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It was the early hours of the morning, and for some reason Pomni had not stopped coughing. It wasn't like she was ill, that would be impossible, but her chest was aching painfully and the coughing had been nonstop for the past five hours. It was as though there was something caught in her throat that refused to dislodge, and this dry coughing was only making it more painful.
Exhausted, Pomni propped herself up in her bed, maybe the shift in position would help her stop. But, as she shuffled around to sit, the cough stopped. Was it over?
The jester stayed still for a moment, maybe if she didn't move, didn't breathe, the coughing would stop all together, and she could go to sleep. But that thought was short lived as the coughing began once again, followed by an odd taste in her mouth. It started out rather metallic, reminiscent of blood, but Caine had assured her that blood was not a feature he had outside of his adventures. The metallic taste was quickly replaced with an earthy flavour, and just seconds later, Pomni coughed out a couple of flower petals, and she watched as they gently fell to the ground.
The jester hopped off her bed and inspected the small petals, noting the tiniest bit of blood sullying their soft anatomy. It was odd. And at this point she was convinced that she was just dreaming. Not to mention the coughing had completely subsided.
Pomni hopped back into bed, falling face first into her pillow. She was exhausted and fell asleep within seconds.
The next morning she woke, and glanced down at the ground where she had coughed up a petals. A very vivid dream, she thought, until her eyes landed on the dried, bloodied flower petals. Fear made itself known, starting in her chest, and flowing around her body like blood through veins until it consumed her entire being.
She needed to call for help. But, maybe this was a one off thing, and it could've been a residual side effect from their most recent adventure. She almost laughed at the memory of it. Caine had taken them all to the new flower fields he'd created since he'd returned from the void, and he'd showed off a couple of bee hives. It was sweet the way he over explained the ins and outs of the hive mind, all the bees working with the queen to protect and serve the hive. Pomni was smitten for the ring leader. Something she would take to the grave if she could. Not to mention she was certain that Caine had started courting the moon, and she could understand why. The celestial being had loved him for years, and while he had never outright said it, Pomni was certain that the ring master would pursue the blue crescent.
Her chest ached again, that dull cough making itself known again. But she pushed through, and headed to the main tent. Today was going to be pretty laid back, Kinger was going to be down in the aquarium, reading to Queenie; Zooble was going to be practicing making cocktails while Gangle sat at the bar doodling; and Ragatha was getting in some softball practice. Maybe Pomni would join the rag doll for that. Though, if this cough was going to keep up, she wouldn't be able to run the bases. But, it would keep her mind busy, so she decided that playing a bit of softball would be how she started the day.
"Hey, Pomni!" Ragatha called as the jester made it to the lounge area. She was already in her softball costume, about to head out.
"Hey, Ragatha." Pomni greeted, doing her best to quell that cough. "Would it be okay if I joined you today?" She asked.
"Was that Pomni asking to join us for softball?" The ring leader's voice rang from behind her. The jester felt her heart beat faster, a more prominent blush threatening to override her permanent rosy cheeks.
"U-Uhhh, yeah?" Pomni answered, suddenly unsure of everything. She was hoping to avoid Caine today, but it seemed she was out of luck. She turned around to find him in his own softball outfit, the polo shirt following the contour of his chest. Yeah, she was going to lose miserably, because she wasn't going to be able to stop staring at him.
"Wonderful, between you, me, Ragatha, and the gloinks, we have plenty of players!" Caine announced brightly. "Plus, Kinger will come along for a bit." He added, pointing to the chess piece.
"We'll let you get changed, and we'll see you out there?" Ragatha offered. She had noticed that Pomni was barely focused on anything anyone had said and had been staring at Caine. Specifically his chest. But her offer seemed to have pulled Pommi out of that trance.
"R-right." Pomni muttered, shuffling over to the changing room and stepping in. Her body was flung about a little bit before being dumped back out, now in a softball cap and polo. That would never not hurt.
Out on the pitch, Pomni and Caine ended up as a team, a few of the gloinks with them. The jester was pitching, the pain in her chest was making itself known, causing her throws to be a little lackluster. She was thankful she didn't have to run anywhere though, that cough would have probably killed her by now if she'd run from base to base. It helped that the last two batters had been gloinks, so Pomni had blamed the lack of power on trying to accommodate for the small creatures. But, the next player strolling up to bat was Ragatha, so Pomni would actually have to try or else be called out.
Her chest was yelling at her as she wound up her arm, and she did her best to ignore the pain welling in her throat as she released the ball. For a split second she thought, maybe Ragatha would miss, after all Pomni's throws had been terrible thus far, but the rag doll's bat came in contact with the white ball, a crisp sound echoing across the arena as the two objects collided. The jester did her best to follow the ball's trajectory, even managed to get a glimpse of Caine running wildly in an attempt to catch it, only to watch him crash into the metal gate. He really was adorable, the little stars that appeared around his head as he fell backwards. She smiled, a small blush settling on her cheeks, before she looked back to Ragatha who'd been scooped up by the gloink queen. The jester was left a little confused, but the rag doll only gave her a smug look in return.
Pomni just smiled and jogged over to Caine, the stars still circling him as he lay flat on the ground. But, just as she reached him another coughing fit began. She was supposed to make sure he was okay, that's why she had hurried over; instead Caine shot up off the ground and helped the small jester over to the shade, and gave her a bottle of water. She tried to down it, but that just made the coughing worse.
"Is everything okay?" Pomni heard Ragatha ask, she had run over to see what had happened. "Pomni?" She asked, kneeling down next to the jester.
"She started coughing, and I thought water would help, but she hasn't stopped yet." Caine answered when both of them realised that Pomni wasn't able to.
"C-can we get sick now!?" Ragatha asked out loud, panic lacing her voice. It was a reasonable conclusion, Pomni thought. Caine was different now, so maybe the rules had changed and they could get sick.
"No! You shouldn't be able to." Caine answered and that just made Pomni's stomach drop. "You shouldn't really even need to cough, so I have no idea what's happening." He continued and Pomni really wished he would stop because the fear that was running through her body was clearly on caffeine or adrenaline, because within seconds she could feel her body vibrating followed by complete numbness. The coughing continued of course, and that familiar metallic taste had resurfaced in the back of her throat, followed by that earthy, floral taste. Pomni put her hands to her mouth in anticipation, and finally, after a few minutes of painful heaving, out of her mouth came petals, more than last night, riddled with blood and saliva. She could breathe properly again. Pomni was right in covering her mouth, allowing her to catch the petals in her hands before the others could notice them, and she could also wipe away the blood that had smudged across her lips. She did her best to shove the petals into some form of pocket, resulting in just shoving them behind her for the moment, before she picked up another water bottle and downed the drink in one. The cool liquid soothed her burning throat for a moment, and she felt calm again.
"Pomni?" Ragatha tried. "Are you okay?" Her voice was timid, as if she was scared of what the jester would answer with.
"Me? Oh, I-I'm fine." Pomni lied, her smile was wobbly and she had a feeling she needed to embellish this lie, otherwise Ragatha would caringly interrogate the small jester until she had no choice but to answer her. "I'm probably still getting used to, uhh, conjuring things, makes me a little tired, and maybe it translated to a cough because that's what I associate with overworking?" She said, not convinced either of them would believe her. She barely believed it herself.
"Hmmmm." Caine hummed. "Well, that could certainly be it, but let's get you back to the tent, and please try to get some rest, my delicate daffodil." He continued, opening up the portal just next to him, gently offering Pomni a hand - she gladly accepted it, and definitely did not think about how warm he felt - and he pulled her through.
Ragatha watched as they disappeared through the portal, leaving her behind to gather Kinger and the gloinks. Not that she minded. Pomni was clearly in some form of trouble, and the rag doll was glad that Caine could get her to safety as quickly as possible. The red head sighed with a smile, Pomni would be fine. Her eyes fell to where Pomni had been sitting, and she glanced away, until her brain registered what she'd seen. She moved a little closer, small red petals, from that of a camellia, each one spattered with blood.
"What the...?" She hesitantly picked one up. Where did these come from, and why were they just sitting here behind Pomni?
Ragatha ran through the situation that just happened. Pomni was coughing, a lot, and then she did a series pretty painful sounding ones into her hands, and then she was fine. "Coughing, a few painful ones into her hands, and then nothing..." the red head muttered to herself, repeating it over and over until something clicked. Her eye widened in realisation.
These hadn't spawned here, Pomni had coughed them up, and didn't want anyone to know. All the rag doll could feel was a numbing sense of dread. This wasn't normal, and even if the circus itself was far from normal, she knew that Caine would never have included something like this.
Gently, Ragatha scooped up the petals and placed them in her pocket. She vaguely remembered something Gangle once told her. It was a long time ago, but she was sure that if she went to Gangle, she could find out what was going on with Pomni.
"Hey, Kinger! Mum!" She called out, doing her best to keep her voice steady. The chess piece emerged from the entry gate and made his way over to the doll, and the gloink queen, along with all her children, slithered over to her adopted daughter. "L-Let's go back to the tent, okay?" She said, gesturing to the portal.
"Of course, sweetheart, did Caine already go through?" The giant queen asked, ushering her children through the glowing door.
"Yeah, Pomni needed a break." Ragatha answered. Her mum nodded and pressed a delicate kiss to the top of her red hair before squeezing through the small portal. "You ready to go, Kinger?" She asked, turning to the tall man.
"I certainly am." Kinger responded, a smile in his voice. "I hope Pomni is okay, coughing like that is rather unusual for folks like us." He continued.
"Yeah." Ragatha muttered as the two of them finally moved through the portal and entered the big top.
Upon entering the tent, it didn't take long for Ragatha to figure out that Pomni had already gone off to hide somewhere, hopefully not to cough up more flower petals, but without knowing why it had happened in the first place, Ragatha could only assume it would happen again.
Caine was just sitting on the red sofa, bouncing one leg and fidgeting with his top hat. The rag doll briefly wondered if she should tell him what she had found, show him the strange evidence, but before she could open her mouth to speak, Kinger had called out to the ring master first.
"Caine, son, would you like to come visit Queenie and the others with me?" He asked sweetly, placing a gentle hand to Caine's shoulder.
The ring master looked up to the chess piece and, with a reluctant look in his eyes, he nodded. Maybe he could calm his nerves by spending time in the dark aquarium.
Ragatha watched as the two of them headed off, hand in hand, much like a father and son. She supposed that they were just that, in a way, even if Kinger was only partially responsible for Caine's creation.
She turned towards the bar, a determined look in her eye. Gangle had to know what this was.
The sound of ice being shaken around, the pouring of liquid into a lavish glass, and the plop of an added cherry. Zooble was impressed. Gangle had gotten the hang of this really quickly.
"Hey, uhh, Gangle?" Ragatha's voice cut through her flow and the ribbon stopped pouring the third drink she'd made.
"Oh, hey Ragatha." Zooble greeted as the rag doll walked up to the bar stools, her quiet footsteps somewhat apprehensive.
"Hi Ragatha, would you like a drink?" Gangle asked as the taller woman hopped up onto one of the stools.
"Uhhh, sure." The rag doll smiled, watching as Zooble immediately got to work on a cosmopolitan. They could tell something was up though, Ragatha had that look on her face that screamed: "help".
"So, what's up?" Zooble asked, placing the cosmo in front of Ragatha, only to be answered by the rag doll placing a bunch of flower petals on the counter. The toy box looked confused for a moment, and decided it would be easier to just give up on searching for their own answer. "Flower petals?" They cocked an eyebrow.
"N-Not just any petals." Ragatha corrected. "Pomni, uhh, well, she, umm, she kinda coughed them up." Ragatha continued, rushing the explanation out.
Gangle dropped the glass she'd been holding and her eyes filled with dread. Ragatha was worried for a second that they had offended the ribbon, the mixture of shear shock and terror.
"Pomni coughed these up!?" She repeated, her voice trembling as she spoke. But, her tone was laced with a recognition that Zooble could recognise; one that Gangle often used whenever talking about anime tropes, or other fantasy terminology.
"What does it mean?" Zooble butted in, tidying the glass at their partner's feet.
"Is Pomni... I mean, has she been acting weird around anyone?" Gangle started. She knew what this could be, of course she did. Hanahaki disease was a well known illness within fan fictions and manga, but for it to have manifested somehow within the circus, it shocked her.
"She stares at Caine. A lot." Zooble said. The remains of the glass safely swept up and placed in a bin. "I'm surprised she hasn't been caught yet." They added, a mild chuckle in their voice. It was somewhat funny seeing Pomni fumble over herself because of Caine of all people.
"Maybe, not that I've noticed it a whole lot, but I did catch her staring at him before we left today." Ragatha agreed. She wouldn't have classed that as weird though.
"Would you say that she has a crush on him?" Gangle needed them both to clarify.
"Oh yeah." Zooble nodded. "It's so fucking obvious, I'm surprised I've been the only one to notice it so far."
"She has a crush on Caine?" Ragatha questioned. She hadn't considered that a possibility as to why Pomni could be staring at the AI.
"Maybe." Gangle muttered. They really needed a plan to figure out if that was the case. Zooble wasn't one to lie, but Ragatha was usually quite aware of the subtle things that hinted to a blossoming relationship. "We need to find out. Firstly who Pomni has a crush on, but more importantly if she believes her crush to be fully one sided." Gangle explained.
"Why?" Zooble wondered.
"Oh, well, uhh, the thing that Pomni might have is caused from unrequited love." The ribbon began. "It's a fictional disease though, and I hope that it's not the case here, because the solutions are a bit terrifying and two of them are very extreme."
"Wait, it's a made up disease!?" The toy box asked. Gangle only nodded.
"It's a manga trope, gets used a lot for fan fictions." The ribbon said. "It's called hanahaki disease, and it affects people who believe their love is unrequited. So, whoever Pomni may be crushing on, she thinks it's one sided, and it's causing her to cough up these." Gangle pointed to the small petals on the counter top. "And, it'll only get worse. She could be coughing up whole flowers soon, plus we don't know how long this has been happening for."
"Oh, God." Ragatha muttered. The three of them exchanged worried looks, but a determination budded and with a nod, the three characters went to find Pomni.
Pomni had practically turned bright red after Caine pulled her through the portal. He was fussing over her, checking her character model, trying to get to the root of her coughing.
"Caine." She said sternly, stopping the ring master while he was mid staring at her chest, the origin of her coughing fit. It just made her blush all the more obvious. "I-I'm fine." She managed to mutter.
He seemed unconvinced but took a step back regardless. "Okay, okay, I trust you." He told her. "But, if you do ever need anything, please tell me." He added, his voice dropping low and really how was that fair? Pomni had no chance of hiding the blush on her face this time. His voice was like velvet when he let it drop this low, something she definitely did not have dreams about, and she definitely did not fantasise him saying lewd things to her in the late hours of the night, that would be absurd.
"G-Great, well, I'm going to get some rest, like you said, and I will see you later?" She mumbled, giving Caine the weakest smile she could muster.
"Of course, my dear, get some rest." The ring master said, and with that Pomni hurried off. Her chest was aching once again, and she knew a coughing fit was bound to happen. She practically sprinted to her room and slammed the door behind her. She doubled over as more petals flew from her mouth. This was definitely not the aftermath of an adventure, this was something different and she had no idea what it could be.
The coughing only worsened as the days went on. Pomni had started hiding herself away whenever she could, the dull aching now constant, and an ever present bloody taste rested on her tongue. Gangle had cornered her a few days ago, asked about how she was doing, asked about a specific ring leader, to which the jester mumbled out a poor excuse before running to her room. Ragatha had approached her at one point, asking if she could help organise something for Caine to enjoy, the mention of his name made Pomni's heart beat fast and painfully. She quickly declined the offer and found a series of tunnels, coughing up a whole flower that time. Even Zooble had run up to her, asked her for her thoughts on Caine. It was getting ridiculous. She had a sneaking suspicion they had somehow discovered her crush on the AI, and it just made her panic more. First the flower thing, now the bombardment of questions regarding Caine, she decided that hiding in her room was the best thing to do. Plus, the number of petals and flowers that now littered her bedroom floor? She feared that letting anyone in would only result in them refusing to leave until they found out why she had so many of them.
Pomni coughed again, more blood than flowers splattered onto her bed. She was beginning to find breathing impossible difficult, and she resigned herself to maybe, finally, calling for help. But as she opened her mouth to call for Caine she choked out another flower. And just when she thought she had a moment to call for him, a knock at her door startled her.
"Pomni?" To her surprise it was Kinger, his voice was quiet. "Would I be able to come in?" He asked, worry smothering his words, and really she didn't want to deny him. She did trust the man.
"Y-yeah." The jester croaked, slinking off the bed and falling to the ground. Another bout of coughs as she inched closer to the door. Flower after flower forcing their way out of her chest.
Upon opening the door though, she realised her mistake. Everyone was staring at her, then at the petals and flowers, the blood. Pomni found herself locking eyes with Caine, watching the dread and fear spread across his features. Why had they brought him along? Her heart ached deeply for him, and she wanted to cry.
The jester went to shut her door on their faces, but her force was weak and Zooble easily pushed against the door to keep it open.
"We're here to help, Pomni." They said, watching as the jester helplessly fell backwards before coughing up a myriad of flowers.
"Is this some kind of abstraction?" Caine muttered, his voice was incredibly quiet, and Pomni decided that wasn't right.
"No." Gangle had answered. "This is something called hanahaki." She said before explaining to Kinger and the ring master what the symptoms were and why it had manifested.
The ribbon turned to Pomni, strode into her room and sat down next to her. "Pomni, I need you to tell me." Her voice was stern and Pomni wanted to squirm beneath her gaze, but she was so very tired. "Do you love Caine?"
Pomni didn't answer, not immediately. No. Her eyes watched Caine as he looked at anything else other than her, a blush setting across his lower jaw. He was too cute like that.
The jester sighed and nodded.
"Okay." Gangle muttered. "Your options are: let the disease run it course, killing you via suffocation; surgically removing the flowers, meaning you won't be able to love Caine again; or, you need to have your love reciprocated." The ribbon explained.
Pomni tried to run through the options. Dying would be too scary she decided, so that was a definite no. She was still convinced that Caine would never lover her, so that left her with only one choice.
"Surgery." The jester muttered. "Probably the only option I have, right?" She coughed, several flowers tumbling to the ground.
"Well..." Gangle started, wanted to argue her point. She didn't have the chance to though as Caine stepped forwards.
"Why do you think I can't love you?" He asked, sitting himself the other side of Pomni. Her eyes hadn't left him once.
"The moon." Pomni croaked out. "She's love you far longer than I've even been here. Why would you love me?" She told him. It hurt to say it out loud, her chest and her heart were burning painfully, and tears finally formed at the corners of her eyes.
Caine sighed. "The moon does love me, you're right." He agreed, watching as the tears spilled from her eyes, and he gently took the jester's hand in his own. "But I never felt that way about her. In all honesty I never truly felt any form of love until you arrived, Pomni." He admitted, and once again his voice was low and sultry.
"But why would you ever chose someone like me?" The jester cried, gripping Caine's hand tightly.
"Because you are wonderful, kind, beautiful, strong headed, amazing, thoughtful, smart, caring..." Caine began to list through all the things he loved about Pomni. She found herself laughing quietly between coughs, she wanted to believe him, but her mind kept telling her he was just saying all this to make her happy. Breathing was nearing impossible, and she had a feeling she would be turning blue in a matter of seconds.
"Shit." Zooble cursed, watching as Pomni's chest stopped moving and her face turned a bright shade of blue. "I don't think she believes you, Caine!" They continued.
The ring master was at a loss. How could he convince Pomni that he did love her? What could he do? 'Think... Come on, Caine, think about what Pomni likes...... tell her how you feel.' He told himself.
Leaning down, Caine shuffled close to the jester. He didn't wish for anyone else to hear this, it would be for her ears only. As an extra measure he snapped his fingers, forcing Gangle away, and setting everyone just outside of Pomni's room.
"Pomni, my dear, I need you to listen. I'm often not good with words, and I realise it'll be difficult for me to fully convey to you just how much I do love you. I am ashamed to admit this, but, I have often run simulations, some were on purpose, but recently they've been occurring on their own, and they've been about how to ask you to be with me, or sometimes you're already with me, and we spend time just watching the bees collect pollen, or we go exploring in creepy old abandoned buildings. One time, I had one where we filmed ourselves, you had bought a tripod so we could set up the camera at one point, and well, I couldn't help it. You'd set it up and you were about to explain what building we were in, and I kissed you. T-That was one of the, uhhh, unpromted simulations, and, well, again, I feel ashamed to say, but we, uhh, we did some very not family-friendly stuff there. So, yeah, I could keep rambling I suppose..." Caine told her, his voice never rising above a whisper. Pomni just felt her chest tighten and release, her body burning in tandem as a cough threatened to bring up more flowers. Breathing was easier.
"I want to show you..." He muttered, lifting his head so that he was face to face with the jester. "I need to show you... how much I love you." He added, and it took a moment for Pomni to realise that, as he closed his mouth and leaned in, this was how he would kiss her. Her face flushed bright red as the front of his teeth met her lips and he slowly kissed her. She thought he would stop at one small kiss, because this was Caine, and why would he do anything more, but he just held himself above her, pressing into the kiss as much as he could without flattening her. Pomni let her eyes close, melting into the kiss. He was so caring and gentle with her as they sat. Pomni managed to find the strength in her arms, and snaked them around where Caine's neck would be, letting them rest between his shoulder blades. He was warm, and soft, and Pomni just took it all in. She loved him so much, and it no longer hurt.
He loved her, too.