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It was always easier when they had connecting rooms. He knew he’d end up in her bed, or she would end up in his when they were on the road. It was far easier to navigate if they were neighbours; it felt far less sub rosa. No sneaking out at some ungodly hour of the morning, or scanning the hallway or elevators for other NASA employees at night.
It had started during training for Artemis II, after a day out of being in the field, flying into Stennis or Marshall. They both had commitments, hers were higher stakes of course than his of-the-moment-blonde but ultimately they both had reasons for establishing boundaries. What they had was an emotional connection, brains that could keep up with one another, he challenged her, he was playful with her, there was a trust that developed doing incredibly harrowing things together, an unbreakable bond cemented after they’d orbited around the moon, and at the end of the day, when all the chips were down, they truly did enjoy spending time with one another.
They were always physically careful. He controlled where his hands went, he didn’t try to take her clothes off, she didn’t ripple against him to further encourage him on the occasions she could feel him getting hard against her, they didn’t get caught up in kisses.
They’d usually just hold each other close, and talk. It was comforting, and safe.
Did he sometimes wonder what she’d feel like underneath him? Of course. Did she love seeing how he reacted when she’d let out a little whimper when he touched her. Yes. It was a bit of a dangerous game they were playing but there was always deep affection behind it. And they always stayed within the boundaries.
They were coming to the end of a ESA tour. Jeremy and Victor had flown back to Houston from Germany and Reid and Christina were set to fly back from Italy. It was their last night in Turin and they had been put up at a Hilton in the city centre. Nicely appointed rooms, crisp white linens, standard to them at this point, another day, another city. Fortune favoured them as their rooms were adjoining. She’d unlocked the door between them out of habit not long after she’d checked in. Still unsure if she’d end up in his bed tonight or if he’d make the move and end up in hers.
She’d showered and put on a cozy t-shirt and shorts, pulled her hair up into a loose top knot. When she’d exited the bathroom after doing a bit of skin care she was only slightly surprised to see he’d opened the adjoining room door and was standing in her room barefoot in sweatpants and a t-shirt.
“Hi,” he smiled.
“Hi,” she grinned back.
“Yours or mine tonight?”
“Yours.” She decided.
He held out his hand to take hers and he walked with her to his room, headed straight for the bed, pulling back covers and letting her crawl in. He followed.
His arms laced through her quickly pulling her close, never taking his eyes off hers.
“Hi,” he repeated now that he had her comfortably where he wanted her.
“Hi,” she smiled.
“You were great today,” He praised. “You nailed the speeches and the crowd loved you.”
“It was nice to do press just the two of us, a bit of a different dynamic.” She smiled.
He brought a hand up to smooth over her hair, not tampering with the elastic that held her curls on the top of her head.
“Reid.” She whispered serious.
“Mhmm.” He answered.
“I’m getting attached.” she confessed her breathing shallow and her eyes clear.
He shifted himself so he could be aligned with her face on the pillow, as the hand he had resting on her back started to trace gentle circles.
“Tell me.” He coaxes.
She exhales deeply.
“I’m starting to miss this when I’m at home. And that’s a problem.” She offers.
“Do you want to stop?” He asks calmly.
“No. And that’s also a problem.” She admits.
“Christina,” he starts before she interupts,
“Last week Bob tried to pull me close in bed and I physically recoiled because his hands felt different. And they felt different because they weren’t yours.” She confesses emotionally.
Reid sighed and pulled her close to his chest. There was silence for a couple minutes before Reid broke it.
“I made love to Rae last week half pretending and half wishing she were you, my hands kept getting caught in her hair clumsily because I’d gotten so use to running my fingers through yours.” He admitted.
She let a sharp exhale out from her mouth at that information.
“Reid we’ve been careful.” She whimpered.
“I know, we have. Haven’t we?” He reinforces.
She nods.
“What do we do?” She asks her lips brushing against his neck.
He lifts her chin with his hand gently.
“Do you want this to stop Christina?” He asks softly.
She shakes her head.
He twines his legs with hers closer and moves a hand down to her lower back to press her tighter to him.
“Then we just have to deal with missing one another, and missing this, when we are apart.” he reasons, his lips brushing against her hairline.
“It’s been a lot, we’ve just sort of sought this as a sanctuary, the last few months especially. Things will slow down in the fall… we won’t be training or touring so we won’t be able to have this as often, so maybe we’ll miss it less.” She states.
“Or miss it more.” He offers his eyes burning into hers.
“We’re so careful Reid.” she whispers
“I know. We are.” he replies.
“I sometimes wish you wouldn’t be careful with me,” she says plainly.
She feels him smile against her, his ribcage expands underneath her, and his lips curl against her forehead.
“I’m not always careful with you in my imagination Christina.” He admits, still smiling.
“Good.” She whispers, her own smile playing on her lips.
“I love holding you at night, waking up to you pressed to my chest, curls scattered, rising and falling with gentle breathing, soft little sighs when I wake you gently. I’ve never pretended this hasn't been intimate Christina, this connection, but I’ve always tried to behave myself.”
“You’re a gentleman Reid. And I feel safe and loved with you.”
“You are those things. But if this is making your whole life difficult, and causing you more trouble than comfort we need to stop.” He soothes.
“We’ll stop in September Reid,” she murmurs, “until then, keep being careful with me.”