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Party Noob stepped outside of a light brown elevator, and slowly moved their green legs forward, one by one, until they reached their doorstep. Earlier in the day, Party Noob had been eating facefuls of chocolate cake, and partying, as they did every day without fail. That day, Poob, as their friends call them, had been invited to Infected’s birthday party. Infected was one of their closest friends, and they had a blast. The two of them, along with others, like Split, Bive, and Prototype, had been playing video games, and eating an unhealthy amount of snacks. However, as they trudged along their driveway, the only thing they had been able to think about was how wrecked their house was going to be.
Every day, after they got home from partying, Poob’s house was completely destroyed by Robloxians, trying to reach the end of the “Regretevator”. Each floor of this horrific building was designed to be a challenge, such as a replica of Area 51 where you have to reactivate generators, or crossing a minefield with a prize at the end. Unfortunately, Poob’s house was one of these floors, and the goal of the players was to destroy everything they could. But the problem was, instead of the company paying for furniture replacements, Poob was left to pay for all the property damage himself, the opposite of what the players had known to be true. Poob had tried to catch the Robloxians before, but every time they aggressively poked the next elevator button, and the next, 113 times, they could never seem to find the culprits.
Poob’s mind replayed a scene from the party the previous day. During an interesting conversation about Infected’s “awesome purple power up”, which was actually a virus script attached to a couch he bought, Infected had a thought.
“Why don’t you invite me over to your house one day for a party? You always go to parties, but you’ve never got the chance to host one,” he said with a smile.
So, of course, Poob agreed, they had always wanted to host their very own party, but like Infected said, they never got the chance to host one. Poob typed each word on their messenger app carefully, typing out an invitation to send to Infected. It read, Hey Infected! Wanna come over to my house at noon, 3 days from now, for a super awesome party? Poob took a careful look over their message for any spelling or grammar mistakes, and then hit the green send button. Two hours later, Infected sent a message back, saying Yeah sure! I just checked, and I don’t have anything going on this Saturday, so that works for me! Poob’s smile widened, and they thought of all the ways that they could make this the best party ever. They could make awesome party hats, get lots of snacks, buy some movies, download some new video games, the list went on and on.
A crimson broom glided across the floor and into a dustpan of the same crimson color as Poob swept the floor. There was broken glass everywhere, as well as wood dust, plastic, and other damaged items. Poob sighed as he continued to sweep, feeling even more disappointed than every other time his house had been destroyed. This is somehow even more wrecked, I didn’t know that was possible, they thought and slightly chuckled. After hours of sweeping and throwing out all of their broken furniture, Poob plopped down into their dark blue swivel chair. They rolled up to their desk, and ordered new versions of all the broken and damaged furniture.
The clock in Poob’s house struck noon, and almost perfectly on cue, they heard the familiar, soft beep of the elevator. Poob went over to the elevator, and just as they had assumed, Infected was standing there, waiting for them happily. They welcomed Infected inside, asked if they were hungry, wanted to play a game, and bombarded them with about a million other questions.
After a couple more minutes passed by, they heard the familiar beep of the elevator once again. Infected’s eyes narrowed, and he tilted his head to the side. Meanwhile Poob shrugged, and went to the elevator with an expression getting angrier and angrier each step he took towards it. The “Regretevator” creaked open, and Infected walked towards Poob, who was now standing directly in front of the elevator, eyebrows pointed sharply down. Pest, with his blocky body, red eyes, hat, and black mandibles, was standing in front of a group of 8 Robloxians. With one leg forwards, Pest was pointing with his right hand towards the entrance of Party Noob’s house, signaling the others to go onwards. However, instead of seeing what he always saw, an empty house, he saw Poob’s angry face looking directly at him. This was the entity Poob had thought was the one leading the destruction of his house.
The Robloxians standing behind Pest had sledgehammers and crowbars, only further proving their point. Pest chuckled, but then quickly stepped back three times in fear as soon as he saw Infected. His steps looked like a bunny hopping away from a snake. He knew that Infected had the ability to remove textures from walls, which if he touched could kill him almost instantly. Pest quickly looked back before touching the wall, and just as he thought, infected had completely removed the texture, leaving its black and pink checkered look. He took a step forward so as not to hit it, but Infected and Poob were standing there menacingly, locking eye contact with him. Party Noob had his yellow arm up, ready to punch Pest, when they saw his figure, but with the same checkered pattern as the wall. Pest was stuck in one position, and missing all his code and texture.
“WHAT THE HECK INFECTED? I DIDN’T KNOW THAT WORKED ON ENTITIES TOO?!,” Party Noob yelled with a smile.
Infected looked sad, and felt like he had disappointed his friend. He almost never heard Poob yell, and Infected thought that meant they were angry with him.
“THAT WAS AWESOME!!!,” Poob yelled once again, the smile on his yellow face growing even wider.
The life in Infected’s face came back, smiling back at Party Noob. Infected high-fived Poob. After a short celebration of catching the person who had been destroying their home, Poob said that they should probably call the cops to get Pest put in jail.
Infected shrugged, “That would probably be a good idea…”
Poob dialed 911, each letter making a beep as they pressed it. After a couple of minutes, which felt like hours, the cops arrived. They were about to push Pest down to the floor and handcuff him, but Infected yelled at them not to. They took a few steps back, and Infected quickly removed the missing texture on Pest. One of the police officers quickly grabbed Pest’s arms, and held them behind his back. Pest turned his head quickly towards Party Noob, Infected, and then the other police officers as the handcuffs made a slight click. Pest’s eyes were locked on Infected as he clamped his black mandibles together, his face turning furious with rage. The police dragged Pest into their car, the red and blue lights on top flashing in his face. Pest stayed silent. He didn’t need to say anything, as his facial expression said all they ever needed to know.
The next day, after going to another epic party, Party Noob’s feet moved forward, one by one. However, this time, their feet moved quickly, they actually felt excited to return home for once. This time, they didn’t have to worry about their house being wrecked when they got back home, didn’t have to worry about cleaning up for what seemed like the millionth time, and didn’t have to spend all of their savings on new furniture. They happily opened the door to their house, sighing in relief at how clean it was. Poob plopped down onto their navy blue couch, finally having a night to relax.