Work Text:
the ghosts.
they scream.
they scream my name, they beg for freedom,
a freedom i cannot give.
all i feel is the torture of estrangement,
pain, never-ending suffering,
thorns pricking at my side,
ghostly swords lunging through my back.
upon my brow i bare a crown of thorns
but oh, how i yearn to wear a crown of sweet, white roses instead,
placed on my mane by your warm, loving hands,
however undeserving i may be,
am i selfish of asking this from you?
i am now nought but a beast craving blood,
for i cannot sleep.
my only light is the moons waning crescent, inevitably disappearing,
for the darkness, it calls.
it beckons, the hands of shadows clutching at my heart
calling my name, tearing me apart,
but alas, even these consequences of my sins are not enough.
i believe my punishment should be much greater than this.
not even the gods can save me now.
i'm a sinner, i say,
a sinner,
an angel that fell long ago in front of the holy figures that reside above me,
yet not as graceful as a fell star.
my heart cannot ever be mended,
never able to return to its original state,
for it has been painted with grief,
like blood splattered on fresh, faerghan snow.
the fresh, unstained snow that fell,
my footsteps once light among them, once fleeting,
now replaced by the heavy strides of a man,
unfeeling, cold, frozen.
not even the heaviest storms will blow my sins away,
as they dirty my body in an unimaginable filth
unable to be cleaned, my body unable to be pure and innocent again,
as my young self once was.
my soul is parched, thirsty, hungry, void,
for some form of salvation to save me,
from this horror that i have brought upon myself.
i still hear their voices, ringing in my ears, begging me to join them,
father, stepmother, glenn, my dear friends - how can i allow you to rest in peace?
i would be rewarded for saving them,
yet how much longer can i resist the temptation to be amongst them?
i cannot bear it. i cannot bear it any longer.