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I don't know what's wrong with me.
I'm always energetic. Even when I'm tired. Even when I'm upset and angry. I can always pick myself up and fake it.
But now... I don't even know. I feel like I'm glued to my bed, I can't even bring myself to raise my head more than a couple inches. My whole body feels heavy.
I woke up because Tina began crying but I don't even care about that now. I just feel tired, even though I know I had a full 8 hours of sleep.
Brad opened my door without knocking, already in his running outfit. "I'm going out for a jog. You think you can actually make it out of bed for once?" He said sarcastically.
I guess it was a little funny considering I really couldn't make it out of bed. I just mumbled a soft no.
He kissed his teeth and went to the side of my bed to actually look at me. "You know you can't just rot in your bed all day."
Normally I'd make some snarky remark, but I just stayed quiet. I couldn’t bring myself to do it.
He pulled the sheets off me. I curled up into myself. My parents barely ever turned on the heater unless it got to the negatives. Too much money they said.
"Listen Donovan," Brad snapped. "You can't just ignore me. Remember, I'm the adult here. You're already in high school, you can't just do this on your weekends. You need to actually do something productive and not be a complete waste of space."
My voice felt hoarse. I'm not sure why. I'm not hot, my nose isn't runny. But I just felt sick all over. Maybe I'm just sick in my head.
"Just... leave me alone..." That was all I could whisper before I felt like I used up all my words.
Brad just rolled his eyes. "You know what? Forget it. You're a lost cause. Just waste away in here."
He shut the door quietly, but I could feel that he wanted to slam it.
I feel like I've heard those words a million times. I probably heard worse too. But for some reason I'm crying.
I'm covering my mouth so Kandy or Tina don't wake up. That way I won't have to go through the embarrassment of being caught crying.
I feel so gross and annoying. Maybe Brad is right. I am being a waste of space. I'm a lost cause. Maybe I should just dissappear. I think that would make everyone happy.
How pathetic.