Chapter Text
It happened on a Tuesday, when Darling Charming was in the middle of doing push-ups.
(Really, she ought to have been studying for the Princessology exam the next day-- far more urgent than a daily exercise assignment-- but having transferred into Hero Training classes so very, very late in the year, she simply could not afford to fall behind. Besides... as a Charming, she'd been throneschooled in Princessology before she could even talk. She was pretty sure that she could ace the exam on history of royal footwear in her sleep, if it came down to it.)
But what mattered more that what she was doing or where she'd been doing it was that a bouquet of flowers had come flying through her window.
This was kind of a big deal.
Prior to having woken Apple White with what she'd been repeatedly assured was True Love's Kiss, having a bouquet of flowers (or several) come flying through her window was a fairly common occurrence. Seeing Book End villagers or some of the many, many princes at Ever After High gazing lovelorn at the bottom of her balcony was even more common.
However, ever since Blondie Lockes had seen to broadcasting via MirrorCast that it had been Darling's sort-of-kind-of-not-really-CPR which had woken Apple White from her magically-induced poison apple slumber, Darling's countless admirers had seemed to cease their appearances almost entirely. Sure, she'd gotten the occasional plea for a date or autograph, but the proposals, at least, had come to a screeching halt. Darling herself guessed that the reasoning behind this might be that her suitors didn't think they could compete with the future Queen of All Realms for the princess' affections.
Well, she thought, they would be right on that account, though not for the reasons they believe.
Despite having only spoken to Apple occasionally prior to the re-institution of the Dragon Games, there had always been a part of her which had admired Apple's poise, her care for her citizens, her wholehearted devotion to duty. There were times where Darling wished she could be satisfied with destiny like that, instead of nearly bored to tears. Plus... well, she was kind of adorable, Darling admitted to herself. And it didn't hurt that Apple had already been approved by the Charming Committee for Acceptable Future Spouses back when their parents had thought she and Daring would share a destiny.
Darling herself was still yet uncertain what it meant for the both of them. There had been rumors dancing around of whether or not their "true love" was romantic or platonic, or even whether the Evil Queen's poisoned apple had truly been the apple of the fairytale. Still... she was more than open to exploring the option. Maybe it wasn't true love at first sight, exactly, but it was definitely a little bit of a crush, and Darling was still trying to work up the courage to ask her out for a Hocus Latte sometime. Having never been the one to do the asking out before, it was certainly a more anxious undertaking than she'd anticipated.
Of course, there were always those suitors who refused to take the hint that Darling was not interested in them, and it seemed her mysterious bouquet-giver was one of them. With the much put-upon sigh of someone who'd been rejecting proposals for years, Darling stuck her head out the window, not even bothering to put a blouse over her workout clothes.
Apple White waved up at her from the ground, seeming almost uncharacteristically shy. Her fair, round cheeks bore a subtle dusting of apple-red flush.
"Um," she began, trying a smile, "Hi?"
"Um," Darling reddened, taken aback by how utterly sweet Apple seemed in that moment. She awkwardly held up the bouquet which had been tossed in her window. "Is this... yours?"
"Well, it's... from me," Apple tried to explain. There was the sound of rustling pages. "Now, let's see... object thrown, check. Attention garnered, check..."
It was in that moment Darling noticed she was holding a checklist. And though Darling herself had never seen this particular checklist, she was completely positive it contained a certain progression of events that Darling was extremely familiar with, having been on the receiving end countless times.
"Apple..." Darling hesitated, barely above a whisper, not accustomed to speaking her mind as it came.
"... which means next should be the song I prepared!" Apple smiled up at her obliviously, Darling's quiet voice lost to the wind.
"Apple!" Darling exclaimed more loudly. "I, um, I have to go. I'm, uh, late for an armor fitting! Maybe later?"
"I..." Apple tried to reply, but Darling vanished within the next moment. She visibly deflated, "Okay. Later."
She tried terribly not to seem as if her feelings were hurt-- as a princess who'd been raised on such teachings herself, Apple knew exactly what one ought to say if a courtship gesture was unwanted, but you did not wish to hurt the other party's feelings. Darling, as always, had executed the technique perfectly, and Apple would have hated to mar that ever-essential gentleness by seeming overly disappointed.
There were harsher ways she could have been let down, Apple sighed, at last forlornly flipping through the pages of her color-coded checklist, Apple returned to the front. Decisively, she crossed off the topic labeled "Chapter One: The Perfect Balcony Serenade." She simply didn't know where she'd gone wrong, particularly when she'd taken such thorough notes.
"I'm so sorry, guys," Apple turned and solemnly addressed the veritable army of songbirds she'd recruited for the event, who'd been ever-so excited to help their Princess White woo her fairytale true-love. "I guess we'll have to take a rain check on that concert."
She was met with a fleet of disappointed twitters and chirps, a white dove coming up to nuzzle her cheek in order to assure her that not all was lost. It cooed comfortingly.
"You know what? You're totally right," Apple pet the dove before lifting her finger so it could fly away. A determined expression set into her face, "I can't give up completely... true love is royally important to me, so I have to at least give it another try! I mean... we've already shared true love's kiss, sort of. All right, it's time to go back to studying! Thank you all ever so much for coming out to help."
Apple smiled and bade her songbird friends a sweet farewell, her mood significantly lightened in her optimism. Then, as they left, her expression grew serious again as she made her way back towards the library. True love itself was at stake here, she knew, and she would learn everything that she would need to know in order to obtain it.
"Um, Apple?" Briar Beauty looked at her friend askew, faintly perplexed. "You know that's not the Princessology hextbook, right?"
"I'll review my notes for the test later tonight," Apple assured her friend. "Besides, this is more urgent."
"More urgent?" Briar gave pause in the middle of her dancing, her study-party being themed around a class shoeswap. She toed off one of the Dancing-Princess-styled shoes they'd be tested on tomorrow. "You have never, ever considered anything more urgent than a test."
"Well, it is one of the easier topics," Ashlynn Ella slid herself on the couch next to Apple. "Except for the in-test essay about the Dorothy's Slippers Controversy. I just don't know how I'll make the required word-count on time."
"Easy for you, you mean," Briar ribbed Ashlynn. "Your mom is Cinderella-- you were practically taught the history of royal footwear as a nursery rhyme!"
"There's Cinderella's Glass Slippers, the Red Velvet Shoes, the Swan Lake ballerina's slippers, and all Twelve Dancing Princess ballet flats," Apple recited, not even pausing in her note-taking. "The trick to getting them all in order is to memorize them by color and the pattern of the wear on the soles as opposed to just size, since princesses three, six, seven, and ten are all size eights. I wrote my essay on the Dorothy's Slippers Controversy last night and I have all three-hundred required words memorized. I can point you to some of the hextbook passages I used, if you'd like."
"Okay, so maybe the Princessology exam isn't so urgent for you," Briar relented. "Still, it's not like my BFFA to not study the night before a Princessology exam. What book are you even reading?"
"Wait, I recognize the cover of that one," Ashlynn narrowed her eyes. "The Art of Wooing by Prince Passion Charming, 5th edition hextbook! Hunter's always asking me to help him study from it... though I always thought he was more than romantic enough all on his own."
"The hextbook for Advanced Wooing?" Briar frowned for a moment before her expression lit up in realization. She grinned teasingly, "Wow, Apple, I didn't know you liked her that much."
"Shhh!" Apple buried her nose further into the book, glancing furtively around the room. Fortunately, the other students seemed too occupied with Meeshell Mermaid's rendition of a memorization-song of alphabetized shoe styles to pay them much attention (if any student in Ever After needed help with this test, it was Meeshell, who hadn't even had feet until recently).
"No, I think that's totally sweet," Ashlynn whispered with a giggle. "I'm so happy for you, Apple. I really hope it works out."
"Well, I've never, you know... been in courtship with another princess," Apple fiddled nervously with a page. "I'm not even sure the casual date thing I had with Daring even counts as courtship itself. Of course, royal protocol states that I should acquire the princess' favor, attain a quest to acquire her parents' favor, and proceed on to happily-ever-after, but..."
"I'm sure you'll do great," Briar assured her, patting her on the back. She glanced to where someone was trying to explain to Meeshell that Cinderella's slippers were just regular glass, not sea-glass. "I'd better go pull up the karaoke screen... it sounds like we're going to be here a while."
"I'd better go back to the study party, too," Ashlynn gently patted one of Apple's shoulders. "I still have yet to figure out my stance on the Dorothy's Slippers Controversy... I haven't even decided on whether I think the ruby version or the silver version is the real one, much less whether they count as royal footwear or commoner footwear!"
"The ruby and silver versions are from different eras of retelling, so they're both technically real because they both existed," Apple advised. "But if you ask me, only the silver slippers count as royal footwear, since the first Silver Era Dorothy married Princess Ozma, but the precedent for Ruby Era Dorothies is to return to the family farm."
"That's a royally clever point of view," Ashlynn clasped her hands together. "I don't know if I agree with it completely, but I think I understand my own position much better than I did before. You'll do great on the test tomorrow... and I'm sure you-know-who is just going to love whatever you've got planned for her!"
"I definitely hope so," Apple smiled and patted her textbook. "Prince Passion Charming's methods are scientifically proven to be the most romantic of them all! I'm sure I'll find something that works."
Ashlynn squeezed her hands, beaming. "Don't hesitate to ask me if you need any advice... I know that hextbook almost as well as Hunter does, by now. I'm incredibly happy for you, Apple... finding your one true love is the most enchanting thing in the world."
"I know," Apple chuckled back. "I think I'm just going to finish this chapter and go to sleep... let Briar know for me?"
"Of course," Ashlynn easily agreed, and hurried back into the party hollering, "Guys! Don't forget that Puss-in-Boots shoes qualify as nobility footwear because he gets knighted! Don't pin them to the commoner-footwear wall!"
Apple sighed and glanced over the Advanced Wooing hextbook's advice on standing out when you were in an entire crowd of adoring princes. Quite frankly, the entire chapter was inapplicable for Apple, who tended to always stand out by virtue of her own lineage, and never could manage midair somersaults or any of the other strange, ridiculous-sounding attention-grabbing feats. It was contradictory to what she'd been taught as a princess, that her demure beauty and goodness of heart itself would draw others to her... not this sort of fancy showmanship.
"This," she decided, "Is a royally confusing book."
And so she finished the chapter, dusted off her skirts, and stood, taking her notes with her back to her dorm. Briar's study parties were usually royally great for getting work done and thinking, but maybe, just this once, the topic of Apple's study required less Pin-the-Tale-on-the-Answer-Key and more peace and quiet.
She found her roommate Raven Queen tapping her MirrorPad screen so furiously that Apple thought it might break, but wearing headphones, at least. That was good enough for Apple, and so she settled into her plushly-padded desk-throne with her textbook, sighing deeply.
Raven glanced up from her game screen, which displayed that ever-irritating 'Game Over' page, and set down her headphones.
"So," she began. "This afternoon didn't go as planned?"
"Is it that obvious?" Apple slumped down over her notes. "She said she was late for an armor fitting appointment. I never got as far as singing."
"Maybe she really was late for an armor fitting," Raven attempted to assure her, sitting perched on her own bed. "I mean... isn't this month's royal-theme-holiday-thing the Coat of Arms Parade that the Charmings arrange?"
"Well, of course it is, but Darling doesn't usually--" Apple cut herself off as she realized what she was about to say. "Well... she doesn't usually participate in the marching, but now that she's been recognized as a hero..."
"Exactly," Raven agreed. "Besides, it's not like she can just wear armor from other years, like Daring or Dex-- she probably doesn't even have a set in her size with the family arms thing on it."
"Actually," Apple brightened. "Now that I think about it, I'm pretty sure Daring, at least, always takes this opportunity to have his armor refashioned or resized. It takes forever after to wait for him to get ready."
"See?" Raven insisted. "Totally not weird at all. She probably just got busy and forgot she was late, and when she saw you, she just... sort of remembered? Because you're royal-y and dutiful-y?"
"That's one of the nicest things anyone's ever said to me, Raven," Apple giggled a little. "I royally appreciate what you're trying to do. I'm just so... well, it's just that I've never been the one doing the asking-out before."
"Have you tried, I don't know, walking up to her after class and just asking her out?" Raven suggested.
"Oh no, I definitely can't," Apple looked shocked by the very prospect. "That would be weird... we'd only ever spoken occasionally until we both joined the Dragon Riding team. And... I'm pretty sure that most of the time she was pretending to love her destiny as much as I love mine. Thinking back on all of the silly things I babbled on about under that assumption... I feel so foolish. I guess I barely know her at all."
"Then maybe find a time where you can learn what she actually thinks?" Raven shrugged. "You know... like a regular date?"
"I appreciate the advice, Raven, but I think I'd better stick to the classics," Apple sighed and tapped her textbook. "What about you?"
Raven seemed perplexed. "What about me?"
"How did Dexter ask you out?" Apple seemed suddenly very attentive, posed to take notes.
"What makes you think Dexter stuck to the classics?" Raven flushed.
"Well, he's a Charming," Apple cocked her head to the side. "The classics aren't just in their family... their family sets the precedent for the classics."
"It was a letter," Raven admitted, trying not to go into excessive detail lest she be questioned about the mishap that had ensued from his unclear signature.
"Ooh! That's definitely a good one," Apple flipped the pages of her textbook. "Here it is... Chapter Five: Wooing by the Written Word, Part One: Prose."
Raven shook her head, fondly exasperated. That was definitely Apple for you-- the type of girl who thought everything had an answer in a book. Flicking closed the Call of Beauty tab on her MirrorPad, Raven opened up her hexting program. There was only one thing she could reasonably do in this situation.
Raven Queen: hey, dex
Dexter Charming: Hey, Raven! What's going on?
Raven Queen: apple's... being weird. i thought you might be in the same boat, especially if you've spoken to your sister lately.
Dexter Charming: Surprisingly... yeah. She usually has to be dragged to family Coat of Arms Day fittings, but she showed up almost on time today. It's a little unnerving, actually.
Raven Queen: do you know why? :/ i'm trying to figure out if it has anything to do with apple acting so strange.
Dexter Charming: Well... I have suspicions. Unfortunately, it's nothing I can really tell now... mom and dad are arguing with the blacksmith about helmet specifications.
Raven Queen: that sounds wicked scary... you go ahead and rescue that poor blacksmith. hext you later?
Dexter Charming: Definitely! Hext you later. :)
And it was on this note that Dexter pocketed his MirrorPhone and intervened, "Mom, dad... I really, really don't think Darling's helmet needs to be completely backless for it to show off her hair. I mean... that kind of defeats the purpose of wearing a helmet."
"Dexter, dear, your sister's hair is one of her most charming assets," Queen Charming attempted to explain to him, speaking slowly as if he were five years old all over again. "Goodness knows she'll need every charm she can muster if she hopes to look presentable in full-body armor."
Disapproval was written all over King Charming's face. "Perhaps we'd better forego a helmet altogether. You, smithy! How soon can we have a new tiara made... perhaps one that looks similar to a helm visor?"
Darling looked as if she were about to scoff at that. Instead, she frowned demurely and replied, "We only just decided on a filigree pattern ladylike enough to be acceptable for display. I would hate for that difficult decision to have gone to waste."
More than likely, Dexter thought, she just wanted to be able to wear her new helmet in case she actually had to go into real battle.
"Queen White's dragon-riding tiaras had a wonderfully ladylike design," Queen Charming gently patted her daughter's shoulder. "And they are charmed to prevent concussions. Perhaps we should get you something from that line?"
"There is no need," Darling assured her, her shoulders stiffening. "I already have a dragon-riding tiara, and unlike a helmet, it offers no protection from, for example, sharp objects like a lance or a sword."
"It is a good thing you won't need such protection," King Charming huffed. "Because your mother and I have agreed that you aren't entering the joust or the swordsmanship contest!"
"But father--!"
Dexter sighed, and slowly backed away from his family. Daring was still admiring his newly lacquered ceremonial sword hilt.
The younger brother fell in beside the blacksmith. He apologized, "Sorry about my family. I'm sure you know they can get a little... interesting."
"Do not worry, young Mr. Charming... your own helm will be custom-sized and fit with the appropriate eyeglass lenses, as usual," the blacksmith smiled slightly at the middle Charming. "Regardless of what your family requests of me this year."
Dexter smiled a little bit back. "I have an idea about how to fix the hair argument, if you want to hear it?"
"I think I had better, if I have no desire to stay here all night," there was a twinkle in the blacksmith's eye as Dexter discreetly whispered the specifications in his ear.
"Is that, um, doable?" Dexter hesitantly questioned.
"Most assuredly," the blacksmith patted his shoulder. He cleared his throat and drew the rest of the family's attention in his direction, "King and Queen Charming, I do believe I have a solution that can satisfy us all."
"Well?" King Charming demanded. "What is it?"
"I can forge a helmet with a very small hole at the top, towards the back of the head where normally a feather would be placed. I would, if you would permit me to, set this small opening with a ring of shining white pearls, covered on the inside with a piece of cross-cut white leather charmed so that nothing harmful may pass through," the blacksmith set the image splendidly. "From this opening, our Darling Charming may pass through a ponytail tied high upon her head, so that the hair spills out over the back of the helmet, and remove the tie with utmost confidence it may stay in place. Then, when she removes the helm at the end of this parade, her hair will cascade flawlessly over her shoulders without having once impaired her vision throughout the event."
Dexter watched his family's faces. He watched the way his father grinned the way he did when he knew there was glory to be had, when he knew how much admiration his family could garner. He watched his mother's eyelashes flutter, taken completely by the beauteous aesthetics such a scene would bring. He watched Daring, from the background, give it his seal of approval in the form of a thumbs-up, probably thinking no further than "that sounds cool."
He watched Darling's slightly devious smirk as she realized the suggestion, while offering nearly complete protection, also freed her hair so that she could use her magic touch even while fully armored. He watched as it dawned upon her that she'd been given a perfect opportunity to toss her hair in that special time-altering way and hurry over to the competitors' arena before anyone could stop her.
Dexter spoke first. "Well, I like that idea."
It was nice, he thought, to have everyone in his family agree with him for once. He was well aware that the idea wouldn't have been given its due attention if he'd brought it up himself.
The blacksmith seemed visibly relieved that they were able to conclude the miserable argument with all due haste, and claimed that it was high time he get to work on the new designs if the Charmings wished to have them done by Coat of Arms Day. Thus, the Charmings departed their regular family smithy, both parents returning home to their castle and all three children taking a valet carriage back to school.
Surprisingly, it was Daring who brought it up, "So, Darling, it isn't like you to show up to an armor-fitting on time."
"Maybe it's because this time, I was actually getting armor," Darling replied sweetly.
"And you're sure it doesn't have anything to do with Apple White?" Dexter rubbed his chin thoughtfully, trying to parse through the vague texts he'd received from Raven.
Something in Darling's gaze darkened, "Who told you about Apple?"
"Now, now, there's no need to be hasty," Daring interrupted. "Darling, don't be too upset with Dexter for bringing up your obvious affections for our friend Apple. I assure you, though I was at some point uncomfortable with the prospect of my future, my happiness at my sister and my good friend being true loves far outweighs my misery and the three existential crises I've had since then. Don't let it be me holding you back."
"It wasn't you," Darling groaned. "It was just... this afternoon, in the middle of push-ups, someone threw a bouquet of flowers into my room."
Dexter and Daring froze as if someone had dropped ice-cubes down their back. The exchanged a Look.
Dexter swallowed. Barely above a whisper, he asked, "It isn't that... they... have come back?"
"It isn't, right?" Daring squeaked, biting his nails in anxiety.
"No. I have exactly one suitor now," Darling shook her head, recalling the many sleepless nights she and her brothers had spent literally beating suitors from her door. "And... it's Apple."
"I am most relieved to hear that," Daring released a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding.
Dexter shifted uncomfortably, looking even more deeply troubled by this, "I... was hexting Raven earlier. She said that Apple was acting weird. It doesn't happen to have anything to do with her, um, apparently tossing a bouquet in your window, does it?"
Darling pointedly avoided making eye contact. "... maybe."
"Dearest little sister," Daring put a hand on her shoulder and looked at her in the way all older brothers look at their siblings when they believe a mistake has been made. "I know mother and father taught you to deftly dispatch unwanted suitors, but one does not simply treat Princess Apple White, the future Queen of All Realms and your fairytale-destined One True Love as one treats an unwanted suitor."
"Yes, well, maybe if someone had taught me how to receive a wanted suitor, I wouldn't have just blurted out that I was late for an armor fitting," Darling glared determinedly at her lap. "She had a checklist, you know. It started with throwing something to get my attention, and then it progressed into preparing to launch into a serenade..."
Daring shuddered. Dexter muffled a bout of laughter in his sleeve.
"How can you think that's funny?" Daring looked affronted on their sister's behalf. "This means that Apple found that book."
"You kind of have to admit, it's a little bit funny," Dexter swallowed his next peal of laughter. "I mean, Darling's always hated suitors who take great-uncle Passion's books literally... don't you think it's a little ironic that her fairytale-chosen true love is one of them?"
"A little too ironic, don't you think?" Darling rolled her eyes at her twin. She sighed, "At least she was royally cute trying to do it... I'm just worried she'll take it too far, you know?"
Daring winced, "Chapter Seven: 'How to Slay Monsters and Impress Your Maiden'?"
Darling crossed her arms and lowered her eyes, "... I don't wanna talk about it. I still feel royally bad that it happened."
"You know that the local good-witch cured all his burn wounds," Dexter's expression became solemn once more. "I mean, he lost his arm, but did you know that he's engaged to the witch's daughter now? It's all over their MyChapter pages."
"I said I don't want to talk about it," Darling frowned, drawing her brows together indelicately. "It's annoying when people think sending me love letters every day is a good idea. Serenading outside my window is only obnoxious. Public declarations of love are just embarrassing. And of course I feel bad about accepting expensive gifts!"
She heaved an enormous sigh. Dexter sensed there was more to it than that, though.
"But?" he prodded.
Darling lowered her voice to a whisper, "But I never ever want anyone to get really, truly hurt because of me again. I hate those books. I hate it when people think they're the end-all-be-all of how to court a Charming. But I especially hate it when things go too far."
"Don't worry about it, little sis," Daring elbowed her gently and winked. "Your brave and heroic older brother-- though definitely no longer her one true love-- would never let anything bad happen to Apple White! Saving damsels, of course, being one of my many talents."
"Besides, as long as you give a definitive answer of yes or no, I'm kind of... actually, I'm pretty much totally sure Apple's smart enough to get the hint," Dexter assured her. He paused, "You... are saying yes in this hypothetical scenario, right? I mean, um... Blondie wasn't just reporting empty gossip again, was she?"
"I mean," Darling flushed. "She's nice. I wouldn't be averse to a date or two."
Dexter exhaled in relief. "That's good. I mean... because I hate to assume things, not because..."
As if something had only just occurred to her, Darling frowned suddenly. "You can't tell Raven."
"Who? Raven Queen?" Daring seemed perplexed by the abrupt change in topic. "What does she have to do with this?"
Darling tried to explain, "Because she and Dexter hext like, seventy times a day. Plus, she's Apple's roommate... and I don't want her to know just because Raven told her. That's the coward's way out."
Daring shrugged, "Well, no Charming has ever been a coward! The reason, at least, is admirable."
"I think Raven already knows," Dexter shook his head, then pushed up his glasses. "But if you don't want me to say that you admitted to it, then I won't, don't worry."
"I royally appreciate it," Darling patted his arm.
"Regardless!" Daring peered out the window. "We shall be at school posthaste. Do you need an escort to your rooms?"
Darling rolled her eyes, "I'll be fine, tough guy. I make it all the way up to the dorms all on my own all the time."
"Hey," Dexter began. "Does anyone know why the carriage just stopped all of a sudden?"
Darling rolled down the window and poked her head out. She groaned, "Oh no."
Dexter leaned his head back and squinted, "There's no way... we've been gone for less than five hours!"
"Yes, you see," Daring gestured to the truly enormous pile of letters spilling out of Darling's bedroom balcony. "That's why I was asking. Are you sure you don't require an escort?"
"Thank you so much for the help," Apple White beamed as she leaned over to clasp a dwarf's hand. "I have no idea how I would have gotten all this done without you!"
The secretary dwarf nodded deftly. "It is of utmost importance to Queen Snow and your father that you secure your one true love and live happily for the rest of your days. We were more than happy to print off several thousand copies of your love-letter and ensure that each page was perfumed, enveloped, and delivered to its intended destination. Is your wrist all right after signing all of those?"
"Oh, don't worry about me," Apple hurriedly assured him. "I have several magically-linked pens from mom's office line for busy executives... plus, I'm ambidextrous! I only had to sign 531 times per hand, which is only a little bit more than usual for an autographing session."
"Nonetheless, your mother doesn't want you exhausting yourself. She hears you have a Princessology exam tomorrow," the secretary dwarf held up a pair of heavily cushioned wrist braces. "I'm sure you remember these from the time you over-strained yourself at the pre-Legacy Year autographing session. They should remove any lingering soreness or signs of carpal tunnel if you can keep them on overnight."
"Oh, Secretary Rem," Apple sighed. "I appreciate this, I really do, but... well, they're just so bulky. And... they're not exactly an approved wardrobe choice..."
The secretary lowered his glasses and gazed up at the princess with big, dewy eyes. "Please? Just so Queen Snow won't worry?"
"Well... all right," Apple reluctantly acquiesced, letting Secretary Rem strap her wrists into the braces. "But they're coming off first thing tomorrow morning... it's so fairy uncomfortable sleeping in these!"
"Until tomorrow morning," Secretary Rem agreed, finishing the last velcro strap. "If you need any further help, give us a call, all right? Remember that your parents are rooting for you, and all of us dwarves, too."
"Thank you so much, Secretary Rem," Apple smiled down at him. "Send mom and dad my love. And make sure your dwarves rest up after this, all right?"
"Will do, princess," Rem turned away from her and hollered at the rest of the dwarves that had gathered there. "Let's move on out, boys! It's naptime!"
The dwarves scrambled away a moment later, and Apple, feeling significantly better about this second attempt, cheerfully made her way down to the castleteria for dinner.
"Oh, Apple!" Blondie Lockes was by her side in a split second. "Whatever after happened to your wrists? Did you break them in some death-defying feat?"
"Well, actually, I was just signing letters," Apple informed her. "And they're not--"
"Humphrey! Start rolling!" she hollered. Blondie had a microphone shoved in her face a split-second later, "So it's true, then, that the letters in Darling Charming's dorm room are from you?"
"Well... yes, that's true," Apple tried a smile. She waved a little.
"This just in: Apple White announces her intended courtship of Darling Charming in a big way," Blondie hoisted one of Apple's elbows up so that the camera had a better view. "She'll stop at nothing to make sure her feelings are known, even if she has to break her wrists to do it!"
The MirrorCast was interrupted by the sound of a tray clattering onto the floor, silverware tinkling against the tiles.
Darling's eyes were wide with shock as she stared, horrified, at the braces on Apple's wrists.
Blondie dropped Apple's arm unceremoniously, hurrying over to the other half of her latest scoop.
"And here she is, viewers, Darling Charming herself," Blondie helpfully shut Darling's agape jaw. "Darling, do you have anything to say about this? Tell us all how lovestruck you must be, knowing to which extents our very own Apple White will go to for your affection!"
"I, um," Darling's eyes flickered quickly between Apple's wrist brace and her face, "No comment."
And then, like a flash, she was gone.
"Blondie," Apple sighed, gliding into the frame. "My wrists aren't broken... my dwarves were just being a little overprotective. Actually, I'm not even really all that sore. The braces are just to prevent carpal tunnel, and I'm only going to need them for one night."
"Breaking news!" Blondie moved into the camera so that she took up the entire frame. "New reports have come out that Apple White's wrists aren't broken-- but they are at serious risk of developing carpal tunnel. Will she be fine after just one night of wearing braces? Stay tuned to find out!"
Apple gave Humphrey a pleading look, begging him to cut the feed. He did so, much to her supreme relief.
"I'm, uh, going to go charge your MirrorPad," Humphrey announced. "You know. Just in case something important comes out later. You definitely don't want to be out of battery."
"Thanks, Humphrey," Blondie beamed, practically feeling her viewership rise. "Don't go too far, though! I can feel a story coming..."
Apple sighed and took a tray full of dinner, shaking her head as she sat down in her usual seat.
Briar gently sat a hand on her shoulder. "Rough day?"
"I'm sure it'll get better," Apple attempted to smile.
"It's all right if you've had a hard time," Ashlynn placed a hand on her other shoulder. "You don't have to hide it."
"It's been a little... less than fairest-day-of-them-all," Apple admitted. "Maybe I should put down the wooing textbook for a couple of hours and study a little more for good, reliable Princessology."
"You can help us refine our essays," Briar grinned, knowing just what would lighten her friend's mood. "Then, we can raid each others' closets to choose test-taking outfits!"
"I do love to pick out test-taking outfits," Apple smiled a little.
"We can coordinate shoes," Ashlynn beamed back, doing her best to keep Apple's mind off what seemed like not just one, but two rejections.
Apple took a deep breath. She felt a grin slide across her face.
"You guys are the most fableous friends ever after."
"Darling, dear, you can't hide from this forever," Rosabella Beauty soothingly rubbed what she presumed was Darling's shoulder.
"Yes, I can," Darling argued, her voice muffled under the covers. "Besides, I'm not trying to hide forever-- that's the coward's way out. I'm hiding temporarily. Like, maybe just an hour or two."
"I'm upset about the environmental damage, too," Rosabella assured her. "It is a lot of paper, and if some of it blows away in the wind or an animal accidentally eats it..."
Darling made a faint noise of irritation, "That's not making me feel any better about it."
Rosabella sighed and lifted one of the many, many letters that spilled across the floor. "Have you read one of these yet?"
Darling poked her head out from under her bedding. "Should I?"
"I mean, that is generally what one does when they receive a love letter. I'll just leave one right here for when you're ready," Rosabella carefully placed the letter within arm's reach before turning away. When she head the sound of a seal being broken, a grin spread across her face-- it was kind of funny, she thought, how very much Darling could be like a shy animal, afraid to eat from a princess' hand.
Darling hastily unwound the parchment, printed tidily in Apple's favored font. Her eyes clung curiously to the text, eager to learn exactly what Apple thought of her. Her heart thumped.
Dear Darling, the note began...
I am ever so sorry that my attentions this afternoon were unwelcome. It was royally unfairest of me to presume that you would be available at such an hour, particularly when the event of Coat-of-Arms Day presses upon your familial responsibilities. I hope that this letter, which can be more readily read at a time of your leisure, finds you well. ☺
I only wish to express how much I admire you and wish to know you better. The protocol for letters of this variety is to spend the first several sentences extolling your beauty... but I'm sure you've already received plenty of other letters which have done that, possibly more eloquently than I ever could. I know a lot of the ones I receive start out that way. Usually, they finish that way, too. I do think you're royally pretty, but I admire so much more about you than just the way you look.
I think it's amazing how brave you are. I can only imagine how much courage it must have taken to show all of us that you were the White Knight of Wonderland... and that's not even counting all of the heroic things you did for us before then. I was terrified of having to cross swords with the Red Knight, but then you swept in and saved us! Even before then, I can scarcely fathom how much courage it must have taken to find the time to practice such things, especially since your parents are so royally traditional.
I guess you can say that I admire your strength, in that respect... how you always stand up for what you believe in. I was royally impressed by the way you supported our friend Raven during the entire Evil Queen debacle, even when my own actions were less than fairest. I don't think I ever thanked you for forgiving me for that incident, but I hope you know that I'm grateful beyond words.
You're really, truly, hextremely smart, too. Even though anyone can tell that you're gallant and lion-hearted from a glance, I don't think you get enough credit for being clever as well. It isn't even just that you have good grades in class or that you have a good memory. Even when I thought nobody else was going to show up to research for the school newspaper article on Wonderland, you were there, and you were so excited to learn more. I felt like even if it would be only you and I working together, we could get all of the research done.
I think that maybe that was the moment I started to admire you, even though I didn't know it yet-- that moment where I thought that even though nobody else was interested in the idea, you still wanted to learn.
Though I used to think you were as happy with your destiny as I've always been, I like the Darling Charming that I see now just as much, if not more. I really hope we can get to know each other better sometime-- and this time, you don't have to pretend to be anyone you aren't.
Sincerely yours,
"Well, um," Darling could feel her cheeks redden as she lowered the page. "That's definitely not your average love-letter."
"I'm glad you liked it, at least," Rosabella smiled, carefully fishing up the last of the pages that had fallen from their dorm room balcony. "Hopefully that should prevent any further littering or paper waste. Do you want me to put these anywhere?"
"Oh, wherever there's room is fine," Darling hastily glanced around their dorm. She winced as she realized that the letters didn't exactly leave much space. "I'm royally sorry about the mess."
"It's all right... it's still tidier than the flowers that came at the beginning of the school year," Rosabella assured her. She was about to ask for more details about the note when she was interrupted by a knock. "I'll get it!"
She was met with Daring Charming's exceedingly charming grin. "May we come in?"
Dexter waved at her from behind his brother, "We brought food, since Darling left the castleteria without eating dinner. Is she okay?"
"I'm fine, guys," Darling pushed the door open and invited both of her brothers in. "I would've gone down to the kitchens to eat, you know... or at least ordered something from Book End delivery."
"They were serving angel cake for dessert," Dexter lifted a takeaway box from the bag. "Raspberry glaze."
"Nevermind," Darling seized it from his hand and began tucking into it voraciously.
"I had no idea she sent this many letters," Daring lifted one and curiously sniffed it. "Perfumed as well."
"Isn't it terrible?" Rosabella frowned. "Deforestation is one of the major sources of habitat loss for forest animals... I only just managed to finish picking up what portions of it were litter."
"Actually," Dexter interjected. "I think it's a pretty smart gift."
"Deforestation is not smart," Rosabella thwapped him on the nose with an errant scroll.
"I meant that Apple's signature is royally valuable on the MirrorNet," Dexter rubbed at his nose to make sure it wasn't broken. "There are a lot of potions that call for authentic love letters, too. You could probably pull a small country out of poverty just by selling these on Hexlist or eBroom."
"Besides," Darling added in Apple's defense. "Wasn't Queen Snow the one who passed the law that lumberjacks and huntsmen have to plant two trees for every one they cut down?"
"That's still not the same... animal habitats are usually built in well-established trees," Rosabella chided. She hesitated, "Still... about that small country..."
"We'll find see to it that an equal value in gold goes to some charity," Daring waved his hand. "The Charmings, after all, are not lacking in funds."
"You can't just choose a charity at random," Rosabella shook her head. She tried to explain, "They all have different goals... and not all of them go about achieving their goals ethically."
"Have you, um, read the letter yet?" Dexter did his best to subtly re-direct the conversation. "I mean... did you like it?"
"It was... kind of adorable," Darling paused in the midst of her eating. "Maybe it was the best letter I've ever gotten. I just... feel bad about the environment things, and the whole... Apple breaking her wrists thing."
"Apple didn't break her wrists," Dexter insisted. "The braces are a preemptive measure against carpal tunnel and cramps. I got Blondie to fix the-- well, I mean, I asked Daring to get Blondie to fix the story."
"You, little sis, have been saved by a one-on-one interview with Daring Charming," Daring elbowed her lightly. "I told Blondie that I was sure you'd only been shocked and flattered by the attentions, and that you would have an answer once you recovered."
"Gee, thanks," Darling rolled her eyes, wiping a bit of raspberry glaze from her fingers with a spare handkerchief. "I don't know what I'm supposed to say if she asks tomorrow!"
"How about... the truth?" Rosabella arched an eyebrow at her roommate.
"Shouldn't Apple be the first to know if I...?" Darling flushed, unable to say it out loud.
"Well, her dorm room is just down the hall," Rosabella reminded.
"Anyways, hall curfew's going to be soon," Dexter pushed up his glasses and checked his watch. "Daring and I should probably get back to the boys' dorms on the other side of school. You're all right here?"
"Of course I am," Darling seemed affronted by the very idea that she might not be.
"We'll catch you later, then, little sis," Daring smiled at her. He winked, "And of course, you too, Rosabella."
Rosabella chuckled and shook her head, "Sure thing, guys. See you tomorrow."
Once her brothers had departed the dorm, Darling went on a quick search for her MirrorPhone. She may not be moonlighting as a damsel-in-distress any longer, but Darling knew that it was only good manners to check in with a friend before dropping by for a visit...
Darling Charming: hey Raven is it ok if I drop by soon
Raven Queen: that depends... would you be dropping by to visit me, or to visit apple?
Darling Charming: you know that ur a wicked awesome friend! but I have sthing I have to talk to Apple abt
Raven Queen: sorry to break it to you, but my roommate's at briar and ashlynn's right now. something about coordinating outfits for a princessology test? not sure, since i don't take that class. is the thing you have to talk about urgent?
Darling Charming: its not like... SUPER urgent
Raven Queen: should i let her know you were thinking of stopping by?
Darling Charming: its ok Ill talk to her tomorrow
Raven Queen: all right, if you're sure.
Darling Charming: thx Raven... charm you later!
Raven Queen rolled her eyes and tapped out of the hexting app on her MirrorPad. "All right, Apple, I didn't tell her you were here. Are you happy?"
Apple blew her nose in a handkerchief and nodded. "You're the best roomie ever, Raven, and totally the complete opposite of evil. I royally appreciate it."
"Why are you avoiding her right now, anyways?" Raven quirked an eyebrow at her roommate. "Weren't you excited about the letter thing like, maybe two hours ago?"
"That was before I got rejected on live-feed MirrorCast," Apple shook her head and daubed away the streaky rivulets of teary, smudged mascara around her eyes. It was no easy task with her wrists still braced. "Besides... I can't let my future Princess Charming see me like this. It was bad enough that I broke down in the middle of Ashlynn's closet."
"Since when was 'no comment' a rejection?" Raven flopped backwards into bed. "I mean, Blondie even interviewed Daring, who said that she was just a little overwhelmed."
"In all the time I've known her, whether she was pretending to be a damsel or behaving like a knight, I've never known Darling to get overwhelmed by anything," Apple sniffed and scrubbed away the last of her ruined make-up. "That makes me more certain than anything that it was just a very, very polite way to turn me down."
"Maybe you should give the whole... Art of Wooing thing a break," Raven suggested. "I mean... what is it that you always say about dating? That we're still just in high school?"
"You're right, of course," Apple sighed and ventured a smile. She brushed a fresh coat of mascara, this time waterproof, over her lashes. "I'm going back to Briar and Ashlynn's... I'll do my fairy best not to wake you when I come back?"
"I'll probably still be awake... I promised Melody Piper I'd record a few acoustic riffs for her," Raven shrugged. "Good luck picking your test outfit thing, I guess?"
"Thank you fairy much," Apple smiled back, and slipped out of their room once more.