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Japan. 3 months earlier.
Shidou was bored out of his fucking mind. So, so, so goddamn bored.
He lay sprawled in bed like an oversized cat, phone in hand. For the past two hours, all he’d done was scroll—occasionally setting it down to stare at the ceiling, then picking it back up again as if it might finally offer something worth his time.
Shidou’s life was…fine. More than fine. Great, even. He got to do what he loved most in the world: play soccer, for a living. He had a nice apartment in Tokyo, shiny trophies lining up his shelves, and all the paint supplies he could ever want. It was more than he’d ever dared to dream.
He adored the adrenaline rush from soccer, the sensation of being alive and whole, awake under the bright lights of the stadium and the roar of the crowd. It was what kept him going, what kept him anticipating the next day.
But, despite all the matches, all the goals he scored and trophies he won, all the times people chanted his name and asked for autographs and interviews…no match, in fact, nothing in the world had made him feel more alive than the match from 4 years ago.
The Japan U-20 vs Blue Lock.
Where he played alongside Sae Itoshi.
Midfielder. A legend for being both incredible at football and a shamelessly blunt asshole—so blunt that interviewers would get red-faced and only realize far too late he was not the one they should be asking questions too when he left in the middle of being asked a question. It was an understatement to say that Sae’s PR team was in shambles.
Sae Itoshi, the man who still made his heart race whenever Shidou read his name, or heard it in passing conversations, or saw a glimpse of him on TV.
Shidou sat up on his bed. He’d already stalked Sae’s socials a million times, despite how little information it gave him.
Sae’s had no personal account as far as Shidou could find (and he’d dedicated hours to his search), and the Re Al Instagram account had barely anything, like Sae knew and was being cruel on purpose. Shidou wanted to cry whenever he saw what little there was.
But the pictures that they did show? Even the barest, smallest glimpse into Sae’s life made something in Shidou twist. He liked and saved every single one to his phone. Only stared at them for a bit, though, because he wasn’t that much of a stalker. Or at least that was what he told himself.
Only that, eventually, it got to a point where it wasn’t enough.
Sitting there bored out of his mind and his thoughts continuously straying to the beautiful midfielder, he realized that it wasn’t even enough, it wasn’t real.
He wanted to see him again. No, he needed to.
To be close to him, to touch him, to be the disturbance in Sae’s life that he couldn’t get rid of.
That was when he got an idea.
His fingers rapidly tapped away, and he found himself buying some plane tickets. To Spain.
“Hell yeah,” he said to himself as the confirmation loaded on his screen, his smirk widening. He booked the earliest flight possible, one where he would only have to wait a month to finally see him.
Oh, he couldn’t wait to see the look on Sae's face.
After the purchase, he went back to his messages, to the only meaningful contact he had and texted him.
Shidou: sae-chan, watch out. A surprise is coming your way!!! 😈
And send. Shidou didn’t lay back down after that. He had some packing for an impromptu Spain trip to do.
——————————————————————
Spain, a month later.
The second that Shidou’s plane landed in Barcelona, Spain, adrenaline hit his bloodstream and rushed through his veins at the very idea that Sae was right here, in this city. In reach.
Finally.
He rushed through the whole process on instinct, his hands automatically moving to pick up his backpack at the baggage claim area, immediately whipping out his phone as he made his way towards the exit door.
It was around 9:30pm, and the jet lag hadn’t kicked in for him, evident in the huge grin sported as he texted Sae.
Shidou: guessss where I just landed!!!!
To Shidou’s pleasant surprise, the reply came in fast. Shidou’s heart began to race the moment the text bubbles popped up. He stopped walking, knowing he would bump into someone with how distracted he was.
Sae: you’re in spain aren’t you.
Shidou smirked, smug now that Sae had ignored his vague message when Shidou had first purchased the tickets.
Shidou: that’s righttt! here to see my favorite midfielder 😘
Shidou: where you attt
He waited, every second dragging for far too long. His feet tapped against the tiled floor impatiently.
Then, Sae sent a ping to his location.
Shidou screeched, loud enough that a couple people nearby glanced at him but he couldn’t care less.
He was really going to see him again.
——————————————————————
“Beer, really, Sae-chan? Not that I’m judging— I just imagined you’d be more of a…wine-cooler guy. If that.”
Shidou slid into the stool beside him, grinning so wide he probably looked unhinged. He couldn’t help it. He couldn’t believe this was real, that he was actually sitting next to Sae Itoshi again. After what had felt like a lifetime and then some.
“I’m neither. This tastes like shit,” Sae commented, pushing the half-full drink away, earning a disgruntled look from the bartender. Sae, however, was too busy taking Shidou in to notice, like he hadn’t processed this yet either.
“The bar closes at 11.” The bartender reminded them gruffly, nodding towards the clock on the wall, informing them it was 10:53.
“What an early hour to close,” Sae yawned, then stood, pushing the check across the wood without so much of a glance.
“Guess you won’t be finishing that beer tonight!” Shidou smirked, hooking his arm around Sae’s neck like he’d always belonged there.
Sae sighed as they walked out of the bar. The night breeze hit them both like a stark reminder that this wasn’t some dream. Sae adjusted his scarf.
“You haven’t changed at all. Let’s go, demon.”
“Oooh, where? Your apartment?” Shidou’s smirk widened as they walked side by side on the pavement.
“Where else?” Sae shoved his hands into his pockets. He wasn’t into the party scene in late night Spain, preferring to be home or at the gym by himself. Wherever it was quiet. But he didn’t seem to mind Shidou’s company too much tonight.
Shidou was giddy, bouncing on the balls on his feet. Sae could act as nonchalant as he wanted, but Shidou knew it was a big deal. His apartment? Yeah, Shidou had won the fucking lottery and he knew it.
Shidou wasn’t paying attention to where the hell they were going. He didn’t care. He was high on the happiness he felt simply being in Sae’s orbit.
He took this opportunity to ask a million questions by the minute, his curiosity boundless when it came to him. Sae replied with short responses, which only made Shidou want to ask more and more.
Eventually, he noticed they had stopped at a train station.
The glow from the llamposts making Sae look even more angelic than usual, even if he was doing something completely mundane like buying train tickets.
Shidou glanced around, noticing the suitcases, the late-night crowd, everyone moving like they had somewhere to be.
He had no idea trains were this popular in Spain. And the lines were no joke, either.
He turned back to Sae, stepping closer.
“What’s with the sudden detour, Sae-chan?”
Sae looked at him like it was a little too late to be asking that.
“All the bars near me are so lukewarm, I can’t stand it. So I take the train to find some new ones every now and then.”
“You said you didn’t even like the beer from this one, though.”
“Yeah…” Sae shrugged daintily. “I’ll just have to keep looking.” As if taking trains just to go to bars was a fun hobby. And maybe it was, for someone so strange. Sometimes Shidou wanted to study him, figure out what was going on in that mind, what thoughts were behind that face.
Then Sae looked at him properly, having purchased the tickets, and Shidou’s heart nearly burst out of his chest.
Everytime their eyes met like that, Shidou felt it like a left hook right to his stomach. It was a violent, sudden feeling, to be with Sae like this.
Even when Sae was barely sparing him a glance Shidou wanted to spend his entire life chasing that feeling—verging on a bright explosion.
“Well,” Sae muttered, looking away as if the moment was over. “Let’s go.” Shidou clamped his mouth shut, realizing his jaw had been hanging open like an idiot. But who could even blame him? Sae’s beauty was unfair.
“Right,yeah…” Shidou followed him toward the line. They weaved through the crowd who pushed to get on the train.
“Goddamn…Is this place always this crowded?” Shidou muttered as people jostled past him with heavy bags and coats. He pressed closer to Sae, not wanting to get separated in the crowd.
Sae ignored Shidou’s question and suddenly grabbed his hand.
Sae’s grip tightened as he pushed through people to reach the train doors. Shidou didn’t fight it and let himself be led. He had been waiting for this kind of closeness for ages.
“I swear,” Sae grumbled under his breath “If we miss the train…”
Something about the way he said it made Shidou chuckle, even if he should have had more urgency. Sae spared Shidou a glance as they neared the train's doors.
“What’s so funny?”
“Nothing, nothing…just cute how you’re all worked up over this.” Shidou grinned at Sae.
Sae rolled his eyes and tugged Shidou inside the train, where the doors closed behind them.
It was full as hell in here too. People squeezed past each other trying to find empty seats. Shidou looked down, bemused.
“Woah…so many people. Maybe we can make this work if you sit on my lap.” He suggested with a sly smirk.
“Don’t be ridiculous, demon.” Sae scoffed, moving under the overhead handlebars. Shidou was still smiling as he followed him. Well, it was worth a try.
Despite the rejection of his generous offer, Shidou took this as yet another opportunity to bother Sae. He rested his chin on Sae’s shoulder, asking more random questions about what he’d been doing all this time in Spain and supplying the occasional story about what was happening back in Japan.
Shidou had always laughed out loud at Sae’s interview clips online. Sae’s answers were always clipped and blunt. And he is having the real life version now. Annoyed as hell like he would rather be anywhere else but he made no move to shove Shidou away.
It was perfect like this, standing in the middle of a crowded train, pressed close to Sae’s warm body. Shidou felt alive in a way he couldn’t explain. He hadn’t really pictured anything when buying the plane ticket, but this was better than what his imagination could conjure.
When Shidou ran out of things to ask—he’d save the rest for later, absolute on contuining to torture him, his hand shifted. Careful, slow.
Their fingertips brushed. He heard Sae sigh, and their fingers fully entwined.
Shidou’s breath hitched.
There was no way this was real, but here he was.
The train could derail off the track and catch on fire, but it wouldn’t even matter to Shidou. He doubted he’d even notice. He had never wanted somebody more than this.
Really, he couldn’t have pictured a night more perfect. He smiled and leaned further into Sae, burying his face in the crook of Sae’s neck.
——————————————————————
A few more seconds with his face buried in Sae’s neck, which smelled fucking amazing, and Shidou would have definitely fallen asleep.
But the train lurched, coming to a sudden stop, and Sae tugged Shidou by their entwined hands. Shidou blinked and rubbed at his face with his free hand.
“Hurry up, there’s something I want to show you.” Sae urged Shidou as they stepped off the platform.
Shidou opened his mouth to ask, but stopped himself. Maybe he had actually fallen asleep and this was a dream.
Still, if Sae was still going to hold his hand, then maybe it wasn’t too bad of a dream.
If he has to guess, it was around midnight— the streets were quiet and sleepy. Only a few stragglers speaking in hushed tones to their phones or walking silently on the sidewalks. The lampposts cast a dim, silvery wash on the tiles.
Sae crossed the streets and led them down a grassy hillside that overlooked a lake.
The moon perfectly reflected on the clear, dark water, the silver circle creating the illusion of a hole in the middle of the lake.
Various tiny flowers floated around the water. Shidou stared, enamored, before sitting down on the grass next to Sae.
He reached out, gently lifting one of the flowers off the water, a small pink one, and turning it over on his fingers.
“I got lost in Spain a lot when I first got here.” Sae said quietly, his gaze fixed on the lake. “Since I didn’t know Spanish, it was hard to ask for directions. But that’s how I ended up discovering places like this one.”
Shidou studied him for a moment, before leaning back and laying against the grass, feeling the blades tickle his cheeks.
“Were you scared?”
He heard Sae make a soft sound, maybe a laugh, but when he turned to look, Sae's face was as deadpan as ever, moonlight reflecting on his skin.
“Of course not” Sae said immediately, but he hesitated, before adding, “But I’m glad I got to find places like this.”
Shidou hadn’t ever heard Sae say something like that.
Soft, almost fond and sweet. He smiled to himself. He liked it when Sae was an aloof jerk, but the sweet side of Sae was adorable too.
“Soo…” Shidou propped himself up on one elbow. “Why’d you bring little old me here?”
Sae paused, then shrugged.
“I figured you’d be the type to enjoy a place like this.”
Shidou stared at him before breaking into a giggle. “Awww, am I hearing this right? You were thinking
about me?”
“Clearly not as much as you were about me.” Sae replied coolly. “The Re Al social media manager told me you’ve been liking all our photos.”
Shidou looked at him instantly, a sheepish smirk forming.
“I just missed your pretty face. Can you blame me?”
Their eyes met then, and Sae leaned closer to him, face hovering over Shidou’s.
“And you came all the way over to Spain to see my pretty face again?” Sae murmured.
Shidou swallowed. “Among other things, yeah…” Like I’ve been wanting to talk to you again, or just be near you, feel alive in the way I only can when you’re close to me.
But if he dared voice it out loud…would Sae even be okay with that? Would it be too much? Was he crazy for wanting this, even though he was so sure Sae wanted it too?
Sae cut through those thoughts in his smooth voice.
“Then I guess I could open up an Instagram account. So you can stalk me ethically.” Sae considered.
Shidou’s eyes widened. “And I’d be the only person you follow back, riiiiight?” He batted his eyelashes.
Sae scoffed. “Don’t get ahead of yourself.”
“Okay, okay… could we get matching bios? Profile pictures? You could put my initials and a heart emoji right next to it…”
Shidou would have suggested a few other ridiculous ideas, if Sae hadn’t sighed and closed the distance between their faces right then, effectively shutting him up with a kiss.
Shidou froze for half a second, surprised by the boldness, but he immediately melted into it. Sae’s mouth was warm and soft, tasting vaguely of cherry chapstick and Shidou was hungry.
He fisted his hands into Sae’s hair, fingers curling into the reddish-brown strands and deepened the kiss.
He felt like that again, alive, burning and caught aflame, speeding up and not slowing down and he could explode from how good it felt.
Shidou was positive nobody has ever wanted anyone as much as he wanted Sae Itoshi.
When Sae pulled back, Shidou’s heart, which was going a mile a minute, beat a little faster at the sight of that beautiful smile, impossible to get used to. God, did he ever stop being gorgeous?
“That…” Shidou managed, breath catching. “Wow, Sae.”
“Get up, demon.” Sae said, voice rough around the edges. “I can’t kiss you properly if we’re on the grass like this.”
Shidou laughed, standing up and immediately taking Sae’s hand, their fingers entwining. For the second time tonight.
Yeah, Shidou would be thinking about this night forever.
“Huh, here I was thinking it was pretty romantic.” Shidou said.
“Sure,” Sae replied. “Just like how it’s attractive you have grass all over your hair right now.”
Sae raised his hand to brush some of the grass off of Shidou’s hair, the small smile still playing on his face.
“You know you find me super hot and amazing.” Shidou teased, looking down at Sae, who smirked.
“Whatever boosts that ego of yours.”
———————————————————————
The walk to Sae’s apartment complex was longer than Shidou expected.
He had no idea why Sae had chosen to take a long trek just to end up at a shitty bar, but he wasn’t complaining.
He got to hold Sae’s hand again, which excited Shidou so much that he swung their joined hands back and forth between them like a little kid.
Shidou knew he wasn’t going to stay in Spain for too long, having only brought one backpack with his things. It was simple and manageable.
But he wanted to savor the moment. He had never once taken back what he’d said to Sae at the U-20 match against Blue Lock.
With you, I feel a sensation I’ve never felt before. I want to play football with you forever!
It had been four years, sure, and so many things had changed. They had their own lives separate from Blue Lock, in two completely different continents, with days full of other people and responsibilities, and their personalities were as contrasting as ever.
But the inexplicable pull stayed. Had endured all those years and changes, all the texts Sae had answered so late and the video calls that could last hours or minutes. It had survived, and Shidou liked to think it was stronger than before.
He squeezed Sae’s hand as he turned the corner to where Sae’s apartment complex was.
It came into view—manicured lawns and fresh coats of paint indicating wealth that would have admittedly impressed Shidou in any other situation but right now, it didn’t matter. It didn’t compare to this, to Sae being within reach.
The second Sae unlocked the door, Shidou was all over him again.
Pressing them against the wall, he cupped Sae’s face and leaned in for a kiss, only stopped by Sae’s finger pressed gently on his lips.
“Stay the night.” He whispered.
His teal eyes were intense when they met Shidou’s. Shidou smirked against Sae’s fingers, gently pulling his hand down.
He loved how he said it, not a suggestion, but a command. The only logical outcome.
“I’ll stay forever if you let me.” Shidou promised, voice low.
And then—finally—his lips finally found Sae’s again.