Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

It wasn't the first time Jihoon had noticed the stares. Hell, he'd known Junkyu since they were 10 years old, of course he'd noticed the longing stares his best friend always received.

The worst part was that it wasn't even just girls. Boys looked at Kim Junkyu the same way, like he'd personally hung the stars in the sky. It's not as if Jihoon could blame them really, Junkyu did have a very handsome face.

The problem, which Jihoon couldn't for the life of him understand, was why he was so bothered by this fact. Liar, his brain often told him, you know exactly why you're so bothered by it.

Those were the times when Jihoon felt like he would combust. Alright, so maybe he did feel a slight attraction to Kim Junkyu, but as we'd just established, who didn't? Junkyu was just that likeable.

But he doesn't smile at them the way he does at you, said that small, selfish part inside him, with his bright white teeth on display, small crinkles forming at the corners of his eyes as the most adorable laugh bubbles out of his throat—

"Um Jihoon? Are you even listening..?"

Jihoon broke out of his stupor to see three pairs of eyes looking at him with concern. He forgot what they were talking about before his thoughts took a hold of him so he just nods, acting as if he had, in fact, been listening.

Hyunsuk's eyes narrowed at him. "No, you weren't. You were off somewhere in your head, weren't you?" And Jihoon just gives him a sheepish smile in return, causing Hyunsuk to let out an overly exasperated sigh before re-explaining everything he'd just said in the last 20 minutes. Jihoon tries his best to listen closely this time, considering that this assignment is going to contribute to like, 40% of their History grade.

"The Korean War was a military conflict between communist North Korea and capitalist South Korea and officially began in 1950 when—"

"HYUNSUK HYUNG!! WE NEED YOUR HELP"

Jihoon felt his lips quirk up slightly as Hyunsuk shut his eyes and looked like he was regretting all of his life decisions before turning to face the source of noise, which happened to be two panic-stricken, out-of-breath freshmen who rushed into the room.

Park Jeongwoo and So Junghwan.

The latter bowed deeply upon seeing the other seniors in the room and mumbled a quick apology as his friend immediately began explaining the current crisis they seem to have found themselves in.

"Doyoung got locked in the Home economics classroom and we can't get the door to open," Jeongwoo hurriedly explained, "We even tried to send Haruto in through the window but the idiot got his tall ass stuck so now he's basically just sitting on the window frame!"

Hyunsuk sighed and got up from his seat. "Did you happen to ask Mrs. Lee where the key to that classroom may be?" Jeongwoo immediately went silent and exchanged a glance with Junghwan, before saying, "We didn't want to bother her."

"And why would that be?"

"Because—"

"Because Jeongwoo is too scared to face her after he rejected her daughter's confession at the festival last week," Junghwan interrupted, ignoring the look of utter betrayal his friend gave him.

"Yah! Junghwan! I panicked, OK? She was going on about love at first sight, what was I supposed to say?!"

The others burst into laughter at the duo's bickering. Jihoon remained silent, his thoughts pulling him away from reality once again, as Jeongwoo brought everyone's attention back to the problem at hand.

Jihoonie? Do you believe in love at first sight?

He sees the others packing up.

Pfft, no way! It only exists in movies and fiction.

He hears Hyunsuk muttering something about being friends with idiots.

You sure? Because I think it might be real.

He feels someone tapping his shoulder and telling him to hurry up.

That's cause you're a hopeless romantic, Kyu. You can't just look at someone and instantly know they're your person.

He smells the distinct scent of jasmines that wafts in through the open windows as the air changes direction.

I don't know...sometimes you just look at someone and feel the entire world fade out. Does that make sense?

He tastes something bitter and metallic on his tongue.

...No?

But he understands now. He understands what Junkyu was talking about all those years ago.

Forget it then.

Jihoon had not forgotten it. He'd pestered his friend to explain until finally Junkyu had relented, turning to look at him from where he'd been sitting on Jihoon's bed.

It feels like everything becomes clearer when you look at them. You find yourself smiling and laughing more often around them. Suddenly the world doesn't seem so dull anymore.

Jihoon thinks someone is calling his name.

Dull? Kim Junkyu, how dare you say the world seems dull when I'm a part of it?!

And Junkyu had just smiled at him. But it wasn't one of his usual bright smiles. It felt...sad. Like Junkyu was pitying him.

Exactly.

13-year-old Jihoon hadn't really given much thought to it back then. But thinking about it now made his heart hurt a little.

Sooo does that mean you fell in love with me at first sight?

He should've known at that moment.

Don't talk nonsense, Park Jihoon!

He didn't have a chance.

Junkyu was tired. He'd spent the last 40 minutes in the library trying to find old history textbooks and papers but to no avail. Perhaps Hyunsuk had been right. They should've started preparations as soon as the professor finished explaining the assignment.

But Mr. Jung gave the same assignment to his graduating class every single year. So they could easily just re-use some of their seniors' work and the old professor wouldn't even know!

Sadly, it seemed that the man had gone out of his way to remove all traces of previous assignments, if Junkyu's efforts in the library were any indication.

Well, at least we have Hyunsuk hyung.

Their friend had agreed to help them out as best as he could. So while Junkyu was scanning the library from top to bottom, Yoshi and Jihoon were probably with Hyunsuk, trying to understand everything that happened in the Korean War.

Junkyu took one last look at the library's history section before getting up and heading towards the empty 4th floor classroom where the others would be.

He was mildly surprised upon finding the room empty. Huh, he thought, maybe they were done early?

[squad goals: 5 members]

junkyu: where are you guys
junkyu: i thought we were meeting at the usual place?

yoshi: a crisis arose
yoshi: but now its being averted

jihoon: we're in front of the home economics classroom. 2nd floor

junkyu: tf u doing there

hyunsuk: two words. kim doyoung.

junkyu: understandable
junkyu: ill be there in a minute

He switched his phone off and started heading towards the 2nd floor. A bunch of juniors were standing near the staircase and whispering furtively amongst themselves while sneaking glances towards him. Junkyu ignored them and moved onto the stairs.

Over time, he'd grown used to the stares and the whispering. Ever since he was little, he'd been exceptionally attractive. Old ladies used to pinch his cheeks and coo at him. Then, as he grew into his teenage years, his classmates used to be jealous of him for still managing to look fairly decent while they went through the horrors of puberty.

Mostly, though, people looked at him with desire.

He'd lost count of the numerous confessions he had received since middle school. Nearly every time he'd turned down their proposals, saying things like, "I'm not ready yet" or "I'm still waiting for the right person".

He still went out occasionally, hoping against hope that this person might be right for him. But it never worked.

Because even when he was having the time of his life being kissed by a boy, or charmed by a girl, he couldn't stop imagining Jihoon's face leaning in close instead of a stranger's.

And that realization felt like a punch in the gut. Because, as far as he knew, his best friend didn't want him like that. And Junkyu would rather die than let his complicated feelings get in the middle of their friendship.

He had arrived on the 2nd floor. Some sort of commotion was going on at the far end of the corridor. He immediately spotted Jihoon's face amongst the crowd and pulled himself together before going to stand beside his friend.

"So, uh, anyone gonna tell me what's going on?"

Jihoon jumped nearly a foot into the air before turning around and smacking Junkyu's shoulder.

"Junkyu! Don't sneak up on me like that!"

Junkyu stifled a laugh and nodded towards the people standing there in question. Jihoon glanced towards the classroom door "Doyoung got locked inside the room and Haruto somehow got stuck on the window frame so Junghwan and Jeongwoo came to us for help. Yoshi's now gone to get the keys from Mrs. Lee."

Junkyu's mouth formed a little 'o' in surprise. "Isn't she conducting that seminar thing right now? Might take awhile till we get a hold of those keys."

Jihoon met his eyes and grinned.

"Wanna run away?"

"Sure."

Of course, they wouldn't actually run away. They'd just take a stroll around the school grounds together till their friends caught up with them.

Sometimes, though, Junkyu wondered what it would be like to run away for real; to be free from the stress, expectations and struggles of his daily life. Perhaps he'd go to a meadow or farmland, surrounded by lush green trees and sweet-scented jasmines on all sides.

But he couldn't imagine a life anywhere without his closest friends. Junkyu didn't show it often, but he loved his friends more than he'd like to admit.

Hyunsuk had always been a steady presence in his life. He was someone who Junkyu could depend on.

Yoshi was one of the sweetest people ever. He was always willing to help Junkyu.

Doyoung was a little shit...but he'd managed to squeeze himself into Junkyu's heart anyways.

He wasn't as close to the others as he'd like to be, but he was still quite a bit fond of them.

And...Jihoon. Jihoon had been his best friend as far back as he could remember. If he were to be honest, he didn't even realize the exact moment when he started falling for Jihoon.

It hadn't been one of those dramatic, shocking discoveries. Instead, it was more like a soft, gentle oh, as Junkyu realized that he'd started seeing Jihoon as something more than just a friend.

The relationship between him and Jihoon encompassed time and space. It contradicted the laws of nature. It was pure, unadulterated chaos. It was a pull that neither distance nor time could break. It was as if their souls were simply bound together.

But soulmates didn't necessarily mean lovers.

"Kyu? You alright?"

Junkyu slowly opened his eyes before turning to smile at his friend. "Yeah, Hoonie. I'm alright."

What the actual fuck is going on.

This thought passed through Hyunsuk's mind on a daily basis. He had graduated last year with a degree in arts, from one of the finest high schools the country had to offer. He lived in a small, one-bedroom, road-facing apartment in Seoul. He also worked part-time at a bookstore owned by one of his father's friends.

He had applied at various songwriting programs and submitted applications at different music labels. A few had responded, but none of them had seemed all that eager to actually give him the job.

He was running out of time though. His parents had agreed to wait one year. If he didn't manage to join a music label by then, he'd have to go to college and try to get a degree in something that was "actually useful", as his father often said.

Hyunsuk inwardly rolled his eyes. His father had never really understood his love for music so eventually Hyunsuk had stopped bothering to explain.

There were only two things that Hyunsuk would go to desperate lengths for, one being his career in songwriting, and the other—well, his kids.

Of course, he didn't have any actual kids. But he was the eldest in his circle of friends and the boys often teased him by calling him the "mom of the group".

Truth be told, he didn't really mind the title that much. In fact, he'd grown quite a bit fond of it. Looking out for his friends gave him a purpose and brought structure to his hectic life.

Yet, as he stared at the current mess he had been dragged into, he felt a headache beginning to form behind his eyes.

"So let me get this straight. You thought it’d be a good idea to hide a stray raccoon in my closet because you thought it looked lonely?"

"Look at his little face, hyung! He’s a victim of society," Doyoung pleaded, doing his best to block the closet door with his body. "Plus, he seems to like your songwriting notebooks."

Hyunsuk rubbed his temple and looked over to where Junkyu and Yoshi were perched upon the old couch, before saying, "You two knew about this?"

Junkyu raised his hands defensively. "Don't look at me, hyung. I told him raccoons carry rabies but he said this one has 'gentle eyes'."

"He does have gentle eyes!" Doyoung protested.

Yoshi gave Hyunsuk a sympathetic look and held up his phone. The screen showed a website for an animal shelter. "I've already dialed their services," he explained, "All we can do now is not make any sudden movements, otherwise we'll startle it."

Hyunsuk thanked the heavens and all that was holy for sending Yoshi into this world. But his silent relief was cut short by Doyoung's indignant squawking. The younger boy stared at Yoshi in absolute disbelief, clearly having had no idea that animal services had been called in the first place.

"You called them?" Doyoung gasped, his jaw dropping. "But hyung, I wanted to keep him!"

Yoshi opened his mouth to reply but his words were cut short by the sound of the doorbell ringing.

Before Hyunsuk could even take a step forward, the front door swung upon to reveal Jihoon standing on the threshold and looking way too energised for a Tuesday afternoon. He took one step inside, his sharp eyes instantly scanning the room. They took in Hyunsuk’s annoyed expression, tracked over to Doyoung bodily guarding the closet, and finally flicked to Junkyu on the couch.

Even in the middle of a disaster, Hyunsuk couldn't help but notice how Jihoon’s gaze always seemed to latch onto Junkyu whenever he walked into a room.

"Alright, what did I miss?" Jihoon asked, kicking off his shoes as his attention snapped right back to the obvious target. "What life-threatening situation have we got ourselves into this time?"

Junkyu let out a soft huff of amusement and gestured towards the closet with his chin. "Doyoung brought Hyunsuk hyung a new roommate."

"He's a wild raccoon," Yoshi supplied helpfully.

A slow, highly amused grin spread across Jihoon's face. "Someone's on a roll today. First you get yourself locked in the Home Ec. room, then you decide to stash a raccoon in hyung's closet?"

"He was lonely!" Doyoung whined, stomping his foot.

Jihoon chuckled, tossing his jacket onto a nearby chair as he sat down next to Junkyu on the couch; letting their shoulders brush each other as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

Now Hyunsuk wasn't the most observant person out there, but anyone with a working pair of eyes could tell that those two had something going on between them.

Sure, they had been best friends for years but best friends didn't look at each other like that, did they?

Hyunsuk was getting annoyed. Sometimes, he wished he could just bash their heads together and point to the invisible sign hanging right above their heads and tell them to fucking make out already.

Sadly, it didn't work like that. Which is why Hyunsuk was forced to sit through their flirting and keep his mouth shut, because he wanted to let them figure things out for themselves without being pressured by others.

From across the room, he watched the casual, seamless way the two of them always slotted into each other's spaces.

If Hyunsuk's mind wasn't busy still processing the fact that there was an actual raccoon inside his closet, he might've rolled his eyes and added this particular moment to the 'times-I-want-to-lock-two-idiots-in-a-room-and-not-open-the-door-until-they-realize-their-feelings-for-each-other' box in his head.

His attention was diverted by the sound of low, rhythmic scratching coming from the closet, followed by a heavy thud that sounded suspiciously like a jar of protein powder crashing to the floor.

Doyoung froze, meeting Hyunsuk's eyes for a split second before bracing himself and opening the closet door to check what had gotten the raccoon so agitated.

That was all the invitation the raccoon needed. A grey, furry blur exploded from the closet, screeching as it launched itself directly at Doyoung's face.

Doyoung screamed, falling backward onto the floor as the raccoon scrambled over his shoulder and started running around the apartment floor.

"Oh my god!" Junkyu yelled, instinctively pulling his legs up onto the couch cushion. Jihoon threw his arm out in front of Junkyu, shielding him as the raccoon bolted across the living room coffee table, sending empty soda cans flying. Yoshi scrambled up onto a nearby chair, holding his phone high in the air as if the animal might try to steal it.

"Someone catch that damn thing before it ruins this whole place!" Hyunsuk shouted, waving his arms, his headache completely forgotten in the sheer adrenaline of the moment.

The raccoon zoomed up the curtains, knocked a half-filled cup of juice on the carpet, and then, seeing the open window near the kitchen counter, made a desperate leap. It landed perfectly on the window sill, paused to hiss at the entire room, and hurriedly vanished down the fire escape.

For a moment, nobody said a word. Then slowly, Hyunsuk turned around and assessed the damage his apartment had taken. Honestly, it wasn't that bad, but it'd be a pain in the ass to get that stains out of the carpet.

"Yoshi, tell animal services that our problem is solved," he ordered. "Jihoon, Junkyu, try to make yourselves useful and get that window closed before another one decides to move in."

Jihoon and Junkyu didn’t move to close the window. Instead, they both crept forward, staring in absolute awe at the beige rug, which along with the huge stain of juice, was also littered with tiny, purple, raccoon-sized paw prints that led straight to the window.

"Wow," Jihoon said, pulling out his phone and snapping a picture with the flash on. "Look at this. It’s art."

"Delete that," Hyunsuk snapped, finally dropping to his knees beside the spreading puddle of dark juice. "It’s grape juice. Do you know what grape juice does to synthetic nylon? It stays there forever. Doyoung, get over here."

The freshman shuffled over, his shoulders dropping as he rubbed the back of his neck.

"Hyung, I swear I didn't mean to wreck your apartment!" he began earnestly. "He was just sitting there by the dumpster behind the school, looking all frozen and lonely. I thought... I don't know, I thought we could just hang out and give him some food. I'm really sorry. I'll help fix it."

Hyunsuk let out a long, ragged sigh. It was hard to stay furious at someone who had caused a small natural disaster out of sheer, misguided empathy for a raccoon.

"Alright, enough feeling sorry for yourself. If you want to help, get down here," Hyunsuk muttered, his tone softening just a fraction before he looked up at the others. "Junkyu, kitchen. Grab me some dish soap. And vinegar. If there's any vinegar."

"What kind of vinegar?" Junkyu asked, blinking blankly from the hallway. "Like the dark stuff we put in salads?"

"White vinegar! Regular, clear white vinegar!" Hyunsuk yelled, his voice cracking slightly under the stress. "And a towel! A white one! Don't bring me a colored one, the dye will bleed into the carpet!"

Doyoung crouched down next to Hyunsuk, eager to help. Before Hyunsuk could stop him, the freshman grabbed a crumpled math assignment from his own backpack and aggressively started scrubbing the center of the stain.

Hyunsuk nearly cried out. "Stop! You're not supposed to scrub it! You have to blot it so that the pulp doesn't reach the floor padding!"

"I am blotting it!" Doyoung argued defensively.

"That is the literal definition of scrubbing." Jihoon chimed in, though he still hadn't put his phone away. "Doyoung, do it again, I missed it. Look at the camera and say 'I love giving Hyunsuk hyung mini heart attacks'."

"Go away, Jihoon." Hyunsuk muttered, using his bare hands to press a piece of paper towel onto the wet spot. "Yoshi, could you please get me another towel from the bathroom?"

"On it, hyung."

Yoshi jogged out a few seconds later, holding a neon pink bath towel with a cartoon flamingo on it. "It's the only one that wasn't damp, but it's colored. Will the flamingo bleed into the grape?"

Hyunsuk closed his eyes and took a deep, ragged breath. He was vastly outnumbered by idiots, but looking down at Doyoung–who was still hovering anxiously, trying to help out–Hyunsuk didn't have the energy to keep yelling.

"Just...give me the bird towel," Hyunsuk sighed but before he could reach out, Doyoung had already snatched it. The younger boy then slammed his entire body weight onto the fabric over the stain.

"Pressing. No friction. See, hyung? I'm fixing it!"

"You're doing great, sweetie." Jihoon mocked from the couch.

For the next ten minutes, the living room was a place of quiet, rhythmic routine. Junkyu managed to find some dish soap in the kitchen, making their task a bit easier.

While Hyunsuk, Doyoung and Yoshi took turns pressing their weight on top of the stain, Jihoon and Junkyu cleaned out the paw prints which stained the floor and arranged all the other things the raccoon had knocked askew.

Finally, their work was done. It wasn't perfect. The carpet would always carry the stain. But the worst of the crisis had passed, and the bright, purple puddle had faded into a faint, dull lavender.

Hyunsuk wiped the sweat off his forehead and turned to address his friends. "Alright, I think that's all we can do. I'll just move the coffee table 3 feet to the left and everything will look as good as new."

The others murmured their agreements. Junkyu stood up and stretched his arms. "It's getting late. You guys ready to head home?"

"Wait! We barely did any work on the assignment today!" Yoshi intervened.

Junkyu pouted. "Oh come on, Yoshi! The due date is next week! We'll just do it tomorrow."

Jihoon nodded, getting up to stand beside his best friend. "He's right. Besides, I don't think Hyunsuk hyung still has the will to explain the Korean War to us after all that cleaning."

Well, he's not entirely wrong about that, thought Hyunsuk, grimacing.

"Fine," Yoshi said. "But you two better do some research tonight so that you have at least some understanding of the topic before we meet up tomorrow."

The two of them agreed, grabbing their respective backpacks as they started heading towards the front door with Yoshi in tow. Junkyu and Jihoon's families were next door neighbours. Yoshi lived not two streets down from them, so it was quite common for those three to head home together.

Meanwhile, Doyoung's house was a bit far from the school which was why he preferred to stay over at Hyunsuk's place on weekends.

Today, however, was a Tuesday. Yet, the boy was still sitting on the floor, pulling at a loose thread on his shirt. He didn't even react when Jihoon playfully ruffled his hair on his way out.

The apartment door clicked shut, leaving the living room in abrupt silence. Hyunsuk walked over to the kitchen counter and started tidying up. When he turned around a few minutes later, Doyoung still hadn't moved from the floor.

"Hey," Hyunsuk said softly, leaning against the counter. "Everything OK?"

Doyoung swallowed, finally looking up at him with a hesitant expression. "Hyung? Can I... can I stay here tonight?"

Hyunsuk studied him for a long moment. He knew a bit about the situation at Doyoung’s house; the sudden shouting matches, the cold dinners, and the heavy silences that made a kid want to wander the streets until he found a stray raccoon to keep him company. Hyunsuk noticed the pattern, of course, but he knew better than to push it. So he never questioned it.

"Yeah, kiddo. You can stay."