Work Text:
Stanley:’groans as he leans against the wall, looking bored out of his mind’ok ford, what do you need help with? And why do you need my help? No offense bro, but there are better things I could be doing, like not dying of boredom for being in your nerd lab, surrounded by stuff I barely understand.
Ford: well-
Stanley: The portal doesn’t count.
Ford: Well, I'm doing some spring cleaning, so I need to make room for new stuff I want to build, the problem is, I don't know what to get rid of, and if there’s something you would prefer for me to keep.
Stanley: ok, and?
Ford: I just need help putting stuff away and figuring out what I want to keep, stuff we’ll need, and if we can keep it in the shack.
Stanley: Fine.
Ford: ya, and no offense, but i don’t want the government to be knocking at our doors again after what you did!
Stanley:’raises an eyebrow at him’
Ford: What?
Stanley: I thought you would know what to keep.
Ford: stanley, in case you’ve forgotten-..........ok, those were poor choice of words, sorry, but what i’m trying to say is that i’m still not used to how things work, this one is different from the dimensions i’ve been in, and i want to know what’s safe to keep and what will get us arrested by the government.
Stanley: That's fair.
Ford: so?
Stanley: ok, I'll help you.
Ford: Thank you Stanley.
Stanley: ya, I'm only doing this because I don't want to get arrested by the government again, and we can't deal with that.
Ford: ya, i’ll look for some stuff i have and show it to you, i’ll tell you what it can do and if it will cause legal trouble, or not really useful.
Stanley: sounds good to me.
Then Ford opens a cupboard and starts to look at stuff, then he picks up a plate and puts it down, Stanley raises an eyebrow at it.
Stanley: Ford, that’s a plate.
Ford: It's not a normal plate.
Stanley: It looks like a normal plate to me.
Ford: It's not, this plate is able to do what normal ones can’t do, you’ll see, just trust me, it will be worth it.
Stanley: It's better, or I might die from boredom sooner or later.
Then he grabs an apple and puts it down, then two small lasers appear from the side and cut the apple into slices, Ford picks up one of the slices and eats it, Stanley raises an eyebrow at the bowl.
Stanley: um………….
Ford: ya, you’re right, this has no use, it just feels lazy, so this can go in the “do not keep” box, and you can be honest with me, stanley.
Stanley: Are you sure?
Ford: Yes, I want to make room for inventions that can actually benefit us, and this plate does not do it.
Stanley: ya, can i break it when it’s done?
Ford: Sure, since I know it will convince you to help me.
Stanley: You know me too well, sixer, and because you know me so well, you know that i’m the right person for this job, now, what else do you have to show me? I want to see what else you made.
Ford: I got more in that locker.
Stanley: Why do you have a locker?
Ford: I'm not sure-wait, hold on, I think I got some other stuff in a room, go to the locker while i go back upstairs.
Stanley: ok.
He watched Ford go upstairs as he walked towards the locker, he opened it and started to take some stuff out of it, in a few minutes, almost everything was out of it, except for an item that seemed to be stuck in the wall.
Stanley: Dammit, it’s stuck.
Then he starts trying to pull it off, but it doesn’t work, he walks in the locker and continues trying to pull it off.
Stanley: stupid thing! Stop being stuck!
Then the locker starts shaking and closes the doors, Stanley's eyes widened and tries to push the doors open, but to no avail.
Stanley: Hey, get me out of here! Ford! Stanford! Are you there?! Answer me, please! I don’t want to be here!
Then he starts punching the locker doors, but all that did for him was cause his knuckles to bleed, blood drips down………..not again!
Stanley: not again
Flashback………
It shows Stanley being thrown in a trunk and it being closed, he holds his broken nose and black eye.
Stanley: Hey, get me out of here!
Man 2: not until you pay us back!
Stanley: And how the heck am I going to do that here?! How am I going to make any money in the trunk! Just let me out of here and I'll try to think of something! Come on, just let me out! Please! I can’t be stuck in the trunk for too long!
Man 1: you should have thought about it before you messed with us, maybe being in here will teach you a lesson.
Stanley: Don't leave me here! Please! You can’t leave me here! What if I die in the trunk?! Please! Don’t leave me here!
He starts kicking the trunk and shaking.
Stanley: I have to get out of here……..but how?
Then he tries to find anything in the trunk, but the only thing he could find in it was himself, he frowns.
Stanley: How am I going to get out of here?
Then he looks at the trunk and sighs.
Stanley: i guess there’s only one thing i can do………i have to eat my way out of a trunk, my teeth are going to hate me so much, i’m going to hate myself with this……..but i have to get out of here, i’m not going to die in this trunk!
Then he started to bite the trunk, he cried in pain, but as he bit off more and more, blood and even a few teeth fell down.
Stanley:’thinks’i have to get out of here………it hurts so much, but I'm not going to die in a fucking trunk! I’m not-
End of flashback………
Stanley: GOING TO DIE!
Ford: Stanley!
Then the locker doors open and Stanley falls out of it, he is shaking and holding himself, he touches his mouth.
Stanley: what-
Ford:’hugs him’stanley, it’s ok, i’m here, i didn’t expect for the locker door to close, but don’t worry, I'm here-
Stanley: I thought I had to eat my way out………..
Ford: What?
Stanley: i mean, i did it more than once
Ford: Wait, what?!
Stanley: ya, i mentioned that i had to eat my way out of the trunk of a car, it’s why i have dentures, i can show you if you want-
Ford: no thanks! But………
Stanley:............but what?
Ford: i-i think you told this to me when we were arguing, before it got bad……..i-i guess I didn't realize how bad it was until now………I was just so angry, scared, tired……..I was selfish, I was only thinking of myself.
Stanley: You were dealing with an insane dorito.
Ford:............you want to destroy the locker first before we look at the other stuff we got? I know we’re not keeping it.
Stanley: sounds good to me.
Ford:’hugs him’
Stanley:’hugs back and smiles’