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Mikey wasn’t quite sure what he expected when he invited everyone over for a sleepover. He thought they could play a couple of video games, go through some bags of candy, maybe dare Mouth to take a swig of Mom’s good whiskey and laugh at whatever outrageous excuses he makes to avoid it.
He certainly wasn’t expecting Data to try and take apart Brand’s radio, which led to the Goonies being kicked out of the Walsh home.
They tried Data’s house, but his dad was out working and his mom had taken his sister somewhere, assuming Data would be gone the rest of the night.
Then Mouth’s house was automatically out, because it was Mouth’s house.
Chunk’s house was an option, but his mom would coddle the four boys until they left the next morning, and none of them felt like doing that, no matter what food they were promised.
So they were back at square one.
“We’re sorry Brand! Let us in! Come on, man!” Mikey shouted, banging on the window. For a minute, Mikey stupidly thought that Brand might’ve actually taken pity on them, and then his big brother shut the blinds in Mikey’s face.
“We’ll sacrifice Data if you let the rest of us back in!” Mouth offered, earning an outburst from Mikey and Data.
“He’ll kill me!” Data cried, ducking behind Mikey and out of Mouth’s reach.
“That’s the point, you idiot! He kills you and the rest of us get to sleep inside tonight!” Mouth retorted, trying to jump over Mikey who was doing his best to shield his friend.
“Come on Brand! You’re causing a civil war here!” Chunk screamed to the shuttered windows. “Can’t we just go to my house, guys? I’ll make my mom leave us alone!”
“No Chunk!” The other boys screamed in unison.
“We’ll wait him out.” Mikey said decisively. “At some point he’ll feel bad. I’m his baby brother, he can’t leave me out here all night.”
An hour later and every single game the group could think of played, Brand had not started to feel bad.
“It’s raining.” Mouth grumbled. “Why can’t we sacrifice Data, again? I think Brand was open to that.”
“Shut up Mouth!” Mikey said, collapsing onto one of the benches outside of the front door.
“Guys, guys, what if I made—“ Data was cut off by a cry from the other three boys.
“No!”
“Data, I love you man, but your inventions were what got us into this in the first place.” Mikey said, putting a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Besides, my mom should get home soon. Brand knows that. He’ll let us in before she gets here, or he’ll get grounded. We’ve just gotta wait a little longer.” Mikey was confident this time. No way Brand was dumb enough to get into deep shit with Mom just to prove a point to Mikey.
“If he doesn’t open that door in the next five minutes I’m making Chunk break down the door.” Mouth grunted, but sat down beside Mikey anyway.
After a couple of minutes of shivering and huddling together for warmth, the boys finally heard a click.
“God, you’re all such idiots. I didn’t lock the back door.” Brand muttered.
As they all rushed inside, there was a chorus of insults being thrown at Mikey for not telling them to check the back door, and a flurry of apologies as Mikey tried to rush away from the painful attacks his friends were trying to inflict on him as revenge.
Eventually they all settled down and collapsed in front of the television. Chunk had stolen Brand’s seat, and everyone warned him that Brand would bring hell down on him, but Chunk ignored them for the comfort of Brand’s favorite chair.
Chunk later regretted that and allegedly moved down to the floor of his own free will.
Mikey was lying on his stomach, watching whatever dumb movie that Mouth had demanded they watch. Data was lying right next to Mikey, sharing the blanket he had gotten from his room, while Mouth tried to act cool and sit away from the rest of them.
After another minute passed, Mouth moved to the other side of Mikey and yanked the blanket and muttered something about being cold. Mikey grinned at his friend.
Would it really kill Mouth to say that he wanted to be close to them?
“We’re missing something.” Mikey said.
“Yeah, another blanket. Mouth’s using it all.” Chunk whined, and he wasn’t exactly wrong. Mouth had essentially wrapped himself up in the blanket, leaving Mikey, Data, and Chunk to shiver in the cold.
“You’re all such babies, just go get another blanket. Or you could grow up and sit on the couch instead of cuddling on the floor.” Brand said. Despite his words, he just happened to “find” a blanket laying out on his bed when he went up there to change into his pajamas.
A blanket Mikey knew he had folded and put into the closet last night, but he wasn’t going to call out his brother for caring. He was going to try and use it though.
“Brand will you make us popcorn? It’s not movie night without popcorn.” Mikey pleaded, giving his brother his best puppy-dog eyes.
“Make your own popcorn, Mikey. I’m not your servant.” Brand said.
“I’m not allowed to use the oven, though.”
“You don’t need the oven for popcorn, idiot.” Brand sighed.
“See! I need you to make it, I don’t even know how popcorn works. Plus you make it the best.” Mikey added a bit of flattery, knowing the best way to get Brand to do anything was to appeal to his ego.
After some more grumbling, Brand relented and went to make the Goonies popcorn.
“I hate you.”
Mikey waited until his brother left the room to whisper to Mouth, “He loves me too much to say no if I ask enough.”
With a bowl of fresh popcorn, two blankets, and every pillow that had previously resided on the couch, the boys were ready for the real challenge. Horror movies.
“Can we watch an R-rated movie?” Chunk asked. “My mom lets me.”
“No she doesn’t! You’d wet your pants!” Mouth snapped.
“Like you wouldn’t? At least I don’t scream like Data’s little sister!” Chunk retorted, and he did have a fair point. Mouth did scream like a little girl.
“Don’t bring my sister into this! Don’t compare her to Mouth, that’s offensive to her!” Data said, poking Chunk in the side.
They kept bickering until Brand found the movie he had been looking for and put it on.
“None of you can handle a rated R movie anyway. I’m not having any idiots show up in my room like last time you geniuses had this idea because someone had a nightmare.” Brand said.
“I didn’t have a nightmare!” Mikey cried. “Your room is just bigger and we didn’t want to stay on the floor.”
“Ha! Mikey had a nightmare! Do you need someone to sing you a lullaby.” Mouth cooed at him.
“Shut up Mouth! You basically jumped into Brand’s arms when Chunk started snoring!”
“Just shut up and watch the movie you dummies.” Brand muttered, pressing play before they could argue anymore.
Maybe Brand was right about R-rated movies. Mikey would never admit it, but he could barely handle this. He was hiding it super well though.
He scooted a little closer to Data, just in case there was another jump scare.
At some point Brand had moved down to the floor with them. He wasn’t lying down like the rest of the boys, but they all slowly began to gravitate towards him.
Mikey didn’t understand how Brand could be so unmoved by all of this. Even Mouth wasn’t able to keep up his calm facade.
All four boys screamed at the next scare. Mikey flung himself at Data, who was already in the process of wrapping his arms around Mikey in fear. Mouth fell backwards and Chunk hid himself in the blanket.
“Maybe that’s enough for tonight.” Brand laughed. “Mom’s already not gonna like that I gave you popcorn for dinner, I don’t think she’d like to send you all back home with nightmares.”
“We’re fine!” Mouth said, but his voice lacked his usual arrogance.
“It’s just those two babies! Chunk and I over here are perfectly fine!” Mouth said, gesturing flippantly at Data and Mikey who still hadn’t let go of each other.
“Uh huh.” Brand wasn’t buying it for a second and switched the television off. “Alright, bedtime. Don’t come to my room this time, and if mom asks, you ate your vegetables.”
Before Brand could take off towards the stairs, Mikey grabbed his pant leg.
“What do you want, Mikey?” Brand groaned, dragged a hand through his hair. Mikey’s older brother clearly just wanted to go to bed.
“Awww, Mikey wants his big brother to rock him to sleep. Were you scared, Mikey?” Mouth mocked. Mikey felt his cheeks warm and shook his head.
“No! It’s just, why don’t you stay down here with us, Brand? You never hang out with us anymore.” Mikey wasn’t lying, he did miss his brother. Brand used to spend so much more time with the Goonies, and then he entered his freshman year, and suddenly he was too cool for them.
“Because I got better things to do, Mikey.” Brand said, shaking himself free of his little brother’s grasp.
“You don’t got better things to do right now, do you?” Either Brand missed them too, or Mikey sounded pitiful enough to make his brother hesitate. Brand would fervently deny either one, so it didn’t really matter.
“Yeah come on Brand! If you’re here we have enough people to play more games!” Data said.
“All-nighter?” Chunk asked through a handful of popcorn.
“Fine. And stop shoving all the food in your face, Chunk, I’m not making anymore.”
Brand sat down, somewhat grumpily, behind Mikey. He did end up making them more popcorn.
About thirty minutes later the “all-nighter” had failed miserably. Chunk passed out half past eleven, and Mouth fell asleep like five minutes later.
Mikey and Data stayed up and after drawing a couple of mustaches, insisted they were only plotting what to do next as they fell asleep. Mikey was sprawled out over Data and Brand’s legs, and Data was resting his head on Mouth’s torso.
Brand grumbled. He couldn’t move without waking Mikey, and if you woke up Mikey in the middle of the night, he’d stay up for approximately five seconds before managing to entangle you in his arms.
In this case, Brand assumed he would end up with a twelve year old boy curled up in his lap, who would in turn wake up Data. Data would follow his best friend, and then Brand would have another little kid clinging to him.
So Brand made himself comfortable, which did involve stealing a couple of pillows, but he made up for it by covering the younger boys in blankets.
Despite all of Brand’s efforts, he still found himself being clung to by the two youngest Goonies. Mikey had fully wrapped his arms around his brother’s waist and Data had curled himself up in Brand’s free arm.
At some point, Mouth and Chunk must’ve realized their friends had moved and rolled over until Brand had gained two more little kids sleeping on his legs.
Brand hated his life. Maybe he should’ve just left them outside. Mom had never come home, so she still must be out with Dad. Data’s parents had to be home by now, he should’ve just send the four boys over there and spent his night in peace. His body was going to ache tomorrow from this.
He needed to stop letting Mikey guilt him into doing stuff. Brand was still allowed to say he was annoyed, even if he carded his hands through Mikey’s hair just the way his little brother liked. Even if he pulled Data a little closer to his chest when the youngest boy started shivering. Even if he gave up some of his pillows to Chunk and even if he promised to not say anything when Mouth woke up from a nightmare.
When the Walsh parents finally arrived home at ungodly hours, their oldest son was fast asleep with all four of the Goonies surrounding him.