he think he is, choosing for Hirose?! Hirose is the only one who has the right to decide about his own life! I won't let this slide. This very afternoon, I'll send him a LINE message…>>
"Or else what? You can't control Hirose, he doesn't belong to you, nor to me. He's free to do whatever he wants. You don't deserve to be his friend, and just so you know, I'm going to tell him about this so he can see what you're really like."
"Go ahead, try it," Matsumura answered defiantly, raising his voice now that the classroom was empty. "He won't believe you. If you dare try to pull him away from me, you'll pay the consequences. I really wouldn't recommend it if you don't want Hirose to hate you forever."
"You can't do anything to make Hirose stop being my friend, that's between him and me, you have nothing to do with it!" Nakamura shouted, worked up by the situation. "Leave us alone and don't you dare threaten me again!"
"Don't be an idiot and do as I say. Otherwise, don't come crying to me later." Matsumura let out a malicious short laugh and walked out, leaving Nakamura speechless.
<<W-What a complete bastard!!! I definitely have to warn Hirose about him; I can't let someone like that manipulate or hurt him. I'll text him on LINE today to tell him what just happened... If I do it in person, I risk Matsumura being there and making it look like I'm making it all up…>>
On his way home, a heavy fear gripped him.
<<Can he really do something to tear us apart? No... It can't be... Even though Hirose is pretty eager to please others, he wouldn't believe Matsumura over me, right?... I can't give up just because of a threat from some pathetic weirdo.>>
As soon as he got home, he pulled out his phone and started typing a message to Hirose. But every draft he wrote made it sound like he was lying. None of it sounded believable, and he was terrified Hirose would think he was just talking trash about his friend without even knowing him. But on the other hand, he had to do something. He didn't want Matsumura to get his way.
After fifty attempts, he finally came up with a text that convinced him:
"Hey, Hirose... Sorry to text you out of the blue like this and so seriously, but I really need to tell you something that happened today in class after you left. I know it's going to sound incredibly weird and I know Matsumura is your childhood friend, but when we were left alone, he threatened me. He told me to stay away from you and that if I kept being your friend, he'd do something to make you hate me. I know I barely know him and I don't want you to think I'm making things up, but his attitude really scared me... Please, be careful around him, he's not who he pretends to be. I'd like to give you more details alone in class."
He hit send with trembling hands. <<Please, believe me…>>
The "Read" confirmation didn't take long to appear. However, the "typing" bubbles never showed up. There was only a pure, damning silence.
Anxiety began to course through his body.
It had been years since he last felt such a horrible, suffocating pressure. It was the exact same feeling from when he was bullied in his childhood; when he just wanted to make friends and everyone treated him like a freak, lefting him out, treating him as if he wasn't "normal," as if he was sick...
Around the age of thirteen, he had started dealing with those anxiety attacks by cutting. His arm was covered in scars, which was why he always wore long sleeves or put on makeup to hide them.
Those episodes used to be frequent, until he met Hirose. Seeing him every morning gave him a reason to keep going; seeing his smile and talking to him made him feel the way no one else ever had. Hirose was his source of happiness, and that was exactly why he couldn't let anyone take him away.
Whitoyt him, he would sink straight back into the same dark pit he had fought so hard to escape... and he didn't even want to imagine how brutal a relapse would be.
He barely slept that night.
The sheer anxiety wracking his body kept holding him awake. He thought about turning back to his old coping mechanism.
<<Maybe that way, I'll calm down…>>
just as he was about to pull a box cutter from his drawer, his hands shook, and he found himself unable to do it.
<<N-no, oh my god, I don't want to go back... I just want to calm down. Everything is going to be okay... I have to be strong.>>
He put the sharp object back in the drawer and started rereading the manga Kawamura had given him. That way, he could escape reality, if only for a few moments.
….
The next morning arrived, and Nakamura felt like a total zombie by the time he reached school. He had barely slept, and Hirose still hadn't replied.
While putting his shoes into his locker, he noticed a piece of paper shaped like a letter sticking out from the grates. It was a note.
Nakamura opened it carefully and read the contents to himself.
[Nakamura, I saw your message yesterday. Let's talk in classroom 2-C after school... Come alone. - Hirose Aiki]
<<What is this? Why couldn't he just text me?... Did something happen to him that stopped him from writing back? Well, at least it looks like he hasn't completely ignored me…>>
Worried, he began looking for him everywhere, but as he walked through the school, several people stared at him.
<<What's wrong? Do I really look that awful from not sleeping?>>
He kept moving forward, ignoring the stares of the others, until he reached the classroom, where he encountered a scene that made his heart sink.
It was Matsumura, chatting with several of their classmates. The moment Nakamura walked in, Matsumura stopped talking, and everyone directed a look of pure judgement toward him.
<<W-What? What happened?... Why is everyone looking at me like that? Wait a minute, what the hell was Matsumura saying? Is he spreading rumors about me? And most importantly, where is Hirose? Class is about to start…>>
Everyone moved to their seats. Hirose arrived five minutes late, wearing a sad expression. He looked towards Nakamura with hurtful eyes before sitting at his desk, hanging his head low.
<<What's with that face? I hope nothing bad happened to him…>>