Work Text:
Plans generally go to shit pretty quick, Doflamingo was really aware of that since a very tender age, as he had planned all his life only to his father to ruin it all in a nothing.
He lost his status, home, even his mother. That´s where he drew the line, he wasn´t going to risk losing Rosy.
That´s why when someone came and offered help to form a new plan he agreed.
The new plan was excellent, it involved recover the life he had lost, his status. His mother had died, and his father was going to be the price, but he and Rosy would be alright as they were going to be together.
As you may be aware, that plan failed as well. The good part was that he got a new family in the process, one he loved very much and in return loved him back. That was the power of improving and adaptation.
Since the failure of Mary Geoise´s return he learnt that plans needed more than steps, they needed “What ifs” protocols when shit happened, and only leave improvisation as last recourse.
As mentioned before, Doflamingo loved his new Family and trusted his life in them, but he had made protocols in case one or more of them decided to betray him. Sadly it was proven to be so useful when his backstabber brother had done nothing but conspiring against him.
Family was to be chosen and that applied on both sides.
With the pass of time Doflamingo grew into someone who was capable to realize almost all his plans without really altering his parameters. It was not easy as he had to learn how to manipulate variables to do what they had to.
His plans had millions of threads and tons of them redirected to a desired path he had in mind or made the issues into ones that did not affect his other plans and the damage he got was so minuscule that couldn´t matter him less.
One day his slave business went to hell, but who cared, that was something the man he had left in charge could resolve on his own, or rot. Whatever, he got more money selling SMILE; he could afford losing the slaves for a while or for good.
He discovered that a fucking depressed suicidal bastard was alive and wanted to kill him.
(Like almost everyone wanted him dead, get in the line emo boy)
Doflamingo had a serie of protocols to be used when Law dared to try something.
When he did in Punk Hazard was so easily to be spied on.
Until it wasn´t.
He lost two dear members of his family that day.
And a Clown, yeah, that too.
However it was a calculated risk he had had in mind.
…Not the exact thing, but he had considered that the Tontattas would have to work harder to produce SMILE without SAD.
At least enough time meanwhile he got himself a replacement for the lost scientist.
Lucky for him the emo boy was a fucking idiot and kept his scientist alive, which already gave start to the protocol of getting Caesar back in case of kidnapping.
What was even more, the idiot was interested in an interchange.
Man was stepping closer and closer to where Doflamingo wanted him and he had already been in the trap for years.
He had heard warnings about Strawhat being a wild variable. Which he took in consideration once he saw him by first hand on Marineford.
That rubber kid had gone there without a strategy, he just had brawl to save his brother and the support of found allies, “clearly a future conqueror haki” he had thought back then, and proven right with the yell of the moron.
He had learnt to much from that battle, and that without even fighting directly.
What he learnt was that Strawhat was a sentimental fool. One that likely didn´t just lose 2 years.
If the rubber man had waited 2 years to cross to the New World, then he had at least to be on a decent range of power which Doflamingo shouldn´t underestimate.
That´s why he made the coliseum to be a distraction for him meanwhile he dealt with Law.
Just getting the akuma no mi of his late brother and it was the perfect bait for him.
The interchange he carefully had manipulated went to shit. Marines weren´t as cooperative as he expected them to be.
Which was ok, everything under the range of the plan.
It just meant he needed to apply the protocols of reducing the number of threats and acquiring new chips to bargain.
But he was stopped by a blond man. Handsome, he was totally his type. He recalled he was the cook of the Strawhats, Sanji, he was called…although his wanted posters did him no favor.
That man managed to stop him meanwhile the rest planed their escape and succeed to go with all and the handsome cook.
Which was OK, everything was still under the parameters of the protocols.
The strawhats were pussies who wouldn´t dare to kill Caesar, most of them wouldn´t.
The only worrying was that Caesar was an idiot and he would believe he was in danger with that bunch of kids and could lead to unfortunate scenarios if he intended to escape, again, something he had calculated.
He returned to Dressrosa, Ceasar recovery could wait, but he couldn´t allow Law to ruin his new home.
The Coliseum was great distraction but wouldn´t last forever, he still had the chance that Diamante defeated Luffy, but the rubber man was a wild variable so he shouldn´t count on his man as winner just to make himself feel better.
Still, he would be able to have advantage as the whole Kingdom was his territory, all his family (the not dead ones) was a fortress, and he wasn´t talking about Pica´s Akuma no mi.
Except that that too went to shit.
And once again that was… say it with me O-Fucking-Kay, because Doflamingo knew that his family wasn´t undefeatable; he wouldn´t nor couldn´t blame them for losing. Nobody was undefeatable.
The plan was on critical range of failure, meaning he was almost all without back up protocols.
He did what he had to, made everyone help him to capture his enemies, because even if the civilian were weak, they´re more than his enemies and the horror made wonders with whom people believed to be their enemies. Besides, he still had all his expertise on his akuma no mi.
A failed bird cage, the lost of his SMILE factory, his toy factory, his weapon merchandise and losing his Shichibukai privileges making the Marine arrest him was not part of any contingency plan.
Just fucking kidding.
Doflamingo, as stated earlier knew very well that nobody was undefeatable, which to his never humble opinion, sadly included himself.
The world government always loved to threaten him to taking away his title, which only made Doflamingo threatened back. It was a ball he knew very well already to not have a card under his sleeve.
It just meant that he would not have the world government back up. Big deal, that´s how he had started his pirate life anyway.
As for the arresting, well, Doflamingo had gained so many allies and enemies along his years, he was too important that his clients would like him alive and free.
And maybe that was because they would very much like to kill him with their hands or make him fulfill his deals. But he would be able to deal with it. It would maybe just take him time, money and reputation.
Then Jack, a man from Kaido came to his rescue.
–You better deliver the SMILE, Doflamingo–, the former Shichibukai rolled his eyes, but used the “ally” to get what he needed.
Without his protection, and Doflamingo having nothing then the Strawhats didn´t need of Caesar anymore, and the scientist had gained a specific enemy, which made easy to track down his whereabouts.
Somehow he convinced Jack to declare war against Big Mom in the name of Kaido.
It was an easy plan, even with injuries he currently carried he would be able to get out of there with Clown in hands and if everything went according then they could grab her laboratories´ shit.
What wasn´t in the plan was that fucking Strawhat was there too, neither he expected the fucking Germa 66.
There was a wedding, and… wasn´t that the hottie that stopped him from incapacitate the strawhat crew, the one standing at top of a gigantic wedding cake, looking like stupid figures those kind of pastries had? Figured that was likely the theme.
And since that blondie had ruined part of his plan, Doflamingo could with all right ruin his wedding.
–if there is someone who knows why these two shouldn´t marry speak now or forever hold your peace– the priest announced.
Doflamingo took this chance to make a great entrance –I oppose– he responded, flying towards the lovely couple.
All eyes were on him, everyone made a big gasp.
–what are your reasons? – the priest asked with great confusion.
Doflamingo shoved the bride; he grabbed Sanji and kissed him with great passion in front of everyone.
At first the groom resisted but once the kiss heated he could feel the cook responding and the start of a moan silenced by his own mouth.
With great difficulty he separated his lips from Sanji, everyone was still staring at them in silence. That bird guy was taking pictures.
He turned to the public, the priest and for final the groom.
He held tenderly his face as if they were lovers since a while; he saw confusion and lust on the man in front of him –because he is mine– announced Doflamingo.