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Sodachi had a bounce in her step as she came home. Unlike her loser brother, she actually attended a club, so she always got home later than him. However, what that meant is that she got the fun experience of him being there to greet her when she got home.
She poked her head into the living room, but he wasn’t there. Since his bike was outside, she knew he had to be home. That meant he was in their room. It wasn’t as easy to sneak up on him theore, unfortunately.
She greeted Tsukihi and Karen as she passed by their room. She had to be careful to not get dragged into whatever current scheme they were involved in, so she kept it brief. Then she walked up to her bedroom, knocked on the door, then stepped inside.
Koyomi was lying on his bed. He was reading a book. Sodachi grinned. There was her avenue of attack. “Wow, I can’t believe you’re reading porn without locking the door,” she said
Koyomi panicked. He dropped the book on the bed, then shot upright. He glared at her, then rolled his eyes. “I-It’s not porn,” he said, defensively. Of course, Sodachi already knew that. She had seen the cover. It was a perfectly innocuous light novel. It wasn’t even one of the skeevier ones she knew he liked. He could read it in school and nobody would blink an eye.
Sodachi pouted. “What? Not going to say hello to your dear sister? Were you too busy jerking off?” She snickered.
As Koyomi sputtered in place of a response, Sodachi dropped her school bag near her desk, then sat down facing Koyomi. “Anyway, how’s the Going Home Club?”
Koyomi shrugged. “I don’t know. Whatever? I’ve just been reading.”
“Awww. You were saving your studying for me? I’m so honored. You really do love me.”
Koyomi’s expression told Sodachi that wasn’t the case. She knew her dear brother’s test scores. He would never study if it wasn’t for her pushing him.
Since that’s what she was doing now, Koyomi got up, sat down at his desk, and began studying. Sodachi had her homework to do, but the two could collaborate, even for the classes they didn’t share. This would take up most of their evening, but Sodachi didn’t mind. Unlike her dear brother, she found joy in schoolwork.
Before long, their parents were calling them down for dinner. That was a fine enough break for them. Sodachi had finished all her homework, while Koyomi was nearly done. Sodachi had spent the rest of the time studying up on the subjects she was worst at. Once dinner was over, it would be back to the studying mines.
Well, that’s what she had been thinking, but towards the end of dinner, she found herself wanting to take a shower. She took one nearly every day, so even if she had taken one the day before, it wasn’t an issue. Still, once everyone was done and Sodachi could leave, she hurried off to the bathroom.
She was going to clean herself, but the greater intent behind this was that she wanted to soak in the warm water. She wanted to enjoy the most basic elements of a bath. She wanted to lay in the water and relax.
That, and one other thing.
All evening, a sensation had been creeping through her. A feeling that she needed to let out. Once the water was running and Sodachi had removed her clothes, she began running her hands over her body. She shuddered, then placed herself in the tub.
It wasn’t her fault that she felt this way. That’s what she told herself, at least. She felt bad about it, so she had to find some excuse.
She was, after all, in love and lust with her brother. That was wrong.
Sure, she was adopted. While they referred to each other as siblings and Sodachi had never doubted her place in the Araragi family, she wasn’t related to them by blood. It was only through the power of social contracts that she had this bond with them. Legally speaking, there was no issue with her and Koyomi falling in love.
The problem was entirely social, but that was a big problem to have. Sodachi knew Koyomi wasn’t a siscon. She teased him about it all the time, but the love he had for his three sisters was entirely familial. She had no chance here. In fact, she would have better chances if she had never been adopted to begin with.
On the whole, Sodachi appreciated her adoption. While Sodachi had felt out of place early on, the Araragi family had never held back their feelings. They always insisted that she was just as much a family member as anyone else. Practically overnight, it was like Sodachi was made to be one of them. Family pictures, family vacations, and even meeting the extended family, it all came to involve her as much as anyone else.
Maybe it was the traumatizing circumstances that led to her adoption which had turned Sodachi into a deviant. Maybe it was the indecent conditions of a boy and a girl not related by blood sharing a bunk bed. Whatever the case, Sodachi was sure that there was something fundamentally wrong with her.
Why couldn’t she fall in love with a celebrity like normal girls her age? Or at least, why couldn’t she be gay? Either of those would be better than falling in love with her brother.
Sodachi knew that the life she lived as an Araragi was better than whatever her life would have been with her birth parents. However, when she found herself in a state like this, she couldn’t help but think. What if she lived a life where she and Koyomi could date? What if they could fall in love without controversy?
Sodachi caught herself moaning. She clamped a hand over her mouth. If anyone was using the bathroom, she wouldn’t want them to know. Not even Karen or Tsukihi.
Several minutes later, she was done. Sodachi emptied the bath, then replaced the water. If anyone was curious, she would say it got dirty. Not a lie necessarily, but it felt like an untruth. Then, once the tub was full once more, she dunked her head into the water. She felt like she needed to purify herself before she could look Koyomi in the eye once more.
Several minutes later, she was out of the bath. As she dried herself off, Tsukihi passed her in the bathroom. Sodachi waved to her, but neither said a word. Sodachi didn’t have anything to say to her younger sister.
Once she was well and dry, she returned to the bedroom. Koyomi was, once again, reading a light novel. Sodachi didn’t have it in her to tease him this time. Instead, she climbed up and collapsed in her bed.
Exhaustion was quickly catching up with her. Emotional tumult was tiresome. She had brushed her teeth and done everything else she needed to before bed while she was drying off, so she could fall asleep. In fact, she told Koyomi just that.
“I’m heading to bed.”
The lights wouldn’t be turned off until later. Koyomi could stay up pretty late. Sodachi could, too, but she tried not to. She wished this was one of the nights he would go to bed earlier, though. That way, she could sob without having to worry about him hearing it. She didn’t have it so easy. Instead, she hoped that she would feel better in the morning. Not that she would be cured of these feelings, because she wasn’t so naive as to expect that. She just hoped that her mood might improve.
At the very least, she hoped she would get up before Koyomi, so that she would have time to compose herself before he awoke.