Chapter Text
It was hot as hell in the auditorium, people running around, trying to get everything together before rehearsal started. Pandora sat in the back with Sirius, going over the last few lines before she had to go on stage. They had been off-book for a few weeks now, but recently, the stress had gotten to her. With tech week starting, she wanted to be completely confident. This was her first time playing a lead. She was lucky enough to be co-starring as Sandy in one of her favorite musicals of all time, Grease, her co-star being the infamous Sirius Black playing Danny Zuko. Sirius was basically Danny in real life, it was almost perfect casting. He was even wearing most of his own clothes, donating some others to the rest of the cast.
Maybe it was a little awkward being a love interest with her best friend’s brother, especially because they weren’t on good terms. But Regulus had assured her that he didn’t mind. Plus, he got to see it all from backstage. All of Pandora’s friends, including her twin brother, were helping out with the show. Theater was her safe space, the place where she can really be herself. It was stressful at times, especially in the final week, but she loved it more than anything.
Pandora and Sirius were going over their first song together, “Summer Nights.” They had skipped over the song in most rehearsals to save on time, it wasn’t a very complicated song. But it had been a few weeks since they had gone over it, and Pandora was getting nervous. So she was trying to go over her parts while Sirius read her script. They couldn’t very well sing in the crowded auditorium, so she just spoke her lines.
“Summer fling, don’t mean a thing.. But.. Fuck, what’s the line?” Pandora grabbed the script rereading the lines. She sighed, throwing her head back. “This is like the easiest song in the show and I can’t get it in the slightest. How do you do it, remember all of the lines? I keep messing up in the stupidest ways possible!”
Sirius took her hands in his, squeezing them slightly. “Panda, calm down. We have time before the show opens, and you aren’t that far off. You’ve got almost all of the show down. It’s just one song. So just take a deep breath.”
Pandora breathed in sync with him, trying not to stress over the thought of opening night being in four days. Tensions were already rising backstage, and she was worried about it affecting her performance, along with everyone else’s. She was the rock to a lot of her friends, and if she broke down now, they would all come crumbling down with her.
“Want to run it again?” Sirius asked softly after she had finished.
“Yes please,” she smiled and rewinded the rehearsal track.
They went on, running through the songs a few times before Pandora messed up again. This time, she got distracted. The assistant stage manager, Lily Evans, had just walked past. It was impossible not to notice her, fiery hair behind her and quiet confidence that only she could pull off. Pandora had been crushing on her for ages, although they hardly talked. Whenever they did, Pandora locked up and couldn’t get any words out.
It didn’t mean anything, however, because Lily was dating James, another crew head. Their relationship always seemed a bit forced to Pandora, but Regulus always said that she was just wishful thinking without actual direction.
“Yo, Panda. Over here, stop staring at Lils.” Sirius’ voice snapped Pandora out of her daze, realizing that she missed her cue into the song. She quickly apologized, starting the track over.
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In the middle of going through the track, Sirius was called over by the stage manager to get his microphone. The stage manager, Remus, was one of his best friends, so he bounced over with a grin on his face. As Remus taped the mic onto his cheek, Sirius felt a warm shiver run through his body.
“Is this okay?” Remus asked.
“Yeah, totally,” Sirius replied, desperately trying to sound normal. “Pandora’s really stressed over her songs, I was just trying to help her out.”
Remus chuckled softly, “She’s amazing, she has nothing to worry about.”
“Yeah, but she hasn’t had much time to practice with Summer Nights and she’s worried about it. I know her friends have been helping her a bit, but she doesn’t have someone like you to run lines with.”
Remus’ face flushes a bit, remembering the countless hours he had put in with Sirius to help him learn his lines, disguising it as just friends helping friends. Sirius noticed, of course, he always did. He smiled slightly at the blush on Remus’ cheeks, he loved knowing that he was the one to put it there. Remus didn’t handle compliments well, which was part of the reason why Sirius loved giving them to him so much.
Truth was, Sirius had been having thoughts about Remus recently that were definitely not just friendly. He obviously wasn’t going to and couldn’t go through with anything, he was too scared to ruin their friendship, but it was getting harder and harder to hide it, especially when Remus seemed to be flirting back at times.
Remus was also one of the very few people that knew that Sirius was genderfluid. Along with James, Peter, and Regulus, Remus was the only person that called him anything other than “he.” Everyone else, with the exclusion of Regulus, only called him “they” at times. Reg would sometimes use she/her pronouns, but it was much rarer than Remus. It was still all so new to Sirius, experimenting with his gender expression. He knew that Regulus had some trans friends, but Sirius still wasn’t completely comfortable in his own skin yet, still adjusting to not being fully a man.
“Alright, you’re all set to go to mic check.”
Was it just Sirius, or had Remus kept his hand on the back of his neck for longer than normal? He wanted to dwell on the moment, but ultimately decided to brush it off. Tech week had already started, Sirius didn’t want to add even more stress to his life by lamenting over Remus.
He was a bit disappointed to be leaving Remus, but nonetheless, he headed over to mic check, sang a few lines of “Sandy,” and headed back to continue running songs with Pandora. He was worried about her. She was an amazing singer, but her confidence was wavering as opening night was getting closer. She was stuttering over lines that she’d memorized months ago, and had told Sirius how worried she was about getting her solos wrong even though she turned heads every time she sang them.
Luckily, she was feeling better, and they got through Summer Nights with no issues. Just as they finished the last note, Remus came up to them.
‘Hey guys, you two sound great, I’m just letting you know that we’re going to start warm-ups soon before tonight's full run.”
Sirius and Pandora got up and headed to the green room, Sirius rushing since he was supposed to lead them and completely forgot about it. When they got inside, most of the cast was already in a circle, his best friend and fellow circle leader, James, standing in the middle smiling at him. James was the head of the Run Crew, and was always doing a thousand more things than he needed to. It was clear to everyone that James was the real backbone of the theater department, though no one would ever say that to his face. He might have had a rough start with theater, not having joined for exactly the right reasons. But that didn’t matter anymore, because James had worked his ass off to get to all of the positions that he has today.
Sirius and James led the cast through physical and vocal warmups, ending it off with an energy game to make sure the cast was pumped for their run. Sirius made eye contact with his brother, who was very obviously staring at people’s costumes trying to determine what needed to be fixed. Regulus, like James, took on way too many extra roles and was the head of not one but two crews. Sirius had been pressuring him to do theater with him for years, but it was only recently that Regulus had reluctantly decided to give in. Sirius would have never expected for him to be as involved as he is, but wouldn’t change it for anything.
After circle had ended, Remus told the cast that they had about half an hour to finish getting costumes, mics, and makeup on before their full run. Sirius and Pandora had already finished everything, so they headed back to the back of the house to continue running their lines.
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Evan was panicking. He hadn’t expected to even get in the show, much less get a lead role. When Barty had convinced them to audition, it was just a spur of the moment decision, he had thought nothing of it. But now, it was all starting to feel so real since tech week had started. He had an entire song to himself, for God’s sake! He wasn’t ready for that! Everyone was stressed, the props weren’t even 100% done, and he could tell that the entire cast was disappointed in the state of the set. He didn’t know why, they’d been coming in during lunch to help work on it and it looked great to them, but what did they know? Everyone was stressed, he knew that. He had been running lines with Pandora for weeks late into the night, and she had even been sleeptalking some of her parts. It felt silly for him to worry over a single song when his sister was the lead in the show.
After circle, Evan ran out to the lobby, looking for a place that wasn’t surrounded by people so that he could finally catch his breath. He sat with his back to the wall, head resting on his knees. He knew that he knew his lines, but he wasn’t a singer, he never had been. He hadn’t minded singing the song during the rehearsals, but now that he was wearing a microphone and had his costume on, it hit him that hundreds of people would be watching the show on Friday. Watching him.
Suddenly, Evan felt a hand on his shoulder, and fingers on his chin, gently coaxing him to raise his head. When he did, he found himself face-to-face with an all too familiar pair of brown eyes framed by dark green hair.
“Hi, Barty.”
“Hi, Rose. Are you okay? I was looking for you after warm-ups but you just ran away.”
Barty was the only person that Evan would let touch him like this. He didn’t really like physical touch, but it was comforting from Barty. They’d only been best friends for a few years, boyfriends for three months, but as far as Evan was concerned, nothing before them mattered.
“I don’t know,” Evan responded, dropping their head back onto his knees. “I’m scared about my songs.”
“Why? You know them perfectly!”
“Yeah, that’s not what I’m worried about. I’m not a good singer, I’m worried about people laughing at me.”
It was hard for Evan to admit that, but the feeling of Barty resting his head on top of Evan’s and wrapping an arm around him made them feel a lot better. Barty gently cradled Evan’s head against his chest, pressing a kiss into his hair.
“No one’s going to laugh at you, I promise, and you are a good singer, I don’t want to hear it.”
It was easy for him to say. Barty had been in chamber choir forever, though he hated admitting it. He had sung with Pandora for all the talent shows, and every time he auditioned for a solo, he got one. Even though he didn’t fully believe Barty, Evan could tell that Barty believed himself, and that was enough for him.
Evan finally looked up at Barty, the tension bleeding out of his face.
“You’re going to kill it tonight, Rosie,” Barty muttered into his ear.
Evan smiled. “Thanks, Bee.”
Barty pulled away quickly, lacing their fingers together, pressing a kiss to Evan’s knuckles before swinging their arms together. “Come on. Let’s go before we’re yelled at for not being in places.” Evan let out a quick laugh at Barty’s dramatics, but who was he to judge?
Barty led him back to the green room where their director, Ms. McGonagall, was waiting for them. She looked over Evan in gentle concern, having noticed him run off before. He quickly assured her that he was alright before following Barty backstage. Just as Evan closed the door behind them, he ran into James Potter.
Just great, the person he really wanted to see right now. It’s not like Evan had anything against James, it’s just that the man was infuriatingly perfect. Along with theater, he was in the top of most of his classes, captain of the rugby team, and dating Lily Evans, the golden girl. Now, being perfect wasn’t inherently bad. But Regulus hated him, so Evan hated him. He wasn’t really sure why Regulus hated James as much as he did, but it didn’t change a thing. Anyone that Regulus hated, Evan was obligated to hate as well. Plus, it seemed to him as though James had only joined theater to chase after Lily.
Sure, maybe over the past few years, he had actually participated in the community and became a circle leader, but it was still based on a shaky past. Evan had been in the crew for a couple years before this show, so he was accustomed to the ways of the troupe and didn’t like James Potter barging in and taking charge.
Also, he was pretty sure that Pandora had a crush on Lily, which made Evan hate James even more, as he was basically taking away any chance that Pandora had with her. He couldn’t blame Lily, James was hot, but his sister was a much better match for her than stupid Potter!
James sped past them, clearly preoccupied, knocking Evan backwards into Barty. As rude as he is, James sent a quick “Sorry!” over his shoulder before running out into the hallway. Barty, ever the dramatic, dipped Evan instead of normally catching him, pressing a quick kiss to his lips. Evan giggled quickly before getting up and composing himself. A faint flush was still on his cheeks, but he ducked his face in an attempt to hide it. Just then, the first lights rose up, and Evan heard the opening notes of the Alma Mater start to play. Barty grabbed his jacket off of a rack along with Evan’s, helping Evan into it. As Evan’s entrance approached, he breathed deeply, squeezed Barty’s hand, and then quickly dropped it as the two of them ran onstage together.
They both got through the first few scenes pretty smoothly, but by his song, “Those Magic Changes,” he was shaky. He messed up a few words, but he got through it. Plus, once he got off stage, he was rewarded by a kiss from Barty, and that made him feel much better. They had practiced together before, Barty had heard him sing it more times than he could count, but it was still nice to know that he liked it. After he got through his song without messing up much, he was much more confident for the rest of the show, only messing up a few times by forgetting his blocking.
The rest of the show was a bit of a blur for Evan. By the end, all of them were sweaty and tired, but smiling. When Ms. McGonagall called for notes, Evan collapsed onto Regulus, who was sitting by the edge of the stage. Regulus rolled his eyes, pushing him off and onto Barty, who had just sat down next to him. Evan was more than okay with this arrangement. Barty maneuvered Evan so that his head was in his lap.
“You did so good, baby,” Barty said, running his hands through Evan’s hair.
“God, get a room,” Regulus complained, fake gagging.
Evan and Barty just flipped him off, the three of them softly laughing until the stage managers sat down to give notes for the night.
Notes were minimal. Barty got told to turn down the sexual innuendos during Greased Lightin’, for probably around the fourth time. Everyone knew that he wouldn’t actually do it, but it was still a necessary note. Evan’s only real note was about blocking, which gave him peace of mind. There were a lot of notes about the set, it wasn’t quite finished. Everyone was asked to come in during lunch to help paint the sets. Evan, of course, would definitely come in. He missed working on sets, he hadn’t had much time since getting a lead. He loved painting, especially, it calmed him a lot. He made a mental note to come in with Barty the next day and help James with his sets. After they were finally done, Evan felt a lot better about opening night, and he drove home with a smile on his face and Barty in the passenger seat.
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“How long is he going to take, my God?” Regulus complained as he watched Remus talk to Ms. McGonagall and Lily.
Sirius turned to him. “He’s just trying to make sure that the show goes well, leave him alone.”
Regulus rolled his eyes, but sat down and waited. After a few more minutes of talking, Remus walked over to them. “Sorry about that, I had to clear some things up. How did day one go for you two?” Remus asked as the three of them began to walk outside.
“Pretty good! I’m excited for opening night,” Sirius exclaimed.
“I’m glad, you sounded amazing tonight.” Remus met Sirius’s eyes with such a force that Sirius had to look away. “What about you, Reg?”
“A. Don’t call me that, B. It would have been better if James wasn’t bothering me the whole time.” Regulus climbed into the backseat of Sirius’s car, dumping his bag on the floor, while Remus politely sat down in the passenger seat.
Remus turned around to look at him while Sirius began driving out of the parking lot. “I thought you liked it when James bothered you,” he said, raising his eyebrows.
Sirius laughed.
“Shut up, Remus,” Regulus replied. His tone was harsh, but his almost-perfectly concealed smile gave him away. It was something that Sirius had seen countless times before, that he memorized and always knew how to spot.
“Oh?” Sirius looked between the two of them with a dramatic head toss.
“I said shut up.” Regulus’s not-a-smile had faded, so Sirius dropped the topic of James.
He turned to Remus, leaving Regulus to scowl in the backseat. “How do you think it went today?”
Remus smiled, a sight that Sirius thought about way more than he probably should. “I thought it went really well! Everyone sounded great, it ran pretty well, obviously there’s more to be done but I think we’re in a pretty good place for day one of tech week.” Remus fiddled slightly with his hoodie strings, avoiding looking up at Sirius. “Peter’s finally got all of the lighting and sound cues down, so it’ll also hopefully run much smoother tomorrow. Reg..ulus, how are the costumes coming along?”
Regulus perked up at that, being the head of costumes. “They’re good. All of the Greasers are done, and most of the Pink Ladies. Pandora’s dress ripped today, but luckily it was a pretty easy fix. I got it done during the dinner break, but I ran out of yellow thread just before I finished. I think I have some more at home, but it isn’t the exact shade, so I’ll have to check it tomorrow and see if it’s close enough. Mary didn’t fit into the first edition of her dress, so I had to adjust the bust, but I think she can fit into it now.” Regulus trailed off at the frown on Remus’ face. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”
Remus hesitated for a second, concern flashing over his face. “I just.. Did you skip dinner to work on the dress?” Sirius quickly elbowed Remus, shutting him up. Regulus’ face flushed, his head dipping.
“I.. Had eaten before rehearsal, I just wasn’t very hungry. Stress of tech week and all that, you know. I wanted to get everything done as quickly as possible”
Remus looked like he wanted to ask again, but another sharp jab from Sirius paired with a glare shut him up. The space fell into an awkward silence, Regulus staring at his phone for the rest of the ride. They quickly arrive at Remus’ mum’s flat, Regulus climbing into the front seat after he leaves.
As Sirius pulls out of the driveway, he groans loudly. Regulus, knowing what was coming, sighed before turning his full attention to Sirius. It was a routine every time Sirius hung out with Remus, he always complained to Regulus afterwards.
“Like he was definitely flirting with me before rehearsal started. He blushed when I complimented him on his ability to run lines with me! Like, full red face blushed! But then he just whisked me away like everyone else. I get it, he has to help other people, but I’m his best mate! I matter more than them, he should care about me more!”
This brought a scoff from Regulus, earning him a glare. Regulus tried to reason with his brother, “He can’t always make time for you, especially not when tech week is just now starting. He has priorities, that isn’t a bad thing.”
Sirius let out a long groan. He knew that Regulus was right, that he was being reasonable. But that didn’t change the fact that he wanted Remus to pay attention to him. Sirius had been going out of his way recently to spend as much time with Remus as possible, to try and gauge what Remus’ thoughts on him were. To his disappointment, Remus didn’t seem to be reciprocating the excitement, often becoming distracted with stage manager things that Sirius didn’t understand.
Every time Sirius would try to get over his feelings, Remus would do something small that would send him spiraling again. He didn’t know what to do. They were best friends, always had been, and if it were anyone else Sirius would have made a move a long time ago. However, something always held him back. Remus was one of the most important people in his life, and the thought of losing him over something like this terrified Sirius. So, he did nothing about it, even though it was secretly tearing him apart.
Sirius wanted to annoy Regulus even more, so he played loud sad music over the car's stereo. Regulus whined about it, but Sirius couldn’t hear him over the sounds of Conan Gray’s “Footnote.” “Sirius, save your voice, for the love of God,” Regulus yelled, but Sirius just turned it up a couple levels, grinning as he did so.
They stayed like that for the rest of the car ride, Sirius belting out his yearning playlist and Regulus groaning but softly singing along. When they finally got home, their mother was waiting inside for them at the kitchen table.
Sirius and Regulus both lost their smiles and fixed their posture. One of the main reasons that Sirius did theater so often was the added bonus of being home as little as possible. Many of his friends hated this, complaining that they never had time to see their families, but Sirius didn’t mind. He preferred it that way. Walburga Black was less than supportive of his acting pursuits, and never came to any of his shows, so he found theater to be his safe place away from his broken home.
“Why are you two home so late?” she asked coolly.
“I told you, Mum, we’re dropping off one of my friends after rehearsals this week.” Sirius looked at the floor.
“Which friend?”
“My friend Remus, he’s the stage manager.” Sirius noticed Regulus trying to sneak upstairs, and pulled him back.
“Oh, another one of those friends,” replied Walburga, spitting the words out. She hated his theater friends almost as much as she hated him being in theater himself. In her mind, the only men that were involved were queer, which was sinful in their house.
“Well, be quicker next time.” She sent him and Regulus upstairs with a shooing gesture, shocking Sirius, who expected a much bigger fight. Sirius quickly grabbed a banana from the kitchen on his way up, shoving it into Regulus’ hands just before he ducked into his room. Sirius quietly headed to his room, where he laid down and drifted off picturing Remus’ smile.